Hello, viewers! I thank you for reading this, and I hope that you enjoy what is my first real fanfic I have ever written.

Disclaimer : I own no part of Hetalia in any way, shape, or form.

At the Conference Room...

It was nearly 10 minutes into the almost daily meeting for the Countries, sunlight streaming in through the giant windows, birds chirping merrily outside... and already they were about to tear each other's throats out.

"I need a Grade A hamburger, pronto!" cried America, who was suffering from a major burger withdrawal. Recently, California and New York had a huge fight on which was a better state, and he had spent nearly all week keeping them from bashing each other's brains out. Again.

"Shut up!" snapped England, tired of America's incessant groveling. "We need to discuss more important things than your endless stomach!"

"What the cheesy dibbles is more important that my stomach?" said America, slightly offended.

Meanwhile, Italy silently shoveled food into his mouth. He had snuck in ANOTHER huge tupperware of the finest spaghetti, and was thoughtfully chewing it, sauce dripping down his chin, trying to think of what else he could put on a pizza that would actually be good.

"I told you, Italy, not to eat in the Conference room! We just got the new carpet installed!" complained England. He ignored him, as usual.

Germany snapped back at everyone. "EVERYBODY, SHUT YOUR FACES! THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE A PEACEFUL MEETING! WE NEED TO GET BACK IN ORDER!" The Countries stared at each other in silence. Then they broke out into more bickering.

"Guys, guys, can't we stop and talk in peace?" quietly asked Canada, one of the only level - headed person in the room. "I mean, if we just sat down and just were civilized, that would make this the fourth meeting in a row to not have any physical injuries! A new record, eh?!" Of course, as usual, nobody paid any attention to poor Canada, who went back to silently reading his book (War and Peace by Leo Tolstoy [his favorite book that he's read at least 42 times - he deeply recommends it for you young readers]), despite all the noise in the room.

Finally, after about another 15 minutes of arguing, screaming, and airborne mangoes (therefore forfeiting the chance of a new record), the room settled down. Pausing to delicately sip from his tea cup, England cleared his throat.

"Status report: America, you go first."

America huffed in annoyance. "Everything's lovely. JUST lovely. California and New York are at it again, but I can handle them. However, someone painted the faces of Mount Rushmore with handlebar mustaches, top hats, and monocles in blue spray paint!"

England sighed in exasperation, already beginning to see where this meeting was heading. "Ok, who did it? Confess now or else I will find out and send Hungary after you." Everyone shuddered, looking at Hungary near the end of the long table. Her pearly white teeth shined as she swung her frying pan in the air.

Canada gulped a little, shrinking into his seat, and slowly raised his hand. "...I did. I defaced the grand Mount Rushmore."

"Who's that guy?" whispered Bulgaria to Romania. "I don't think I've ever seen him. Did England take over some more and made it a new country or something?" He wasn't the only Country who had no clue who Canada was. Including America.

"Hey, I don't have a clue who you are, but it doesn't matter. NO ONE defaces my property!" he exclaimed.

"He's your brother Canada," England said impatiently. "He's been a Country for nearly 145 years now."

"Oh, of course," sighed America, a bit surprised at the fact that he even had a brother. "Canada, Canada, bro. Even if I had no idea who you are, I have a feeling we could not only be siblings, but also possibly best friends. However, the first rule of friendship is that you do not deface the greatest leaders of all time! IT IS A NATIONAL SYMBOL OF MY COUNTRY!"

"Not to mention a rock," muttered France, rolling his eyes at the spectacle. America whipped around to face him, face red with his seething.

"Well, my 'rock' can kick the Eiffel Tower's butt!"

France stood up to meet America in the face. "You did NOT just say that! Take it back!"

"America, go to the Tantrum room and calm yourself down!" commanded England, completely done with his hysterical teenage girl-like attitude. America, who had finished his angry rant, slinked through the door into a small, square room filled with nothing but mirrors, meant to shame the visitor for exploding in what was supposed to be a so-called "peaceful" meeting. Nearly every Country had visited the Tantrum room at least once.

"And Canada, you are expected to clean up Mount Rushmore and write a sincere apology note to America in 2 days," informed England.

"But, why can't America do it? I mean, all he does is eat hamburgers and obsess over Superman, eh!" cried Canada, trying to sound angry. The Countries all watched in fascination of the nature of this new "stranger." England shot a look at Hungary, and she grinned a little bit wider, swinging her pan at an astounding speed. Canada sighed and nodded, sinking down into his seat even more.

