Disclaimer: I don't own Kim Possible or related characters.

The great pretender

Shego watched the two women at the restaurant table with concern. The women were well-matched; both of them young, attractive, and nicely dressed. They were evidently enjoying each other's company, judging by the animated conversation and frequent bursts of laughter. Shego knew both of them. The blonde sitting with her back towards her was an employee of Future Ways, the technology firm currently renting her services. The redhead she knew from way back, even if she hadn't seen her in person for some years.

Shego walked up to the table. Before she could speak up, the redhead looked up at her with a smile and said, "Hi, Shego."

The other woman turned to face her, taken aback. "Oh, Miss Green. Good evening." She looked a little puzzled.

"Good evening, Miss Winters, Miss Possible," Shego said.

"Is there some problem?"

"I was just wondering if you were aware of who your dinner companion is working for?"

"Kim... Miss Possible is working as a PR representative for Possible Solutions. Their booth is quite near ours."

"Miss Possible is currently under a freelance contract with the Department of Justice, which, as you no doubt recall, is conducting a completely spurious investigation into Future Ways."

"Is that true?" Miss Winters turned back to Kim with a hurt expression. The redhead gave her a guilty grin.

"I wish I could say no."

"So all this attention, it was just a ruse to get close to me so you could dig up some dirt on my employer?"

"Cindy, it's not like that. I haven't been lying to you. I like your company. I like you."

"Stop... just stop. Don't try to talk to me anymore." Miss Winters got up and hurriedly left the restaurant. She paused for a moment at the door to look back at the table. Kim looked after her wistfully.

"Thanks a lot for breaking up my date, Shego."

"If you weren't trying to cozy up to my wards, there wouldn't be a problem." Shego paused for a while. "Was that what it looked like? Were you really leading her on like that? I find it hard to believe DOJ told you to seduce potential witnesses."

"No, they didn't tell me to do that." Kim gave Shego a mischievous grin. "But they didn't tell me I couldn't do that, either. I figured if I had to cozy up to someone, it might as well be someone attractive." She sighed. "She probably won't even talk to me anymore."

"How far were you prepared to go? Would you have slept with her?" The concept made Shego a little uncomfortable.

"Hello, did you even see her? You bet your sweet ass I would have slept with her." Kim looked at Shego for a moment, the continued. "It can't be that much of a shock to you. I'm pretty sure my orientation is public knowledge."

"I don't trust everything I read in the papers."

"I appreciate that. And just for the record, that Hollywood orgy rumor is totally made up. I only slept with one person that night. But it was a woman, so that one is true."

Shego didn't know how to respond. She remembered Kim as a high school kid. It was jarring to think of her as a sexually active young woman—and a queer woman, at that.

"Come on, sit down," Kim said, indicating the seat vacated by Miss Winters.

"Uh, I don't know if that's a good idea."

"Hey, you're the one who chased my date away. The least you can do is keep me company. Besides, we already ordered; it'd be a shame to let the meal go to waste."

Shego was torn. She was a little uneasy with the situation, and they were, once again, on different sides. On the other hand, Kim had been a constant presence in her life for a long time, and she wouldn't mind finding out what she'd done with herself for the past few years. It was her curiosity that won out in the end, possibly aided by the puppy-dog eyes Kim was giving her. Besides, she was the head of security for Future Ways at this trade show. If they didn't trust her to not give out anything to the investigators, they shouldn't have hired her in the first place.

"Okay, fine. But you pay for the dinner."

Kim bit her lip. "Mm. Will I get anything out of it?"

"Sorry, Cupcake, but I don't swing that way."

"Then maybe you should reconsider using those old pet names. They come across a little different in this situation."

Shego grunted in response. She'd already come to that conclusion, only a second too late.

"So, 'Miss Green', huh?"

"Eh, it's my stage name. Works as well as any."

"How is the life on the straight," Kim said, pausing to take a dramatic sigh, "and narrow treating you?"

"I keep busy. There's good money in private security, and I do have unique insight."

"Mm. And you're quite willing to work for dirty companies, too."

"Don't go making any baseless accusations. You don't have a shred of evidence of any wrongdoing by Future Ways."

"Not yet, but by the end of this expo, I will."

"You're delusional. And how do your brothers feel about you using their company as a cover, anyway?"

"Hey, I do legitimate consultant work for them. It's not like they're unhappy to have someone with my contacts doing promotional work. Although to be honest, I think my parents asked them to give me the contract. They're worried I'll starve due to my dissolute lifestyle." Kim huffed. "Like I couldn't take care of myself. It's just that nine to five doesn't really suit me. This freelance problem solver thing is so much better."

