"You'll be alright… No one can hurt you now…"
No… you're wrong…
Everything's alright…
Please… no more lies…

"I'm the one you left to win this fight."
I'm sorry…
"How could you leave me… when you swore that you would stay?"
Please forgive me… my lady…

I wanna tell you that you're all that ever mattered….

A heavy feeling lingered in my heart as I opened my eyes. I knew I had cried; I could feel the stains on my face. I lifted my hand to my face, wiping away the remnants from my cheek before bringing my hand down. I stared at my hand, my heart sinking lower into the darkness.

My lips were trembling as I let out a shaky breath. I'm still alive but I'm barely breathing. I moved my arm slightly, knocking down the bottle from the table next to me. I watched as it fell. It was falling like how this breaking inside of me was taking me down. 'Cause when a heart breaks, no, it don't break even.

My mind was still running through the fact that Marinette was Ladybug. It didn't bother me before, so why now? Was it because I knew I failed her and I didn't want to face that Fact? Shy, yet brave, kind Marinette… how could I not accept something so… obvious?

Would she accept me? My heart couldn't handle that kind of rejection. We've been through so much together as Chat Noir and Ladybug… if she suddenly pushed me away after finding out I was Adrien, if she found out I was the one who failed her… I couldn't take it. I couldn't handle the thought of someone hating me like that, not ever. Knowing it was her from the start… 'Cause I got time while she got freedom.

Everything that ever happened between us… it made my heart fail. It made it frail, weak… numb. I caused her to hate me before, and I feel she has yet to forgive me for anything that happened… so if this happens… If she found out I had failed her much worse than a misunderstanding… The thought alone…. I couldn't seem to breathe right.

My eyes shifted from the bottle to the window. I wanted to escape, run away from all of this… run away from the pain… run away from my heart. But I couldn't… I couldn't do anything, I was useless… compared to Marinette, who was so confident so… so brave when she was here… I couldn't. I wanted to escape from the pain I felt from my everyday life, so I became Chat Noir… Marinette… she has nothing she wants to escape from, she just wants to protect. I wish, I just wish I was like her… to be like that. I just acted like a brat given candy…

She…. She acted like a Hero, given the lives of Paris to protect… she was… pure.

And I was just the darkness. I'm falling to pieces.

How did the night ever get like this?

It didn't take long to be released from the hospital, as my injuries healed quicker than expected. During my stay, Marinette had visited every day with a different pastry. It only made it harder for me, since I knew I had failed her and didn't want her to hate me anymore. How could I face a girl I had failed so many times?

During the night, she would come visit as Ladybug, only causing my heart to sink more. When she was Ladybug, she sounded a little more confident than before. Her stuttering would dull down but a slight blush, her fidgeting and constant movement in her legs told me she was still nervous. It made me smile but killed me on the inside.

When I saw her like this, it made me want to embrace her, let my Chat out and take her hand and kiss it…. to kiss her. But then I would remember her blood soaked face, her weak smile, her deathly dull eyes… and all feelings would flutter away just as quick as they came.

During the stay, I had learned that my transformation was knocked off because of my ring. It had come loose and Plagg retrieved it for me. He was rewarded for that of course, but it didn't change the fact that I wasn't even careful during that fight. If my ring got knocked off like that…. The thought only darkened in my mind.

"Hey dude, what's on your mind?" I turned my gaze towards Nino. He gave me a small reassuring smile. "If it's your dad again…" I shook my head. "No I just… I failed…." I fell silent as Marinette walked into the classroom. "You failed….?" Nino repeated, motioning with his hand for me to continue.

I continued to start at Marinette as she made her way towards her seat. However she stopped right in front of me, leaning down to be eye level with me as she smiled. There was a faint tinge of color on her cheeks as she smiled at me. She placed down a small box in front of me, still smiling. "What…." The look she gave me cut off my question. Her eyes told me 'if you think being out of the hospital will stop the daily pastries, you are wrong.'

They say bad things happen for a reason

I couldn't help the laugh. I couldn't help it as I covered my eyes as tears started to fall. Marinette was Ladybug… and Ladybug was Marinette. Both were one in the same… and both were sweet, kind, brave and strong. I stood up from my seat, saying that I needed a moment, causing concern in Marinette.

I walked towards the locker room, heading to wash my face in the men's bathroom.

