Dan and Nick own Victorious and iCarly. The New Orleans Pelicans and the Miami Heat belong to the National Basketball Association (NBA) and their respective owners.

This is a last-minute attempt at a Christmas fic. To say that I winged this, good GOD, you will not hear or read a bigger understatement for the rest of the year, which shouldn't take long since 2016 is just a week away from today. But anyway, here goes "André Gets Crushed On Christmas". Enjoy.

(Christmas Day 2015 (Friday December 25), Los Angeles)

It was 9:30 on Christmas morning, and 21-year-old singer/actor/writer André Harris was nestled in the comfort of the couch that was in the living room of his studio apartment. Later on in the day, he was supposed to be in the Hollywood Hills as his best friend Tori Vega and her older sister Trina had invited him and other friends of theirs to come to their old home for a Christmas party. The request was easy to accept, as the group continued to hang out together even after their departure from Hollywood Arts High School.

Right now, though, André was lounging around as he was watching the basketball game between the New Orleans Pelicans and the Miami Heat. The live broadcast had went to a commercial break because of a timeout, and it was then that he heard the strums of guitar strings similar to a ringtone he once had on his PearPhone, meaning that someone was ringing his doorbell. The dreadlocked black tank top and red sweatpants wearing musician was surprised at the sound as he stood up from his couch and walked to the door.

"I know it's Christmas, but who could it be at this hour?" André asked in slight confusion, since he hadn't expected to see anyone face-to-face until the party later in the day. Instead of complaining or further contemplating the situation, he simply went to greet the person on the other end, and although he didn't mind their presence, he was surprised by who and what he saw.

"Jade?"

"Merry Christmas, buddy," the young woman at the door said in an usually cheerful tone even in spite of her change in personality since reaching adulthood. Said woman was fellow 21-year-old writer/actress/singer and Hollywood Arts graduate Jade West, who had known and been best friends with André since their freshman year. The ex-Goth was standing at his door in a modest but still sexy and seductively tight red dress, thin-strapped black heels, and her black/dark brown hair was stylishly curled. And she was holding a stainless steel vacuum bottle with a red ribbon wrapped around the area just under the lid.

Meanwhile, André looked at Jade while they were still at his door and said, "not that I mind you being here, but, you know, why exactly are you here?"

"So I can't visit one of my best friends on Christmas morning?" Jade asked with a slight laugh. "That's not a very good holiday spirit."

"Yeah, you could. It's just that I wasn't planning to see you until the party, which is this afternoon."

"Okay, I know it's early, but I needed to talk to you about something important. So are you gonna let me in or not?"

"Now there's the Jade West I know and love," André said jokingly after hear Jade say the last part in a slightly commanding tone, which was met in return with a smile.

The pair walked through the apartment and into the living room, where Jade sat next to André on the couch he had been on before she showed up. Once they were seated, he turned and looked at her before saying, "okay, so what brings you by this morning? I know you said that you wanted to visit one of your best friends on Christmas, and even if that's true, I know it's not that simple. So what's up?"

"Well, for one, I wanted to give you one of your presents before the party," Jade said before picking up the vacuum bottle and handing it to André.

"Thanks (I wonder what this is)," André said while wondering about the possible drink inside. "There's not anything poisonous in this, is it?"

"No, Harris, there isn't," Jade said with a slightly annoyed voice. "Now, out of everyone I know, why would I wanna poison you?"

"You tell me, West."

"Just open the bottle and see what the drink is."

"Alright then." Andre twisted the large lid off of the bottle before taking the small black lid from the bottle as well. He then poured the drink in the large lid - which was also meant to serve as a makeshift mug - and took a sip of the dark beverage. Once he finished, he let out a muffled but still loud "mmm", which may have been because of how hot the drink was, but was also largely because of how good it tasted, and his reaction led to Jade laughing flashing a wide smile.

"So, what do you think?" Jade asked as she saw André put the lid down.

"Was that cocoa?" André asked enthusiastically.

"Yeah, it sure was."

"Man, that cocoa is good."

"Maybe because the cocoa is from Belgium."

"That's Belgium cocoa?! Oh thank you, girl! How'd you know I like Belgium cocoa?!" André asked, feeling as happy as the many kids around the world who got the toy that they wanted.

"Well, that's actually what I wanted to talk to you about," Jade said. "See, a few weeks ago, me and Tori, we were hanging at the Vega's place while Trina and Freddie were out together, and we... we were drinking, and we started talking about old times, particularly some of the things that happened while we were at Hollywood Arts. Eventually, the Friday night concert and '365 Days' came up, and Tori, she must have had more alcohol in her system than I did in mine, because she started telling me everything about that week."