"You do seem to know your way around the exhibition floor. You've done these things before?"

"Ooh, somebody's been keeping an eye on me. Are you sure you're not interested?"

"It's my job to keep an eye on you DOJ stooges."

"Ouch, that hurts. Yeah, I do these things every once in a while. They can be quite fun. Manning the booth gets a little boring, but there's some cool presentations sometimes, and you often meet interesting people." Kim sighed. "I really liked Cindy, and not just for her looks. She's really sharp. We had some good discussions about some recent developments in nanofabrication techniques."

Shego gave Kim a sharp look.

"Oh, don't look so concerned. No company secrets were discussed. But if you can't talk general theory with people outside your lab every once in a while, you'll never get anywhere."

"You really understand that stuff? I thought you just did PR."

"Hey, I is a smart girl. I went to a university and everything. You think I wanted to be the only one in the family without a doctorate to my name?"

"Wait, you're a Dr. Possible now?"

"Yup." Kim sipped her drink nonchalantly. "It's a family tradition. No big."

"Huh. I guess you've been busy the past few years."

"Yeah, kinda. It wasn't too bad. Ron was busy doing his own thing, and I didn't feel comfortable doing dangerous missions solo, so I had time to study." Kim looked at her. "Not that there would have been a lot of missions, it's been pretty quiet since the Lorwardians."

"Yeah, the invasion took the fun out of world domination plans for quite a few of the big players, and the ones that tried got taken down hard. I'm not sure there's anyone of the old guard left, except maybe Gemini and his W.E.E.. I just took my presidential pardon and walked away."

"I hope you kept your costume. I always rather liked it." Kim's expression didn't leave any questions on what she meant. Shego couldn't answer her on account of a sudden coughing fit.

"So how's life been since you got out of the villain game?"

"Private security isn't so bad, as long as I steer clear of the people looking for a 'full-service bodyguard'. Some of my European pardons are conditional, and aggravated assault would probably void them, even if I was the aggravated party. It's not worth losing my favorite vacation spots."

"Oh, god, I get those offers, too. Back when I was a squeaky clean teen no-one would have dared, but for some reason people seem to think that me being openly bi means I'm ready for anything." Kim took a sip of her aperitif. "I mean, I am open to a lot of things with the right person, but there's a time and a place, people."

"And that would be college, huh?"

Kim smiled. "I didn't have any time for cheerleading, which was a drag, but I did have some time for cheerleaders. And a footballer. And cute serious college boys and girls. So I guess it kinda was."

"Wow, Kim," Shego said, taken aback. "It's a wonder you got any studying done."

Shego paused for a moment as a waiter brought out the dishes. To his credit, he didn't even bat an eye at Kim having changed her dinner partner on the fly. The pause was well-timed: Shego didn't think it would have been polite to call Kim a slut to her face. She took a bite out of the salmon laid before her. It was very good.

"So was it in college you discovered you liked girls, too?" That was the usual story, right?

"No, I figured it out in high school. I tried to ignore it at first, since I was rather invested in being a basic, average girl. It was usually pretty easy if I had some hot guy to drool after, but some girls were just too damn sexy to ignore."

"Who was the first girl you noticed? Someone on the cheerleading squad?" Shego was interested despite herself. She'd never thought that Kim was anything but resolutely straight, back then.

Rather than answer her, Kim just looked at her with a faint smile, her head resting on her hand and mischief playing in her big green eyes. It took Shego a while to get what she was trying to communicate. Her eyes widened at the realization.

"What? You've got to be kidding!"

"Why is it so hard to believe? You were a mysterious and alluring older woman; fit, skilled, exotically beautiful, and more than a little dangerous. I used to fantasize about you."

"Used to, right?" This was not a revelation Shego was comfortable hearing.

"Well, the constant put-downs and you trying to take my head off were kind of a turn-off. I grew to resent you after a while."

"Um," Shego said. Somehow that didn't make her feel any better.

"But, towards the end, when our encounters were becoming more like clocking in at the office than murderous brawls, I began to warm up to you again. Especially after you saved my life, twice."

"I just wanted to be the one to finally bring you down. I'd have felt cheated if it was somebody else."

"Yeah, that would be much more convincing if you'd ever actually tried to make good on the threat. If it was a threat. I can still remember your words exactly: 'next time, you're mine.' I can tell you that raised my heart rate. I might have let you have me, too."

Shego didn't know what to say to that, so she had another bite of the fish.

