Author's Note: Once again, this fanfiction has graphic depictions of violence and morbid humor. Read with caution.
Most people like to go away on vacation. Some go on road trips, some travel to far away countries and then there are others who enjoy cruise ships, which is exactly what our favorite Asguardian brothers were doing...that is until-
"Loki! What on Midguard was all that?!"
The cruise ship in the background was alit with flames and tilted crooked as it slowly sank in the blue water below it. Screams of terror and cries for help echoed through the air and off to the side in a little yellow raft boat was the two Odinson princes and the eight legged horse Sleipneir.
"I'm not sure what you're referring too." Loki answered, looking at his older brother confused.
"You sunk an entire cruise ship Loki!" Thor exclaimed terrified. Oh when would he learn it was never a good idea to leave his brother alone?
The green clad god tilted his head to the side; a sly, innocent smile pulling at his lips. "Are you sure that was me? I do believe I would remember something like that."
"Loki I watched you fire a harpoon into the captain's face!" Thor exclaimed.
"That sounds dangerous." Loki mused rubbing his chin thoughtfully.
"And then you started headbutting children off the side of the ship!"
"That uh, that must have been horrifying to watch."
"And then you started-oh how do the Midguardians say it?- making out with the ice sculpture!"
"Well thank Odin the children were not on board to see it." Loki responded simply.
Thor felt his blue eyes roll in their sockets and he rubbed his face when a flash or red caught his attention. He looked down and for the first time realized that the life boat they were in was splattered with red. "Uh, Loki? Why is the life boat all red and sticky?"
"Well," Loki said glancing down as well. "I guess you could say it IS red and sticky."
"Loooookiiiii, what are we standing in?" the blond Asguardian asked warily?
Loki hesitated before responding. "Would you believe it's strawberry milkshake?"
"No, I would not believe that." the elder brother responded firmly.
"Melted gumdrops?"
"No."
"Boat nectar?"
"No!"
"Some of Odin's tears?"
"Tell me the truth Loki!"
Loki sighed. "Fine...It's the lovely elderly man from 2B."
Thor's eyes widened in horror. No...Anyone but him.
"LOOOOOOKIIII YOU KILLED STANLEY!?"
"Well he was taking all the crosseaunt rolls!" Loki defended.
"I can't believe what I'm hearing." Thor mumbled, suddenly feeling sick to his stomach and trying not to look at the red in the boat.
Loki crossed his arms and stuck his nose in the air. "I will not apologize for art."
Thor opened his mouth to respond with "This is not art, this is homicide!" but his attention was drawn elsewhere when he noticed something unusual. "Where are the other life boats?"
Loki blinked and looked around. "Whoa, you won the prize. I did not even notice that."
"Where are the other lifeboats, Loki?!" Thor demanded.
The god of chaos did not respond right away. Instead he looked up at the sky for a long time. Thor opened his mouth to repeat the question for a third time when he got his answer. "Looking at the trajectory of the moon and the sun, probably at the bottom of the ocean."
"Neiiiigh!"
"Sleipneir bit lots of holes in them." Loki explained, almost proudly and petted his dark horse."
"...LOOOOOOKIIII!"
"I have a problem. I have a serious problem." Loki admitted. Sleipnier nodded in agreement.
"You just...You are terrible today!" Thor blurted out. Honestly Loki has had his bad days but this was definitely in the top ten.
"Shhhhhhh~" the green eyed god shushed, placing a finger upon his brother's lips to silence him. "Do you hear that? That's the sound of forgiveness."
Thor glared and swiped the hand away. "That's the sound of people drowning, Loki."
"That is what forgiveness sounds like." Loki nodded. "Screaming and then silence."
For the umpteenth time that day, Thor rolled his eyes. He looked around the blood splattered boat and grabbed an oar, tossing it to his murderous little brother. "Just shut up and row!"