Team Universe

Legionnaire, Boggie445, Guest, RebeccaGloom:

Nghhh!...Errrrgh!...Aaaarh!...Hmpf-!

*drops huge-ass chapter in front of mass of reviewers*

Haa…haaaa…haaaaaa…This good enough? *takes long drink of cold water to clear head*

Okay! Well, sorry about the super-long break, more details on that at the bottom, but I have a super-sized chapter to make up for it! Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I own none of the characters or locations portrayed in this work; all characters and concepts belong to their original owners. Cover art belongs to the amazing Ace Florins.

Now loading… epsd_catfingers

Scout whistled to himself as he rode the Fortress's elevator, scribbling into one of the spare disguise kits he and Amethyst had pilfered from Spy a week or so ago. Ha, Frenchie thought he could handle Scout when he was alone, but damn it was really easy to get him to cave once Amethyst came along and the two double-teamed him. Scout sniggered to nobody in particular. Heh, that's probably the only double-team the French tart would ever see.

Why, yes Pearl routinely called him immature and crude, why do you ask?

"Aaaand, done." Scout mumbled to himself as he finished his drawing on the kit with a flourish. He tucked the stylus back into the tin and pressed the blue button underneath his drawing. There was a brief hiss as the device churned up a cloud of pink smoke around Scout, completely obscuring him from view. A second later the Bostonian looked down at himself.

Much shorter stature, far more body mass than he was used to, a pink t-shirt with a familiar yellow star…everything checks out. Scout hit a second button on the disguise kit and the screen he had just been writing on morphed into a mirror. Thick, black-brown bushy hair, big, child-like eyes, upturned nose…yup, there was no mistaking it. As of right now, Scout was a spitting image of Steven Universe. Part 1 of operation Steven Tag was officially completed.

"Sweet!" Scout said in Steven's voice, but with his own distinctive accent. The smart-ass face that Steven's face was wearing disappeared after a moment, "Er…I mean…" Scout-Steven stumbled as he tried to morph his face into a more familiar, starry-eyed look of wonder, "Awesome!"

Scout-Steven checked his reflection in the kit again and frowned. For some reason, every kit he and Amethyst had made since failed to replicate the way Steven's eyes turned all starry when he was amazed. It irked the Bostonian to no end that there was a flaw in the disguise, they had to be as lifelike as possible in order for their game to work!

The runner huffed in frustration before shrugging Steven's shoulders, "Eh, I'll figure it out later." 'Man, Steven talking with my accent is really weird.' Scout thought to himself as he hit a red button on the device, causing his current holographic disguise to evaporate. After only a brief moment, Scout was back to looking like his normal self again. Lucky too as the elevator had finally arrived at his destination with a distinctive ping. Tucking both his hands and the disguise kit into his pockets, Scout resumed his whistling as he strolled through the elevator doors and down the exit hallway. Taking only a moment to punch in his exit code, Scout stepped out into the beach house.

"WOMP WOMP!"

And straight into some sort of Pearl-shaming shtick, apparently, if the light purple Pearl with an amethyst embedded into her chest taunting the normal, white Pearl was any sort of indication. Especially considering that the former was presenting her butt (or lack thereof) to the latter as she proceeded to slap it. Let it not be said that Pearl was exceedingly narcissistic, or perhaps not even slightly, as the alabaster Gem didn't even spend a millisecond examining what she looked like from the rear.

Or maybe she always knew exactly how she looked from every possible angle at all times. Scout still had no idea how exactly Gems choose a form to adopt, but in his defense that was because he really couldn't care one way or the other. Besides, Amethyst usually just 'did' what she did with little to no explanation as to how, and that was when she could be bothered to even answer those questions.

Either way, Scout was not about to let such an excellent set-up go unassisted. With a devious grin Scout withdrew the disguise kit and cycled through a series of pre-recorded images before selecting one.

The not-so-silent sound of a holographic disguise phasing into existence managed to catch the attention of Pearl, Purple-Pearl, and Steven (who had gone unnoticed by Scout up until now). When the smoke dissipated, Amethyst-as it was clearly her who had shape-shifted into a facsimile of Pearl-and Steven tried to hold in their giggles when a third Pearl walked towards them with 'her' head held high and her eyes closed. Pearl narrowed her eyes at Not-Pearl as 'she' crossed the room.

"Now, Pearl," Not-Pearl chastised Purple-Pearl, 'her' hands held out as 'she' stuck a dainty-looking pose that was only slightly ruined by Not-Pearl's poor attempt at masking 'her' Boston accent, "Kindly cease your ministrations at once. It is rather unbecoming for one of our stature to be caught smacking our rump in such a crude fashion, even if we technically have no real 'rump' to speak of."

Pearl flushed blue and looked at the floor as Purple-Pearl started laughing uproariously. Steven-too young to really understand the second part of the joke-giggled along as well. Purple-Pearl quickly got her chuckles under control before she straightened up and struck a similar pose to Not-Pearl, complete with the raised chin and spread-out arms.

"Yes, of course Pearl. You must forgive me, I've merely been a bit stressed lately because…" Purple-Pearl's eyes opened only slightly to give Not-Pearl a knowing look, "…that rude Scout has been making a mess everywhere he goes. And his language," Purple-Pearl held a hand to her forehead, "While I do so enjoy nothing more than cleaning up even the simplest of messes, he's been getting quite out of hand!"

Not-Pearl's mouth twitched before 'she' managed to get it under control, "Why of course I forgive you, Pearl. It's quite understandable that you might feel a bit crazy. In fact, I myself have my own little troublemaker to deal with as well. She's been driving me absolutely mad!"

"Oh, really?" Purple-Pearl's eyes flitted over to where Pearl stood, arms crossed and fuming, and over to Steven, giggling furiously, "And who is she, may I ask?"

"You know, that messy Amethyst," Not-Pearl smirked, "She eats such strange human foods, and some things that aren't even considered food by humans! She's been leaving such sick presents around the house, and stores food in only the ghastliest of places!"

Purple-Pearl snorted, "Ghastliest?"

"Shut up, it's a word. Ahem," Not-Pearl cleared 'her' throat, "Anyways, just dealing with her alone has driven me into a tizzy! Why, I have no idea how I'm going to calm down after dealing with such a character…"

"Indeed, to act in such a barbaric and immature manner, it's simply unthinkable!" Purple-Pearl agreed with a nod of her head.

For a few seconds, the only sound was Steven struggling to breathe as he and Pearl stared at the two fake Pearls standing daintily in the center of the room. Then Not-Pearl and Purple-Pearl both shared a knowing look before they turned to Pearl.

Well, they turned a very specific part of their anatomy towards Pearl.

"WOMP WOMP!" "WOMP WOMP!"

That was the last straw for the one authentic Pearl in the room, "Ugh!" She cried aloud to no one in particular, face flushed almost completely blue. Pearl marched past her two doppelgangers and endured yet another round of 'womp'-ing from the duo as she fled the house, slamming the door behind her. Once she was gone, Not-Pearl and Purple-Pearl both collapsed into fits of laughter alongside Steven, who took slightly less pleasure at seeing Pearl so flustered.

"Oh, man!" Not-Pearl chuckled, not bothering to hide her accent now as 'she' wiped a tear from 'her' eye, "That was beautiful. I ain't even kiddin' here, that was nothin' short of amazin'."

"Ohmygosh did you see her face?" Purple-Pearl cackled, "Absolutely priceless!" The shapeshifted Amethyst finally pulled herself to her feet with a little difficulty, shaking off the last few giggles of her laughing fit. Purple-Pearl turned to her compatriot and gave 'her' a wicked smile, "You could not have come in at a better time!"

"Hehehe…you guys really got her good!" Steven laughed for a little longer. His expression then turned pensive as he looked out the door where Pearl had fled, "…You guys don't think she's actually upset, do you?"

Not-Pearl blew a raspberry, "Puh-lease, Pearl likes to act all offended and disgusted and like she's above it all, but she just keeps shruggin' it off and comes back for more. She's some kinda masochist that way…"

"She did get us back a couple times over the years, though," Purple-Pearl admitted, sounding unusually appreciative of the pale Gem, "Even if she did need some help from Spy or Engie sometimes. So I guess she really isn't as 'above it all' as she says she is." The shapeshifted Gem finished, making air quotes at the appropriate times. This earned a rueful "Ha!" from Not-Pearl as 'she' pulled out the disguise kit 'she' held and pressed a button, disengaging the current illusion. Purple-Pearl soon followed suit as her body changed into a mote of light and shrunk down into the more familiar shape of Amethyst's base form. A Second later and all the color returned to her body.

"So anyways," Scout looked over Steven and Amethyst as he spun the closed disguise kit around on his finger, "What're the two a' ya's doin' up here that ya had to shape-shift into Pearl for it?"

"Amethyst is teaching me how to shapeshift like a real Gem!" Steven said, his eyes sparkling like stars, belying his concealed excitement at being able to change his body on a whim, "It's gonna be awesome when I can shapeshift into a huge lion!"

"Oh, really?" Scout said, giving Amethyst an appraising look. Shape-shifting was one of the Gems' powers that Scout found pretty interesting. Even Spy's own disguises were limited to simple holographic images overlaid on top of the user's own form and balanced out with voice modulators to better mimic the voice of the person one is imitating. This was a pale comparison when considering that the Gems' could change any part of their body that they wish to with very little limitations, "And what exactly made ya wanna do that now?"

"Steven was out with Engie helping fix the mayor's car or something," Amethyst interjected as she gave the half-Gem a wry grin, "I just happened to be nearby and thought it'd be fun to…mess with 'em for a bit."

"She turned into a cat and stole Engineer's wrench!" Steven elaborated, sounding much more excited than he had a moment ago.

Scout snorted, "Yeah, that'd really get under his skin. That thing's like his lucky charm or somethin'. And lemme guess, once ya starting changing shape hardhat peeled out real quick, didn't he?"

Amethyst smiled a wide, shit-eating grin, "You know it!"

Everyone knew about Engineer's particular phobia regarding people being able to change their appearance. Sniper had a similar, if less visceral, fear himself. This was completely rational if one were too look at the two's experience during the Gravel Wars of course; both were very high priority targets for enemy Spies. And since the enemy boasted the same disguising technology that Team Fortress's own Spy did, it was very common to find out that ally Scout or Soldier or Demoman wasn't exactly on their side after they had buried a knife into your spine and sapped all of your hard-earned buildings. Of course, these were all just illusions-holographical disguises that broke down if interacted with too much. However, the Gems were able to completely restructure their physical form with only the slightest amount of effort. Shape-shifting too often or remaining in a different form for too long was tiring, but that hardly mattered to Engineer. As far as he was concerned, if you weren't looking like yourself, that meant you were a Spy, and if you were a Spy, you were the enemy.

Of course Engineer's reactions were no longer quite so volatile as they had been in the past, and he was far less likely to pull a gun and scream 'SPY!' at the top of his lungs every time one of the Gems shape-shifted in front of him, but it still made the Texan incredibly uncomfortable. A fact that Amethyst was far too willing to poke fun of.

"As soon as Steven asked me to teach him how to start shape-shifting, Engie immediately told us to give him some space for his 'work', ha!" Amethyst barked ruefully, "He just doesn't wanna be around when I start showing Steven how to do this," Amethyst's body turned luminescent once again as her body contorted into a different form. A second later and Scout was sniggering at a purple, effeminate Engineer with a large amethyst embedded in 'his' chest, "Gottam'ove dat gear up!" Purple-Engineer said with a horribly fake Texan accent.

Scout and Steven both laughed as Amethyst returned to normal, "Oh, yeah, I could see that totally getting to hardhat. Especially with the eye shadow," Scout stopped for a second as something occurred to him, "Hey, why do ya shape-shift eye shadow whenever ya turn into one a' us? Ya' don't normally look like you're wearing it."

"Uh, because it's funny?" Amethyst explained while she shrugged, "It makes all of you guys uncomfortable seeing yourselves wearing makeup."

"That is a thing that is true." Scout admitted.

Steven picked that moment to step in, "So Amethyst, can you show me how to change into a cat like you? Or wait-wait! How about you show me how to turn into a huge lion! No, even better! How about a huge dragon!" The half-Gem's eyes continued to grow wider and wider as he grew even more excited with every passing moment.

"Actually…" Amethyst interrupted as she walked over to Steven, "For once, Pearl got something right. If you're gonna start changing your body around, you're gonna need to start off with something easy. Don't wanna overdo it on your first try, believe me it ain't exactly the greatest feeling when you mess up shape-shifting the first time," Wow, it felt really weird to actually assume responsibility for once, "Your first idea about turning into a cat doesn't sound half bad. It's small, easy to picture, and I have pretty good experience with that," The short Gem turned to Scout, "You wanna stick around or d'you got somewhere to be?"

Scout shrugged, "Nowhere in particular, hope ya don't mind if I stick around for this. It sounds pretty cool even if I can't do it." The Bostonian walked over to a nearby support and leaned against it, making sure to keep an eye on Amethyst and Steven over in the kitchen.

Amethyst nodded to her partner before turning back to Steven, "Alright Ste-man, just follow my lead, okay?" When the half-Gem nodded with his characteristic eagerness, Amethyst started her lesson. She raised her arms up to the sides of her head and closed her eyes.

"First things first, you gotta think about what you wanna be. This is really important, cuz if you don't have a really clear image of what you wanna shift into, you might mess it up. Shape, weight or physical details could end up all over the place if you don't focus."

"But you shape-shift all the time, and really quickly too," Steven pointed out, "And you sometimes add things to your forms, like the makeup and stuff."

"Well that's cuz I've gotten a ton of practice with this shape-shifting business. You could say I'm an old pro at it," Amethyst gave Scout a well-intentioned glare when the runner snorted at her comment, "The first few times you shift you gotta make sure you get all the little things right. Once you start shape-shifting more regularly, you'll be able to do it as easily as I do. Practice makes perfect, right?"

"Okay…right," Steven said as he adopted Amethyst's pose, "Picture what I wanna be…cat. Furry. Big ears. Small…" The half-Gem starting going through several important physical features about cats out loud.

"Alright then, once you've got a clear picture in your head about your next form, all you gotta do is…shake it out!" The purple Gem started jiving a bit in place, shaking her arms and bobbing up and down. After a moment her body dissolved into light and shrunk to the size of, well, a cat! A moment more and the light disappeared, revealing a small, bushy, purple-gray cat with an amethyst in her chest. Cat-methyst padded over to Steven and looked up at the boy with her large, human-like eyes, "See? Ha! Easy. Now your turn."

"Uh, okay. Right. Easy." Steven muttered in an uneasy tone. Seeing how effortlessly Amethyst had changed her form intimidated him more than he'd admit. Steven looked over to Scout, who gave the boy an encouraging grin and a thumbs-up.

"No pressure, little dude!" The Bostonian said, "Just give it a try."

Steven nodded and closed his eyes, visualizing a cat in his mind's eye. He then starting flexing every muscle he knew he could at once. This of course put him under so much stress and strain the boy started sweating profusely and tearing up, "Caaaaaaaaaaat…" Steven chanted under his breath as he continued to put himself under too much stress.

Amethyst and Scout looked on with a degree of concern, though they quickly forgot this once the humor of the situation kicked in, "Hey, um…might wanna be a little more careful there kid, you don't wanna poop yourself, ya'know?" The Bostonian chuckled a bit to himself.

"Scout's right, Steven," Cat-methyst added as she sat back and opened a bag of chips, somehow without opposable thumbs, but she gets away with it because she is technically a magical shape-shifter, "You're being way too tense about this. Trying to force a change isn't going to work. Just relax and feel it," The purple Gem said as she started snacking on some potato chips, not even bothering to close her mouth while she chewed, "Bio-rhythms, yo."

If anything, these statements only served to make Steven even more tense. The half-Gem pressed his fingers to his temples as he tried to 'feel it', even going so far as to draw out the word like he had when he was chanting 'cat' a few seconds ago. Amethyst and Scout shared a worried look.

"Uh…Steven, if you're not ready, we can try this later, y'know?" Cat-methyst said as she stalked over to the half-Gem, "Shape-shifting is pretty difficult when you first start out. You don't gotta rush this."