"You know, this is pretty good salmon," Shego said, hoping to change the topic, and took a sip of wine to wash the fish down.

"I like seafood, too," Kim said with a salacious grin. Shego choked on her drink.

"You have a dirty mind, Shego," Kim said, much too amused.

"You're the one who just implied lesbian sex!"

"You're the one who jumped to that conclusion. Is there something you want to tell me?"

There were, in fact, several things Shego wanted to tell Kim right then, but since she had a reputation to uphold these days she decided not to. Her current client probably wouldn't want her to instigate a brawl in a restaurant, and the contract at least paid pretty good, even if it had some less attractive features.

Shego realized she was letting Kim get to her. In a way the situation was a reversal of their meetings in the years past. Shego had got a lot of mileage out of teasing and taunting the less experienced and charmingly earnest young hero, even if the nature of the teasing was very different. She supposed this was Kim getting some payback. She probably didn't mean half the things she said; she'd just noticed that the subject matter made Shego uncomfortable and pounced on the perceived weakness. She just needed to stop raising to the bait.

"Nope. I'm just here to get a free meal out of you." Shego emphasized her point by devouring more of her salmon. "But maybe you can claim it as an expense?"

"Totally. I'm distracting Future Ways' head of security, leaving the field wide open for the other investigators."

"Nice try, Kimmie, but I have enough manpower to cover your bumbling colleagues. I think it's safe to assume you're the most competent of the bunch."

"Flattery will definitely get you somewhere." Kim again had that sparkle in her eye. Shego decided to ignore it.

"Meanwhile, you, their star freelancer, are stuck here with me. I think my clients will take that exchange."

"You're kind of implying that you're less valuable than me. I didn't think you did modesty."

"I'm less critical to my side than you are to yours. We here in the private sector can actually afford to pay real salaries and therefore employ competent people."

"Well, the government investigators are more dedicated than your mercenaries since they work for reasons other than a mere paycheck."

"Aren't you a kind of mercenary here, Miss Freelancer?"

"I don't work for the highest bidder, I choose my clients based on the worthiness of the cause."

"And who judges the worthiness, you?"

"Well, obviously, since I do the choosing." Kim gave her a pitying glance. Shego supposed that was fair enough.

"Do you actually make money with this gig?"

"It's a living. I admit it wasn't an easy thing for me to start charging for my help, but a girl's got to eat, you know? I still do humanitarian relief work and stuff like that pro bono, and if I really think someone deserves my help I'll charge a dollar, but a surprisingly large number of people are willing and able to pay for my work."

"Yeah, you know, that is how the rest of the humanity operates. With your skills you could command the kind of money I did in my mercenary days."

"I don't do your sort of work. I'm not in it for the money, Shego. As long as I have enough to live on, I just want to help as many people as I can."

"I thought you might have outgrown your idealism a little."

"I just want to make the world a better place. Is that such a terrible thing?"

"No. But you know what, I don't really believe you. You're obviously pretty smart, Doctor Possible. You could have dedicated your life to curing cancer or something, but here you are, playing cops and robbers and pretending to try to chat me up. You're in this for your own amusement."

"There are lots of ways to help. I can pick something that's fun for me."

"And this is fun for you?"

"Well, it could be more fun." Kim waggled her eyebrows at her, as if worried she had been too subtle. Shego rolled her eyes.

"I have trouble believing you're actually this oversexed."

"I'm not oversexed. I have a healthy sexual appetite entirely appropriate for a young woman." Kim took a bite of her food in a manner that made Shego wonder just what level Kim considered healthy.

"I think you're just undersexed," Kim said. "But I can help you with that."

"Yeah, not going to happen."

Kim wasn't entirely wrong, though. Shego couldn't recall the last time she'd gotten laid. One night stands had lost their allure some time ago, and her current career didn't really leave her with a lot of opportunities to pursue anything more substantive. It didn't matter; Shego had long since concluded that romance just wasn't for her.

"I think you're sabotaging yourself here, working against your own interest."

"I'm not interested in women."

"You wouldn't be the first person to be wrong about that."

Shego decided she didn't need to sit here listening to this. "Thank you for the dinner, Kimmie, but I think I must bid you good night. I need my beauty sleep."

"Understandable, at your age."

"Excuse me?"

"Well, you are a lady of a certain age."

"I'm in my twenties!"

"Technically."

"What happened to the flattery?"

"It was getting me nowhere fast."

"Are you... are you negging me?"

"No! That would be low. I think you're pretty hot, for an older woman."

