Sawada Tsunayoshi has no luck.

Why?

Because even though he was born under an insanely lucky star, he was also born under an equally unlucky one. It balanced out.

(Un)fortunately.

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Today was the happiest day in Sawada Iemitsu's life.

"You can do it, Nana darling! Push! Push! You're almost there-"

"Iemitsu." Nana gasped.

"Yes, honey? What-"

"Shut up."

Don't mess with a woman while they are giving birth.

...

"Congratulations, Nana-san, Iemitsu-san. You have a healthy son."

Nana took the child from the doctor, absolutely glowing with happiness. "Look, Iemitsu~ He's adorable!"

She didn't need to bother. The young lion of Vongola had completely melted into goo. "Daaaaaww" He gently brushed Tsuna's face with his fingers. The baby grabbed a finger and began to drool over it. Iemitsu mentally exploded.

"Tsunayoshi." Nana gently brushed his head. "May you be blessed with the greatest of luck and the strongest of bonds." Tsuna gurgled. "Welcome to the world, Tsunayoshi."

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Bond #1

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On October 14 19XX, Sawada Tsunayoshi saw the world for the first time.

Or rather, he saw the hospital room, a few doctors, and nurses, an exhausted but overjoyed Nana and a mentally-broken-due-to-cuteness-overload Iemitsu. Close enough.

He didn't know who or where he was or anything else for that matter. He only knew one thing.

He was hungry.

So he kept hold of the closest thing that touched him, which happened to be Iemitsu's shirt.

(Un)fortunately.

...

Tsuna was a prodigy, a child genius... at religiously following his instincts.

He never quite understood these instincts but he knew, with every inch of his being, that they were never wrong.

(With 'right' having various meanings.)

And these instincts led him to make the following ironic association:

No weird-looking-blond-man = no food

Ironic in a sense that it was always his mother who fed him. His father just happened to be also in the room every time. Well... not exactly 'just happened to be', but more in the sense of the fact that the baby latched onto his shirt every single time he was fed. It was a self-fulfilling prophecy.

And Sawada Iemitsu, the Young Lion of Vongola, head of CEDEF and External Adviser to the strongest and bloodiest mafia Famiglia in the world, had no defenses against cuteness.

He lost before he even entered the battlefield.

...

Iemitsu dutifully stayed by his wife's side throughout the first week of Tsuna's existence.

Of course he did.

He didn't have much time after all.

As much as Iemitsu wanted to stay with his wife and son forever, he kind of had a mafia famiglia to run. He kind of had stacks of paperwork waiting for him and kind of had missions he needed to deal with. In other words, he was kind of really busy.

At the end of the first week, the fantasy had to end...

"I'm sorry Nana. I need to get back to work."

Sawada Nana was a very understanding and passive woman. She had to be, or else she wouldn't have had married Iemitsu in the first place.

So she simply smiled sadly and nodded. "Alright. I love you, darling."

Iemitsu kissed her. "I love you too. I'll call you soon."

Sawada Tsunayoshi was neither understanding nor passive. Why would he be? His food was leaving.

And that was how Iemitsu found his son's tiny hands clenched on his shirt like a parasite. A brief tug from the shirt's owner started the waterworks.

"Son, it's alright. I'll come back soon." The new father, not wanting to hurt his son, was unwilling to use any more force to free himself. He hopelessly looked over to his wife for help.

Sawada Nana was a very understanding and passive woman. She understood what would happen if she left the father and son duo be and passively feigned sleeping.

The first battle Iemitsu lost in decades was against his son. It was a battle he would continue to lose for the rest of his life.

The Young Lion of Vongola did not go back.

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(In a world where Tsuna held onto something else, Iemitsu would have left.)

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Bond #2

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"YOU IDIOT! WHAT ARE YOU STILL DOING HERE?"

"Master, I am so glad you are alright."

"Why did you ignore all our calls? We thought something happened to you."

Lal Mirch, Tumeric and Oregono fell silent as Iemitsu held a finger over his lips and continued to cradle his son. Tsuna squirmed slightly but (un)fortunately didn't wake up and cry.

"I am a father now."

Lal rolled her eyes. "Yes, we can see that. Now get back to work."

Iemitsu held his son tighter. "I am a father now."

Tumeric saw the vein almost popping on Lal's head and decided to step up before it explodes. "Master, you are also the Young Lion of Vongola, boss of CEDEF. We need you."