"No, wait! I can do it!" Steven shouted suddenly, startling both mercenary and Gem. The boy released all of the tension in his body at once and closed his eyes, "Uh! Yeah, feeeeel it!" Steven mumbled to himself as she started moving his body in rhythmic, shaking motions, almost like a dance.

Scout and Amethyst stood transfixed as Steven got his tension under control. The purple Gem even subconsciously shifted back into her base form while still on all fours.

"Ha!" Steven huffed out as he thrusted his arms forward, willing his body to change shape.

He remained in that position for several seconds even after it became apparent that nothing was going to happen. Scout looked to Amethyst with a quirked eyebrow. The Gem just shrugged and got to her feet before walking over to Steven.

"Well, it was a pretty good try for your first time," She admitted with a smile, trying to cheer up the half-Gem, "You're probably gonna need some more practice before you start shape-shifting for real."

"Mew."

The unexpected mewling of a cat surprised everyone present, even Steven himself. Cautiously the young boy held out his right hand, which had been balled up into a fist at some point, and extended his index finger. This caused the trio to jump once again because instead of a pink-skinned, normal appendage, Steven's finger had changed into a white-furred cat head.

"No friggin' way…" Scout said as he tried and failed to suppress the fit of sniggering he was having upon witnessing the cat-finger move around under its own will. Amethyst seemed to be suffering from a similar fit of laughs as well, though the purple Gem did nothing to suppress them.

Steven, however, was so amazed as his accomplishment that his eyes filled with their familiar stars, "This. Is. So. Coooool!" The young boy cheered excitedly as he watched the cat head mewl and move around. He reached down with his other hand and began petting the cat with a single digit, "Hey there little guy…" Steven crooned. The cat finger apparently liked this petting as it leaned-as best it could-into Steven's ministrations, purring all the while.

"Oh man," Amethyst said as she came down from her fit of uproarious laughter and took a breath she really didn't need, "Steven, you need to go show Engie this. He'll totally freak out!"

"Oh my God, yes," Scout exclaimed and he walked over to Steven and crouched down to the half-Gem's level, setting his hands on the boy's shoulders in order to grab his attention. When Steven looked up into the Bostonian's eyes, he noticed that they seemed to sparkle with some kind of shine-almost as if he discovered his purpose in life. Glancing over, the half-Gem noticed that Amethyst's eyes had a very similar sparkle as well. He turned back when Scout started speaking, "Steven, this absolutely has to happen. My life will not be complete until I see hardhat's face when he sees this."

At that point, fate seemed to smile on Scout and Amethyst, as Engineer burst into the beach house that very moment. The Texan's face was buried in his ever-present tablet as he typed away on the device. This of course allowed Scout to straighten up and block Steven from view and gave Amethyst just enough time to look slightly less criminal. Engineer finally looked up from his tablet after a few seconds of quietly mumbling to himself, "Scout? Great, you're already here. Listen-we got a bit of an emergency to deal with at Badwater Basin-"

"Ah-ah, before ya go any further," Scout interrupted with a smug grin as he stepped away from Steven, exposing him to the Texan, "Steven here has a little somethin' he wants to show ya'."

Steven stepped forward when Engineer turned his gaze to him and held out his hand which had the shape-shifted finger, "Check it out! I was able to shape-shift my finger into a cat! Like a…cat-finger!"

"Mrrrow!" The cat-finger meowed happily in support.

Steven's eyes sparkled in pride and happiness as Engineer stared at his hand. The sparkles began to slowly fade when Steven realized that Engineer wasn't reacting to his attempt at shape-shifting at all. The Texan was staring expressionlessly at the cheery cat-finger as it bobbed happily on the end of Steven's hand. Scout and Amethyst stood off to the side; both somehow managing to control their respective fits of laughter for the time being.

Silence reigned in the house for several more seconds, only being broken by the intermittent meows of Steven's cat finger and muffled giggles from Scout and Amethyst, until Engineer finally managed to react.

"Nope," The Texan declared as she straightened up. To Steven's amazement, after Engineer made his declaration, the Texan somehow managed to extend his neck at least an inch longer. Then he started marching towards the Fortress's entrance with a purpose in his step, "Nope. Nah. Heck no." He chanted as he continued towards the door. Engineer entered his access code in a rigid, robotic fashion, and entered the Fortress once the door had opened. Without so much as a look back Engineer shut the door behind him. The trio in the kitchen could still faintly hear Engineer's many iterations of 'no' for a few seconds before his voice finally tapered off.

Scout and Amethyst collapsed to the floor in side-splitting laughter once Engineer had finally stepped out of earshot. Scout held his ribs and pounded the floor while Amethyst merely fell to the ground and started rolling back and forth along the wooden floor.

"Ah, ha HAAA! That was EVERYTHING I hoped it would be!" Scout said through his laughing stitches, somehow wincing and laughing at the same time, "Oh man my sides…"

"I-I can't! I just can't!" Amethyst managed to wheeze out between chuckles. The purple Gem looked to her compatriot with a pleading gaze, "Please tell me you got that on camera. This moment needs to be commemorated."

"I didn't, no," Scout admitted before turning to Amethyst with a wide grin, "But it sure as heck was caught on the security cams!"

"Alright!" Amethyst cheered as she and Scout shared a high-five, "We need to share this moment with everyone."

Steven, meanwhile, was nowhere near as ecstatic as the duo. In fact the half-Gem looked rather dejected as he stared at the entrance to the Fortress. Apparently feeding off of Steven's emotions somewhat, his little cat-finger appeared to be in a similar state of upset-its tiny ears folded flat against its head.

"Aw man…" Steven said, his voice tinged with disappointment, "He didn't like it…"

"Ey, don't take it personally, squirt," Scout said as he walked over to Steven and bumped the boy's shoulder, "Hardhat really just doesn't like shape-shiftin' stuff all that much. Makes him feel like someone's gonna creep up behind him and start throwing sappers on all his buildings. Heck, if it was me who had to deal with all those Spies back in the day, I'd prolly have some sorta complex too."

"Yeaaaah…" Amethyst drawled as she stepped over, munching on the bag of chips she opened earlier, "It took him a while to get used to us being able to shape-shift regularly, and it still weirds him out. Don't worry about it though, Ste-man," The purple Gem said as she smacked the boy's back just a tad harder than what would've been appropriate, "He'll come around eventually. 'Sides, you just changed your finger-Engie'll get over that pretty soon."

Steven stumbled slightly as he tried to regain his footing from Amethyst's 'love tap', as she called them. He turned to the two others in the house and gave them a hopeful look, "Really?"

"Ab-so-lutely, kid," Scout said smugly as he popped open a can of (non-radioactive) soda he had retrieved from the fridge, "Have we ever lead you wrong?"

"Don't answer that question," Amethyst said drolly when Steven opened his mouth to reply. The boy dutifully shut his mouth and lowered his raised hand. After a few moments of silence, Amethyst quirked a brow at Steven, "So, you gonna just stand here all day and not show everyone your new trick like you said you wanted to or-?" The short Gem let the end of the question hang in the air as she stuffed another handful of chips into her maw.

This managed to snap Steven out of his mopey trance, "Oh!" Steven's eyes lit up and he clenched his fists in determination, "Right, right, I almost forgot!" The half-Gem turns and starts jogging to the door outside, holding his cat-finger out in front of him. Just before he leaves the house Steven looks back to the duo still at the counter, "Bye guys! Thanks for helping me with shapeshifting Amethyst!"

"No prob, kiddo! Go nuts!" Amethyst replied with a wide grin.

"See ya later, little man!" Scout says, raising his can of soda.

Steven returned one of his blindingly cheerful smiles before jogging out the door, holding his hand out in front of him and presenting his shapeshifted finger for all to see. Soon the half-Gem had disappeared behind the cliff. Several seconds passed in relative silence as Scout and Amethyst each enjoyed their respective snacks. Eventually Scout turned to the purple Gem beside him, "How bad d'you think Pearl's gonna freak when she sees what Steven did?" He asked between sips of his soft drink.

"HA!" Amethyst laughed, spraying chip crumbs everywhere without a care as to where they landed. She in turn gave Scout an evil smile of her own, "Please; I can't wait to see how Medic will react to this! He'll probably try to dissect Steven just to figure out how he managed to shapeshift a living cat head onto his finger."

Scout chuckled aloud, "Oh, ya can bet he's gonna try. Pearl and Engie'll stop him though. Heck, if they fail Garnet'll just put him through another wall like the first time he tried something like that."

"Probably. It's kinda impressive-how hard Doc is to kill, I mean," Amethyst smirked and poked the Bostonian in the arm, "Even by 'squishy organic' standards."

Scout darted out of the way of Amethyst's next jab, "Laugh it up, shorty, unlike you I can actually move my ass fast enough to dodge half the shit that's coming at me. Ya just stand there and take it."

"Like a BAWS." Amethyst rebutted, sticking her tongue out and raising her free hand up into the air-making the rock star sign.

Scout facepalmed, though this was mostly just to hide the good-natured grin, "Jesus, I should have never introduced you to the internet. I knew this would come back to bite me in the ass."

Amethyst's head turned to white light as she started shapeshifting again. When the light disappeared, Amethyst's entire face had morphed into some sort of grotesque, semi-openmouthed grin with dozens of skin wrinkles. Her eyes had tightened up into pinpricks and were filled with vicious mirth.

"U mad, bro?"

Scout gave her a disapproving look at the shameless display, "That is not even remotely acceptable in this context."

Before Amethyst could offer another rebuttal of the trollish fashion, an obnoxious siren started to emanate from Scout's pant pocket. Disgruntled, Scout reached in and withdrew his cellphone-whose screen was flashing a bright red.

"EMERGENCY. EMERGENCY." A synthesized voice declared in monotone from the phone's speakers, "CALL TO ARMS FOR ALL TEAM FORTRESS MEMEBERS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL. REPEAT. THIS IS NOT A-"

"Shut the hell up ya stupid piece of crap!" Scout cried as he punched in his password and shut off the automatic alarm. Even once it had quieted down the Bostonian continued to glower at the device, "Dumbass program keeping me from turning down the freakin' alarm on this thing. God damn…"

"Yo, what's up?" Amethyst said as she clambered up onto the counter to look over Scout's shoulder at his phone. Luckily she had changed her face back to normal before doing so, "Some kinda Gray invasion? Any Gem monsters attacking your old facilities? Is Merasmus getting uppity again?"

"The first thing," Scout answered as he looked at the emergency message on his phone, "Looks like good old metal-head is tearing up our storage down at Badwater Basin. Jackass is probably looking for more Australium or somethin' if he ain't going for one of your places."

"Sweet, dude," Amethyst said with a vicious grin, "I'm always up for breaking some 'bots." The purple Gem cracked her knuckles menacingly-somehow managing to do so without the presence of air in her nonexistent joints.

"Don't you guys need to go fight an island or something today?"

Amethyst stopped for a moment, processing Scout's statement. Then she seemed to deflate in disappointment, "Aw crap, you're right," She sighed, "And I was actually getting excited to start breaking stuff today. Why you gotta ruin my fun like that, man?"

"Because I am an unrepentant asshat, that's why," Scout replied matter-of-factly, "And don't you go complainin' about not getting to fight robots today, you're probably gonna fuse and start beating up an entire island. That's freakin' badass."

"Hehe, yeah…" Amethyst grinned as she imagined the impending smackdown later that day, "It's gonna be epic. Still; breaking robots is more fun. 'Specially since it basically screws with Gray too. I hate that guy."

"We all do," Scout agreed as he put his phone away. The Bostonian pushed off the counter he had been leaning on and stretched out, sighing as his joints popped and cracked, "Welp, gotta go get ready to break some shit. Catch ya later tonight, Amy."

"See ya!" Amythest said as Scout made his way over to the teleporter in the back of the house and activated it, "Remember to beat a Heavy's head in for me!"

"I'll use the pan for it, too!" Scout smirked and tipped his hat at the purple Gem. A second later he dissolved into particles of red energy and disappeared. Amethyst merely laid back against the column next to the counter and continued to snack on the chips she had popped open.

A few seconds later, Sniper walked into the beach house from outside. The Australian seemed to be troubled by something as he continued to stare out the screen door even after it had snapped back shut. Amethyst took no heed of the Bushman's worried state when she addressed him.

"Hey there Snipes, did you get Engie's emergency call too?"

Sniper looked at Amethyst as if he had just realized that she was there, "Oh, uh…yeah actually. I was just coming by to get ready to go…" Slowly the sharpshooter's gaze narrowed as he continued to look at Amethyst, as if he was coming to a realization, "Oi, Amethyst…"

"Ye-es?" The purple Gem responded, stretching out the word and trying to appear as innocent as possible. Unfortunately, Amethyst was terrible at looking innocent. A fact that Sniper was well aware of.

"You wouldn't have anything to do with how Steven somehow managed to shapeshift a living, self-aware cat head onto his finger, now would you?" The marksman asked.

Amethyst laughed. Then she remembered that she had an audience, "Um…would you believe me if I said no?"

Sniper just sighed and walked over to the teleporter, "Just make sure this doesn't become a problem then, otherwise it's gonna be you I'm pointing Pearl to, got it?"

"Hmmm…sounds fair."

Several hours later…

Badwater Basin was in absolute chaos.

That meant that everything was business as usual.

Gray's forces had taken up residence in BLU's old half of the battleground-thankfully it had been emptied of any Mann Co. technology decades ago-and were dead set on pushing forwards to Team Fortress's defensive position on the map, which was, coincidentally, RED's old half of the field. Unlike the old BLU facilities, the aging RED structure had been kept in relatively good shape over the years. Part of that had to do with the fact that it was a spare storage space for excess Australium and doubled as a testing ground for some of Team Fortress's new hybrid Mann-Gem technology. The other part had to do with the fact that Team Fortress simply liked the color red a bit more than blue.

I mean, if you had to fight hundreds of your doubles to the death day in and day out, and they were wearing specially-colored clothing, you would probably develop an aversion to said color.

In any case, the old RED base had several new features to boast about. Chief among them were automatic defenses and a very Gray-sensitive detection scanner to boot. While Team Fortress was prepping to head out to the field, their automated defenses were able to slow down Gray's attacking force until they arrived. Once they had, a very vicious game of tug-of-war began to play out between the two factions to see who could get to their enemy's base faster. Team Fortress was hard-pressed to keep the enemy away from their facilities; they were making progress-albeit slow and uneven-but progress nonetheless. Currently, they had Gray's forces pushed all the way back to the very start of the map-but the robots weren't about to go down without a fight.

"EXECUTING RALLYING CRY: PUSH FORWARD YOU MAGGOTS! PUSH LIKE YOU MEAN IT-"

*shink*

"AUUUUUUGH!"

"Oh, shut up!"

Spy shot the floundering Greater Soldierbot in the head before disappearing into a puff of smoke, leaving no evidence of his presence beyond a broken robot. This of course didn't keep the lesser Soldierbots from firing wildly around, trying to kill the French espionage expert. Needless to say, this kept them distracted from the frontlines for a good while. So intent on killing Spy were they that they didn't notice the next threat moving towards them until he started revving his minigun.

"YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Heavy screamed as he pelted the group of robots with hundreds of bullets, killing several instantly. On each of his sides a teammate stood-Demoman on his right and Pyro on his left-each also firing into the horde of robots. Pyro's new and improved Scorch Shot setting the very ground the machines walked on into fire. Demoman's grenades wreaked havoc on the tightly-grouped Soldiers. The Soldiers tried to return fire once they realized that they were dying horribly, but Pyro simply dashed in front of its teammates and whipped out its flamethrower. One airblast later, and the Soldierbots were all trying to escape the barrage of rockets that suddenly turned on them. There were no survivors.

Further behind the Soldiers, a Giant Heavybot suddenly turned its attention away from Engineer's nearby Sentry and starting firing on the trio. They returned fire to the robot even as they retreated behind the cover of an outcropping of rock. Heavy winced as he touched some of the ragged holes in his flesh left behind by the giant's weapon. Luckily, Demo and Pyro were mostly unscathed. There were some perks to being a bullet sponge, anyway.