Yeah, Kim was definitely out to rattle her, and she'd let her get to her again. Just when she'd thought she had Kim's game figured out, she caught her off guard again by switching gears. Perhaps she could turn things around on Kim?

"I think I liked it better when you were buttering me up."

"Nah, I wouldn't do that. Butter isn't fun to lick. Whipped cream, now, or chocolate... speaking of which, don't you want dessert? I know I do."

Okay, she should have seen that coming. Shego had a headache, and she didn't think it was from the one glass of wine.

"Is there anything on the list you won't make a dirty comment about?"

"You mean: is there anything you won't make a dirty association about? Your mind is constantly on sex, Shego. I think you need to get laid." Kim once again flashed her that mischievous grin. "Lucky for you, I love helping people in need."

"I'll just have something without a lot of calories. I need to watch my figure."

"I can do that for you."

"You're getting kinda predictable, Kimmie."

"Yeah. Well, I'm going to get something that's bad for me, but sinfully sweet... are you sure you're off the menu?"

"Yes, Kimmie."

"Alas. Chocolate it is."

Shego ate her fruit salad while watching Kim enviously. She was pretty sure Kim exaggerated her reactions to the hot fudge sundae for her benefit, but she still wanted some. Fruit salad. When did she become the kind of person who ordered fruit salad for dessert?

"Can I have your cherry?" Kim said, presumably to meet a quota.

"I'm afraid you're a decade late, Kimmie."

"Yeah, but you've never been with a girl before. I could take your lesbian virginity."

Somewhere earlier in the conversation Shego might have been shocked, but by now she took it in stride.

"What happened to innuendo, Kimmie? That was a little more explicit than your material so far."

"Was I out of line?"

"You've been out of line for the last twenty minutes."

"And yet you're still here."

She was. Why was she still here? It wasn't because she wanted to be hit on by Kim. It wasn't the free meal, either. She had wanted to talk with Kim, to find out what she'd been doing. Or was it just to spend some time with her? It was funny, the way nostalgia worked. She and Kim had never been friends; in fact, they had been enemies. However, Kim was still a familiar face from the past, and Shego had experienced a little thrill at seeing her again. Their conflicts in the past seemed less important than the fact they had a shared history.

"I assure you it's not because of your come-ons, but despite them."

"Whatever you need to tell yourself, Shego."

"Are you going to get the check?"

"You're really going to make me pay?"

"I said I would, and I'm a woman of my word."

"Yeah, right. Fine, I'll pick up the tab since you were my date." Kim flagged down their waiter. "You know, if I'm paying, you don't really need to stick around."

That was true. Shego had merely sat down for a moment to catch up. She was under no obligation to stay, even though it seemed a little rude to just walk away. Of course, somebody needed to keep an eye on Kim.

"Are you trying to get rid of me, Kimmie? Maybe so you could slip away to do some snooping? It's not going to happen."

"Curses, you saw right through me. Well, I guess you have no choice but to stick close to me." Shego wondered if she'd just talked herself into doing what Kim wanted her to do.

After taking care of their bill, Kim got up from her seat. It gave Shego a better look at her chosen attire, which was a rather slinky little black dress. It made Shego feel under-dressed in her professionally conservative dark jacket and skirt. Kim was wearing fairly tall red heels, definitely not something she wore in the exhibition hall. It wasn't for those kinds of exhibitions.

"Do you always bring these kinds of clothes to these events?"

"Well, you never know when you might get lucky."

"Do you make a habit of conference affairs?"

"You know how it is for us busy young professionals. You grab your romance where you can find it."

Shego didn't feel like she could blame Kim. Her current lifestyle didn't really leave room for love, but sometimes, in her weaker moments, she wished romance would find her, nonetheless.

Shego followed Kim outside. Kim shivered a little when a breeze caught them, and for a fleeting moment Shego felt an absurd impulse to offer Kim her jacket. She shook it off. It wasn't like she was actually her date.

"Not really dressed for the hour, are you, Pumpkin?"

"You could always keep me warm if you wanted to, Shego."

"I'm afraid you'll just have to live with your choices."

It wasn't a long walk to the hotel. Shego opened the door for Kim, since she was busy hugging herself for warmth. Kim collected her key from the reception desk. Shego had never surrendered hers.

"Walk me to my room?"

"Well, I want to make sure that's where you're actually headed."

"Yeah, that sounds plausible enough." Kim called an elevator. "Do you honestly believe I'll sneak out to snoop in this getup?"

"I wouldn't put it past you. I wouldn't put it past you to have some high-tech stealth-suit in your purse, either."