"Adrien!" I stopped, turning to see Marinette running up to me. "W…was it something I did?" She asked, pointing to my tears. I shook my head, smiling. "No, more of something I did… but don't worry about it." The frown didn't match her at all…

"Adrien… do you… do you still blame yourself? I told you I was fine! Or… or is it because I'm…." She trailed off, looking away. I placed my hand on her shoulder, giving her the best smile I could despite my pain I felt. "It's not because of you, Marinette… I just, I messed up and there is nothing I can do that would fix things." Her frown only grew more as she got an angry look on her face.

'Cause she's moved on while I'm still grieving

"What do you mean you messed up? There was nothing you could have done! What… do… argh!" My eyes grew wide as she gripped onto my shoulders and pulled me down closer to her, glaring into my eyes. "There is nothing you have to fix! You are…. I mean…" She let out a soft sigh before softening her features. "I can't even explain it…" she muttered before once again, keeping a very strong gaze on me.

I stared at her as she tried to explain everything but cut herself short each time. Now I'm tryna make sense of what little remains.

"Marinette… I'm sorry." I gave her a weak smile, cutting her off completely as I turned away from her. I could hear her calling out to me as I walked away. I'm falling to pieces.

"You idiot, now what will she think?" I ignored Plagg. I ignored the tears that burned my eyes, the tears that rolled down my face. But I couldn't ignore the image of Marinette staring up at me, covered in blood, telling me that everything would be alright, when she wasn't alright.

What am I gonna do when the best part of me was always you?

"I said listen to me!" I turned and glared at Plagg. I was holding one of my trophies, getting ready to throw it at him. "How do you think she feels?! Every time you work together, there you go, throwing yourself in front of an attack and taking the hit! What if this was reverse? What if it was you who was covered in blood because you protected her? What if this was all her in your place? Do you think she would act like this? NO! So how do you think she feels, when you are avoiding her and she doesn't even know that you are Chat Noir!"

I turned my gaze away, knowing full well that Plagg had a point. Marinette forgave me years ago for what happened between us… What am I supposed to say when I'm all choked up and you're ok?

"God you are stubborn! I feel like I am trying to talk to your father. Pretty sure he would listen quicker than you would." I glared at Plagg before sighing. "I don't know how to face her Plagg… not only does my mind return to her injured state, but then I recall those times when someone made a comment about her having a crush on someone… I've lost her twice."

One still in love while the other one's leaving.

"Dude… you're falling to pieces. Just man up already. Heck, give me cheese, and I will let you Chat Noir it up for however long you want. Cats honor that I won't break the transformation prematurely!" I turned my gaze away. I heard a sigh before my vision was blocked by glowing green orbs.

"Adrien, I've lived for thousands of years. Ladybug can't live without Chat Noir, and Chat Noir can't do things without Ladybug. We have enemies beyond Hawkmoth. You saw how things went with that Egyptian dude. Ladybug was nearly sacrificed over something that happened 5,000 years ago. If you won't listen to me as an old partner… then listen to me as a friend… Marinette needs you."

Now I'm tryna make sense of what little remains… "Plagg…" He shook his head, denying me from any rights to decline him. "Don't you think I've lost enough Chat Noirs in my life time? Don't you think Tikki has lost enough Ladybugs that it gives her nightmares? As much as you guys think we chose you… it was you who chose us. You needed the help, and we needed your friendship. You needed an escape, I was your escape."

"Then what did Marinette need?" I asked. "You."

My heart skipped a beat. "Don't you remember how she had no confidence in herself? Don't you remember how she put herself down? You gave her the confidence she needed to be Ladybug."

I didn't need Plagg to say anymore. A sudden surge of confidence filled me as I nodded. I transformed and made my way to her bakery. I knew she wasn't home yet as I had skipped class. So I sat patiently waiting on her balcony, staring down through the trap door. I could see her bed clearly.

The cat pillow on her bed only caused a smile to form on my face. From just her bed alone, it reminded me so much of Marinette. How had I not observed such a cute trait of hers the last time I was here? Was it because my mind was more on playing a game with my classmate? Was it because I was afraid that I would upset her? Was it because my mind wandered?

My ears twitched, causing me to lean down closer to the trap door to see someone climbing through the door in the floor. I watched as they walked over to the lounge couch, dropping their bag on the floor, before falling face first into the couch. Plagg was right… we really did need to talk.