That didn't mean that Heavy relished the sensation of multiple slugs in his organs. Heavy raised his head and bellowed, "MEDIC!"

"Ja, Ja, I'm here," The German said as he dashed over to their little spot of cover, narrowly avoiding a few bullets himself. Medic turned his medigun on his allies, quickly patching up Demoman and Pyro before letting the beam linger on Heavy for a bit longer. The Russian sighed as his wounds closed shut and the bullets in his body were pushed out by his regenerating mass. A healthy sheen of deep red wreathed Heavy's body, making it clear that the Russian had been overhealed.

"Thank you," Heavy said to the doctor, with Demoman and Pyro offering their appreciation as well, "Was almost worried for a moment."

Medic snorted, "As if. You've survived much vorse zhan zhis-ve all have."

"True," Demoman admitted as he fired a volley of grenades over their cover, "But that doesn't mean we like dealin' with dis." The Scotsman grinned wickedly as a series of synthetic cries of pain split the air as his bombs detonated. A grin that swiftly disappeared when the steady mechanical steps of the Giant Heavybot grew louder, "What in the bloody 'ell is Sniper waiting for on tha' Heavy? He's wide open!"

"I'm taking down enemy Snipers before they zero in on your arses!" The Australian's indignant voice crackled over the team's communicators, causing many of the others to burst into chuckles, "I think they're a bit more annoying since they're out of your reach! Excuse me for thinking that you bloody idiots can handle one measly Giant!" A loud crack split the air and the Giant Heavy's head exploded into scrap from the force of Sniper's shot. The behemoth crashed against the ground in a heap and remained there, "WANKER!" Sniper's voice yelled not through the comms, but rather out loud.

Demoman smirked, "Thanks lad! Ye need any help clearing out the cliffs over there?"

"Truckie, Solly and Scout got that mostly covered," And indeed, at that moment there was a rather loud and obnoxious cry of "BONK!" followed by an equally obnoxious series of clanging sounds as Scout beat his adversary's head in with a frying pan, "And the Spook is keeping most of the bigger 'bots on edge. Actually, they seem to be pulling back now. Think we're just about finished up here-oi, wait a minute…" Sniper's voice grew quiet for a moment, causing the quartet behind the rocks to grow wary. A few seconds later and Sniper swore into the comms, "Bloody hell, they've got a Captain Punch with giant Medic support. Where the hell were they even keeping that monster?" A second crack split the air and the deep voice of a Giant Medic cried out in pain.

"Ach…" Medic groaned in unison with his three patients. Captain Punch was annoying enough to put down on his own with heavy ballistic armor and troublesome regeneration; with additional Medic support he'd be a real treat to deal with. Mind you, not impossible, just rather difficult, "Vell, at least I have an ubercharge ready for zhis," He said before triggering his communicator, "Ve're heading over right now. Just hold on until zhen."

"No prob, doc!" Scout's voice chimed in, "We got this!"

"That's what you said about Gem monster in Hellfire," Heavy grumbled over the comms, "Didn't work out so well that time."

"Hey! I made an honest mistake; anybody else would've done the same."

"Scout, I still have no idea how you thought a bloody bottle of milk would be the monster's one weakness," Sniper said dryly, "It was pretty obvious that the bugger only lit itself on fire by accident, not that it was part of its main body. If you ask me, you deserved to take a little lava bath after that stupidity."

"Says the guy who throws piss at his enemies!"

"It works when I do it!"

Engineer sighed as he listened to his two teammates start a pissing contest over the communicators-as if they didn't have enough to deal with already. The Texan gave his Bulletstorm Sentry a friendly whack with his wrench to help the machine reload its weapons. Aside from a few hiccups involving some sneaky little Spies, his buildings had thus far remained unmolested. Mostly in part to the support from his team, and Engineer wasn't about to take all the credit for himself.

The boys were doing pretty well in this fight; so far nobody had taken any serious wounds, let alone died. Scout, Soldier and Spy were doing their best to keep the horde of robots distracted from Engineer and Sniper as the two poured down hell into the miasma of machines below. Engie's Sentry was making quick work of the grouped enemies, while Sniper was picking off the larger robots easily and enemy sharpshooters easily. The Australian had actually set up near Engineer's Dispenser, allowing him an endless well of ammunition for his weapon.

That's not to say the three were only distracting the enemy, however. Scout darted to and fro, blasting any enemies that were close enough to kill in one or two shots before jumping back out again. The Bostonian also whacked one of the larger robots over the head with his pan from time to time, stunning the machines. Soldier fired rocket barrage after rocket barrage, taking chunks out of the robot's ranks while he floated relatively safe through the air. He would periodically drop down and bury his hovel in the mechanical brains of his foes before lifting off again into the air, scrapping any unfortunate robots that had gathered near him while he had been on the ground. Spy, in his true asshat nature, waited until the perfect time before plunging his knife into the backs of his unsuspecting robotic adversaries, killing them instantly. Dumb as they were, the robots took a while to actually notice that something was wrong, and by the time they did return fire Spy had already disappeared to do it all again or tossed one of his area of effect sappers onto one of them and left them easy pickings for his team.

All in all, this defense of Badwater was going better than expected-hundreds of robots broken and little in means of personal damage. Guess lady luck had finally given Team Fortress the break it so dearly deserved.

Of course, that train of thought came to a screeching halt when a ringtone came in through Engineer's comminucator-the device doubling as a REDtooth earpiece. Making sure that his team was in position to fight Captain Punch, Engineer took only a moment before answering the call, which his caller ID recognized as from Pearl's phone.

"Hel-"

"Engineer!" Pearl's frantic voice cried through the earpiece, making Engineer wince slightly at the volume, "We have a problem!"

Engineer idly noticed that in the background he could hear the familiar hum of the Gem Sloop 2's engine, a speedboat direct upgrade to the Gems' old Gem Sloop 1 which was a simple sailboat. Engineer had no idea how they were supposed to get anything done in a timely matter with only a sailboat as transport, so he and Pearl had constructed a larger, faster version. It could carry all twelve of their team with some extra room to spare for guns and ammo.

The Texan shook his head out of memory lane before answering Pearl, "Uh…can't you gals deal with this problem on your own? I mean, we're kinda in the middle of something at Badwater."

'In the middle' being a pretty gross understatement, given how Heavy-while ubercharged-was bearing down on his mechanical giant doppelganger with murderous intent. Everyone else was preoccupied with killing off Captain Punch's remaining three giant Medics before they ubercharged. Engineer's Sentry was whittling down the megabot's armor bit by bit, only changing targets to eliminate a flanking Scoutbot, Pyrobot, or flying Demobot. They could ill afford any distractions now.

"I know, I know, but this is important," Pearl said over the phone, sounding genuinely distressed that she had to bother the mercenaries with this, "It's about Steven."

Well that certainly changed things, didn't it? Engineer didn't even think for half a moment before coming to his next conclusion, "Hold on, I'm patching this through the rest of the guys." Pearl dutifully remained quiet while Engineer opened the channel to the rest of the team's communicators.

"Oi truckie, why'd you open the channel?" Sniper said as he felt the communicator in his ear buzz with the distinctive sound that preceded the addition of someone to the network. He really didn't want to deal with another problem right now, he had just taken down another of the Giant Medics protecting Captain Punch, "Something the matter?"

"Fellas, we got a problem with Steven," Engineer answered, causing all eight of the other mercenaries to tense up in agitation, "Pearl's got the details."

"Alright," The alabaster Gem began, taking a breath to help calm her nerves, "Just before we left to take care of the island monster, Steven came up to our boat, trying to get in. Only he couldn't touch the water because…well, because he had shapeshifted his all of his fingers into hydrophobic cats!"

Silence reigned through the channel as everyone tried to absorb this information. Heavy was not so distracted, though, that he couldn't throw a backhanded punch over his shoulder, killing the cloaked Spybot that had been sneaking up on him, "What?" The giant said into the comms, unsure if he had heard correctly. Even so, Heavy continued to fire at one of Captain Punch's Medic companions until the 'bot had been torn to shreds.

"Uh-oh…" Scout mumbled aloud, "That ain't supposed to happen."

"Did you know about this, Scout?!" Pearl cried, causing the mercenaries to flinch from the sudden increase in volume, "Why didn't you tell any of us about this?!"

"I didn't know he'd change all of his fingers into cats!" Scout tried to defend himself, "Wow that's gotta be one of the weirdest things I've ever said…anyways, the last time I saw the kid he only managed to shapeshift one of his fingers into a cat! No biggie, just a cute little cat-head on his finger!"

"No biggie-?" Pearl said, sounding utterly baffled, "No biggie?! This isn't a normal shapeshift; Steven managed to create autonomous life using only his body! Do you have any idea of the consequences of an autonomous shapeshift? If Steven can't get his morphs under control, they could take control of his entire body!"

"Fascinating." Medic whispered over the comms, already thinking about the possibilities of such an ability.

Heavy spared a sidelong glance at the German-his intent clear without any words.

Medic blanched, "Er…I mean…how terrible?" He tried, somehow managing to force his care for Steven's wellbeing ahead of his need to learn how to create autonomous life himself.

Demoman launched a volley of grenades alongside a rain of Soldier's rockets, causing the third and final Giant Medic to disappear in a black cloud of smoke. When the smoke dissipated, only scraps remained.

Sniper grumbled as he lined up his next shot at Captain Punch's head-the robot too preoccupied with trying to pound Scout to protect itself, "Bloody hell, I told Amethyst not to let this become a bloody problem!" A loud crack and the sudden jerk of the Captain's head signified a perfect hit.

"I knew it!" Pearl screamed at someone in the background before turning all of her attention back to the call she was making, "In any case, Steven needs to be kept calm and his…cat fingers need to be controlled before this blossoms into a real problem. I really hate to ask this, but since our mission is time sensitive we can't divert our attention now. Is there any way for some of you to go check on Steven for a little while?"

"Just give us a few minutes Pearl, we've almost got this licked," Engineer said as he pulled out his wrangler, giving his Sentry a shield and increasing its firing rate, "Then we'll send some of us home to make sure Steven stays calm. Don't worry about it."

Pearl released a breath she hadn't realized she had been holding, "Right, thank you for this Engineer. Sorry to cut this short, but we've almost arrived at our destination. Good luck with the rest of your fight!"

"Same to you," Engineer replied before terminating the call and turning all of his attention back to the bossbot moving through the area. It certainly looked much worse for wear, but it kept trucking forward all the same, swiping at any of the mercenaries that got too close. It moved too slowly at one point and allowed Spy to toss a sapper onto its rear. Much like Major Bomber, the device failed to completely shut down the behemoth, but it certainly slowed it down. Things seemed to be wrapping up pretty nicely after all, Engineer thought as he set down his wrangler and returned to whacking his Sentry.

The Texan tried very much not to imagine that he was pounding Scout's face with every heavy blow he landed. It wasn't working very well.

A few minutes later…

In the end, three mercenaries were selected to return back to the beach house and look after Steven while the rest remained behind on standby in case some of the robots weren't as dead as they would've liked. Luckily they could also get a head start on salvaging what remained of their mechanical adversaries and repairing the defenses the robots had damaged or destroyed. To that end, Scout, Sniper and Medic were selected (volunteered) to go back home. Scout because the merc had actually been around when Steven first shapeshifted and might be a stabilizing presence even if he had no idea how to reverse the process. Sniper because he was the only one aside from Engineer and Scout who actually witnessed the cat-finger as Steven called it (and no matter what Engineer wasn't about to head back home and see his surrogate son get progressively more like a sneaky little backstabber nope nope nope) and was arguably one the best among the mercenaries when it came to keeping their calm. And Medic joined because the doctor had dealt with more than a few horrific mutations and may know a way to reverse it using a brand of his own insane biomedical science.

Hey, if all else fails Medic could just cut the shape-shifted flesh out of Steven's body like annoying tumors and regrow it to its normal look using his medigun, but that was a last resort. Even Medic had qualms about mentally scarring Steven by tearing his own body up in front of him.

Of course, open-heart surgery to add an uber-heart transplant wasn't part of that deal; something that Medic tried to stress to the rest of his team but their moral alignment rebelled against such an idea. Seeing your own innards was somehow less traumatizing than seeing one's own arm or leg lopped off at the joint.

Again, not that the mercenaries would know anything about traumatizing events-given that they were all basically insane to begin with-but it was the thought that counted.

At any rate, the trio of mercenaries made their way back to the teleporter at the old RED base, eager to get home and help Steven in his time of need. Though…one may have been more eager for different reasons, of course.

"Can you imagine? Autonomous growths on a living body! Completely independent of the body's main brain and neural netvork! Able to have its own likes and dislikes, no matter how harmful they may be to zhe host! Zhe implications behind such a discovery is astounding! Even I have never managed to perfect zhe creation of an autonomous growth on a previously single-minded body!"

Scout pinched the bridge of his nose in annoyance as he listened to Medic fangirl over Steven's affliction; he could deal with being forced to help Steven out with his shapeshifting problem, he had kind of been an enabler after all, but suffering through Medic's completely insensitive commentary on the wayside was just unfair. It didn't help at all that Sniper was simply choosing to ignore the good doctor, and rebutting any attempts Scout made towards conversation, so Scout couldn't distract himself.

Eventually, Scout had finally had enough when the group moved through the automatic sliding door leading to the main structure of the RED base.

"Of course, zhe problem vith autonomous growths is zhe fact zhat zhey may in fact rebel against zhe body's decisions in favor of zheir own…hmmm…perhaps I could create some sort of inhibiter to remove zhe growths if zhey become too troublesome-"

"Alright, Doc, can ya cut the chatter?" Scout snaps as he turns his head to the German, not ceasing his pace in the slightest and catching Medic off guard, "I'm sure this is really super interesting and everythin' to ya with what ya do and all, but we're headin' home to help Steven get rid of these things, not ogle him like one of your weird-ass mutations!" Scout cut off his rant only to type the teleporter's passcode into his wristpad.

Medic sniffed; he appeared to be somewhat offended by Scout's words, "Vell, you don't have to be so combative about it," He complained as he pushed his glasses back up onto his face, "Steven's vellbeing is of course our primary concern. I was merely contemplating zhe future experiments I could conduct in zhe wake of zhis discovery. I vould never even consider using Steven in one of my studies."

"Then stop talking about this stuff when we get to the house then, mate," Sniper spoke up, looking through his sunglasses at the doctor, "In case you've forgotten, we're supposed to keep Steven calm. And I'm certain you're aware of how terrifying your speeches on experiments can get."

Medic's expression became thoughtful as he considered what Sniper had said-apparently he had failed to even think about the effects his musings might have on innocent and impressionable Steven. Then the moment passed, and Medic straightened up and cleared his throat, "Right. Yes. Of course."

"Great, 'cuz our ride just arrived." Scout announced as the teleporter on the floor lit up and started rotating. Without further ado, the trio hopped atop the device and waited for it to charge up fully. When it did they dissolved into particles of red energy and disappeared, only to reappear a picosecond later at the beach house. Almost immediately they caught sight of Steven on the floor by the front window.

Now, one must remember that Team Fortress had seen a lot of things over the years. From ancient, magic cursed eyeballs to horribly mutated bread monsters to hordes of their own undead corpses to the eldritch horrors that the corrupt Gems had somehow mutated into. Considering this, there was not much that could faze them anymore. This went doubly so for Medic, who created Cronenbergs in his laboratory on a regular basis just because he could.

So it's saying a lot when the three mercenaries visibly recoiled when they caught sight of Steven's body-Medic included.

"Guys! You came back!"

"Gaah!"

"Aaugh!"

"JESUS-! AH SHI-!" Scout tripped over his own legs from backing up too quickly and crashed to the crystalline floor on his back. He swiftly rose to his feet and stared in horror at the half-Gem, "Kid what the fuck happened to ya?!"

