A/N: Prompted by anon on Tumblr with a crack prompt. Crack prompts lead to crack fics I Am Not Sorry.

"I was wondering what we should do today. I mean, isn't it such wonderful weather?" Alya asked, twirling around as she walked.

Marinette took in a huge breath. It wasn't just wonderful weather; the entire day just seemed so…miraculous. The sun was shining. They were let out of school with sanity relatively intact. It had all the makings of a Really Good Day.

Until someone went and rammed into her. Before she knew it, she was sprawled on to the floor. Her bag went flying and when it landed, its contents spilled onto the pavement. Whoever ran into her turned around and she held out a hand, thinking they were trying to help her get up.

She was wrong. The person stooped down and swiped her wallet. "Hey!" Marinette called out angrily, only to gasp when she realised that she recognised them. "Chat?!"

"Hello, Princess," he purred. "How fur-tunate I am to run into you," he winked and dashed off, tail high in the air.

Marinette jumped to her feet and pointed at his quickly retreating form. "Quick, catch that cat it stole my wallet!" she yelled out, before frowning and shaking her head at how unbelievably unbelievable that sounded out loud. She stuffed everything into her bag as she and Alya shot off as well.

It was almost like a game of cat and mouse; with the roles of cat and mouse interchangeable over time. Chat increased his speed when he felt like they were gaining on him and slowed down when they were about to lose him.

"We can catch him!" Marinette encouraged her friend, who was panting heavily by her side.

They rounded the corner and were met with a dead end. Marinette stared at it in despair as Alya turned the corner as well, phone held out straight before her.

"A dead end?" she panted, pointing the camera skywards.

"So it would seem," Marinette slumped on the wall and dropped onto the floor, putting her head on the heels of her hands. Was that really Chat Noir? Stealing her wallet, out of all things. Or could it be another CopyChat?

"Did Chat Noir seriously just steal my friend's wallet?" She heard her friend say to the camera, frowning in concern. "Has he decided to use his powers for evil, instead of by the side of Ladybug? I wish I had the answer, folks but I will keep you posted on it!"

Alya signed off and knelt next to her friend. "I'm sorry, Marinette. What did Chat Noir take?"

"Just my wallet; with some money, some photos and my student card," came the gloomy reply. She wasn't upset over the lost wallet (though she wished the photos weren't lost), but she was instead very upset over Chat. What in the world is wrong with him?

She considered ditching Alya and transforming when there was a crash behind them and Chat himself appeared at the mouth of the alleyway. "Now, don't tell me you ladies are stopping your purr-suit?" he winked again as Marinette shot to her feet.

"Quick, catch that cat it stole my wallet!" she found herself saying for the second time that day, frowning again at how ridiculous it still sounded.

And again they were in purrsu- pursuit. They chased him finally into a tiny plot of land about four feet square filled with wildflowers. Then Chat Noir turned around, making Marinette nearly colliding into him. Alya excitedly ran forward so she could shoot the both of them.

Marinette jumped away from him and frowned, before walking up to him and leaning forward so closely their noses almost touched.

"Why, Princess, I had no idea you were so fur-ward," he grinned as he ran a hand through her tousled hair. Her ribbons seem to have fallen off somewhere during the chase.

She just swatted at his hands in annoyance. "Just making sure you are who I think you are. Chat Noir, cease your cat burglary and hand me my wallet!"

"Okay."

"Okay?"

"Here. Cat-ch," he winked and clicked his tongue as he lobbed the wallet over to her. An easy catch.

She caught it easily. "What is the point of all this?" she asked, only to look up and find him gone.

"Find everything in your wallet?" Alya called from behind her phone.

A quick sweep showed that nothing was missing. She said so to her friend and Alya came over and zoomed into the wallet, to show that nothing was missing.


That night, Marinette turned her wallet over and over between her fingers, scrutinising it. What was the point of all that trouble? Why did he take her wallet? And why give it back later with nothing amiss? Marinette turned her wallet inside out, trying to find the answers to her questions.

And there it was. Among the photos of her parents and Alya was a small passport sized envelope that didn't look like it belonged there. She tore off the tape and slid out a passport sized photo. Of Chat Noir. Doing cat ears with his hands and with whiskers drawn on with a marker. Turning the picture over, she read the words, "Happy Valentine's, Purr-incess," in green ink and a tiny paw print.

Groaning loudly, Marinette banged her head onto her desk. Just then, her phone beeped with a text. It was from Mylène. It said, "Mon Dieu Marinette! Is it true about you and Chat Noir? I saw it on Alya's blog!"

Quick as a flash, she booted up her computer and went on Alya's blog.

"Chat Noir and Marinette?" glared back at her in black bolded letter and green paw prints on the is. Below it was the video of the chase and of the return of the wallet. When the video came to her standing almost nose to nose with Chat Alya had inserted the opening strains of Marvin Gaye's "Let's Get It On" with pink hearts around them. Underneath that was a short stub that simply said, "I ship it."

Marinette immediately typed in a text for Alya. "What was that all about Alya? What if Adrien SEES IT?"

To which Alya replied five minutes later with, "¯\_(ツ)_/¯"