So, yeah, Undertale. Best video game I've ever played.

You know a game is amazing when I feel guilty for trying to reset the game and see the different outcomes. You know a game is amazing when a fricking talking flower becomes a downright tragic villain and a pun-loving skeleton becomes a badass boss. Seriously, this is the oddest game I've ever played, and it's also probably the cleverest. I love it, I love it so much, so it was only a matter or time before I contributed a little something to the fandom.

I am a tad concerned about this one because honestly, this game and a lot of the fan-material that has come out in its wake is so good that anything I try is gonna be mediocre by comparison. Nevertheless, I shall do my best and I will appreciate your feedback.

This fic got its spark from a comic called 'If…', by Hazespawn. You can look up the dubbed version of the comic on Youtube or read it on Deviantart. I HIGHLY recommend you check out Hazespawn's work, especially "Judgment Hall". Fantastic, and beautiful as well.

Oh, and also in this story Frisk is a boy (I don't know why, but the second I saw the character I thought 'boy', and the way I played him he sort of came off as boyish in a Oliver Twist kind of way). Chara is a girl in this version. Napstablook is agender. Mettaton is perfection (that's a gender, right?)

Also also, this story has Sans as Frisk's dad, which means implied Soriel (not gonna be directly seen). I support the pairing, but I understand the other side as well (I love Goat Dad too, guys!). Please don't flood the comment section with shipping war bullets, guys, that's what Youtube is for.

Also also also, reviews are appreciated!

Let's begin!

"it's a beautiful night outside…"

The child felt his sins crawling up his back as he faced off against the skeleton. Sans' left eye was glowing a sinister shade of electric blue.

"crickets are chirping…the stars are shining…"

The skeleton raised his hand and the child felt his soul grow heavy. He looked down and noticed a heart, a dark blue heart, glowing on the chest of his striped jumper.

"on nights like these…kids like you…"

He felt his feet rise off of the ground and, in spite of his efforts to escape the magical grasp, the child was unable to free himself from Sans' blue attack.

"…should be going to bed!"

Frisk yelped as he was pulled away from his fort of pillows and right into his step-dad's bony arms. He wriggled and whined.

"No faaaair!" he cried. "Magic attacks aren't allowed! That's cheating, and Mom says cheaters are the worst!"

Sans' left eye returned to its normal shade of white once the little seven-year-old savior of the monsters was securely in his arms. The perpetually smiling skeleton chuckled and began to lackadaisically stroll up the stairs.

"tori also said you had to get eight hours a'sleep or she'd have my head…"

"Well, that'd be a good thing," said Frisk with an impish smile. "'Cause that would make her the head-master!"

Sans laughed even as, upstairs, he heard his brother cry out in frustrated fury.

"SANS, STOP TEACHING THAT INNOCENT HUMAN SOUL SUCH UNFUNNY HABITS!"

"i'm so proud," was Sans' only response. He had barely been the boy's adopted step-father for a month and already his influence was rubbing off on the kid. By the time Frisk hit puberty he'd be punning like a pro!

"I'm not innocent!" cried Frisk, "But I am determined!"

And with that, the child detached Sans' arm. Frisk (with his step-father's arm still holding onto him) fled to his pillow fort, diving into the plushy structure. Sans, who despite being rather brittle was quite used to having his limbs detached by the occasionally unruly boy, merely strolled over to the fort and peeked inside. Frisk was clutching Sans' arm protectively.

"good escape kid," said Sans, "i'd give you a hand, but you've already got it!"

Frisk giggled. "You said I could stay up a little later…"

"i said that two hours ago. and i said you could stay up an extra ten minutes…two hours ago."

"Well, you fell asleep on the job, so whose fault is that?" Frisk retorted.

"good point. still, you've gotta go to bed."

"C'mooon, just a little longer? Mom'll never know."

"oho!" laughed Sans. "she'll know, kiddo, she'll know. tori always knows. Now give me my arm."

"Nuh uh!" replied Frisk obstinately.