He knew that he would suffer the wrath of Pearl later for using such language in front of Steven, but right now the Bostonian couldn't really care less. Steven's form was something straight out of one of H.R. Giger's nightmares. His right hand and foot had both been replaced with huge cat heads that were constantly mewling some sort of horrific cacophony. The fingers on his left hand were all miniature cat heads as well, and he had a tumor-esque cat face sprouting from his forehead. Lower down on his body, two cat heads had sprouted: one on top of Steven's right thigh and another a bit higher on his torso. Each and every cat was mewling and wailing in some kind of sick chorus known only to them.

Steven eyes were full of unshed tears-he looked absolutely terrified, and he a right to do so, "I-I dunno! I just changed the rest of my fingers into cats at the fry shop but then…I just lost control!" The half-Gem struggled to his feet, supporting himself on the nearby couch by the windowsill. Apparently his newly acquired cat-foot didn't take kindly to this and hissed wildly, causing Steven to fall flat on his face with a cry of surprise.

This was apparently enough to shock the mercenaries out of their shock as all three of them rushed to Steven's side, "Flip him over and support his back! Quickly!" Medic barked out, taking whatever charge of the situation he could. Scout and Sniper did as asked and each kneeled by one of Steven's sides. As gently as possible they flipped the child over, only to flinch in surprise once again when they saw that another cat head had blossomed into existence on Steven's forehead, and yet one more on his stomach-for what good it did, the cats appeared to avoid Steven's gem.

"Mein gott…" Medic whispered as Steven's vitals appeared on his glasses' heads-up-display, "Steven, vhen did zhese mutations start occurring?" The doctor asked as he took Steven's cat-arm in his grasp and scrutinized the feline that had grafted itself in place of Steven's hand. The cat was displeased with this treatment and hissed at the German, only to receive a firm, but not painful, slap on its snout.

Steven-now being supported by Sniper and Scout looked fearful as he answered, "J-just a minute ago, maybe?"

"Alright…" Medic set down Steven's arm and moved down to the cat that had replaced his foot, "And vhat vere you doing at zhe time zhat may have aggravated zhe cats?"

"I was just trying to get them to change back to my normal fingers, but it just made things even worse!" Steven wailed, "I didn't want more of them to start popping up! I swear!" In defiance of his words, another cat popped into existence on his left shoulder, mewling and hissing at Scout. The Bostonian reflexively punched the cat in the face, earning a pained mewl from the feline and a cry from Steven.

"Oh God!" Scout said when he realized what he did, "Shit, I'm sorry!"

Steven sniffed, "It's okay...you're just trying to help…" He said weakly as he gave an equally pathetic smile. Scout just felt worse due to this.

Medic-having been mumbling incoherently to himself in German for the past few moments-suddenly nodded and set down Steven's cat-foot, "I've got good news. Zhese constructs are too unstable-magically and biologically-to sustain zhemselves for very long vithout Steven's input," He gave Steven as gentle of a look as he possibly could, "Zhat means all you have to do is remain calm and not zhink about cats for a few moments."

Steven gave the doctor a pleading look, "A-and then I'll be back to normal?" When Medic answered with a firm nod, Steven leaned his head back slightly and closed his eyes, trying to get himself under control.

"Yes, just like zhat Steven. Keep your mind clear and your eyes closed." Medic said encouragingly.

Idly, Steven noticed that Scout's and Sniper's grips on him grew slightly tighter all of sudden, but he paid it no further attention. All he had to do to return to normal was remain calm and not think about cats at all. Sounds easy enough.

"Mew." "Rwooar." "Meeeewwl." "Mrrrrrowwww." "Arrrrowww."

Only it wasn't working in the least. Without opening his eyes to peek, Steven could tell that several new cats had just popped into existence on his body. The half-Gem writhed in his caretakers' grips, "I-I can't do it! They just won't stop meowing! I can't concentrate!"

"Steven, just hold still for a sec." Sniper assuaged the child, patting the boy's arm comfortingly while still retaining an iron grip.

But it did Steven little good, "No! I-I'm gonna be stuck like this forever! Half-Gem, half-human, half…cat…thing! I'll have to leave and join the carnival where all the other freaks live! Nobody but you guys will ever know I was once just a human boy! I won't be able to go on magic adventures anymore, or explore old fortresses! I'll never get to fight Gem monsters or robots either! And all because I overdid my shapeshifting like Amethyst said not t-OW!"

Just as suddenly as the pinching sensation hit his neck, it left, leaving only a sore area of skin and the rest of the cats yowling at the sudden spike of pain as evidence that it not been some sort of phantom sensation. Steven quickly opened his eyes to find Medic moving away from his face. In the doctor's hand was a rather large syringe-one that bore a striking resemblance to the one Medic frequently used on Soldier when the patriot got out of hand. The stopper was pressed about one-fourth of the way down the vial, leaving the syringe only mostly full of the whitish-clear fluid. Without another word, Medic tucked the syringe back into one of the pockets in his doctor's coat.

"Whu-" Steven tried to ask, but for some reason his tongue felt too heavy to form words and quit moving halfway into his first word. Now that he noticed it…his whole body seemed to be growing heavier by the second. Heck, even his vision was getting hazy…maybe he should take a nap now and when he woke up, things would be better? Yeah…a nap sounded good…Steven yawned once and promptly passed out into a dreamless sleep.

As Sniper and Scout watched, after Steven fell asleep, the cat-heads conked out as well, filling the air with the sound of kittens snoring. It'd have been pretty adorable, if the setting wasn't completely horrifying.

Sniper whipped his head to glare at Medic as the doctor examined Steven once again, "What the bloody hell was that about, doc?" He growled out, quietly, as to not perturb Steven or his cats.

"Heavy sedative," The German said absentmindedly as his hands ran over the tumor-like cats on Steven's forehead, "And his conscious mind is going to be completely unresponsive to any external stimuli for zhe next…oh let me see…two to zhree hours. So feel free to speak aloud."

Scout smiled sickeningly sweetly at Medic, "Okay, you got it doc," He said happily before taking a deep breath, "WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT ALL ABOUT?!"

Medic scowled at the Bostonian, who returned with a powerful grimace of his own, "Obviously, Steven vasn't going to be able to calm down before zhe situation became too dire. To zhat end I merely…gave him a helping hand."

"With a heavy sedative?" Sniper groused, looking almost as peeved as Scout, "You developed that stuff to put down Soldier when the bloke goes on a bloody rampage! Too much of it could kill one of us, let alone someone of Steven's size!"

"Steven has an advanced metabolism and immune system-likely due to zhe fact zhat he draws his very lifeforce from his mozher's gem-so he's actually fairly resistant to pharmaceuticals, no matter zheir make. Zhat aside, I used only one quarter of a full dosage to be on zhe safe side," Medic gave his two teammates a glare of his own, "Vhat kind of doctor do you take me for, anyvay?"

"The crazy kind." Scout mumbled.

Medic's glare turned dry as he stared at Scout, "Zhat is a given."

Sniper turned back to the mutant cat heads on Steven's body; they didn't show any particular signs of getting ready to change back, "Oi, doc, how long until these cats go away now that Steven's calmed down?"

"By allowing zhem to degenerate naturally?" Medic clarified Sniper's statement, "Steven should be back to normal vithin an hour or so."

"Didn't you say that if Steven ignored them they'd be gone in a few minutes?"

"Zhey vould have, if Steven had remained completely conscious for zhe duration. By sedating him I've slowed down all of his body's processes vastly. Zhis includes his innate ability to purge imperfections from his body," Medic prodded one of the cat heads on Steven's stomach, "Zhus, it will take longer for zhe cats to degenerate to normal flesh zhan it vould have before."

Scout frowned, "So…all we gotta do is just wait for a bit and Steven'll be back to normal?"

"Basically," Medic answered. The doctor continued to examine the out-of-control morphs for a moment before his eyes lit up, "Alzhough…" Medic turned to Sniper and quirked a brow at the Australian, "Didn't Pearl mention zhat zhese creatures vere hydrophobic?"

Sniper nodded, than blinked as something occurred to him. He set Steven down on the ground and stood up, making his way over to the nearby bathroom, "I'll draw a bath."

"Excellent," Medic said with a smile, "If ve let Steven soak in zhe water for a few minutes, his body should return to its normal state more quickly." The doctor stood up as well and moved to join Sniper.

Scout, still by Steven's side, removed his cap and wiped the sweat off of his brow, "Ah jeez, that was freakin' nuts man. Thank God we fixed this so quickly…"

"Oh! Zhat reminds me," Medic chimed up and he leaned out of the bathroom's doorframe, "Scout, you know zhe rule about swearing in front of Steven."

The Bostonian sighed-he had been hoping that Medic had forgotten his slip in the excitement, "Right right, yeah, a fiver in the jar and one of my hats to the collection, I know. Don't ride my ass about this, doc, ya' pumped the kid fulla drugs."

Medic disappeared into the bathroom, "I believe zhe fact zhat I saved Steven from a horrible mutation is more zhan enough to offset my actions here." He said, sounding confident in his accomplishments.

Unfortunately, Medic would be proven wrong hours later when the Gems and rest of the mercenaries returned home to find an unconscious (but cat-free) Steven laid out on the living room couch. Pearl had beaten him over the head with her spear for administering such a powerful anesthetic alone, and the rest of his team stood by and watched in amusement.

Don't worry though; Medic healed the slight skull fractures he had suffered within moments of receiving them. And when Steven awoke-after shaking off what remained of the sedative-he had downplayed his suffering with bad cat puns.

Everyone departed for their own quarters rather quickly after that.

Server Map Change initiated. Disconnecting from current map.

Retrieving server info…Sending client info…Connection established.

Now loading… spectator_stevenandconnie

"Is he gonna do it? I think he's talking to her right now…"

"Maybe, but I don't believe so. More likely he's trying to warm himself up before actually talking to this young lady."

"Heck, I'm gonna text the others about this either way. We've been waiting on this for a long time coming. Gotta make sure everything ready when it finally happens."

"I still think this is a bit of an invasion of Steven's privacy…maybe we shouldn't go through with this after all…"

"Is not invasion of privacy if we do not attempt to coax Steven in right direction. Merely…making sure things go smoothly."

"Besides, Garent'll pound us if we try to actually interfere here. Right, G?"

"Correct."

Pearl, Garnet, Amethyst, Scout, Spy and Heavy were looking out of the beach house's front window and down at the waterline. There, Steven sat on his propped-up bike as he attempted to initiate a conversation with a dark-haired Indian girl reading her book underneath the cliffs. The girl wore a set of large, pink-tinted glasses, indicating slight trouble with her vision. She wore a modest but nonetheless adorable white-and-seafoam-green dress and had a set of pink boots covering her feet. Aside from her clothing, however, little could be discerned from the young girl, as she seemed completely engrossed in her book-to the point where she wasn't even acknowledging Steven while the half-Gem attempted to talk to her. The girl had been making regular visits to the beach for the past two months, though she seemed less impressed with the atmosphere and more attentive to whatever book she was reading. The regular inhabitants of the beach house had thought nothing of her visits initially.

Steven, however, reacted differently. He appeared to be spending a not-insignificant amount of time observing the young lady and attempting to converse with her over the past several weeks. An amount of time that went not unnoticed by Spy's silent and ever-present vigil and Engineer's handy-dandy security cameras. Of course, once one of the mercenaries knew something, it eventually spread to the rest of their crew, Gems included, to the point where Steven's interest in the girl became an open secret among the city's protectors. Though they were careful to hide their knowledge of the situation in any way possible, lest Steven catch on to their charade. Most of the mercenaries and all of the Gems thought that Steven's crush on the girl was cute beyond belief, especially since the well-spoken, people-pleaser seemed to lose track of his own words whenever he spoke with her, or at least tried to speak with her. Spy and Sniper, however, didn't get where they were today without a hefty degree of caution and only just a hint of paranoia. So they set out to scope out this girl that Steven had taken an interest in.

"I still think that the personal profile you made on this girl and her family was a bit unwarranted," Pearl said to Spy, who was thumbing through a manila folder in his gloved grip. The alabaster Gem gave the espionage expert a cautious look, "It seemed a little far-fetched to expect that she was some sort of agent, or something."

"Gray once seriously considered using his only daughter to subvert control of Mann Co.," Spy replied as he snapped the folder shut, revealing it labeled with the name 'Connie Maheswaran' in bold red lettering. The Frenchman returned Pearl's look with one of his own, "Forgive me for expecting the worst in this situation. At any rate, it would've helped us to discover if this 'Connie's' parents had any criminal history whatsoever."

"And did they?" Pearl asked dryly, quirking a brow.

Spy moved his cigarette around in his mouth before answering, "No. Priyanka Maheswaran is a very accomplished surgeon at a nearby hospital, and her husband, Douglas Maheswaran is a private security guard. Both appear to be upstanding member of society and their backgrounds check out with no discrepancies."

"Hm," Pearl hummed with a smirk and superior look, "I thought so."

Spy narrowed his eyes, "I apologize for taking care with regards to a strange girl suddenly showing up near our base and drawing Steven's attention, despite returning none of it herself. Never forget our number one rule…"

"Everyone is a Spy." Scout, Heavy and Spy chorused, with Amethyst following only a beat behind. The short Gem was busy typing away into her phone, writing out a text message for those not present to see. A few moments after she sent it, a notification popped up and she smiled at the reply.

"Pyro and Engie are getting everything set up just in case we finally see some action today," Amethyst announced to the room at large, "And they're gathering everyone else in Engie's room. Man, I really hope Steven takes the plunge today…"

"Oh, oh wait!" Scout interrupted as he pressed himself against the glass to get a better vantage point, "I think something's happening! It-nevermind, Steven just fell off his bike. I gotta teach that kid how to balance. And now he's running up here."

Amethyst had just tucked her phone away when Steven burst through the front door, quickly shutting it behind him. The half-Gem took a moment to catch his breath and let his eyes wander. Steven froze when he realized he had an audience, but he quickly shifted into a confident pose, leaning against the screen door he had just ran through, "Whaddup?" Steven tried to sound casual and failed miserably.

Playing dumb to keep Steven in the dark, Spy looked to the young boy, "Who was that you were talking to down there?"

"Huh?" Steven said, trying to play dumb himself. Though the nervous sweat was kind of a giveaway, "What do you mean?"

Garnet crossed her arms over her chest, "That girl. The one reading that book."

"Yeah, you just dropped your bike down there. Don't pretend like ya don't know who we're talking about," Scout called over from his position leaning on the nearby wall, "We saw the whole thing."

"You did?!" Steven cried as his face flushed red. The half-Gem took a moment to compose himself before continuing, "She's just this girl I know. Except…she doesn't know me. We've never talked…"

"But you liiiiiiike heeeer~!" Amethyst drew the words out in a sing-song voice. The purple Gem walked up to Steven and smushed the boy's cheeks together, "Riiight~?"

"Mmf…I like everyone…" Steven says as he manages to push Amethyst's hands away from his face.

"Why have you not spoken with girl yet?" Heavy rumbles as he gives the boy a glance, "Are you nervous?" It was blatantly obvious that the boy was, but Steven being nervous was a very rare occasion. Heck, the kid didn't even bat an eye at the giant robot before rushing the thing to place the Moon Goddess Statue.

Steven avoided everyone's gazes for a moment, "Noooo…well, maybe just a little," He eventually admitted, much to everyone else's amusement, "But I'm just waiting for the right time to talk to her!"

Garnet gave the boy one of her gentle smiles, "You should wait until you're ready before talking to her."

"But I AM ready!" Steven claimed as stars danced in his eyes, "Today's the day! I just know it!" The boy's determination wavered for a moment when he saw everyone staring expectantly at him. Steven pointed a finger at them, "But you guys can't watch this time! It'll mess up my funky flow!"

"Funky flow?" Everyone but Garnet wondered aloud. Scout was the first to recover, as usual, and gave Steven a reassuring grin, "Alright kiddo, we won't watch your little date from up here."

"Great!" Steven said as he rushed to the freezer before suddenly stopping and rounding on the Bostonian, "And it's not a date!" He clarified before opening the freezer and reaching inside-careful to mind the piles of Cookie Cats inside. The half-Gem grabbed an orange, glowing bracelet from inside and jogged back to the door.

