Disclaimer: I don't own Gravity Falls or 'what I learned today'. Also, pointing out; everything here is meant to be a joke. Don't take it too seriously, m'kay?
What I learned today:
Gravity Falls
1. Tourist Trapped – Spend all your time inside reading when you know your parents sent you up here to go outside and get some exorcise for a change. Lazy kid.
2. Legend of the Gobblewonker – Crazy old people are kind of awesome!
3. Headhunters – Whoa, shit just got real!
4. The Hand That Rocks The Mabel – Do stuff yourself, stop getting others to do your dirty work!
5. The Inconveniencing – Sometimes 'baby stuff' can save your stupid teenage asses.
6. Dipper Vs. Manliness – Puberty comes eventually, you can't induce it with murder.
7. Double Dipper – Girls don't go for nerds, be authentic.
8. Irrational Treasure – Even a broken clock is right twice a day, I guess.
9. The Time Travelers Pig – Time travel? That shit's dangerous, be careful!
10. Fight Fighters – Fight your own battles or get beaten up. What's it gonna be?
11. Little Dipper – Getting mad because your sister's entering puberty sooner? You're a guy, fuck you!
12. Summerween – Halloween is fucking scary!
13. Boss Mabel – Say 'please', jackass!
14. Bottomless Pit – Dah! Evil pinball!
15. The Deep End – Public pool managers are fucking insane!
16. Carpet Diem – Siblings fight a lot, but they'll still love each other. Most of the time.
17. Boyz Crazy – If you really care about something, let it go.
18. The Land Before Swine – Jurassic Park logic. We haz it!
19. Dreamscapers – When a page is spattered with fucking blood, heed the words!
20. Gideon Raises – Shit blows the fuck up!
21. Scaryoak – Some people sing so bad it kills zombies.
22. Into The Bunker – Friendship is better than romantic relationships.
23. The Golf War – Fighting is wrong unless it's against the right people.
24. Sock Opera – Don't make a deal with the bad guy, you moron!
25. Soos And The Real Girl – Get your lazy ass off the computer and go meet real people.
26. Little Gift Shop Of Horrors – Don't piss off the witch, man.
27. The Society Of The Blind Eye – Hirch lied to us! With a lie!
28. Blenden's Game – A tiny head-mustache fixes all of life's problems.
29. Love God – Love potions...Actually work? Somethin's not right about this.
30. Northwest Mansion Mystery – Just because your family's a bunch of villeins doesn't mean you have to be.
31. Not What He Seems – Jumping to conclusions destroy bonds.
32. The Tale Of Two Stans – Your brother loves you; stop being such a Goddamn teenager!
33. Dungeons, Dungeons And More Dungeons – Give new things a chance or else they'll come to life and take your brother. Note to self; stop trying new things.
34. The Stanchurian Candidate – Stan is totally best Gruncle!
35. The Last Mabelcorn – Don't kill yourself over other people's standards.
36. Roadside Attraction – In relationships, no matter what happens, it's always the guys fault.
37. Dipper And Mabel Vs. The Future – Hope your happy Ford, your insistence on keeping secretes has lead to the end the world!
38. Wierdmageddon Pt. 1 – Holy Balls, these animators were wasted!
39. Wierdmageddon Pt. 2: Escape From Reality – Life sucks! Deal with it!
40. Wierdmageddon Pt. 3: Gravity Falls Finale – Pulling out a hiatus with only one episode left? Disney's is bunch of bungholes!
'What I learned today' is a satirical look at morals from MLP episodes. Thought it'd be fun to apply it to Gravity Falls. And it was. Review.