A/N: Here's a taste of the darker version I had in mind before my romantic side overcame me. A few of you wanted this … so, here you go.

When Doves Cry Out

"So …" Kensi slipped into the armory, watching her partner/boyfriend as he scrubbed a bristle brush along the slide of his disassembled pistol. " … this is where you vanished to?"

Deeks wasn't sure if she meant it as a question or a statement, and in his current mood, he really didn't want to care. He'd needed to clean his weapon after the shootout at the hotel and since he'd been busy writing his report for the LAPD while the rest of the team had taken care of theirs, he was left to do it all by himself. It stung that it had taken the better part of an hour for Kensi to either find him or bother to look in the first place.

"Yeah, you know how Hetty is about the readiness of our weapons." His emotionless response sounded hollow even in his own ears, so he tried to lighten it a little. "I don't think she's forgiven me for the last time I forgot."

Kensi didn't respond as she moved to stand at his side, leaning her hip against the table in the center of the room. She picked up the lower receiver, consisting of the pistol grip and the magazine well, and began to run an oily rag across the metal surface. As she moved, Deeks caught the scent of the lavender and cinnamon body wash that she loved so much, and he did too … but there was another smell that made his stomach clench into a tight knot.

Cologne.

Sharp and pungent. Musky and heady at the same time.

And definitely not his.

DiNozzo.

Son. Of. A. Bitch.

It must have transferred when she gave him that overly friendly hug in the bullpen before he left to fly back to DC. It had almost surprised the detective that his partner/girlfriend hadn't volunteered to escort the very well-dressed agent to the airport. Hell, from the way she'd been flirting with the man, he wouldn't have been shocked if she'd offered to drive him all the way to the East coast.

Don't get mad … let it go.

He wanted to, he really did … but it was eating away at him and he knew that sooner or later, they were going to have to hash it out. When Kensi cleared her throat, it seemed that fate had stepped in once again.

"Does this mean that you're done being 'weird'?" She even made air quotes.

Deeks' hands dropped to the table top, the slide making a soft 'thump' sound when it hit the pad. "Define weird."

Kensi glanced at him over her shoulder. "Well, for starters … how about that ridiculous Uma suit you had on first thing this morning. Good grief Deeks, if you're going to shock me like that, how about next time you give me a head's up?"

When she saw his face fall, she knew that was the wrong thing to say. Her partner's countenance went from slightly miffed to … hurt? Then he turned his head away from her and found something interesting on the wall in the far corner to hold his attention. Kensi waited a moment before leaning to the side so she could poke his bicep with her finger.

"Deeks?"

His lack of response caused her 'something's wrong' meter to spike.

"Hey, partner … what's up?"

After taking a deep breath, he turned back to face her, his familiar smile plastered on his face in such a way that she knew it was forced. "Nothing … nothing … just got a lot on my mind."

Kensi wasn't buying it but the small twinkle in his eyes made her think that maybe she was reading more into his mood that she should. She took a deep breath and let it all slowly, waiting to see if his body language would give anything away. When nothing shifted, she simply nodded, pushing herself off the edge of the table. "Do you want me to go ahead and order the Chinese for tonight?"

When he didn't respond as quickly as he usually would, she stopped moving.

"Uh … yeah … about that." He now looked nervous, like he knew that she wasn't going to like what he said. "I've got some things to tie up over at the precinct … so we might want to make tonight our night off."

Still thinking that she was reading his mood all wrong, Kensi tried to keep the conversation lite. "But we were going to stay up and watch the 'Halloween' Movie Marathon … it starts at eight."

Deeks let his eyes fall to the disassembled gun on the table. "I'm just not feeling up to it tonight … I'll DVR it for us and maybe we can catch it later."

"Are you serious?"

He only nodded and her heart suddenly felt like it wanted to stop beating. He was always the one that fought against her when she mentioned taking a night off and this sudden one-eighty was making her dizzy.

"Yeah … I think so."

This was her moment to agree and bid him a soft good-bye, slip him a reassuring kiss and head out to find something to occupy her for the evening. But the bad vibe that he'd been putting off even before agent DiNozzo had arrived wasn't lessening and she knew that if she left it alone it might fester into something bigger than it should be.

