So here it is. My last will and testament or whatever. Okay, so I don't
really have any possessions to leave, I did run out of Sunnydale in kind of
a hurry, but I feel like I at least owe everyone an explanation. I know it
won't make up for what I did, but I want everyone, especially Willow, to
know how sorry I am. I know it will never be enough, but maybe it'll help
a little.
Andrew is snoring in the cot across the room. He finally fell asleep about
an hour ago, and now he's tossing and turning, probably having the dream
again. I have the dream, well, nightmare, every night now, and I'm
becoming resigned to the fact that we have to return to Sunnydale, even if
it means our gruesome deaths. Hopefully I can talk to Buffy before that
happens. If I could just explain what I think is going on, maybe I could
join her and get myself out of the dark side. I'm sick of being a Storm
Trooper. I always forgot that they never won. And Darth always used them
as a shield.
Speaking of Warren, I still can't believe he's dead. It's more impossible
for me to believe that Willow killed him. Willow was always my friend.
She was always happy and nice and, well, Willow-like. Sure, she's drifted
away since college, but so has everyone else. Willow was the only person I
thought would always say hi to me and forgive me no matter how much I
screwed up.
I don't blame her, though. If I had a girlfriend and someone killed her,
I'd be pretty mad too. I'm definitely not as powerful with the magic as
her, but I'm sure I could think of some revenge scheme.
Hmm. Andrew's mumbling something about Warren again. Every night, when he
thinks I'm asleep, he talks to Warren. I think he actually sees him, and
even hears him talking back. It's creepy, but, at the same time, oddly
comforting. I know that Andrew was in love with Warren, and I'm cool with
that. If he stays sane a little longer by chatting with his dead friend,
then I'll not stop him.
Where was I? Oh, yeah, explaining. Well, I guess I should go back to the
beginning before I get bogged down in the present angst.
What is the beginning? Well, I guess I could start with growing up in
Sunnydale, or all the times I hung out with Willow and Xander and Jesse,
before they became a little too cool for me. No, I think I'll start at the
true beginning. Because what is a supervillain without his archnemesis?
I'll start with Buffy.
In a town as small as Sunnydale, new kids stick out. Of course, Buffy tends to stick out more than most. The first time I saw her she was at the Bronze, wearing one of those little dresses she used to wear. I remember thinking she was very pretty, but back in those days I tended to focus a little too much on Cordelia, so Buffy kinda slipped past my radar. I know I said something to her that first time. Knowing me, it was probably something lame, but hey, at least I talked to her. I knew that she was hanging out with Willow, but I just figured she needed to get caught up in school. Imagine my surprise when this obviously formerly popular girl decided to become friends with people who were actually nice to me. I should have known something was up with her right then.
I know this is a horrible thing to say, but I never thought it would last. I heard she was trying out for cheerleader, and I thought she would make it and that would be the end of it. You can't be a cheerleader and hang out with Willow at the same time. It's just not done. Well, okay, I also heard that she saved Willow's life and that Willow would have died right along with Jesse if she hadn't been there. But I assumed that was just a rumor. It's not like Buffy was any bigger than Jesse. If Jesse couldn't fight it off, how could Buffy possibly. That was, of course, before I knew the big secret. Speaking of Jesse, it was such a shock when I heard about his disappearance. I knew something was off with him those last days before he was gone. I saw him hitting on Cordelia at the Bronze, and when she actually danced with him, well, I couldn't decide if I was proud that she would be nice to someone who almost shared my level, or if I should be mad at him for getting to be that close to her. He seemed so different then. That was right before that huge scary guy took over the club and started killing people. Which, you may think, would be a huge traumatizing story that I would focus on, but growing up in Sunnydale, well, I've seen much weirder. Hell, I've caused much weirder. But we'll get to that later. The important thing about that night was that I finally noticed how strong Buffy was. She fought that guy off and managed to save the day. I didn't see the actual fight, but I assume, based on what I know now, that she staked him with something. Everyone else seemed to be in denial about what had gone on. Cordelia thought it was a biker gang and Buffy knew them from LA. Larry said that he fought off most of them (he was actually crying in the corner the whole time). The only ones who kept quiet about it were Buffy, Willow, and Xander. And me. I knew something big was happening, I just had no idea what.
I knew it also involved the new librarian, but I couldn't for the life of me figure out how. The three of them spent almost all their free time hanging out in the library with him, doing, well, I didn't exactly know. It looked to be some sort of research. With Willow involved, I'm sure it was. One time my class partner and I went in to get a book, and it was like we were interrupting some heavy discussion. A minute later, when I came back out from the stacks, they were all gone. Something was definitely not right in book land. I would have investigated further right then, but it's not like I didn't have my own stuff to deal with.
So much strange stuff happened that year. Cordelia went blind, Principal Flutie got eaten, everyone's worst nightmares started, well, being real, my science teacher disappeared and I'm pretty sure he was murdered. A couple of kids entered the talent show, and subsequently died. Basically, a whole lotta death. I found out a few years later, that even Buffy had her share.
