A/N: Alright, I know it's been approximately 24 thousand years since I updated this story. And I'm sorry that it's taken so long. But hey, I did come back. Hopefully some of you are still around to read it.

I have a lot to say about the state of Jackson/April currently, but that would take up an entire chapter by itself, so I will refrain. Enjoy.

Jackson wondered if he would ever stop feeling so helpless. He knew Arizona was feeling the same way. She'd fluffed the pillows behind April's head, straightened the blanket a million times. It was eerily quiet in the room, except for the sound of the beeping machines connected to April. Meredith had commented on the amount of people in the room, so she, Alex, Riggs, and Owen had headed down to the cafeteria for a while, leaving Jackson and Arizona alone with his unconscious ex-wife. A word had yet to be spoken.

Finally, Jackson broke the silence. "How long have you known?"

Arizona's bright blue eyes looked up to meet him. "Since the day of the divorce. The day she found out, actually."

Jackson merely nodded. "If I had known...I wouldn't have...I never thought..." He trailed off and Arizona took a seat opposite of the room. "I think that was the point. She didn't want you to stay with her just because of the baby. She didn't think it would be good for either of you."

Jackson sighed and put his head in his hands. This is not how he imagined his day would be going. He had been a little annoyed when he heard that April was coming on the trip also. She had seemed to be so hung up on their demolished relationship, and he was tired of hearing about it. Truthfully, he hated hearing about it. The unraveling of their marriage hurt him deeply. He knew that April thought he had simply given up on them, which was partially true. But another part of him was simply scared. She had been everything to him. Then Samuel had been more. He'd lost his son, and he'd lost her, and he was left with absolutely nothing. April hadn't seen it that way. She hadn't seen leaving as him losing her. She felt lost herself, and went to find herself. Without him. He wishes he had gone the second time. He almost did. There were a lot of almosts in that time.

That was the worst part of it all. They had always been so close to getting it right, so close to being on the right page, but never quite got it. Every time complete happiness was within their grasp, miscommunication or tragedy struck, and he had been tired of trying to fit the pieces together.

But he missed her. God, he missed her. He missed his best friend, he missed the support, he missed the love, he missed it all. And try as he might, he could never imagine recapturing that feeling with anyone else. He'd felt a lot of regret in his lifetime, and even some in their relationship, but he'd never felt regret like that of the day that he signed those papers and called time of death on his marriage.

His thoughts were interrupted by Arizona's phone ringing, and she stepped out of the room to answer it. Now that he found himself alone with April, he took time to properly study her. He took in her pale face, the bruises visible above her wrapped arm. He was overcome with just how nearly she had come to dying. How close another child had come to dying. He buried his head in the blanket and began to cry.

He cried because of the accident. He cried because it was all his fault. He cried because of his failed marriage. He cried for the loss of his best friend, his wife, the love of his life. He cried for Samuel, and for this child that could have so easily joined Samuel. He cried for the unfairness of the world against two people who wanted nothing more desperately than to make it work.

I really do want this to work.

Jackson breathed as he watched the typing bubbles pop up on April's side. It had been another day of therapy, and once again, he didn't feel any more optimistic. April had grown frustrated, crying that he didn't even seem to want therapy to work.

Okay.

There was a lot unspoken, and Jackson knew that wasn't all she'd wanted to say. But maybe it was enough for tonight. He really did want it to work. He wanted therapy to solve all their problems, for everything to go back to the way it was. He just felt like the marriage was too far gone. He hesitated, then typed again.

I really do love you.

The bubbles appeared and then disappeared again for a few moments.

I love you.

Jackson wiped tears away from his face and turned over in the bed.

It had been three days since April woken up in the hospital. Everyone had been in the room when it happened, and with so much excitement going on, Jackson hadn't really had a chance to talk to her. A lot had happened after that. They kept her overnight, and Arizona stayed the night. After that, they had all returned home together, and he hadn't had a chance to speak with April privately. Until tonight.

He walked slowly up to April's door. He knew Arizona was staying with her to watch her, but he also knew Arizona was at work, giving Jackson the perfect chance to catch April alone. He rang the doorbell heard a quiet shuffling before the door opened and revealed his red-headed ex.

"Hi." He said, berating himself for having nothing better than that to say.

"Hi." She returned pleasantly, but he could sense the wariness in her tone.

They settled into an awkward silence until April finally invited him in. He accepted gratefully, and entered the apartment. He watched as April limped to the couch and took a seat, motioning for him to do the same. He sat down on a nearby arm chair.

Another silence ensued, once again broken by April. "So I guess you heard about the baby."

Jackson nodded. She drew a quick breath. "I'm sorry. I really was going to tell-"

Jackson shook his head and cut her off. "I know. It's okay."

Silence again.

"How did we get here?" Jackson asked wistfully. This is not how he imagined their conversation about baby number two going. None of this is what he imagined. April grimaced. "A lot of tragedy."

Jackson sighed. He had something he wanted to say. He'd been sitting on it for the past few days, dwelling on it, obsessing over it, and now he felt as if he didn't say it, it would burst out of him and destroy him.

"I love you."

April smiled sadly at him. "I love you, too. You are always going to be a very special person in my life."

"No, you don't understand." Jackson leaped from his seat, startling April and paced the room. "I love you. Like I'm in love with you. Desperately. Madly. I never stopped."

April looked absolutely dumbstruck. It's the same look she had on her face years ago when he interrupted her wedding to Matthew. He smiled at the memory. He never went to that wedding that day thinking he would be the one to walk out with a new bride. But it happened. He was able to convince her of his feelings then. And he needed to now.

"Wh-what?" April asked in disbelief. "But, I asked if you were sure. You said...you said..." Jackson moved to his knees in front of the couch, taking her hand in his. "April...a few days ago, I was hiding from this feeling. I was living in denial. I was bitter, and upset, and hiding from the fact that life was going on. I was lashing out at you. Then, the accident happened, and...I couldn't imagine a life without you. I was terrified out of my mind. I thought that you were gone. And then...Alex said you were pregnant...April I was happy, so happy, and then I remembered that we weren't together, and that your life and our baby's life were in danger. I've never felt that helpless. I've never felt that alone, or that much like an outsider in your life. I never want to feel like that again. April, you're my best friend, my favorite person, and I'm so sorry that I hurt you. Tell me it's not too late."

"Jackson, I-"

Jackson shook his head, cutting off the words that he was sure were coming. "Don't think, just tell me, do you still love me?"

April drew a breath and looked tearfully into his eyes. "Yes."

He dragged her towards him for a kiss. He kissed her hungrily, like he'd die if she didn't continue to meet his lips with hers. She kissed him like he'd disappear if she stopped, like it was all a dream that could fade away.

They had a lot to figure out, he knew that. But it was the first time in a long time that anything felt right.

A/N: I don't know if any of you have seen Jane the Virgin, but I borrowed a bit of a scene from there to wrap this story up. Speaking of which, that's a wrap. Hopefully it lived up to expectations. xoxo