"alright, you asked for it…"

"Asked for…ah!" Frisk shrieked as Sans' disconnected arm suddenly turned on him and started tickling his tummy. The child squirmed and squealed, but still refused to release the arm and refused to submit to his long-overdue curfew.

"jeez, you are determined. alright, kid, what's it gonna take?

The tickling paused. Frisk took a deep breath and beckoned for Sans to come closer so he could whisper his desire.

"Tomorrow," he said, "We've gotta go to Muffet's bakery…"

"blegh!" was Sans' response. "you serious? those doughnuts taste like expired spider-webs…"

"I didn't finish," said Frisk, smiling impishly as he added, "And when we go there we've gotta take Uncle Papyrus' convertible…and when we give it back…"

He reached under a nearby pillow and pulled out a whoopee cushion. Sans had to cover his mouth to keep himself from bursting into laugher. He wasn't sure what would be funnier: the freak-out his little brother would have as a result of them borrowing his car or Papyrus' reaction to finding such a funny surprise once he sat down in the driver's seat.

"deal," he said with a wink. "but keep faking resistance for now or pap'll get suspicious."

"Right," agreed Frisk with a wink, handing his step-dad his arm. Once Sans had managed to re-attach his limb his eye glowed cyan and he lifted the child out of his pillow fort and into the air while Frisk loudly objected. The kid was gonna have to work on his acting skills a bit, Sans decided. Even though he was getting better at feigning anger he still smiled that silly smile of his as he 'begged' to be put down (turning up the volume considerably once they passed Papyrus' room).

"SANS, ARE YOU DUNKING THE HUMAN AGAIN!? THE GREAT PAPYRUS CANNOT ALLOW HIS FRIEND TO BE DUNKED!"

"too late!" Sans shouted as he casually tossed the young human into his room. Frisk landed on his pillow, nearly hitting his head on the bed-frame but managing to sit up without bumping his skull.

"six points! no concussions this time!" said Sans. "see you tomorrow, kid…"

His voice trailed off fondly. See you tomorrow was a form of farewell he had only recently started to use. He could do so without feeling like a filthy liar now since the little anomaly that was currently straightening out his blanket had assured him that there would be no more RESETs.

No more RESETs. No more uncertainly. No more tomorrows that would never come. That godly power was no longer in irresponsible hands and Sans could sleep soundly knowing that he would indeed see Frisk and Papyrus and everyone tomorrow.

His good mood was destroyed, however, by a sickly sweet voice: "Tomorrow, Trashbag? Hehehehe! Don't be so certain…maybe tonight's the night I finally decide to strangle this little goody-two-shoes in his sleep and reset it all. Wouldn't you like that?"

Sans cast a hateful blue eye towards a small sentiment flower that was resting in a pot on Frisk's desk. The former cause of all Sans' woes, the hateful entity that had once possessed the power to RESET, smiled devilishly. Flowey had (unfortunately) been living with Frisk since the barrier had been broken. The kid was sometimes too nice for his own good. Not only had he spared the wretched weed, but he'd even gone so far as to scoop the miserable waste of magic into a pot and take him home as some psudo-pet/roommate.

Why was anyone's guess, but for some reason the kid was attached to the sentient plant. Sans, for his part, trusted the kid's judgment enough to not destroy Flowey with his gaster blasters right then and there.

"and," said Sans, "how 'bout we go to the park after we, er, borrow pap's car tomorrow? see some flowers that aren't so thorny."

He glowered over at Flowey, who rewarded him with a scowl of his own. Sans hadn't known it until Frisk had explained, but it had been Flowey that had been screwing with the timeline for far too long, turning his life upside down and inside out, making him lose all sense of worth and motivation. He had known for some time that something, someone, was messing with the timeline, but his memory hadn't been good enough to remember who it was. Sans had sensed Frisk's power on the day he emerged from the Ruins and had mistakenly thought that he was the horrid anomaly. Not so, and thanks to Toriel he hadn't made the world's biggest mistake by decimating his supposed archenemy right there and then.