Amethyst, only half paying attention as she was preoccupied on her phone, looked up and quirked an eyebrow at Steven, "What's that?"

"Nothing!" Steven called back before running back outside, careful to close the door behind him.

Scout leans forward and peers out the window, watching Steven dash down the stairs. Once the boy was halfway down he jumped off of the wall and grabbed Pearl's and Spy's wrists in his grip, "C'mon! C'mon we gotta hurry or we'll miss it! Move it you two!" Scout started to drag the two towards the teleporter at the end of the room.

"Alright!" Pearl said as she wrenched her wrist from the Bostonian's grasp with a look of irritation, "There's no need for that, we're right behind you." A moment later Spy pulls his own wrist out of Scout's hold and spends a moment rotating his cuff while glaring at Scout.

As usual, Scout doesn't hear Pearl and ignores Spy's vicious looks. He busies himself by typing an access code into his wrist-mounted pad, "Amethyst, what's the word?"

"I just told Engie what's going on," She replies as she walks up with Garnet and Heavy, though she is still looking at her messages, "He's got everything set up and ready to go," The purple Gem tucks her phone into her bust and smile cheekily at her partner, "They've been waiting for this to finally happen too!"

"Perfect!" Scout says as the teleporter accepts his code and fires up, "Everyone get on! Hurry up!" The others in the room quickly comply with Scout's command and hop onto the teleporter with a bit of squeezing. There's a bright flash and they reappear inside of Engineer's stereotypical southern room. They're not the only ones there, too.

"'Ey! Ye made it!" Demo cheers as he looks over at the new arrivals from where he and the remaining mercenaries were gathered around Engineer's many-screened supercomputer. When he made his declaration, Soldier, Pyro, Medic and Sniper spared a glance behind them to wave or nod at the six who had just teleported in, "Come on over! We've got plenty of room!"

The Gems and three remaining mercenaries oblige Demo's request and walk over to gather around Engineer's computer, where the Texan himself was hard at work typing something into his console, "Hey there, fellas," Engineer said without looking back, "I've almost got this. Just a second more and-!" The many screens of Engineer's supercomputer flashed white for a second before they all linked together. Now onscreen was a wide-lens view of the beach beneath the cliffs. Coincidentally, this was where the Indian girl Connie was seated, and as the twelve watched, Steven moved into the picture, mumbling to himself and looking distinctly nervous.

Engineer grinned as the screens flickered on, "And we're in business!" He declares, much to the residents' joy.

Back when the mercenaries and Gems were discussing what kind of relationship Steven and Connie might have, it became very obvious that everyone wanted to be a bug on the wall during the two's first meeting. While Spy was the only one who had the skill to properly use a cloaking device, the others had a better solution-just use the security cams! Surprisingly, it had been Soldier who suggested the use of cameras for spying. He had been reminded of a very familiar situation he, Demo and Spy had pulled back in the 1960's to watch how Scout would handle a 'date' with Miss Pauling.

The evening had ended with fighting a giant homicidal bread monster, so in Soldier's humble opinion, it was a complete success. Most of the others would probably disagree with that particular notion, but Soldier never paid them much mind.

To that end Engineer had rigged his supercomputer up into an impromptu theater where everyone could watch Steven's meeting with Connie while not technically 'watching' him, really. Of course, not everyone was completely sold on this idea.

"Are you sure we should be doing this?" Pearl said as her eyes flickered to and from the screen, somehow unable to turn away fully yet unwilling to watch in its entirety, "Steven did ask us to not watch him…"

"We're not," Soldier pointed out, "We're just watching the camera that just so happens to be watching Steven."

Pearl gave the patriot a dry look, "Yes, well not all of us are completely guilt-free about the idea of spying on children."

"This is not spying!" Soldier declared adamantly, drowning out the speakers on Engie's computer, "We are gathering intel about a high-priority target! That is known as recon! Most certainly not spying!"

"Shush." Garnet shushed the two, giving them each a pointed glance. The bickering duo quickly clammed up and turned to watch the screen. Garnet likewise shifted her gaze to the computer. Normally, the tall Gem was all for the privacy of relationships and understood their sanctity. Of course, this was her Steven that was probably going to take his first steps into this without fully realizing the ramifications. The least they could do was watch over him while he made his own decisions-good and bad-without too much help from the outside. Oh, she was more than willing to lend Steven a hand in helping make 'friends' with this Connie girl, but only if Steven were to come out and ask her himself. Until he asked for explicit instruction, she would respect Steven's wishes to make his own decisions. And if the others would try to give advice when it was not wanted, well, Garnet would be there to keep them in line. So Garnet was fine with just watching and not interfering, at least for the time being.

'Besides', Garnet thought to herself with a slight smirk, 'This is pretty fun.'

On one end of the group, Scout popped two cans of soda and handed one off to Amethyst before turning his attention back to the screen. His purple-skinned friend gratefully accepted the drink and took a deep swig from the can. After a second she came up for air and let out a pleased sigh. She turned to Scout, "Going for the soft stuff?"

"Heck yeah," Scout said after finishing a drink of his own, "I ain't bringing out the hard soda; I need to be sober for this. It'll be much more cringe-worthy when I can actually make out what's goin' on."

"A fair point," Amethyst conceded as she finished off her drink and crumpled up the can into a ball. She tossed the malformed aluminum into her maw and, after a bit of teeth-grinding, swallowed the recyclable. The purple Gem held out an empty hand and made grasping motions with it, "Next one." Not even slightly off-put Scout tossed her another can, which she accepted gratefully before chugging once more.

"Alright, everyone!" Engineer said, turning the group's focus to him, "Here we go!" The Texan flicked on the speakers and turned off the lights in his room. Everyone quieted down and turned their complete attention to the screen.

"Hundred dollars says this gets interrupted by a monster attack." Sniper whispered to Spy.

The Frenchman chuckled and shook his head, "With the tremors we've been getting? Only a fool would take that bet."

Sniper shrugged, "Worth a shot at least."

As Steven walked along the rugged Cliffside, completely oblivious to the fact that he was being watched even at that moment, he continued to think of how he would go about introducing himself to the girl who had so far been completely ignorant of his existence. Not that that was anyone's fault but his own of course, but it still made deciding about his next course of action a bit more nerve-wracking than usual. And he usually had a knack for getting people on his side too! What did Garnet call it again…? Charisma! That was it.

'Okay, focus', Steven thought to himself as he took a breath, calming his nerves, 'All I have to do is go up and say hello. That's not hard, I've done it a million times!' The half-Gem's confidence flared up for a few moments, only to falter once more when Steven considered something else, 'But…maybe I should try to sound cooler…Spy always says how important first impressions are…' Steven's train of thought derailed as he noticed that he was getting awfully close to where the girl was sitting comfortably underneath the shade of the cliff face behind her. Like every other time he'd seen her, the girl seemed to be completely oblivious to Steven's existence. But that would swiftly change, if Steven had anything to say about it!

"Right!" Steven said aloud as he pounded his fist into his palm resolutely, ready for his plan of action, "Time to make a good first impression," The boy cleared his throat and started practicing the many ways he could introduce himself.

"Hi! My name is Steven," Hmmm…perhaps a bit too forward and excitable. Maybe a different tactic should work, "Hi, my name is Ste-ven," No no, that's putting too much emphasis on his name! That sounds too awkward, one more time, "Hi my name is…Stevan?" Where the heck did that even come from?

Before Steven could even begin to wonder what made him butcher his own name so badly, a loud roar drowned out almost all other sound. The earth began to shake violently beneath his feet. He wasn't the only one affect by this tremor, though. The dark-haired girl was also upset by the dramatic shifting of the earth. Luckily she was seated, and thus in very little danger of toppling over, so she would likely be fine.

That was what Steven had thought, until a viciously loud cracking sound split the air. The half-Gem's eyes flew upwards to the top of the rocky cliff, where a rather large slab of stone had broken away from the rest of the rock face. Now free, the rubble adhered to the laws of gravity and sped swiftly downwards to the sandy beach.

Right above where a certain bookish girl happened to be sitting, as disheveled as she was.

Steven gasped, horrified, and did the first thing that came to mind: he sprinted towards the girl with all the fury of a ballistic missile and tackled her to the ground, landing protectively over her.

"Hi, my name is Steven!" He panic-yelled at the girl, who's terrified expression only grew more frightened as she finally noticed the large shard of rock falling towards them. She covers her eyes and Steven, although he's already looking down, does the same.

Unbeknownst to either of them, Steven's Rose Quartz gem shined a brilliant pink as it recognized and resonated with Steven's fear and will to protect. The gem's glow grew incredibly intense for a moment, and then suddenly winked out. Though not without leaving something else in its place.

There was an earsplitting sound of heavy rock shattering as the fallen rubble met with an impregnable defense.

Silence reigned in Engineer's room as all twelve of the inhabitants stared at the screen in openmouthed shock. There, Steven stood protectively over Connie as he attempted to push the young girl out of harm's way. Instead of merely tackling her to the ground, however, Steven had done something rather unexpected in order to defend both Connie and himself from the falling rock. For encasing both of the children in its pink, transparent and deceptively strong shell was a very familiar looking bubble.

Namely, it was a dead-ringer for the very bubble Rose Quartz had used to protect herself and her allies on the fields of battle. Even the mercenaries recognized it on sight, all having enjoyed the pleasure of being shielded within the magical shell at least once or twice during their time with the Crystal Gems' leader.

Seeing Steven (unconsciously) summon his mother's bubble came completely unexpected to all who witnessed it. The Gems were all set to rush out and protect Steven from that falling slab of rock-interference in a budding relationship be damned before Steven's safety, Garnet said-with the mercenaries not far behind, but this new development simply caught everyone off-guard and had them fully mesmerized. Hell, Pearl wasn't even chastising Amethyst for spraying her mouthful of soda all across one of the lower screens from when the rock first fell.

Medic blinked for a few more seconds before gathering enough mental power to close his mouth. The German then slowly removed his glasses, polished them on the edge of his doctor's coat, and replaced them in their normal position. After a few more moments of looking at the screen with his cleaned specs and still seeing the same image, Medic pulled a needle out from the folds of his coat and jabbed Scout in the back with it.

"Ow!" Scout yelled, the sharp pain shocking him out of his trance. The Bostonian rubbed his sore back where Medic had stabbed him and turned on the German, fury in his eyes, "What the hell was that about?!"

"Just checking to see zhat I'm still in reality." Medic answered in a dreamy, almost wispy voice.

"Aren't you supposed to jab yourself if that's the case?" Scout snarked back at the doctor.

Medic took umbrage at this statement and refocused on the scrawny runner. He then proceeded to stab Scout multiple times with his needle until Scout finally managed to escape the doctor's wrath. Luckily the jabs from the small needle weren't particularly wounding, as the tool was mostly used to induce hurt rather than physical damage.

That didn't make getting stabbed in the back with a needle any less painful than normal, of course, as Scout continued to nurse the area where the doctor had poked him.

By this point, the other inhabitants of the room were escaping the grips of their shock as well. Scout's girly shriek of pain had certainly been very helpful in that department, at least. Pearl blinked slowly as her thoughts finally managed to get back on track after being so horribly derailed.

"Did…did Steven just summon Rose's bubble?" She asked uncertainly as she pointed at the screen, turning from side to side to gauge her friend's reactions, "Did that really just happen?"

"I think so…" Spy muttered as he too stared at the screen. The Frenchman turned to look at Engineer after a moment, "Laborer, is there any chance that this is merely a video error of some sort?"

The Texan typed a few commands into the console in front of him, causing the screen on the bottom-right corner of the array to shift into a diagnostic mode. Engineer pressed a few more keys on his keyboard and the machine spat out a digital page of information. The inventor scanned the document for a few seconds, "Uh…nope," He answered finally, "There's no problem with the hardware or software that I can detect. And, if these readings are any indication," Here Engineer pointed to a particular area of code on the screen, "Then that bubble is one-hundred percent magical in nature."

Silence was heavy in the room once more as everyone took a few moments and digested that information.

Then a series of ragged cheers split the air as the Gems and mercenaries professed their pride in Steven's newest accomplishment.

"Ha HA!" Heavy cheered as he pumped one of his huge fists into the air, "Steven is developing powers! This is great news!"

"Mhoo hoo hoo hoo!" Pyro giggles at it claps its hands excitedly.

"Bloody amazing!" Demoman laughed as he clapped his hands, "I knew the kid had it in 'im!"

"Heck yeah, Steve-o!" Amethyst whooped, throwing her half-full can of soda around wildly.

Pearl dodged the splashes of the sticky soft drink that escaped the can and frowned ruefully at the short Gem. She knew that this was a rather momentous occasion, indicative of Steven's growth as a Gem and a person, but that certainly didn't excuse the reckless celebration Amethyst and the mercenaries were participating in. Pearl's attention was quickly drawn back to the screens, however, when she saw Steven pushing at the walls of the bubble. The boy appeared to be attempting to either move the bubble or dispel it, Pearl wasn't entirely sure which. Steven then said something to Connie, who was also in the bubble, but no sound came through the speakers on the computer.

"Why can't we hear what they're saying?" Pearl asked Engineer, who was messing around with his console once again, "Is there something wrong with the audio system?"

"Hold on," The Texan mumbled as he peered at the readings on his diagnostic screen once again before returning to work on his console, "Trying to bypass the bubble's telemetry field so we can actually pick up some soundwaves from in there. Thing's blocking almost everything from getting in or out…"

"Are they in any danger?" Pearl asked worriedly as she stared at the two bubbled children, her words making the others in the room cautious as well, "Steven most likely can't fully control the bubble's field. If he wanted to protect this Connie girl but didn't specify any particular conditions, the bubble could be completely airtight!"

"I said the thing is blocking almost everything from getting in or out," Engineer clarified, setting Pearl and many of the mercenaries at ease, "Steven can't fully control the bubble yet, no doubt since he just summoned the thing, but his powers certainly wouldn't put him in a situation where he could potentially get hurt himself. He's still half-human, so he needs to breath like regular organics. So that means-"

"The bubble isn't completely airtight," Garnet finished stoically as she stared at the duo as they pushed the bubble around, "There has to be a way for fresh air to travel in and out of it. Otherwise they'd just start suffocating on CO2 when they used up all the pure air that was trapped in the bubble."

Engineer stopped typing at his keyboard and gave Garnet a cautious look for a few seconds at her admittedly blunt statement-he was joined by most of the others in his room a moment later, "Er…yeah, I was just about to say that. Maybe not in those exact words, though…" He trailed off as he continued to type commands into his console.

"Damn, G," Amethyst said as she gave the taller Gem a weird look, "That was kinda savage…"

"I'm not wrong." Garnet defended herself.

"But!" Engineer declared, drawing all attention to him once again, "That means I can find the arcane frequency the bubble is operating on and…" The Texan tapped a final key on his console and the speakers on his computer crackled to life once more.

"-dad works for a bunch of different beaches, so we're never in the same place long."

"Oh, that's kinda cool! I go on adventures with the Gems and the guys sometimes. They usually say it's too dangerous for me though."

Engineer smirked when the two voices-one masculine and familiar, one feminine and different-came through the speakers, even slightly distorted, "Bypass the field remotely by mimicking the same signal."

The mercenaries looked pleased that they had commentary to go along with their video once again, while the Gems seemed fairly impressed that Engineer managed to crack the secret behind Rose's bubble the way he did, "This…is incredible!" Pearl said, elated, only for her mood to evaporate a second later as she considered the implications behind this revelation, "But…couldn't you use this signal mimic to bypass the bubble's defenses completely and attack whoever is inside?"

"In theory? Probaby," Engineer admitted, though he was quick to counter his statement once the Gems grew panicked that one of Rose's primary means of defense was so easily subverted, "But it's not going to happen for a good long while, at least. I had trouble finding the one frequency that the bubble neglected to defend against, and I have this big ol' supercomputer here to help me with it. Even if Gray or whoever did figure out the bubble's weakness, he'd need to attune energy weapons to the signal first-projectile weapons don't have frequencies to change, so they'd be useless," Engineer waved a hand at the bubble on the screen once more, "Besides, the bubble's main purpose is defensive. If anything tried to pass through its field attempting to hurt whoever was inside, the bubble would shift frequencies to counter the intrusion, thus forcing any attackers to detect and alter arcane signals on the fly, or just eliminate them for a short time completely."