"Well," England said, "anybody else want to confess to defacing another Country's rock? No one? Good. Let's get started. WITHOUT head injuries, thank you very much."

Half an hour later...

"Meh," said Lithuania, who was busy trying to catch Belarus's attention a few seats down, and failing miserably. She glared at him with a fury that made all the Countries shiver and shrink away from her pointy, sharp nails and hostile eyes.

"Hmph," he continued. "Why do we even go to these daily meetings? What's the point?"

"The point is," replied England, "to unify our brothers -"

"And sisters!" called out Lichtenstein, her purple ribbon falling in her face.

"And sisters," continued England, slightly annoyed, "so that all the Countries can live in peace and harmony." Lithuania gave him a look. "Fine, and also because our bosses are forcing us to. Happy?"

Lithuania huffed. "No. They're too boring. Greece fell asleep, China just ate a whole box of fruit snacks, and Denmark's raiding the soda stash again." China silently crumpled all 10 wrappers in his hand as they all turned to the back room entrance, where they could all see Denmark kneeling in front of the small, silver fridge, filling a giant burlap bag with Sprite, Mountain Dew, and Root Beer. He glanced up, waved at all of them cheerily, and continued shoving them in, stopping for a moment to guzzle down a soda can in approximately 27 seconds.

Shaking his head but giving no further scoldings, England said, "Lithuania, unless you want tea spewing out of your shower head, I suggest you stay."

Lithuania's eyes widened and shook his head, remembering the last time he had skipped the meeting in favor of a hockey game. The following day he had turned on his shower only to find rotten, smelly compost tea being dumped on his head. It took a week to get the stench out of his locks. The others glanced at each other, remembering the time before that Iceland hadn't been present, and later found tea absolutely soaking his mattress.

England smiled a bit evilly and looked around. "Speaking of attendance, where is Antarctica? She was here last week." The other Countries grinned at the thought of Antarctica being bombarded by gallons of tea in some way.

All of a sudden, the projector screen at the front of the room turned on, with no one having touched the remote. Everyone turned to it, only to find Antarctica smiling, stroking a penguin.

Antarctica's icy blue eyes glittered with slight amusement. She sat at her desk, sitting in a simple, rolly chair. In the background, the Countries could see her living room filled with not only white, pristine couches and a huge entertainment center, but also about 13 other penguins waddling around. Her white, translucent long hair wisped around her rounded face. Despite the obvious below 0 degree weather, she only wore some shorts and a blue tank top, showing no reaction to the chilly temperature.

England stood up to meet the screen. "Where have you been, Antarctica? I know where you live. You know the protocol - I will be visiting sometime soon. Do you prefer green or black tea?"

Antarctica laughed, her voice ringing throughout the Conference room. It was soft, even melodic, except for the underlying edge of danger. "Oh, England, you ignorant. Little. Moron."

Here, England's face reddened slightly, and opened his mouth, but Antarctica waved her perfect, delicate little hand, signaling for him to be quiet.

"I am here to announce my mutiny," she chirped brightly. The Countries all gasped in unison, except for Greece, who jolted a bit and relaxed, snoring gently."I am done with you. I mean, last week we were discussing pollution and how to stop it. In case you guys didn't know, my continent is filled with these adowable," she nuzzled her penguin, which the Countries could make out an "Oreo" engraved on a silver tag strung around his neck like a collar, "innowcent, wittle penguins!"

But," her eyes glimmered with malice, "innocent no more, for they shall be my new army! Prepare for battle, Countries!"

Cryptus raised his hand and said politely, "Um, I'm all for war and everything," - the Countries knew this was a lie - "but how did you know to come on the screen when England asked where you were?"

"Oh," she replied, joy and amusement dancing through her voice, "I rigged up a camera in the corner by the sign up poster last week! And Cuba, picking your nose can lead to serious issues!" The Countries all looked at the poster, where they could make out a tiny little object embedded at the corner, while Cuba tightened his lips, not saying anything for once.

"Anyway," continued Antarctica, "have a lovely day and continue all your silly little lives! Australia, I'll be coming for you first!" The screen went black again as Australia spluttered while his koala jumped on top of the table, a murderous look on its face. Greece still hadn't woken up during the ordeal, and his quiet snoring was the only sound in the room as all the Countries sat in complete silence. Then England spoke up.

"So... Antarctica's broken the alliance, evil penguins are after Australia, and we are in total danger. Anybody want Chinese takeout?"

Any comments, reviews, or feedback of any sort would be very much appreciated! Thank you!

-DragonFire0102