"So that means she told you about my crush," André said in a slighty embarrassed manner.

"Yeah, she did. You know, you could have told me instead," Jade answered in a devious tone. "It's better to hear news straight from the source."

"How could I have told you, Jade? You were still with Beck back then, and you... I don't know how you would have taken it. You might have flipped out and Lord knows what would have happened after that."

"So you were scared that I would hurt you somehow? I thought I was 'pretty and sweet'," Jade joked, making a reference to how André described her to Tori when he was half a step away from a nervous breakdown at the Vega house just hours after he and Jade were done with their studio session at Hollywood Arts.

"Well, when we were in the studio, and you did the thing that made my hand tingly, and we finally recorded something, you were. But even with that in mind, it was still hard to say anything."

"So you were afraid to talk about your crush? Did I scare you?"

"Well, back then, you scared everybody. You wanted to kill Sinjin just because he sat on your scissors."

"Yeah, maybe killing him wouldn't have been the right thing," Jade began. "But even now, I take my scissors seriously. You should know that."

"I do know that," André began. "The point is, you weren't as inviting and nice back then as you are now. And even with that in mind, it was still hard to tell you that I have a crush on you."

"Well, maybe you could have said something once I became single, instead of asking out other girls, or, I don't know, paying other guys so they could ask me out."

"Okay, I asked out other girls because I thought I was over my crush on you, and the whole thing about paying a guy to ask you out, yeah, that was stupid, but that wasn't entirely my fault."

"Oh, so it wasn't your idea to give someone money to ask me out for a date? Did you and Tori suddenly decide to become pimps and not tell me that I would be your first whore?" Jade asked in an irritated manner.

"Okay, that last part you just mentioned, that wasn't happening at all," André began. "But I do own up to saying that a guy would only ask you out if we paid them. I was just brainstorming out loud. Tori actually decided to go through it, and better yet, she came to me for help in the first place just so Beck could ask out Meredith. Or do you not remember any of that?"

"Yeah, I do remember, actually," Jade replied with a hint of sass. "Or do you not remember me threatening you two when you called yourselves hiding from me in the janitor's closet?"

"Yeah, I remember that. Seriously, how could you have possibly killed us with toilet paper?"

"Oh, trust me, I could have figured it out somehow. A bunch of prison inmates could vouch for that."

"I'm sure they could," André replied. "But really, Jade, what the hell does any of this have to with me having a crush on you, aside from the fact that you know about it now because Tori told you? I mean, what..."

Before André got any further in his sentence, Jade leaned in and suddenly began kissing him, and while he took a few seconds to react because of shock, he gladly returned it to the coffee and scissor loving brunette.

"Okay, what was that about?" André asked in surprise after he and Jade broke apart.

"Maybe I have a crush on you too," Jade replied in a low tone as she looked in André's eyes.

"Since when?"

"Okay, does it really matter?"

"Well, seeing as how you sat here and interrogated me about my crush on you, yeah, I kind of think it does."

"Look, we have a few hours before Tori and Trina's party. Now are you gonna sit here and question me about my crush, or are we gonna - "

Just as she had done to him moments earlier, just as Jade was about to finish her sentence, André went and kissed her, and he heard a slight squeal of pleasure as he got on top of her, which caused her to lie down against the back of the couch. He stood back up, but it was so that he could pick her up , and as he did so, Jade wrapped her arms and legs around André's neck and waist to hold on to him as he took her to his bedroom.

About 10 or 15 minutes later, André and Jade were both undressed and lying in his bed, and she was on top of him as they were engaged in the 69 position. Jade had been doing as much as she could to keep him pleased, but as she continued to suck him, André kept on licking her, as he licked in and around both of her openings. The magic touch that Jade thought André had with his tongue was working her over, as she gasped and moaned at every lick, suck and swirl that her friend was dishing out.

"So am I still pretty and sweet?" Jade asked with a laugh once she was able to form a coherent sentence.

"Mmmm-hmmm," André replied in a muffled tone because of his oral display. Once he took his mouth off of Jade, he then continued by saying, "you taste better than Belgium cocoa."

After laughing at André's comment, Jade said to herself, "maybe drinking and giving up secrets with Tori wasn't such a bad idea after all."

Welp, that's it. It's not my best work, and it wasn't my first idea for today, but this is the only thing that stuck in the end. Hopefully you enjoy this like you enjoy whatever holiday you celebrate, although I have my doubts. I know people might have a lot of grievances with this fanfic. That's for those of y'all that partake in Festivus. But anyway, Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays. Be safe, have fun, and give somebody a better gift than a cricket. Peace.