No, his archenemy was sitting securely in a pot that Frisk had decorated with all sorts of shimmering stickers. Smiley faces, hearts, rainbows, the congratulatory stickers that Toriel sometimes gave to children who did well on tests, and there was one bright yellow sticker that Frisk and Papyrus had made which read in bright bubbly letters: Join the Flowey Fan Club!

Suffice to say, Sans had declined that invitation and the Flowey Fan Club remained a mere two members strong.

Frisk, meanwhile, barely paid any mind to Flowey's threats, but he beamed at the word 'park' and nodded eagerly.

"good. then get some sleep," said Sans, flicking off the lights with a wink and shutting the door.

The room was totally silent for a moment as Frisk sat upon his bed, waiting for his step-dad's sluggish footsteps to fade away. When he was certain that Sans was gone, Frisk turned to Flowey. The moonlight that managed to slip through the blinds allowed him to see that Flowey's expression had changed from one of malice to one of weariness.

"Tired?" Frisk chirped. Flowey huffed.

"Next time you and that comedian decide to jump around like imbeciles, could you do so a bit louder?" sneered Flowey sarcastically. "I think there were some monsters in the Underground that weren't rudely awakened!"

"There aren't any more monsters into the Underground, Flowey, at least not on a permanent basis," said Frisk.

"Ooooh, big words," scoffed Flowey. Frisk hopped off his bed and tip-toed over to his desk. He sat in his chair so that he and Flowey were almost eye-to-eye and smiled at his roommate.

"Why d'you always gotta be so mean when Dad's here, Flowey?" he queried. "You're not usually so mean to me, not anymore."

"Keeping up appearances. Plus I'm getting back at him for the sheer number of resets I had to go through because of him. Also, will you stop referring to that buffoon with a deferential paternal title?!"

"Uhm…what?"

"Stop calling him 'Dad', you idiot, he's too stupid to be your dad!"

Rather than reacting with umbrage, Frisk smiled. "Awww, are you saying I'm smart, Flowey?"

"No," denied Flowey hastily. "I'm saying he's stupid."

"He's really not, Flowey. You should know that. Sheer number of resets, after all."

"Point made," snapped Flowey. "Still: if you're gonna refer to someone as 'Dad', at least use the title on someone who has dad qualities. Asgore I could accept-reluctantly, yes, but I could accept. Smiley's not 'Dad' material."

"I think he is," said Frisk with a nonchalant shrug. "Just like I think you're friend material."

"Well, I guess when you put it that way it makes total sense," sneered Flowey, "You're a horrible judge of chara…"

Frisk leaned forward and gave the flower a tiny, affectionate kiss on one of his petals.

"…cter," Flowey finished lamely, turning away so that Frisk wouldn't see his conflicted, confused, and moderately bashful expression. He would sooner be fertilized than admit it, but Frisk had been getting to him. He suspected it was a side effect of him (no, Asriel) absorbing all of those souls and subsequently regaining all of the emotions he had lacked before. Joy, empathy, love…it had been downright overwhelming and even though he was once again a soulless creature who could never hope to experience the full emotional spectrum again…a bit of that love, joy, and empathy lingered, and nobody brought out the ghosts of those emotions as much as Frisk.

Not that he would ever admit that, of course. He still had to keep up appearances, after all. Couldn't let the kid mold him into a doofy, happy-go-lucky moron like he had everyone else.

"D'you wanna come with us to the park tomorrow?" Frisk offered. "I could hide you in my backpack. Dad won't know. You can stretch your stem a bit, maybe meet a pretty rose while we're out there, pollinate…"

"Get your mind out of the gutter," Flowey admonished. "And I have important sulking to do tomorrow so thanks but no…mmmnf!"

He was interrupted as Frisk suddenly covered his mouth with his hand. Flowey scowled furiously at Frisk, but the human child put his finger over his lips, shushing him. He pointed to the blinds and gestured for Flowey to stay quiet while they both peeked out. Flowey's scowl softened with curiosity.

Frisk removed his hand from the plant's mouth and leaned over his desk, his nose brushing against the blinds as he peeked out into the backyard. Flowey did the same and saw what had caused Frisk to suddenly become so cautious: the shed. Sans had gone into the backyard and was opening the shed. The skeleton opened the door wide enough for both Frisk and Flowey to spot something inside, something big and bulky, covered with a sheet.