The Gems all visibly relaxed at this statement, and Pearl let out a relieved breath, "Good. For a second there, I was worried…" Pearl admitted.

"Magic's weird," Engineer said with a shrug (understatement of the century), "It kinda just makes up its own rules whenever it wants. The best I can do is try and trick it into thinking I'm benign, which, I obviously am, but that's beside the point. Anything else and I risk triggering some sort of defense that shifts the frequency of the bubble."

"Yeah yeah, that's great and all Truckie," Sniper said as he waved Engineer down, "Now shut your yap for a second, Steven's just rolled up to the house."

Everyone quiets down and turns to the screen once more, where Steven and Connie had indeed rolled their bubble up to the bottom of their home's wooden staircase. They looked as though they wanted to press on, but the staircase was simply too steep for them to roll up.

Steven seemed particularly disgruntled, "Awww, what?" He groaned when he realized his predicament. The half-Gem then turned his gaze upward to the main body of the house, "Hey guys! Garnet! Heavy! Help!", Steven cupped his hands over his mouth in an attempt to amplify his voice.

When no response was forthcoming, Connie turned to her partner in the bubble, "I don't think they can hear you."

Steven seemed to consider this for a moment, and then slapped himself in the face with an open palm, "Aawww…That's right. I told them not to watch…Oh, wait, maybe I can…" The young boy pulled his phone out from his pocket and pressed one of the numbers he had on speed dial. After a few seconds, Steven let out an agitated huff, "Darn it, no bars here…"

Connie scratched her chin in thought and looked back up to the wooden beach house, "We can just wait here until they come out."

"No, no no, it's okay!" Steven tried to assure his unwilling passenger, "I've got other friends that can help instead. C'mon!"

With that, the two began to roll away from the beach house and towards the town.

After a moment, everyone in Engineer's room looked at each other. Scout is the first one to speak up, "Sooo…does this count as some kinda emergency? Should we give them a hand?"

"Hmmm…" Garnet hummed to herself as she adjusted her shades, "Perhaps it would be best to allow Steven and Connie to try and work through this on their own. If Connie is going to be spending any time with Steven after this, she'll need to be prepared to deal with magical situations such as this."

Pearl nodded along with Garnet's words, "Very true. Additionally, as much as I would love to help Steven understand his new power, this is something that Steven will have to learn on his own how to control."

"Wow, Pearl," Amethyst said as she jabbed the Gem in question with her elbow, "I thought for sure you'd go full control-freak on this one."

The alabaster Gem sniffed, "Unlike some of us," She put extra emphasis on the 'us' just for posterity, "I know when I should leave well enough alone."

"Psh…" Scout huffed out as he whispered to Amethyst, "Wish she'd leave us alone more often."

The purple Gem laughed lightly, though she quickly quieted down when Pearl turned back to look at them. She held the two's gaze for a few more seconds before looking back to the screen.

" 'Ey," Demoman said as he watched the bubble and its two passengers slowly drift away from the Temple, "We ain't gonna lose the two if they go into town, are we?"

"Nah," Engineer said as he typed another command into his console, "We've got plenty of cams set up around the city just in case of an emergency. Just give me a second to find out where the two are headed…"

Twelve disgruntled faces watched as a tall, lanky teen in a Big Donut t-shirt laughed hysterically at Steven and Connie in their bubble while a second, shorter, teen attempted to break the pink shell holding them prisoner with a hammer. It was an exercise in futility; the mercenaries and Gems knew that the bubble could hold up against incredible force without showing so much as a scratch. What Sadie was doing was having about as much effect as spraying the bubble with a water gun. At least she was trying to help the two children to escape their predicament, which was more than what could be said for Lars.

"I hate that guy," Scout seethed as he stared menacingly at the hysteric teen, "Like, a lot. Why haven't we taught him a real lesson yet?" He asked the room at large.

"I tried to," Soldier grumbled, remembering the teen from previous experiences, "Maggot is quicker than he looks."

"And as I recall, you received a fine for disturbing the peace that day," Spy reminded the patriot, "You're lucky that's all you got-he could've stuck you on the charge of attempted assault."

"I wasn't going to hurt him!" Soldier protested. The looks he received from everyone in the room caused him to reword his statement to something a bit more truthful, "Permanently."

Spy rolled his eyes, "Regardless, we can't just go around assaulting anyone we want like we have in the past. We don't have the resources to cover something like this up."

"Also, we shouldn't terrorize that young human because it's morally reprehensible and ethically wrong?" Pearl said, gesturing for Spy to continue on with his statement.

"Right, that too, of course." The Frenchman said distractedly.

Pearl sighed in defeat.

"I dunno man," Amethyst said as she looked at Lars-still making fun of Steven and Connie-with an uncharacteristically thoughtful expression, "I could probably pass for a kid myself, ya'know."

"Amethyst…"

"It wouldn't be so weird for a teen to beat up someone their own age, right?"

"Amethyst."

"I'm just saying, it should be on the table, right?"

"Amethyst!"

"Okay…" Engineer sighed as he tried to tune out Pearl and Amethyst's bickering in the background and instead focused on where Steven and Connie might be going to next, "Moving swiftly on…"

"A harpoon gun? Is Steven crazy?!"

"He is child. Children make rash decisions."

"I'm pretty sure most children don't consider getting shot at by a rusty deep-sea spear, Heavy!"

"Most children are also not able to summon protective magical bubbles as well."

"…My point still stands."

"Guys, shut up I wanna see what happens here! Onion's lining up his shot, aaaaaaand…"

*swoosh**tink**CRASH*

"HA! AH HA HA HA HAAAAAAAAAA!"

"Well, that went about as well as any of us could've hoped. I really hope there weren't any people on that boat though…"

"Probably not, it doesn't look like it anyways. Hey Engie, how's our collateral looking so far?"

"Well, let's be generous and say about thirty dollars for the stool that Sadie broke on the bubble earlier. Counting the trawler that just got sunk…maybe set aside three-hundred, three-fifty k just to be careful."

"Alrighty, nothing too bad so far. Looks like we won't actually be breaking the bank this time. I just wonder where Steven's going to head next to try and pop this bubble."

"I dunno man, it's gonna be pretty hard to top this harpoon gun thing."

"Don't tempt fate, Amethyst."

"Aw, please. When are you guys gonna quit with this superstitious crap?"

"Okay, maybe this is getting a little out of hand…"

Amethyst reluctantly admitted as she watched Steven and Connie wheel themselves down Beach City Funland's boardwalk, heading straight for the kiddie coaster. Everyone was understandably unsettled by this.

"Ya think?" Scout almost shouted at the short Gem, "Jesus, if that bubble wasn't friggin' indestructible I think I'd be having a heart attack here."

"No you vouldn't," Medic assured the Bostonian without looking at him, "Your uber-heart transplant actually keeps cardiac arrest from occurring. Zhe most you vould suffer is some slight chest pains."

"Not helping!"

At the back of the group, a few individuals were having a minor dispute.

"Garnet, I'm fairly certain that this qualifies as an emergency," Pearl tried to implore the larger Gem without sounding too hysterical, "Steven is about to place himself in front of a moving vehicle. Even with the bubble protecting them, I don't think we should just let them be!"

"I'm siding wit' Pearl on this one," Demoman said as he stepped up, "This is getting too dangerous, not ta' mention Steven being somehow even more reckless than Soldier for some reason. If we're going to interfere at all, now would be the right time ta' do it!"

"Lttts gooooo!" Pyro mumbled as it shook a fist at Garnet.

But the ebony Gem stood resolute. She held out her hands in a placating gesture, "Listen, everything will work out for the best in the end. Despite appearances, there is actually a very small chance of Steven or Connie getting hurt here. If we were to interfere now, we could potentially do more harm than good."

Garnet's words did little to comfort those who still had their doubts, though they did back down from pressing the Gem any further. They turned their attention back to the screen when they heard Steven's voice once again.

"Alright, we just roll down this ramp as the carts are coming at us, and the crash will break us free!"

"…What happens after the bubble pops?" Connie's concerned voice asked.

"We'll be free!"

…

…

"Soldier, I am going to kill you." Pearl said in the most deadpan voice she could muster.

"This isn't my fault!" The rocketeer protests. A moment later he considers the idea a bit more thoroughly, "Though, I have to say I approve the plan. The logic seems very sound."

Engineer banged his head against his desk with an audible thump, "Oh God, Steven's been spending way too much time with you…he must have lost too many brain cells just from being in close proximity."

"Look-"

But Soldier would never get the chance to defend himself, for at that moment a tremor shook the very foundation of the Fortress. This caused anyone not currently seated to get thrown around a bit by the quakes. The Gems managed to recover fairly quickly, though the mercenaries took an extra moment.

Garnet pushed her way up to Engineer's seat at the front of the computer, "What's going on?"

"More tectonic disturbances," The Texan replied as he brought up another diagnostic screen, "But they're getting stronger now. Whatever is causing these must be getting pretty close to the city-"

"Aaaaaaah!"

"Waaaah!"

Everyone's heads snapped up when they heard Steven's panicked cry accompanied by Connie's own shrill shriek. The majority of the screens still showed the two bubble-trapped individuals, so the inhabitants of Engineer's room could watch very clearly as the kidde coaster's cars slammed into Steven's bubble. The bubble didn't break, obviously, but the kinetic force had to go somewhere. Without anything holding the bubble in place, it adhered to the most basic laws of motion and went flying. It was airborne for a scant few seconds before landing.

Into the Ocean.

At least fifty feet from the shore.

…

Silence reigned. Then slowly, almost comically, everyone turned to look at Garnet. The ebony Gem picked up everyone's looks with a bit less composure than normal. She swallowed to calm her oddly dry throat.

"Ah…" She said at length, "I believe…now would be an appropriate time to interfere."

After that, there was only the sound of a dozen individuals scrambling to the nearby teleporter.

Steven groaned as he pulled himself off of the bubble's 'floor'. Apparently, getting hit by a rollercoaster was not, in fact, an effective way of breaking free from his magical bubble.

In all honesty, that was probably for the better. Steven admitted to himself that he wasn't really thinking through what would come after breaking free from the bubble and facing high-powered cars rushing him at a rather high velocity. That didn't necessarily make him happy that both he and Connie were now stuck on the ocean's floor, though.

Connie!

The-half Gem beat down and offered a hand to the fallen Indian girl. She took it tentatively, allowing to Steven help pull her back up to her feet. Connie smoothed out her skirt and looked at Steven gratefully, "Thanks," She says. Her gaze drifts around the boy and to their surroundings. Connie's eyes widen as she beholds the hauntingly majestic environment that is the ocean floor, "Is this…where are we right now?" She asks Steven, looking slightly panicked.

"The bottom of the ocean," Steven said it as easily as one would say 'the sky is blue'. This did nothing to help Connie's nerves, as the Indian girl gasped at the confirmation. Steven starts as he realizes what he just did, "W-wait! It's okay!" He tries to placate the scared girl, holding his hands out in a calming gesture.

Connie calms down eventually, though not by much if her incensed expression is anything to go by, "Are we even close to the shore?"

"Yeah, sure!" Steven says automatically, despite honestly not knowing one way or the other. But he had enough wherewithal to know that he should keep Connie calm. People made mistakes when they were scared, and he really didn't need any more mistakes to happen today.

Granted, a fair amount of those mistakes were due to his own judgement, but that was neither here nor there at the moment.

Connie fumed for a bit longer, then she closed her eyes and took a deep breath, "Okay…" She says after a moment and her eyes have opened, "We should start rolling back to the beach then." The girl punctuates her statement by pressing against the edge of the bubble facing the shore and walking forward. A half-second later, Steven does the same, using his own inhuman strength for the better.

The two travel in silence for about ten seconds, one too focused on trying to get back to the relative safety of the shore and the other too worried/nervous about trying to instigate a conversation. Eventually, Steven gathers up what remains of his courage and speaks up, "It's a good thing this bubble is airtight," He starts off in an upbeat manner, trying to raise the oppressive atmosphere, "Otherwise, we'd probably be drowning right now. Ha ha ha ha…" Steven's nervous laughs trail off when he observes the haunted look on Connie's face, doubtlessly brought about by Steven's casual comment concerning about how close they were-and technically still are-to their demise.

Steven resists the urge to slap himself in the forehead, but only just, 'Why?! Why would I say that?! She's obviously still terrified!' He thinks to himself. After a couple more seconds filled with Steven internally berating himself, the half-Gem backpedals on his previous comment and tries once again at conversation, "Don't worry Connie, I still have several ideas that could help us get out of this bubble. There's one that I think will definitely work," He says confidently, completely oblivious of Connie's skeptical glance, "We just have to get back to shore and-"

"AAAAAAAH!"

Steven jumps at Connie's terrified scream and turns to face the Indian girl, "What?! What's wrong?" He asks. Connie however, is not forthcoming with an answer. Her head is turned upwards to look directly above them and-once again-she looks terrified out of her wits. Steven follows her gaze after a moment and looks upward as well. The half-Gem gasps in amazement.

"Woah…"

Floating-or a better choice of words would be swimming-above them is a long, brown creature that appeared to be a cross between a sea serpent and a worm. It's body was covered in a clear layer of skin that just appeared to be some sort of slime at first glance, but the five tendrils at the creature's 'head' were comprised of only the skin, meaning that the creature had some manner of control over them. Its brown body was speckled with blue and grey spots along its back. The creature's body appeared to have a uniform thickness except at two points, the tail-which tapered off into a thin, eel-like tail-and the head-which was rounder and more bulbous than the rest of the creature's body. As it drifted above the bubble, the children could clearly see into the creature's sucker-like mouth, which was filled with rows upon rows of jagged, razor-sharp teeth, the smallest of which was about the size of Connie's head. At the back of the creature's throat, there was a brightly glowing red gem with a nice pentagonal facet. This confirmed what Steven believed at the start-that the creature was actually a type of Gem monster and not a product of natural evolution, "A huge worm…" The half-Gem whispered in wonder as he watched the majestic-albeit twisted-creature pass them by.

Connie, however, had no knowledge of Gem creatures and instead focused on the huge mouth full of teeth perfect for tearing into flesh. With only a layer of a supposedly 'magic' bubble standing between her and the creature, Connie felt understandably terrified. 'Well,' The rational part of her mind said to her, 'This bubble has stood up against a harpoon gun and the force of rollercoaster cars. It must be pretty thick in order to sink to the bottom of the ocean, especially considering how much air is actually inside it. Whatever this thing is, it probably won't be able to break this bubble.' Were Connie a bit less frantic at the moment, this string of logic might've had a pretty good chance of calming her down entirely.

However, Connie's nerves had been stretched to the limit today and were in severe danger of finally snapping. As such, the emotional part of her mind completely drowned out the logical side with a burst of fear at the sight of seeing such a dangerous and strange creature. The girl shrieked once more and buried her head in her hands, trying to block out the creature from both sight and mind.

Steven turns to Connie at the sound of her cry and sets a reassuring hand on her shoulder, causing the girl to look back at him. The half-Gem's calm expression is slightly infectious, and Connie finds herself slightly less frightened as she watches him, "It's okay! Look-it only wants to eat that glowing stuff," Steven points towards to creature and Connie-after a brief moment of apprehension-turns to the worm once more. Indeed, the creature was snapping up strands of red-glowing seaweed that was waving in the current of the ocean. When the creature faced them, Connie's heart jumped into her throat, but it only glanced at them for a moment before it turned away in disinterest and resumed eating the seaweed. Connie let out a breath she had been holding and looked once more to Steven, who was now wearing a happy smile, "See? Not scary at all."

