A/N: We are back guys! I finally got my computer fixed, and wrote an amazingly cracky chapter. I give myself headaches with how crazy I am! Reviews are appreciated guys as they allow me to know if I have made any mistakes or even if you just have a good idea. Remember, anything can happen in crack! Hope you enjoy!
Swoosh, swoosh, swoosh…
Bad things always happened when Harry decides he wants to throw something. For instance, the elementally infused sword that he threw approximately eight hours ago. Yeah, it was still flying. Probably due to the magic within the sword.
That really didn't matter much though, what did matter was that Viserys Targaryen forgot his sword in his room. It was a magnificent longsword, and Viserys would never leave his precious sword alone. He didn't even care that they said he had to compensate for something, which may or may not have been true.
Viserys reached for his sword, planning to go yell at his worthless sister. And then he fell over, dead. See, elementally infused swords don't care if you're in their way, cause they won't stop.
Harry screamed in frustration. He was reading fanfiction on his computer when he went to his new favorite story Chronicle of Redemption. Sure, he may be an absurdly powerful being, but he had to have some relaxing time too. Anyways, the author said his computer was broken, and Harry wasn't happy.
Even worse, Harry was flying when he screamed, and apparently pigeons don't like it when you scream. Now Harry was mad, and covered in poop. Why did these things always happen to him?
At least he could finally see that Winterfell place. When he asked for instructions, he expected a nice and handy address for Google Earth. Apparently he wasn't even on Earth anyone, though the humans here still called it that. Why? He had no earthly idea.
Harry abruptly stopped in the middle of the air. He smirked evilly as he pulled out his awesome smart phone.
Ring
Ring
Ring
Fate was having a wonderful day. Every since she dumped that stupid kid out of her home universe, she didn't have to worry about any spontaneous explosions. And by spontaneous, she meant he blew up important celestial bodies every time she looked away.
Even better, she had time for a bath. She had canceled all appointments for the day, and told noone to call her unless it was an absolute emergency. So, as she slid into the bath, she set her phone on the counter and got ready to enjoy herself.
And then it rang, that blasted phone rang. She didn't expect a call, and so that meant something bad happened.
"What happened?" she asked almost immediately after she rushed out of the tub to the phone. This could be something horrible.
"I'm adding another toothbrush," Harry revealed in a deathly calm voice. Fate was right, it was something horrible.
Harry smiled after getting some good 'ole comic relief. He wasn't lying when he said he was adding another toothbrush, but he still found the tears of terror amusing. Now that that was out of the way, he continued his flight to Winterfell.
Harry really needed to remember to regulate his speed. "AHHH! NOT ANOTHER STRUCTURE! WHY DOES THIS ALWAYS HAPPEN TO ME?!" Harry screamed out. Harry fell to the ground, body completely crushed by the collision.
Eddard was training Robb and Jon when the mutilated corpse fell into the training yard. "Er… Dad? What's happening?" Robb asked as all three of them stared in shock. Then it moved, the corpse moved.
Horrible cracking sounds were heard as Harry's body reassembled itself. Bones shifted back to place, muscles and skin healed at a godly pace, and Jon lost his lunch as the crushed skull seemed to pop back out.
As Harry finally managed to stand up and the blood disappeared, he held out his hand. "Hello, my name is Harry. How are you doing?" Harry asked.
Harry was wondering why they were staring at him in terror. Then he looked where their gazes were. With widened eyes, Harry ran away before he lost anymore dignity. Stupids clothes and how flimsy they are.
Running quickly away, Harry found a little clearing in a small wooded area to hide inside. He started to run to the biggest tree, hoping to find shelter behind it. If Harry was watching his step, he would of noticed there was a rock in his path. As it was, it looked like the tree with the face was getting an early lunch.
The Wise One suddenly jolted back in his seat as the council started another meeting. The other god's gave him strange looks, due to him usually having an extremely calm personality. However, he only had one thought on his mind. 'Why does he use cherry flavored shampoo?
Eddard rushed towards the shrine to the old gods with his personal guard. It just had to be him who got a streaking immortal to land in his castle. Their footsteps pounded on the ground as they arrived to the shrine.
Eddard had a sudden urge to retire in a nice place, far away from here. The idiot who decided to fly into the castle had his head stuck in the mouth of the weirwood. In the attempts to get out, Harry was sticking his nude butt straight up in the air for all of them to see.
Hodor, who decided to follow Eddard, was very happy. He could finally have fun to someone without mother getting onto him. And so, the second shock of the day occurred. "Hodor… happy!" Hodor shouted.
Eddard almost cried. Now they had to hold down Hodor and pry the immortal from the shrine. Scratch that, Eddard did cry.