"Okay … but on one condition."

He looked up at her with a raised eyebrow and before he could agree or disagree, Kensi pressed on, dropping her hand to rest gently on his shoulder. It startled her when he spun away, allowing her hand to slip from where it was touching him to fall awkwardly to her side.

Deeks walked over to the large window that faced the shooting range then turned back to face her, resting his back against the ballistic glass. "Okay."

Kensi didn't hesitate or mince her words that came out in a harsh whisper. "You have to tell me what the hell is wrong!" When his eyes fell to look at the floor at his feet, it took all of her will power not to run over and tug him into her arms.

"You're gonna think it's stupid …"

"Deeks …"

He knew that he had to explain why his mood had turned even more sour as the day progressed, he'd just hoped that she would leave it alone until tomorrow and he had calmed down a little bit more. "Alright … I wore that stupid, canary-yellow monstrosity for you."

His statement caught her so off-guard that she couldn't help the small snigger that escaped before she could stop herself. The look that formed on his face told her that her list of mistakes on this day had just grown longer.

"See … told you that you would think it's stupid." He pushed off the window and turned toward the exit.

"No … Deeks … I'm sorry …" She reached out to stop him but he did it himself. Kensi wasn't sure if he only did it so he could finally explain of if it was to avoid having her touch him again.

When he started talking, he was looking at the weapons case at the far end of the room. "When I was helping you unpack those boxes you brought to our place … I found a bunch of old posters …"

Kensi's mind tried desperately to remember what had been in those boxes but she'd packed them so quickly she wasn't able to recall anything specific.

"There were some Led Zeppelin, The Who, even a Stevie Wonder … but then I found an entire cache of Bruce Lees …"

The Bruce references … the yellow jump suit … ah, shit!

He was talking again before she could find the words.

" … there was the one with him in that suit … and I had this stupid idea that if I wore one like your hero, that maybe you would appreciate the gesture." His voice was sad but no more so than what Kensi was feeling about how her boyfriend had tried to do something sweet and thoughtful … and she'd crapped all over it.

"I knew that Sam and Callen would make fun of me … took me forever to work up the guts to actually walk out into the gym in that thing." Deeks ran his hand through his hair, his tell that he was both nervous and even a little fearful.

"De … Marty …"

"I know it looked ridiculous … but … I just wanted to … you know … "

Kensi took a step toward him but when his body stiffened; she paused for a moment as she decided if he still needed to finish his thoughts.

"Then very Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo waltzes right off a GQ photo shoot and I'm standing there looking like a complete buffoon …" His voice was dropping to another octave, the one that let her know that he was hurt … and angry. " … and it's not ten minutes later before my girlfriend starts gushing all over him about how much she likes a man who dresses his age … and how good he looks in his suit." He'd almost spit the words out.

"Babe … I'm sorry … "

He continues as if he didn't hear her or doesn't care. "That suit costs more than I make in a month! How in the hell am I supposed to compete with that?!"

This time she does move to be closer and when he steps further away, she can't hide the hurt that courses through her. "No … no … Marty, you don't have to …"

"To what? Worry that someone that dresses … looks … speaks … better than I do will turn your head?"

"That's not what happened!" Kensi tries not to, but her defenses are beginning to kick in and she forgets that she was trying to keep this light so that they would end up together tonight. The longer this escalates, the slimmer those chances are growing.

"Isn't it!? Mr. Super Duper Agent man walks in here and my partner … my lover … immediately starts off making fun of the way I dress … the way I talk …" Deeks' shoulders are now up around his ears and he's fighting a losing battle with holding anything back. " … then when I think it can't get any worse, she consistently choses to team up with him throughout the day … I'll go with DiNozzo …DiNozzo and I will take it … DiNozzo and I will head into the hotel … DiNozzo, you ever think about coming out to the west coast? … and that sexy voice you used when you took the call on his phone? You almost slapped me the last time I touched yours!"

In that moment, Kensi realized that the comms had been open and that her boyfriend and partner had heard everything in her conversation with the agent from DC. "Babe … please …"

But he wasn't listening. "You forget that I know you better than you think you know yourself … I watched you last week, when you were smoozing the billionaire money launderer for domestic terrorists … there was a part of you that enjoyed that life … that wanted it."