However the fear in my heart only caused me to want to run away. How was I going to face her when she didn't even know that her own classmate that she visited in the hospital was actually her partner?

My eyes grew wide as I slipped; causing noise that gained her attention. "Chat?"

I swallowed hard before waving to her through the trapped door. I watched as she climbed off the chair towards the stairs before opening the door for me to climb in. I jumped down, landing next to her. I looked around her room, feeling a warmth surge through my body.

"What are you doing here, Chat?" My gaze met hers. "I uh…" I fell silent. This gained her attention. "Are you alright? Is something eating away at you?" She reached up to my hair, petting it slightly. I froze up slightly before leaning into her touch. "Sorry for barging in on you, princess. You're the only person I know that wouldn't freak out from Chat Noir…. I mean…." Wow words, thanks for failing me.

"Oh so…. It's something you can't talk to Ladybug about?" I turned my gaze slightly towards her before turning it towards the wall opposing us. How could I tell her I was Chat Noir and that I knew she was Ladybug? I had all that confidence before I came here, but now it was gone. It was like seeing her zapped away everything.

Before I could say anything, a buzz went off. My gaze turned down to the lounge chair where Marinette's phone laid. She went to climb around me to go down the stairs. I shook my head before making my way down. "Let me get it…" I simply said, knowing it would be better.

I lifted up her phone and stared at who messaged her. I turned around, holding up the phone. I froze however as I was about to say it was a message from Alya when I noticed what was all over her wall under her bed. It was pictures of Adrien Agreste… pictures of me. In a normal instance I would believe that she was just a fan of my father's work, but her wallpaper on her computer told me that it was a little more than just being a fan.

My gaze shifted up to Marinette, who was now leaning slightly over the side of her bed, staring down at me with big, curious eyes. I gulped, trying to get rid of the lump in my throat as I stared at her.

"Princess… tell me, why did you look so sad when you came into your room?" Her eyes grew wide with shock before she closed them tight. "I… I think I just lost someone… He found out a deep secret of mine… to which I got hurt because of this secret and he blames himself for it. I've tried to comfort him, tell him none of this was his fault… but he… he…" Her face lowered more.

My gaze turned back to the pictures before back to her. "So was it this boy, the one you have all over your wall?" She shot up, jumping down from her bed to try and hide all the pictures. I let out a small laugh. "D-don't tease me!" She squeaked out, her cheeks slowly turning red. "Princess, don't you think it's a little too late to hide those?" I said through my laughing. She glared at me before dropping the pictures on her desk.

"Yeah well I bet you have pictures of Ladybug all over your bedroom!" She pouted, crossing her arms over her chest with a huff. I shook my head, a grin on my face. "On the contrary, I have more books than anything in my room." I walked closer to her before leaning down slightly. "Plus, to be fair… It's the girl behind the mask that I love, not just Ladybug." I froze up at my own words. I stared straight into Marinette's eyes. She quickly turned her gaze away, grabbing her phone from my hand as if trying to use that as an excuse to avoid our conversation.

When I heard the tapping on her phone, I turned my attention to the photos she had placed on the desk. I remembered each photo, only causing me to frown. My eyes roamed around her desk, noticing small things that she had related to me; my schedule and my photos.

"So…. You like this boy?" I asked, turning my gaze toward Marinette as she let out a small 'eep' before dropping her phone.

"S-so!" she pouted again, before turning towards me. "P-please don't tell him!" I stared at her, my heart fluttering and falling all the same.

You got his heart and my heart and none of the pain.

††††AN††††

It took me a bit to do this one… only because I kept changing which song I wanted to do. See I just recently found out that the list she gave me was double sided and then I found all these other songs and I was like "WELL CRAP! THIS COULD HAVE BEEN CHAPTER 2!" So before I had put up chapter 3, I looked over all the songs and found "Breakeven" on the list.

Though I'm starting to think you guys would have wanted the other chapter…. For…. Fluff reasons… but not while Adrien is angst, I won't allow it! yet.

I decided to start posting these chapters onto Tumblr. I'm posting them under daemonded-art
To which I have no idea why I chose that as my name for that account… I did dddmind for my main, so it's not like daemondedevil was taken hahaha!

-Ja ne