"You know, in the wild, male lions stayed back to care for the cubs while the females hunted."

"..." Oregono and Tumeric quickly took the baby from an unwilling Iemitsu's arms and hurried out of the room, gently closing the door behind them.

Lal erupted.

...

The failed rain arcobaleno headed downstairs after her lava cooled, leaving Iemitsu behind in an indescribable mess.

"Ara, you must be Lal-san. Thank you for taking care of my husband."

Lal nodded back. Sawada Nana did not even bat an eye at her infant state. She was either a very good actress or an accepting fool. Judging by Iemitsu's description of her, she was probably the latter.

"The three of you are here to take Iemitsu back, right?" The woman hummed. She knew this would happen sooner or later. "I'm sorry that he's so difficult sometimes."

The rest of Lal's fire died. While she had never personally witnessed it, she was certain that taking care of a child was very difficult. Much more so alone. "I'll make sure he comes back soon."

"Thank you." Nana smiled genuinely before sitting onto the floor, baby still cradled in her arms. "Would you like to hold Tsu-kun?"

"I'd rather not." Lal shuffled awkwardly, gesturing her small stature. "I might drop him."

"Nonsense. I trust you, Lal-san."

Trust wasn't the issue- The infant found a baby, only slightly smaller than herself, in her arms seconds later.

The baby was still asleep, unconsciously cuddling against her cheek for more warmth.

(It would be important to note that this was the first time Lal Mirch had held a genuine baby in her life.

The Combusin trainer stared at the tiny bundle of life in her arms. Life at its most vulnerable stage.

Something awoke within her.

(Un)fortunately.)

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(In a world where Tsuna burst into tears and wailed loudly, Lal would have become highly irritated and dragged Iemitsu off immediately.)

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Bond #3

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The next time Iemitsu woke up, he was again staring straight into an infuriated Lal Mirch's eyes.

"L-lal?" The cowardly lion stuttered.

Lal stared at him with disgust. "Sawada Iemitsu. Why did you give birth to a child when you are clearly not ready?" She growled. "You should have been more than aware of the consequences of your actions. You are the leader of CEDEF. You don't have time to raise a child."

Iemitsu turned solemn. "I know. I just wanted Nana to be happy. I didn't want her to be alone when I was gone."

"You are a stubborn fool. Did you forget about the burden of raising a child? All alone? Even if you provide her financial support, she would still have a hard time. Not to mention Tsunayoshi will grow up essentially without a strong fatherly figure in his life. Is that what you wanted?"

The man groaned, head falling into his arms. "...What should I do, Lal?"

"Stop being such a fool."

...

"Nana!"

Everyone watched as Iemitsu walked into the room, a very determined look in his eyes.

His wife momentarily hugged Tsuna a bit tighter before setting him down in his cradle. She smiled knowingly. "Are you leaving now? Have a safe trip."

The man continued his stride right up to his wife. He held her shoulders. "Let's move to Italy."

This took Nana by complete surprise. "Italy?"

Oregono and Tumeric were also just as confused. "Boss?"

"It's only going to be temporary." The head of CEDEF continued, ignoring the looks he was receiving. "My work, I am the CEO of a company in Italy so I can't quit right now, but I will after I get a suitable replacement. We can move right back here afterward. It will only take a few years at most."

"I..." Nana needed a moment to digest this information. "I would love to move to Italy, but..." She sheepishly smiled. "I don't know any Italian."

Iemitsu smiled broadly and kissed his wife. "Oregono, Tumeric and Lal will help you when I am not around. Tumeric, go prepare a flight for tomorrow. Oregono, help Nana pack." He let go of Nana after giving her another hug. "Tuna-fishy~" He picked up his son and began spinning the baby around in the room. "Guess what? You're going to Italy!"

Tsuna didn't care less where he was going or what Italy was. He just knew that he was feeling very dizzy and wanted it to stop. And so he feebly grabbed on to his father's hands for stability.

Somehow, the dumb lion of Vongola took that as a sign of agreement. He cuddled his face against his son's. "Yes! Italy!"

All this time, Lal Mirch stayed uncharacteristically silent.

AN: Experimental fic. I have a couple plot bunnies but I'm not too sure how to proceed. W/e. It will be fun either way.

Thank you for reading~

Next up: Iemitsu storms into Vongola with his resignation letter in hand.

Edit: There were a few minor things that I wanted to change, mostly language.