"Oh, so you are worried about physical security more than social engineering? Somebody brought something incriminating along, huh?"

"I'm worried your people will use a disconcertingly broad surveillance mandate to attempt to illegitimately access proprietary information."

"Ooh, you certainly sound like a professional."

"That's why I get paid the big bucks," Shego said as she followed Kim into the elevator.

"Do you want to pat me down to make sure I don't have any sneaky gadgets on me?"

Shego eyed Kim up and down. "I really doubt you could hide anything under that dress."

"You'd be surprised."

For the entire trip up, Kim stood just a little closer to Shego than was entirely appropriate. Shego decided to not raise to the bait and stood her ground. Despite her constant corny come-ons, so far Kim had not attempted to touch her without leave, and Shego didn't think she would start now. Shego kept her eyes fixed on the doors after getting an inadvertent glimpse down Kim's cleavage, generously displayed by the sweetheart neckline. She was pretty sure Kim hadn't noticed, since she wasn't teasing her about stealing a look.

"You're very tense. Would you like a massage?"

"Not from you. I don't trust you."

"You wound me, Shego."

The elevator stopped, and Shego followed Kim into the corridor. Kim's door wasn't far away.

"Well, this is me," Kim said, although she must have known Shego knew it very well. "Would you like to come inside for a nightcap?"

"No thanks, Kimmie."

"Your loss."

"Good night, Kimmie. Have a cold shower and go to sleep."

"You know those don't really help, right?" Kim slipped inside her room. "Sweet dreams, Shego. I'll see you tomorrow."

Of that, there was very little doubt. Kim was the biggest threat among the investigators at the expo, and somebody needed to keep an eye on her. Knowing how slippery the girl could be, Shego was loath to delegate that duty to her minions. She couldn't watch her all the hours of the day, though. Shego called her second in command and requested somebody to watch Kim's door for the night. Kim could still slip away via the balcony, but there was little she could realistically do about that. All she could do was try to limit Kim's options and keep a close eye on the critical assets.

On her way to her room Shego was troubled by the look in Kim's eyes as she closed the door. She'd given her mischievous and even leering looks throughout the dinner, but that final bright-eyed look had been different. There had been warmth in it that made Shego uneasy. She had thought Kim had merely been teasing her, but now she wondered if Kim might actually be interested.

When Shego made it to her room, she found Miss Winters waiting for her.

"Miss Green," she said. "I just want you to know I had no idea Kim... Miss Possible was a government investigator, and I want to assure you that I didn't tell her anything that would be against the interests of Future Ways."

Shego looked at the woman. She was very attractive, and if Kim hadn't indicated otherwise, Shego would have assumed she was hired for that reason alone. Her looks were probably still the reason she was at the expo rather than back at the labs. Shego suspected her shoulder-length hair was only dyed blonde.

She wore the same clothes as she had at the date, and Shego wondered how long she'd been waiting. She hadn't dressed up quite to to the extent Kim had; the white silk blouse and the modest heels were probably what she wore to work. The tight skirt looked a little too short for a professional environment, but it wasn't impossible she'd been asked to wear it at the booth.

"I believe you, Miss Winters. It's unlikely you have the sort of information she's looking for. She likely hoped you'd introduce her to somebody on the business side."

"Please, call me Cindy." Still she lingered, nervous.

"You're not in any trouble. Just be careful for the rest of our stay here."

"I will." She stood silent for a while, her eyes cast down. Then she suddenly faced Shego. "I can't believe she'd do something like that to me. She seemed so nice."

"Miss Winters, uh, Cindy... I'm not sure Kimmie's interest in you was entirely professional. She, ah, seemed a little taken by you." Shego wasn't sure why she was defending Kim.

"Kimmie, huh?"

"Miss Possible. We have a history." Shego noted that Miss Winters's eyes widened at that, and she realized how the phrase might be interpreted under the circumstances. "Not that kind of history. I used to be on the wrong side of the law and faced her a lot, back in the day."

"Oh. I heard something about your past, but I don't really follow that sort of news."

"Sic transit gloria mundi. I used to be the most wanted woman in the world."

"Well," Miss Winters said, looking her up and down and smiling, "I can believe that."

Was she hitting on her? First Kim and now Miss Winters.

"Anyway, did you have any other concerns, Miss Winters?"

"Ah, no. Is there going to be something on my record?"

"No, I don't see any reason there should be. Good night."

Shego opened her door and entered while Miss Winters said her goodbyes. She closed the door and rested her head against it for a while. She suspected this was going to be a long week.