Connie had to admit, now that she knew the creature was apparently herbivorous-or at the very least omnivorous but not interested in a human meal-it became much less frightening. In fact, as she watched the creature swim in its strange patterns as it ate, Connie would go so far as to say the creature was…beautiful, in a sense. It had an air of grace and majesty that wasn't common among most animals of Earth. Connie stared at the creature in wide-eyed fascination as it finished its meal, expecting the creature to swim off in search of more food.

The worm, on the other hand, appeared to have different plans. It held its head high, let out a sound that seemed like a combination between a warbling cry and a vicious hiss, and dived into the ocean floor. It burrowed deeply, 'too deeply', Connie thought when the tremors from the creature's digging spread out across the ocean floor. For a while, the girl had been wondering what the source of the strange tremors was. It appeared as though she finally had her answer. She now wished to be as far away from the creature as possible.

Fate wasn't listening to her pleas, however, or she was merely feeling particularly spiteful today for whatever reason. One of the fissures created by the worm's burrowing spread across the ocean floor towards the bubble where Steven and Connie sat trapped. Even if they hadn't fallen on their rears from the tremors, they still had too little speed and maneuverability in their bubble to escape the fissure. So the two could only watch as the ground beneath them split apart, sending them and their ostensibly heavy bubble prison down even further. There was a brief feeling of weightlessness as they floated down, followed quickly by a very uncomfortable and sudden stop as their bubble hit the ground once more. Connie only had a moment to remark at how unpleasant the fall was when her thoughts were interrupted by the bottom of a sandal meeting her face.

Luckily for Connie, Steven had been walking on a pristine beach for most of the day, and the completely clean inside of a magical pink bubble for the rest. So there wasn't anything particularly nasty on the sole of the sandal. It was still very unpleasant, though, and a bit painful.

To Steven's credit, he quickly realized what he had unintentionally done after he got over his own aches and pains, "S-sorry!" He stammered out as he removed his foot from Connie's face. And not a moment too soon, if her muffled voice was any indication, "Are you alright?" Steven asked as he held out a hand to help the girl up. Connie ignored the offered help, however, and stood up under her own power. The oddly blank expression on Connie's face unnerved Steven, and he could feel how worried and scared she was. In typical Steven Universe fashion, he attempted to make like of the situation, "It's not so bad!" He said as he looked around at the dark rocky ravine they had fallen into, their only source of light the luminescent crystals and plants that grew from the rocky walls. Steven turned his gaze upward once again to determine how far they had fallen. The half-Gem's heart sank a bit when he saw how high up the sun was-apparently they had fallen a long way, "Uhh…It-it's okay! I-" Steven struggled to come up with a good excuse or plan to get them out.

But Connie had had enough.

"It's NOT okay!" She shouted, startling Steven with the sudden increase in volume. Connie opened her eyes and stared at the frightened boy with a glare that seemed more worried than angry, "You keep saying that, but you don't have any idea what's you're doing!" She stood up to her full height and held her shaking fists at her side. On a closer inspection, her whole body seemed to be trembling. She seemed to be running out of anger and moving quickly into despair; "Now we're going to suffocate or-worse!-starve at the bottom of the ocean. A-and only my parents will notice me missing because no one else cares about me!" Tears sprung to Connie's eyes when she brought that old wound up. She hadn't really meant to talk about that, but she was just getting overwhelmed with her emotions at the moment. Steven had taken quick notice of what she had said.

By now, the tears in Connie's eyes were threatening to spill out, and the young girl seemed to be having trouble keeping her voice from shaking, "I-I'm gonna disappear without ever making a single friend…" She finally managed to say, in a voice not much higher than a whisper. Once the words finally escaped her lips, Connie fell to her knees and held her face in her hands, sobbing. She wanted so bad to be able to blame this on Steven, but she just couldn't. The boy had saved her life from that falling rock with the bubble they were currently trapped in-a rock so large that it would've certainly killed her. Even though he couldn't make it go away, Steven had been nothing but helpful in trying to break them both free from it. True, his suggestions were getting a little extreme, and it was thanks to one that they were now stuck where they were, but to be fair, she didn't really have any ideas of her own. Magic? That was something that Connie had always dismissed as a fairy tale. Apparently it was real, however, and she had about as much of an idea to deal with it as Steven did. She probably had even less of an idea, considering that Steven seemed so blasé about the bubble and giant monster.

It didn't really matter in the end who was to blame, though. And all Steven's efforts in saving her life seemed to get him was the chance to die alongside Connie at the ocean floor. At the very least, the two of them wouldn't die…alone…

Connie's train of thought derailed as a glowing pink light crept into the edges of her vision. Confused, the girl removed her hands from her eyes. She saw Steven's outstretched hand holding onto a very familiar-looking glowing bracelet.

"We could be friends."

Connie looked up. Steven was giving her a soft smile as he held the bracelet out to her. Despite the situation they were in, and what she had just said to him, she could see nothing but sincerity in the boy's eyes.

"I saw you at the boardwalk parade last year," He admitted to her, looking a bit sheepish as he said that, "You dropped your bracelet. I picked it up…but then I couldn't find you."

Connie wiped her eyes clear as she listened to Steven talk. She was a bit flattered, to be honest, that out of everyone at the parade that year, this boy had noticed her and cared enough to pick up what she had initially thought of as only a minor trinket. Steven apparently thought it held more meaning to her, as Connie soon learned.

The half-Gem took the bracelet in both of his hands and stared at it, "I saved it in the freezer, so it would last longer," Steven continued. He looked up at Connie after a moment, "In case I saw you again." He clarified.

And just like that, something clicked in Connie's mind. Something she had been wondering about since Steven had first protected her from that falling rock-'Why does this kid look so familiar?'

"Oh!" Connie exclaimed once the pieces came together, "You were the kid on the statue float!" Connie blinked as she realized something else, and she cracked a smile, "Didn't that purple woman toss you around a bit?"

"Hehe, yeah…" Steven said sheepishly as heat rose to his cheeks. The half-Gem rubbed his neck awkwardly, "Amethyst does get a little out of hand sometimes."

Remembering the boardwalk parade was a pretty happy time for Steven-it was one of his favorite recent memories, to be perfectly honest. A few weeks before the event itself, Steven had brought home a flyer for the parade, one that encouraged the support of any and all Beach City citizens willing to participate in the parade. Steven himself had been pretty ecstatic about it, and was dead-set on participating in the parade with a float of his own. He just wanted to run the idea past his family first, to see if they had any suggestions.

In their typical fashion, the mercenaries displayed a slightly concerning degree of enthusiasm for the idea, and set about pitching several possible parade floats. All of the mercenaries had their own ideas, some bordering on dangerous and several others being slightly more concerning-especially Soldier's idea for a blood-soaked battleground, euugh-but it was Spy who came up with the final product.

Why not build a float resembling something that had been a part of Beach City from the very moment it had been founded? Why not build a float in the visage of the Crystal Temple?

The others thought that idea was great, and Steven was especially excited since that meant that the Gems would also be finally participating in the event. Oh, they brought Steven to watch the parades on multiple occasions, but the Gems preferred to stay on the sidelines. Even Amethyst wasn't too big a fan of getting in the center of attention, at least as herself.

It took a lot of begging, pleading, haggling and every ounce of Steven's childish charms to convince the Gems to ride the float itself. Steven had asked the mercenaries to join them, but they had declined, saying that they were just fine with building the float itself. The human team of the Crystal Gems had been at Beach City for a generation, but the Gems themselves had been there for millennia. That honor was reserved to the Gems alone, they had said.

Also, there was a minor concern with the fact that the mercenaries were marginally more violent and unstable than the Gems, despite the progress they made to balance themselves out. Parading them around on a highly-visible float for all to see was probably a bit too self-serving for them, considering that some of them (Soldier) were technically criminals in a sense. Besides, the Gems were basically the superheroes of the squad, whereas the mercenaries were the more violent, less powerful anti-heroes of the equation. If the Gems were the equivalent of Superman, than the mercenaries were the equivalent of Deadpool, at least to the public.

And so it was that the Gems participated in one of Beach City's boardwalk parades, each of them perched upon a beautifully recreated model of the Crystal Temple's exterior. Heavy drove the truck carrying the float around while the three Gems plus Steven waved from the back. They were a little awkward at first-Pearl mostly-and a bit stiff-Garnet especially-but they eventually loosened up and became more comfortable with the proceedings. Even Pearl, who had not trouble with being admired so long as it wasn't only for her looks, admitted to having a great time.

Of course Amethyst, as always, got a little too excited from all the attention and decided to put on a bit of a show. She grabbed Steven and clambered to the top of the float-which would be the head of the statue. From there she tossed the half-Gem into the air a few times, which wouldn't have been particularly bad, per se, had Amethyst not been trying to toss Steven. After the first two or three fifteen-foot falls Steven got into the rhythm a bit and had actually been enjoying himself. Garnet of course put a stop to it before it had gone too far and Pearl had reigned in her neuroticism for the duration of the parade, ensuring that there were no public spectacles. When the parade finally ended, Engineer activated a special secret function on the float. Hidden panels popped open and the statue graced the viewers with a miniature fireworks display, courtesy of Demoman's, Soldier's and Pyro's knowledge of pyrotechnics. The crowd-and Steven-loved it. Steven could say that it was one of the best memories of his young life, and in more ways than one.

Steven and Connie shared a few chuckles upon remembering the parade. The half-Gem then turned a bit serious as he looked to Connie once more, "I'm sorry, Connie," He finally said. Connie was confused, what on Earth did Steven have to apologize for? He didn't really do anything wrong. She became even more flustered when the boy took her small hand in his own large, gentle grasp, causing her to blush, "If I had just returned this to you back then…" Steven continued as he held Connie's arm out and placed the bracelet on her wrist, "You wouldn't be stuck in this bubble with me now." He finished, but let his hands linger.

Connie was certainly more nervous with the well-meaning contact, but she wasn't exactly put off by it. In fact, if she was being 100% honest with herself, she kind of enjoyed it.

"N-no no!" Connie stuttered out, holding up her bracelet-covered hand in a 'stop' motion, "It's okay! I'm having fun." She admitted with a happy smile. When Steven returned one of his own smiles, Connie relaxed. Steven was a little strange, no doubt about that, but she could definitely say that she enjoyed his company. Besides, didn't the kids at her school think she was weird? There was no reason why she couldn't be friends with Steven.

Sitting here in this bubble, cut off from the outside, Connie and Steven finally relaxed and took a nice, quiet moment in each other's company. It was adorable, really.

Then Steven's bubble burst, causing what remaining air to stream to the surface in a storm of bubbles and allowed a rush of water to completely submerge the two. Fate really seemed like she had it out for these two kids today.

Connie covered her mouth and screwed her eyes shut at the sudden rush of water. She had swallowed a bit of the seawater during the initial shock of losing the bubble, but not too much. Even so, the Indian girl struggled to fight the need to cough-that would just cause her to inhale more liquid, 'Of all the times for the thing to break, why now?!' Connie screamed inside of her mind, frustrated beyond belief that a real bonding moment between her and her newest friend had been interrupted by something else beyond their control.

Connie's eyes opened when she felt someone grabbing her wrist. Knowing that it could only be one person, she wasn't surprised to find Steven swimming just above her. The boy actually looked pretty well for being submerged as deep as they were. He raised his other arm and pointed above them; the message was clear, they had to swim up. Connie dropped her other arm from her mouth and used it, along with her legs, to push them both up to the surface. Steven, clad in his usual t-shirt and jeans had no trouble swimming, but Connie's thick dress and boots were slowing her down. The half-Gem pushed extra hard with his limbs to cover enough ground for both of them. Connie lungs burned, desperate for air and looking to expel what water had rushed in. It certainly didn't help that she was swimming faster than she even had before in her life. As she looked up, she could see the surface of the water coming closer and closer, until-

*SPLASH*

Connie sucked in a single lungful of air before her organs protested against the presence of water within them. She began coughing and hacking forcefully, almost to the point where it became painful for her to breathe. Steven wasn't wracked by coughs as she was, but from his groans he likely wasn't feeling any better than she was.

It took a few seconds before either of them managed to get their breathing under control. Once they had, there was a short bout of silence as the two processed what exactly had just happened. Then they looked at each other.

"Hehe…"

"Ha…"

Steven chuckled a bit as the danger passed, leaving only the humorous circumstances behind. His laughter having lost none of its infectivity, Connie soon found herself giggling a bit as well, though not as loudly. It seemed as though everything was going to be alright; they had escaped the bubble and swam all the way to the surface without any complications. It really was okay, as Steven had promised.

Then the water behind them started churning. There was an even greater splash as something surfaced and let out a hellish screech.

'Oh right,' Connie thought in a brief moment of bliss, 'The giant worm. Of course.'

A second later the danger of the situation hit her in full force, causing a predictable reaction from both her and Steven. The two children screamed and started swimming towards the shore. In response, the worm crashed back into the ocean, kicking up a great tidal wave that swept the children all the way back onto the beach. Though her muscles cried out in protest, Connie forced herself up and whipped around, searching for the worm. It was swimming towards them at a frighteningly quick pace, warbling and hissing like it was possessed. Connie did the only sensible thing and helped Steven back up onto his feet as well. She then began frantically pulling Steven back to the city, "Come on, come on!" Connie urges desperately, unwilling to let either of them end up as worm food. Steven quickly starts running under his own power. Even so, Connie hears the crazed hissing and mad splashing of the worm behind them, hot on their heels.

Trying not to think about what might happen if the worm catches them, Connie spots a large outcropping of rocks right next to the nearby wooden pier. She comes to a logical conclusion; "Hide in the rocks, Steven!" She cries, and goes to do just that.

Steven, meanwhile, had thought it better if they had split up. That way, he could draw the worm's attention away from Connie while the girl ran to safety. As he darted around one of the wooden, he heard Connie scream. The half-Gem looked back, fearing the worst.

There, on the rocks, was Connie. Right behind her was the open mouth of the Gem-worm creature, its feelers wriggling in anticipation of its next meal. With a degree of agility he hadn't seen from the young girl, Connie jumped away just as the worm snapped at her, narrowly avoiding its jagged maw. Even with her impressive dodge, the girl still looked scared out of her wits.

Steven wracked his brains for a reason as to why the worm had taken a sudden interest in them-he just couldn't figure it out, "Why is it chasing us now?!" He yelled out, hoping that something might provide an adequate answer. The only response he received was yet another furious hiss from the creature as it rose up and re-focused on Connie.

Wait…

Steven peered a bit closer at the worm. It wasn't looking directly at Connie, but instead slightly off to the left of her. The half-Gem tracked the worm's eyeless gaze and gasped when his vision focused on the very bracelet he had given Connie not two minutes ago.

"The bracelet!" Steven gasped as the worm's hostile actions finally made sense, "That's right, it eats bright stuff!" The boy sprinted towards Connie just as the girl came running towards him, "Connie!"

"Steven!" She replied. Steven ran around and looped behind her so that his path was now parallel to her own. He wasted no time in trying to get her free of danger, "Give me the bracelet!" He yells, struggling to be heard over the worm's cries and all of the noise its making.

"What?!" Connie yells back, clearly not understanding. But she still held out her arm and allowed Steven to draw the glowing bracelet off of her wrist. Once Steven has it in hand he raises it high above his head, making sure to grab the attention of the still-pursuing worm.

"It's okay!" He says, looking back to the worm instead of at her, "I've got this! Now go, go! Run that way!" Steven gives Connie a slight nudge to turn her away from his path. Of course, a slight nudge from Steven still felt like a two-handed shove, and Connie stumbled a bit before regaining her footing, "I'm sorry!" She hears Steven say, even as he sprints away from the homicidal worm.

Now unpursued, Connie freely makes her way out from underneath the pier and takes a moment to catch her breath. Once she feels well enough, she turns back to look at Steven to make sure he was still alright.

She really needn't have worried.

With such an incredible degree of agility and speed that belied his girth, Steven dodged, dove, leapt, darted and jumped around the worm's long body; the worm's fanged maw nipping at his heels. He seemed to be just a few steps ahead of the eldritch creature, as it had to slow down on the sharp turns. This luckily kept the creature off balance for Steven's plan to come into effect.

