A man with a broken soul
The white haired man put his head slowly on the cold wall from the hall and clenched a bit his teeth, then he closed his eye, covering with his eyelid his crimson iris. In this position he spent most of his time , rejecting the idea of getting up even if he were to be misjudged by his mistress' guests. He had learned how to ignore their sharp words, exactly as he was doing with his own life, which had lost the meaning for him, ever since he was adopted in this rich family.
Starting from that very moment a question was ruling his dark thoughts : Why am I, a sinner, treated with so much kindness? He used to make up the answer for this question by himself : The duchess is not in her right mind. She should have gotten rid of me ever since I told her about my identity. But she …
The man lifted his fist and hit the wall from his back powerfully, wishing to take out on something. Then his sight fell disinterested on his bloody fingers, that resulted from the blow. He was controlled by sadness, which was torturing him like a knife that stabbed his heart.
Miss Sinclair…please…forgive me… A tear crossed his cheek when on his mind appeared the painful memory of a blonde little girl, who begged him not to abandon her. His body was shaken by tears because of that horrible memory, which was haunting his dreams and from which he couldn't get away.
''Forgive me…forgive me. '' He muttered with bitter tears , not being able to hear the footsteps that headed towards him shyly. After some time, the steps paused exac tly near the man ruled by pain. He didn't raise his head to look into the eyes of the little silhouette that approached him. He remained with his look fixed on the floor, with his thoughts to that lonely little girl.
''Big brother Xerx?'' A crystallin voice of a child addressed him that inquiry filled with stupefaction.''Why are you crying?''
He didn't seem to hear her at the beginning, but after she mouthed the second question, his thoughts vanished and he was brought back to reality. She looked at him worriedly and didn't say anything more for quite some time. Again her? , he asked himself. The presence of the child seemed to irritate him on the moment. Why can't they all disappear and leave me alone?!
When she observed his wounds from his long and slim fingers, she looked at him with a frightened expression printed on her face and a shriek left her lips when she noticed the bloody stains from the wall. The man was frozen in that place because of her unexpected reaction. The little girl fell on her knees and started to cry. His look darkened and he kept looking at the little girl, hating himself for her tears.
''Damn it…M-Miss Sharon…please stop crying! You don't understand anything! Please just leave me alone!'' He yelled at the girl frustrated by her crying.
She looked at him full of amazement, hiccupping because of the tears.
''I just want to be alone…'' , he continued in a low voice and lifted his body from the floor, walking away from the girl. Sharon got up on her feet and followed his steps still hesitantly regarding the question she wanted to address to the man. Xerxes kept walking as being annoyed by the little girl, who was imitating his every step while following him behind his back. After some time, he stopped his footfalls and turned to face Sharon again. She studied him, too, but not with the same sad air, but with a calmer one. When the little girl observed his visage, a small smile flourished on hers.
''Are we playing tag?'' She asked with an unexpected glee.
Xerxes looked at her puzzled and didn't answer at first. But, after that, he made a grimace and yelled at the girl again:
''Hadn't I told you to leave me alone?''
She backed away a bit frightened by his attitude and kept her eyes on the man, who, increasing his steps, disappeared from the room, running. The little girl oscillated between following him, or leaving him alone as he wished. Eventually, plucking up her courage, she chose the first option and began her searching, dashing as well. When she opened the back door from the manor, her little silhouette bumped into a familiar one.
''Mister Reim !'' , shouted the little girl full of joy when she lifted her countenance and noticed the person's face.
''F-Forgive me, Miss Sharon'' He babbled. ''Are you hurrying somewhere?'' He added with curiousity.
''I am chasing big brother Xerx!'' She said a bit amazed by the question but still gleeful. ''I really need to catch him!''
After a moment of silence, she suggested : ''Mister Reim, help me to catch him!''
Reim stared at her slightly taken aback. He didn't feel right when he thought about the perturbation of the man's peace. What if he might act exactly as the first time they met? But he couldn't just let the little miss by herself in this tag game.
''A-Are you sure that is alright to do this? What if he wants to be left alone?''
Sharon pouted and grabbed Mister Reim's hand, dragging him through the garden .He tried his best to keep up with her fast steps, but it was clearly that all that running was tiring him badly. Meanwhile, Xerxes had stopped from hurrying away and now he was slowly strolling through the green land outside the Rainsworth manor. From that distance he could easily distinguish the silhouettes of his searchers, but, as always, he acted indifferently towards their presence.
''Xerxes Break!'' The voice of Reim resounded loudly, panting from all that racing .''Stay right there!''
Break was astonished by the request he had received, but after some seconds, he started to walk again listlessly.
''You shouldn't tell him to stay, Mister Reim ! ''Shouted the girl to the boy in a scolding tone. ''You should catch him! Come! ''
The little girl let go of the boy's hand and started to run in the man's direction. After the words he had heard, Xerxes froze in that place. She came closer to him and on that very moment he wished to run away, but before he could make this move, the little girl caught him in an embrace behind his back. After that, the man turned to study her, being amazed by her guffaw.
''I finally caught you!'' She exclaimed full of happiness. ''Now is your turn to catch me!''
''No way…'' He responded tiredly and sighed.
''Xerxes Break! '' Reim yelled when he eventually arrived near them. ''Play with her. She worked hard to find you.''
Xerxes drew his breath again and after that he glanced at the smiling face of Sharon. Wavering, he lifted his hand to pat her head. As his palm made contact with her caramel hair, he couldn't help but recall the moment when he used to pat the other girl he should have taken care of. The one he had failed to protect. The one whose future was destroyed by him.
No, he couldn't contemplate on it right now. Sharon resembled her, but only in the way she fondly looked for his attention. Somehow her presence was less disturbing than earlier. It made his heart easier of those stabbings the knife of his past left through it. Barely visible, a smile curled up his lips as he stared in her fuchsia eyes. The lively behavior of her almost offered him life as well.
''Alright, but just one time!'' He said with a raised finger, while he adopted a serious expression.
''Yay !'' The little girl exclaimed, jumping around full of joy and took the hand of her brother to show him their direction. The brunette remained alone for a while, guarding over their silhouettes from afar.
After all, Mistress Shelly was right. You have a good soul, Xerxes. Reim thought and let a kind smile to bloom on his countenance.