Sometimes, she hopes they never stop. The thought is always at the back of her mind, even as she pushes him onto his bed to straddle him, and the pleasure is all she can think about.

Having sex with someone like Kylo was unexpected. Initially, she expected him to be average, just one and done. The actual outcome was surprising, but obviously welcome. He had the cheesiest pick up lines, but he was attractive, in a certain way, and she was frustrated after working on the same car all morning. Sex would relieve her of that tension. And sex with Kylo was definitely a great way to relieve any tension. Her boss, Han Solo, wouldn't have minded if she left early. He was like the father she never had.

Kylo was older than her. Not that she minded. His years seemed to add to his experience. For her first no-strings-attached relationship, it was turning out to be fine. She could dream about wanting more out of it, but it'd just be wishful thinking. Kylo deserved someone closer to his own age, not a young girl who just dreams of vast oceans and leafy green islands. It's these thoughts that lead her to deciding to end it with him. She would always have the four weeks they were together. She liked the way his hair was always effortlessly messy. She liked the way he moaned her name. She even liked his cheesy jokes and pick up lines. Would it be selfish to have sex with him one more time before ending it?

It's 2 days before Christmas.

Rey: I need to see you.

Kylo: My place, 20 minutes. ;)

Kylo drove home from work in record time. It was nearly the holidays anyway. His heart beating fast with excitement. He probably shouldn't be this excited at the thought of seeing her. By the time he sprinted to his door, Rey was already there waiting. Her hair was in a unique ponytail with three loops at the back, and she stood by the door, tapping away at her phone.

"Hey." Kylo breathed. He leaned against the wall, trying to disguise the fact that he ran up six flights of stairs.

"Hi." Rey slipped her phone into her back pocket. There was something different about her.

"Why didn't you let yourself in?" She has a key. He gave her one just in case.

Rey opened her mouth, but closed it after a moment.

It's her eyes. Kylo noticed that instead of their usual bright hue, her eyes have darkened to a dull brown. That's not good.

"Hey. What's wrong?" He stepped closer, closing the gap between them. He reached for her face, but she turned away, avoiding his touch.

"We have to talk about something."That's never a good sign, is it?

Kylo's mind raced, trying to think of what she might say. She's figured out he's Han Solo's son. She's realized that she can do better and she's ending it.

"I know." He knew this day would come. But he thought he would have had more time.

Rey looked up at him, relief and another emotion he can't place written on her face.

"We should-"

"This can't-"

"You go-"

"No, you-"

"I think we should end this." They said at the same time.

Moments passed, with the two of them staring into each other's eyes.

"Can I at least have one last kiss?" It's Kylo, who broke the silence. Rey silently obliged, leaning up and pressing her lips to his. She still tasted like mint.

Christmas Day

Every Christmas, the Skywalker-Solo family would have a big dinner to celebrate. Even if it was just his uncle, dad's best friend, and his parents, his mother insisted on having everyone together for Christmas. Kylo was definitely not in the mood to celebrate this year. He missed Rey. A ridiculous thought, because it was a mutual agreement to end things. Even if he wished that they could have been together for longer, been something more.

"Ben, can you set the table?" His uncle, Luke, asked. Ben. He didn't like that name. Ben was the name of a child, boring and weak. Kylo was the name of someone powerful, like he is now.

"Sure." He wasn't in the mood for anything, but his mom would be disappointed if he just sat around skulking.

"Set six places!" Han called from the kitchen.

"Why?" Five. There were only ever five at Christmas.

"You'll find out later!" Kylo rolled his eyes. His dad was so weird sometimes.

"I have a bad feeling about this." He mumbled to himself. As if the gods heard and wanted to torture him some more, the doorbell rang.

"Ben, can you get the door?" Leia, his mother, asked. The whole family was busy with preparing for the dinner.

Wordlessly, Kylo opened the door, only to find Rey standing there. She had her hair loose around her shoulders, and wore a sleeveless black dress that reached mid thigh. She looked beautiful.

"Rey?" His heart was beating rapidly in his chest, and he was worried his normally deep voice would crack at the sight of her. "What are you doing here?"