But I was still alive. And still suspicious. Nothing much happened over the summer, which might have had something to do with Buffy being out of town on vacation. Okay, it almost definitely did. I was actually looking forward to the new school year, if only to figure out what exactly was going on. And to watch Cordelia from afar. She really was amazing back then. Probably still is. I hear she moved to LA to become an actress. When she hits the big time, I'll be able to tell people that I went to high school with her, and was even her slave for a week. But we'll get to that later. It's getting kind of late. I should probably stop for now. I'll hide this under my cot and hope that Andrew doesn't go snooping. I'm not sure what he would do if he found it, but I don't really want to find out. Even though Warren is dead, I think he can still tell Andrew what to do. Luckily, he needs me until we get back to Sunnydale and do what we have to do. Until then, I think I'm safe. I know he'll turn on me the first chance he gets, but hopefully I can do some good before that. Something to fix this mess we've made. God, how do you fix this? People are dead. This can't be fixed. But maybe it could be made better. Or at least less bad. Who knows. I'm gonna sleep now. I'll continue tomorrow night. And maybe I'll write about the girls in our nightmares. And the prophecy, once I translate it. I really should have taken Spanish in high school.
I'll start with Buffy.
In a town as small as Sunnydale, new kids stick out. Of course, Buffy tends to stick out more than most. The first time I saw her she was at the Bronze, wearing one of those little dresses she used to wear. I remember thinking she was very pretty, but back in those days I tended to focus a little too much on Cordelia, so Buffy kinda slipped past my radar. I know I said something to her that first time. Knowing me, it was probably something lame, but hey, at least I talked to her. I knew that she was hanging out with Willow, but I just figured she needed to get caught up in school. Imagine my surprise when this obviously formerly popular girl decided to become friends with people who were actually nice to me. I should have known something was up with her right then.
I know this is a horrible thing to say, but I never thought it would last. I heard she was trying out for cheerleader, and I thought she would make it and that would be the end of it. You can't be a cheerleader and hang out with Willow at the same time. It's just not done. Well, okay, I also heard that she saved Willow's life and that Willow would have died right along with Jesse if she hadn't been there. But I assumed that was just a rumor. It's not like Buffy was any bigger than Jesse. If Jesse couldn't fight it off, how could Buffy possibly. That was, of course, before I knew the big secret. Speaking of Jesse, it was such a shock when I heard about his disappearance. I knew something was off with him those last days before he was gone. I saw him hitting on Cordelia at the Bronze, and when she actually danced with him, well, I couldn't decide if I was proud that she would be nice to someone who almost shared my level, or if I should be mad at him for getting to be that close to her. He seemed so different then. That was right before that huge scary guy took over the club and started killing people. Which, you may think, would be a huge traumatizing story that I would focus on, but growing up in Sunnydale, well, I've seen much weirder. Hell, I've caused much weirder. But we'll get to that later. The important thing about that night was that I finally noticed how strong Buffy was. She fought that guy off and managed to save the day. I didn't see the actual fight, but I assume, based on what I know now, that she staked him with something. Everyone else seemed to be in denial about what had gone on. Cordelia thought it was a biker gang and Buffy knew them from LA. Larry said that he fought off most of them (he was actually crying in the corner the whole time). The only ones who kept quiet about it were Buffy, Willow, and Xander. And me. I knew something big was happening, I just had no idea what.
I knew it also involved the new librarian, but I couldn't for the life of me figure out how. The three of them spent almost all their free time hanging out in the library with him, doing, well, I didn't exactly know. It looked to be some sort of research. With Willow involved, I'm sure it was. One time my class partner and I went in to get a book, and it was like we were interrupting some heavy discussion. A minute later, when I came back out from the stacks, they were all gone. Something was definitely not right in book land. I would have investigated further right then, but it's not like I didn't have my own stuff to deal with.
So much strange stuff happened that year. Cordelia went blind, Principal Flutie got eaten, everyone's worst nightmares started, well, being real, my science teacher disappeared and I'm pretty sure he was murdered. A couple of kids entered the talent show, and subsequently died. Basically, a whole lotta death. I found out a few years later, that even Buffy had her share.
But I was still alive. And still suspicious. Nothing much happened over the summer, which might have had something to do with Buffy being out of town on vacation. Okay, it almost definitely did. I was actually looking forward to the new school year, if only to figure out what exactly was going on. And to watch Cordelia from afar. She really was amazing back then. Probably still is. I hear she moved to LA to become an actress. When she hits the big time, I'll be able to tell people that I went to high school with her, and was even her slave for a week. But we'll get to that later. It's getting kind of late. I should probably stop for now. I'll hide this under my cot and hope that Andrew doesn't go snooping. I'm not sure what he would do if he found it, but I don't really want to find out. Even though Warren is dead, I think he can still tell Andrew what to do. Luckily, he needs me until we get back to Sunnydale and do what we have to do. Until then, I think I'm safe. I know he'll turn on me the first chance he gets, but hopefully I can do some good before that. Something to fix this mess we've made. God, how do you fix this? People are dead. This can't be fixed. But maybe it could be made better. Or at least less bad. Who knows. I'm gonna sleep now. I'll continue tomorrow night. And maybe I'll write about the girls in our nightmares. And the prophecy, once I translate it. I really should have taken Spanish in high school.