Flowey frowned deeply. "That looks like one of Alphys' machines," he observed. "Ya' think the comedian's trying to build a machine that'll make his jokes funny?"

"It's for something," said Frisk. "I asked him about it a couple'a days ago."

"And?"

"He told me a pun and then teleported away."

"Typical."

"What do you think it could be?"

"How in the hell am I supposed to know?"

"Language!"

"Don't make me teach you a bunch'a new words, you prude."

"What'sa prude?"

"Oh, forget it. Golly, you're dumb."

"I'd be smarter if you'd gimme some definitions!"

"Every time I give you some definitions you…mmmnf!"

He was once again cut off as Sans exited the shed and Frisk covered his mouth. Flowey released a muffled growl and glared at the human child even as Frisk's great brown eyes were pinned on the stout skeleton, who locked the door to the shed and proceeded to go back inside, no doubt to read Papyrus his mandatory bedtime story.

"Will you stop that?" snarled Flowey once Frisk removed his hand from over his mouth. "We're on the second floor and there's a window between us! He's not gonna hear us from here!"

"Was that a pun?" queried Frisk with an impish smile.

"No."

"You'd be surprised. He's got good ears…even though he doesn't have ears."

Frisk pressed his nose against the window, staring at the shed with an inquisitive and determined look that Flowey recognized and despised.

"Curiosity killed the Frisk," Flowey said in a singsong voice.

"Vines."

"Uhm…what?"

"You said sometime ago that you could solve Papyrus' puzzles, right? You got past some of Alpys' traps and Uncle Papyrus' puzzles in other timelines by using your vines and stuff, right?"

"Yes…"

"So…could you sneak into the shed and unlock…?"

"No…"

"I didn't say would I said could," said Frisk sneakily. Flowey huffed. Damn this kid: he couldn't deny it without selling himself short. Clever boy.

"Yes, I could. Easily."

"So…" Frisk batted his eyelashes in the cutest way he could. "Would you?"

Flowey, knowing full well that saying 'no' would just lead to more obnoxious whining and begging and pleading and crying from the boy, decided to get to the point. "Fine, but only because it'll inevitably get you in trouble."

Frisk kissed Flowey once more on one of his petals, causing the sentient flower to turn away in exasperated embarrassment while the boy bounded back to his bed.

"We'll go early in the morning," said Frisk. "Dad'll be at his third job."

Indeed, Sans had taken on a third job (if one counted his job at the illegal hot dog stand situated behind Undyne's house to be a 'job', which, officially, it was not) at one of Mettaton's restaurants on the weekends. They had to pay for Frisk's college fund somehow or another and both Sans and Toriel were quite sure that Temmie wasn't going to be paying back Frisk for his investment in her higher education anytime soon. (Though they had sold Frisk's temmie armor…back to Temmie, who bought it for three times its original price, so Temmie had ended up contributing to the college fund indirectly).

"Won't Toriel be awake?" Flowey pointed out. Frisk laughed.

"Doubt it," he said, "She'll be exhausted. She's gonna be at this parent-teacher meeting all night."

"Which brat is it this time?"

"Artie Johnson."

"That idiot?"

Frisk nodded.

"Didn't I already teach that kid a lesson?"

Frisk laughed. "Yeah: he still wets himself whenever he sees a buttercup."

"Good."

Frisk smiled goofily. "See? You do like me!"

"I do not. I wasn't defending you, stupid, I was defending my territory. I'm the only one who gets to try and murder you."

Frisk giggled. "G'night, Flowey. Adventure awaits tomorrow!"

"Joy," grumbled the flower before swiftly following the human child into slumberland.

BTW, a good way to make a quick buck in Undertale: buy a whole bunch of the 'cheap' Temmie Flakes (1G) and sell them right back to her. Usually she'll buy it for 2G, but occasionally you can get her to raise the price up to 6G. I got like 50G like that. Now I just need to figure out how to pay for gradschool…

Please review!