In a moment of personal honesty, Kensi realized that he was right; the cars, the jewelry, the expensive dinners … it had all been nice and flattering. She let out a long sigh and took a small step closer. "Deeks … yeah babe, it was nice … but I choose you … I want to be with you."

"Until anther sharp looking man walks by and spins your head." He said it like the words tasted like bile in his throat and when he finally turned to look at her, she saw only hurt and pain swimming in the depths of his Pacific blues. "Hell, when you came out of the hotel after the shoot-out, you checked on him before even asking if I was okay!"

"That's not what happened … "

He stepped toward her and for a moment, she almost fell away from his harsh gaze. "It's not? Then this must be some sort of revenge for the way Talia acted when she was here. Is that what that hug you gave him was all about?!"

Just the mention of the woman who Kensi thought understood the new level of her 'thing' with Deeks was enough to send her blood pressure spiking. "Look, this has nothing to do with her …"

"Then what is it Kensi?"

It was the first time he'd called her by her name and it shamed her that it actually hurt when he did.

"Is this about the model? I thought we'd hashed that out and it was behind us." His anger was turning into a high boil, threatening to spill over. "I tell you what I told you then … the pictures were the same ones sent by Eric to ALL OF US! When I said she was hot, I didn't mean I wanted to sleep with her or even really have anything to do with her … she's very high maintenance …"

For a second, Kensi thought he was trying to interject some humor into their discussion, but the dark expression on his face let her know that she was wrong.

" … and you said, after we hashed it out again, that you forgave me and that it wouldn't come up again … guess I was wrong to trust you."

Now that set her off as well.

"And what about your girlfriend, Talia?"

Deeks shock his head in disbelief. "Really? This again?" He moved so fast she didn't realize it until he was already in her personal space. "She comes in here and throws herself at me … and that's my fault!?"

"Well … "

"I don't believe this! What was I supposed to do Kensi? Shoot her?" The look in that he saw in her eyes revealed that he wasn't too far off the mark. It appeared like he was about to say something else when he suddenly stopped, as if a thought had suddenly become clear to him. "That's it, isn't it?"

Kensi folded her arms across her chest, preparing to defend herself and her actions. "What are you talking about?"

"Your little dance with DiNozzo was your way of getting me back, wasn't it?"

Her response came with her patented eye-roll. "You're delusional."

"Then why were you so determined to be alone with the guy?"

Kensi stepped up to the challenge. "He's from out-of-town and he needed our help."

"Exactly … he needed our help, not just yours. I thought, out of everyone, you would have wanted he and I to hit it off … brother cops and all."

"But he's an agent, you're still a just a cop." It came out quickly and in that moment, Kensi knew she'd gone too far. She watched his entire body slump and the fire in his eyes dimmed into a cloudy shade. Stuttering over her words, she tried in vain to reel in the hurtful comment, but it was too late. "Deeks …"

The detective was already stepping backwards, away from her, avoiding the hand that had come up to catch his arm. "And there it is … just another reason why I'll never be enough for you." His retreat was quick; turning back to the bench to claim his weapon and he reassembled it so fast, she couldn't help but be impressed. But he was still moving away from her faster than she could process what was happening.

"Marty … come on, I didn't mean it …"

Deeks paused at the edge of the table and took a deep breath. "You say that every time, Kensi … every time we have these disagreements, you say 'I didn't mean it' … well, I think you do. Somewhere deep inside of you, you think you're settling with me when you could have so much more." He wiped away a tear that had slipped down his cheek. "Instead of focusing on what we already have, you're on the look-out for a better version of me … and I'll always feel like I'm not enough."

The room fell into silence as her old arguments echoed in her mind and they sounded as hallow to her as they always had to him. Deeks slipped his pistol into his belt at his back and was almost to the door when Kensi found her voice once more. "What are you doing?"

He slowed to a stop just inside the room, his head tipped back so he could look up at the ceiling. "I'm heading out."

"Meet you at home?"

She feared that his response would leave her heart quaking. She was right.

"No, Kens … not this time." Then he was gone.

…