"I should ask you the same thing. Han invited me for Christmas dinner at his house." She was not expecting to see the man she had just ended things with at Han Solo's house.

"Rey! You made it!" His mother walked up to hug Rey. In shock, Kylo could only step back and watch.

"Thank you for inviting me! I didn't know what to bring, so I just brought some wine, if that's okay?" Rey held up a bag, with a Christmas bow on the side of it.

"Oh, you're too sweet. Han said that you didn't have any Christmas plans, of course we're not going to let you be alone on Christmas." Leia smiled. "I'll bring this into the kitchen; you can just talk to my son, Ben. Dinner is almost ready." She took the bag from Rey and walked away from the two.

"Ben?" Rey turned to glare at him. Before anyone else could interrupt, he quickly ushered her into the empty lounge.

"It's my birth name, Benjamin Solo." He admitted. "I go by Kylo Ren, usually. It's less embarrassing."

"Right. Kylo Ren is less embarrassing than Ben Solo." She barely restrained herself from rolling her eyes. "And you lied! You never told me Han Solo was your dad."

"It's not a lie, just something that I didn't think was necessary to mention. It's not like we did a lot of talking anyway." He smirked at the memory of all the times they were together. Rey seemed to soften at that.

She stepped closer, tilting her head up to look at him. If he just leaned down, he could kiss her. His eyes flickered down to her lips, then back up to her eyes. His heart was pounding in his chest so loudly, he was sure she could hear it.

"Ben! Rey! Dinner!" Leia called from the dining room, and Rey hurried past him.

Dinner was awkward. Han sat next to Leia, and across from Chewie. Luke sat across from Leia, leaving Rey and Kylo facing each other. He stared at his plate, silently shoving mashed potatoes and turkey into his mouth to avoid being pulled into a conversation. Rey, seated next to his dad, was engaged in an animated conversation about the importance of decarbonisation. Occasionally, he felt her staring at him, silently willing him to look at her. He was afraid that if he met her gaze, he would break down and confess his true feelings.

"So Rey, do you have a boyfriend?" His mother's question caused Kylo's heart to stutter. Oh god, not now.

Rey hesitated briefly, before answering. "Actually, I was seeing someone, but it didn't work out." Kylo looked up, focusing on a spot on the wall by her shoulder.

"I liked him a lot, but I guess he didn't feel the same way." They seemed to stare at each other for ages, until Rey looked away.

After dinner, the adults went to talk and catch up in the living room, leaving Rey and Kylo with the task of cleaning the dishes. She insisted.

It was a painfully awkward silence. He washed, while she dried. It could almost be something cute, if not for their situation.

Clearing his throat, he spoke first. "You liked me?"

She seemed to anticipate the question. "Still do, actually."

"Then why-"

"Why did you?" Rey stopped drying to turn to face him.

"You deserve someone better than me." He mumbled, choosing to stare at the dish he'd been washing for the past few minutes. "You should get to be young and have fun with someone your own age."

"That's not something for you to decide." She pointed an accusing finger at him. "I liked being with you because you were something good. But I just thought it'd be better if you had something more concrete with someone else. Hypocritical, I know." Her cheeks were tinged with pink.

"Rey." He didn't know she felt that way. And he knew he fucked up.

"Forget it." She turned to leave. Not this time. Kylo grabbed her hand and pulled her toward him. He leaned down and pressed his lips to hers. His heart is leaping with joy. Her hands reached up to rest on his face and at the back of his neck. His wet hands moved to her hips, creating a wet patch on her dress. Her tongue pushes into his mouth, gliding over his teeth. They're desperate kisses, filled with longing, making up for the miscommunication. He thought he heard her moan his given name, but coming from her, he didn't mind. A particularly loud laugh from Luke caused them to separate. They were both breathing heavily, but never tore their eyes away from each other. His forehead rested against hers.

"Do you want to just get out of here?" He couldn't stop himself from grinning.

"I thought you'd never ask." Kylo ran past the living room with Rey in hand, calling out a goodbye, the pair hardly able to keep their hands off of each other.

"...What the hell just happened?" A confused Han asked his wife, who only smiled knowingly.