The creature-apparently not noticing or not particularly caring about the pattern Steven was running in-had somehow managed to tie itself up in knots wrapped around the pier's wooden supports. It shrieked, squirmed and struggled, but that only served to tighten the self-made knots in its body, keeping it trapped in place.

Steven, looking far more frightened than normal, leapt over a length of the worm that was tied to the posts ahead of him and skidded to a stop right next to Connie. The worm sprung forward, eager for a meal, only to stop just short of the children as its body pulled taut. It had run out of slack, and not a moment too soon. Furious, the worm shrieked and howled as it thrashed against its self-made bonds like a raving animal.

Without conscious effort, the two children reached to each other for support and grasped their hands together with an iron grip.

Heedless of the bond being formed in front of it, the worm continued to flail and struggle in an effort to move. It gave a particularly strong pull in one direction, causing one of the supports to snap from the sheer force. The worm felt its body relax as part of its length broke free and eagerly struck out again, making two more supports snap. Connie and Steven gasped and took a step back to start running once more.

But the other supports couldn't handle both the added weight from the lost columns and the force of the worm tugging on them as well. Like a chain reaction, the supports snapped one after the other until there was nothing holding the heavy wooden deck up. A large section of the pier and the jagged support columns collapsed upon the worm. With several tons of heavy, water-soaked wood slamming into its body as well as dozens of jagged beams piecing its gel-like hide, the worm's body quickly failed under the assault and burst into a huge cloud of pale dust. Steven and Connie, still too shocked for words, stood statue-still as the clouds rolled over them. A deathly silence hung in the air as nothing moved, save for the clouds of Gem dust that slowly began to dissipate.

"STEVEN!"

The young boy and girl performed an about-face when they heard the sound of twelve voices calling out. Sprinting across the beach towards them was a very familiar group of faces-more recognizable to Steven than to Connie. They stopped short when they noticed the collapsed pier and the clouds of dust that were slowly disappearing.

"Steven, what's going on?" Pearl said as she watched the clouds drift about, easily recognizing what exactly the dust was.

"Wot the bloody hell did you do?" Sniper asked incredulously as his gaze scanned the shattered section of the pier. His accent slipped in as his speech picked up.

Steven seemed unable to respond, still too unsettled from the worm's attack and subsequent death to even begin explaining what had just happened, "Uh…"

"He was incredible!"

Steven whipped his head around at Connie's declaration, as did Steven's family. The Indian's girl's eyes were filled with diamonds, and her face showed nothing short of absolute amazement as she spoke.

"Huh?" Steven said, very much not expecting that sort of response from the girl, "R-really? You mean it?"

"Mmhmm!" Connie confirmed with a smile and nod.

Realizing that there was nothing to (currently) be worried about, the Gems and mercenaries relaxed. Which was for the best, because while none of them had their weapons out when they came down, (miraculous, I know) several of the mercs seemed ready to pull a gun if anyone looked at them funny. Connie's appraisal of Steven seemed to mollify them as well as the Gems, thankfully. Soldier jogged over and picked up the worm's Gem-which was thankfully unharmed-and began scrutinizing it.

Steven reached down and took Connie's hand once again, oblivious to the faint blush the girl displayed and the knowing grins some of the mercenaries shared, "Here's your bracelet," Steven said as he slid the glowing piece of jewelry over Connie's arm, "…again."

"Thanks." Connie replied, laughing at the boy's awkwardness. Now that she had it again, the young girl was definitely keeping it, as a memento of her first friend and the weird day they spent together. He really was a nice kid if he really had kept this thing in good condition just for her.

"Oof!"

Connie looked up at Steven's surprised huff, fully expecting him to be in danger once again. She stopped short when she processed the image in front of her. Steven was a couple feet off the ground, held in a crushing bear-like hug by a person (?) whose body was completely encased in some sort of fire retardant suit. As Connie continued to stare, she noticed that the suited person seemed to be crying, if the muffled, blubbery sounds that escaped its vocalizer could be counted as crying.

"Pyro!" Steven gasped out, obviously not getting in the air he needed to speak, "It's okay! I'm okay! We got that Gem monster, and we weren't even hurt!"

This only seemed to make the suited person hug Steven even tighter, if the boy's reddening face was any indication. Luckily, someone noticed the rough treatment Steven was getting, and moved in to stop it. A one-eyed man of African descent walked over and tapped the suited person on the shoulder, causing it to turn to him.

"Lad…er, lass…" The one-eyed man started, looking distinctly uncomfortable for some reason before shaking his head, "Don't ye think ye're holding on to Steven a bit tight there? Any longer and he'll turn blue."

Almost as if it hadn't noticed what it was doing, 'Pyro' looked back at Steven's face, which actually had turned an interesting shade of purple, despite the fact that Steven was still smiling-even if it was a little forced. Surprised, the suited person released Steven from its grip, allowing the boy to fall flat on his back and suck in some much needed air. Pyro blubbered a bit more through its rebreather as it tried to apologize to Steven, while the boy attempted to get enough air in his body to say its wasn't necessary.

"CADET!"

Connie cringed and held her hands up to her ears to block out that incredibly loud and brash voice. The girl looked around to find the source of that obnoxious yell, and soon discovered the cause when she spotted a man in a red military jacket and a bowl-like helmet covering his eyes stomped towards them. He stopped short and stood ramrod straight.

"Cadet!" He yelled again-thankfully at a lower volume-as he looked down at Steven. At least, it looked like he was looking at Steven to Connie, the man's obscured eyes made it a little difficult to see where he was looking. The man held out the large gemstone that came from the creature out to Steven, "Are you aware of what this is?" He said in a military-like address to Steven.

"Um…yeah!" Steven said after a moment, looking decidedly uncomfortable, "That's the gem that came from the big worm-guy!"

The loud helmeted man seemed satisfied by that answer, "Did you or did you NOT remove this troublesome, ugly maggot from our fair city?!"

"Uh, well I wouldn't call it ugly, really-"

"Did you?!"

"Er-! Yes, sir!" Steven said, saluting the man as best as possible.

"And were you or were you NOT completely unarmed and cut off from reinforcements while doing so? Thus forcing you to use the environment to your advantage in order to take down your enemy?!"

"Yes! I mean…no! I mean, uh…yes? Yes I was by myself and without weapons SIR!"

For several seconds, the man was silent. Steven shuffled uncomfortably under the man's gaze, but he didn't lower the hand he was saluting with. Connie noticed that the suited person and the one-eyed man seemed to be giving the helmeted man annoyed looks, one of them in spite of the fact that it had a mask completely obscuring its face. Then, the helmeted man crouched down to Steven's level and clapped a heavy hand on the boy's shoulder.

"I'm so proud of you!" He said, cracking a grin that reminded Connie of the few slasher flicks she had seen advertisements for, "Your first blooded enemy! And by only using your wit and physical prowess as well! Truly, you are going to grow up to be a fine warrior!"

Steven only looked increasingly comfortable as his helpless gaze shifted to Connie. Unsure of what exactly she was supposed to do, the girl merely shrugged in a similar helpless manner. Steven turned to look back at the helmeted man, "Um, Soldier-"

"Just imagine it, cadet!" 'Soldier' said, completely cutting Steven off as he held the hand that gripped the Gem up to the night sky, "Finally being able to join us on the battlefield! Surrounded on all sides by soulless robots and malformed maggots! The smell of fire and oil in the air!"

"Soldier I-"

"Then, you charge them! Taking them down, one by one, using everything in your arsenal until every rocket and bullet is fired!"

"Soldier-"

"And when those maggots think they've got you beat when you throw down your empty launcher, you pull out your trusty shovel and PROVE THOSE FOOLS WRONG!"

"Sol-"

"Finally, you'll stand atop a mountain of your defeated foes! Covered from head to toe in dust and oil! When you take the last, pathetic robot's head in your hands, see it plead for its pitiful life as it tries to claw away, you CRUSH IT WITH YOUR BARE-!"

*ffft*

"-handsow!" Soldier yelped as a rather large syringe embedded itself in his neck. He stood stock-still for a moment, then tapped the needle with his hand and pulled it out to look at it.

He then fell face-first onto the sand, somehow with the helmet remaining on his head, dropped the gem and started snoring. Connie, Steven and Steven's two family members looked at the insensate Soldier.

"You'll have to excuse him," Piped up a new voice, this one with a German accent. Connie turned once more and spotted a fourth man-this one wearing a white doctor's coat and a pair of spectacles-walking towards them. In his hands was a strange-looking device, something that seemed to be capable of shooting needles. Connie didn't get a chance to examine it in depth as the doctor swiftly tucked it into his coat and out of sight. When Connie looked at him, the man's face was full of exasperation, "He's an idiot," The man finished, causing Steven to chuckle nervously. He then turned to the two other adults near them and snapped his fingers, "You two! Help me carry zhis dummkopf back home."

The one-eyed man rolled his remaining eye, but walked over to the insensate Soldier and picked up one of the man's legs. His suited companion did the same, but without any visible complaint. They then began dragging Soldier away through the sand, with their doctor friend a few steps behind them. The doctor turned and gave Connie a toothless smile before turning back to the three others and barking orders at them.

Connie turned back to Steven, idly noticing that one of the three women had moved next to them and had picked up the red Gem, "Sooo…" She said, trying to find out where she should start, "…Friends of yours?"

Steven looked sheepish and rubbed his neck awkwardly, "Family, actually." He mumbled. Suddenly, Steven jumped once again when he felt someone grab onto his shoulders. He looked back at his new attacker-Amethyst-with an expression of surprise. The purple Gem merely looked past him and towards Connie, giving the boy a wry grin, "So, are you going to introduce us?"

"Uh…"

"Steven was so excited to meet you!" Pearl said in her melodic voice as she leaned down next to Steven, "Right, Steven?" She continues with a soft smile as she looks at Steven.

Connie noticed Steven's face grew a bit more red as he started nodding and chuckling awkwardly at her. It was kinda cute how embarrassed he was by his family.

"Hey!"

The third woman, the one Connie saw messing around with the Gem a moment ago, stepped up behind the two others. Connie watched, wide-eyed, as the third woman lifted the other two up by their cuffs, each in a separate hand, "Don't mess with his funky flow." She said before turning and walking off towards the other adults, who had congregated into a small group just down the beach.

For several seconds, there was peaceful silence as nothing else interrupted them. Then Connie turned and arched a brow at Steven, "Funky…flow?"

"Uhh…Ah, ha…ha ha ha…ugh…"

Not too far off from the two children, but far enough to be out of earshot, two figures watched as Steven squirmed a bit in embarrassment before attempting to deflect Connie's question.

Scout cringed at Steven's discomfort, but smiled all the same at the humor. He chuckled a bit, "Man, this is startin' to get a little painful to watch…"

Spy snorted without turning to look at the Bostonian, "As if you were any better at his age."

"Hey," Scout growled, pointing an accusing finger at the Frenchman, "I only eva' had trouble with the real 'classy' types. At his age, I had my own little posse of chicks following me around," A lightbulb seemed to pop over the runner's head as he thought of something and smirked, "Actually…maybe I could give the little guy a few pointers on how to woo this Connie girl."

Spy looked incredulously at his companion, "You? Giving relationship advice?"

"Yeah. Why? Ya' got a problem with 'dat?"

"Yes, I believe I do actually," Spy answered as he turned to face Scout fully, "You're a bit too…immature, when it comes to delicate matters such as this."

"Hey!"

"Truthfully, if Steven should come to anyone for advice, it would make sense for him to come to the one with the most experience with women." Spy said smugly as he puffed out his chest.

Scout arched his brow, "Engie? Well, I mean I guess he can give some good advice-"

Spy deflated a bit, "What? No, not Engineer."

"Oh, you mean Heavy then? Dat actually makes some more sense, the guy did have three sisters, he probably knows what-"

"Not Heavy either."

Scout scratched his head as he thought, "…Medic then?"

"No you imbecile! Me!" Spy snarled as he pointed a finger at himself.

Scout blew a raspberry, "You? Please, I couldn't get half of your stupid-ass techniques right, but I still managed to get the attention of more than a few women on my own. 'Sides, Steven seems a little too young for some of your…er, 'seduction' methods." Scout said, miming air quotes.

"Well, at the very least I'm trying to do something more than simply get into a hapless young lady's pants like you constantly do!"

"Hey-!"

A deep rumble behind the two made them momentarily trail off. Slowly they turned ninety degrees. Behind them was a very large and very angry-looking Russian with his arms crossed over his chest. The man growled low in his throat as he stared at Spy and Scout. The two turned back to each other after a moment.

"Maybe we should let Steven figure this out on his own without making this more complicated than it needs to be."

"Yeah, dat sounds like a pretty good idea…"

A/N: SO! There we go. Nice canonical stories from the added perspectives of the mercenaries. Hopefully more plot in the nest chapter but no promises. Actually, these two chapters kinda followed the same format as Frybo and Together Breakfast, only slight changes to the canon due to their worldbuilding nature.

Anyways, the reason I took a while to update this time was due to the college pressure I'm feeling. I'm starting some summer classes to get a nice head start on my coursework, but I've had to cram all this planning, packing, and emotional family junk into three or four weeks. This story kinda fell to the wayside as a result. I'm really sorry about that, but updates may take a bit longer than a month from now own since I have to get comfortable at my college. Not too much free time for storywriting, but I'll make time. I can't leave you guys hanging!

On the lighter side, look at what material we've gotten in the time since the last update! We get to see the watermelon-Steven island. Malachite returns, then breaks apart. A certain orange puff falls into the underworld. Steven and our favorite green dorito travel to the center of the Earth to stop the cluster, and instead they end up bubbling the durn thing. Lapis stays at the barn, with an awesome backstory that will fit pretty well into my new canon, rooming with Peridork. Then, the Ruby episode.

Oh, the Ruby episode.

Oooooooooooh, the RUBY episode.

Then Steven learns how to float. That's cool I guess.

And then, hiatus. GOD DAMMIT-

Deep breaths…Okay. Anyways, some good news!

Team Universe is now one of the recommended crossover fics on Tvtropes! Big thanks to N8han11 for the recommendation! Woooo!

…..

It means a lot to me…

Now, to the reviews!

darkromdemon: Thanks for the well wishes! The mercenaries will be routinely be developing new weapons and goodies as the story progresses, keep your eyes peeled!

Potat0s0Verlord: ….Dark Wraiths…..Huh? Oh, I kinda went somewhere for a second…Anyways, sorry about the dry spell, and I can only hope this chapater is up to snuff!

DragShot: You could've asked for another two-in-one chapter, so here you go. Garnet doesn't like it when people try to butt in on a relationship without getting asked for advice first. She'd put the two of them through a wall before letting Steven listen to their drivel. Thanks for the reading!

Robute Gulliman: How about bimonthly updates? Hahahahaa…*crippling feeling of inadequacy* Your praise means a lot though, so thanks!

Speerut: Yeah, this is kinda spoiler-y now that I think about it…but thanks for the support and I hope your friend enjoys my story as well!

Arclight-Zero: Aw, stoppit you're making me blush….And Merasmus will become plot-critical later on. Thanks for the review and I hope you continue to enjoy my work!

An abundance of squids: I always thought Merasmus was kind of a (if you'll pardon the pun) hidden gem. You could do a lot with his character, and it'd probably work out since he's as flexible as the mercs. He'll be important later on, so don't diss him so early. He might give you a super-sized head. Thank you for enjoying my story!

aznalpha: Ah, the million-dollar question. My answer? No. I don't want to get too non-canon with the character's backstories or facts here, and since few names are confirmed, I just won't use their legal names, unless they have a confirmed identity. Even then, they'll be used sparingly.

Jin Shirinue, Fagsworth, Frejamazing, SAK-96: Thank you all so much for your support and I can only hope that my continued work will still impress and entertain you!

Liquid-Sapphire: I have to keep myself from thinking that far ahead yet, but only because I want those scenarios to happen sooo badly. It was actually some of those hypothetical scenes that this story spawned. Anyways, thanks for the support!

That's all for now fellas, come by later for the next chapter on a (hopefully) better timetable!

*sees reviews**holds up empty bowl*

Please, sir or madam, may I have another?