It had started simply enough: Haru had been complaining about doing math homework for her textiles major, Toto graoningly agreeing, then Muta mocking them because math is so easy. Muta of all people being good at math! Haru was surprised, then asked for help with her math homework. Then she and Toto both asked for help from Baron with their lit homework. Then next thing Haru knew the four of them were having biweekly study sessions where they were helping each other with their homework, even if it usually did devolve into them just hanging out and having fun Haru still insisted she got way more done than if she had been working alone. And for the most part, she was right. Everyone's grades had improved after the new tradition started, so they saw no reason to stop.

One such evening found them all gathered around Haru's dining room table while her mother had completely taken over the living room with her latest quilting disaster, which was her first step to making a new pattern. Everyone's books and paperwork were spread out around the table, Toto was typing away furiously at an old laptop with that wrinkle in his brow that was a sure sign of frustration. "Hey Baron," Toto started. "Can you take a look at what I've written so far?"

"Sure, Toto," Baron replied as he slid his chair over to stare awkwardly over Toto's shoulder.

"How'd you get that name, anyway?" Haru asked, looking up from the (hopefully) last math textbook she'd ever buy.

"What, Baron?" Baron asked in confusion. Haru just nodded.

"Oh, that's an easy one," Toto replied eagerly. "It all started in junior high..."

"Oh man! This story! Wait, let me get some popcorn!" Muta pushed back from the table and started digging through Haru's pantry.

Everyone rolled their eyes, but Baron obligingly read through Toto's essay while they waited for Muta to finish getting his popcorn ready. Once he was settled back in his seat, Toto started the story back up.

"It all started in junior high, this was back before we met Muta."

"Same high school, different junior highs," Muta supplied when Haru looked over at him.

"Anyway, we were putting on a play and Baron somehow talked me into trying out and for some reason I even managed to land a part. Don't ask me what, I can't remember anymore."

Haru closed her mouth and sheepishly looked down.

"All I remember is that Baron was playing a baron of some kind, and boy was he playing it up." Everyone giggled, some things just never change. "When we were trying on the costumes he was just strutting around, saying some ridiculous things, and generally being a big ham. Then one of the other actors dared him to wear the costume all day at school."

"He didn't!" Haru gasped in delighted horror.

"He did," Toto smugly insisted. "He came to school early, changed into the costume, and wore it all day long. Except for P.E., the teachers made him dress down for that like normal. So he spent all day strutting around the school, sneering at everyone and everything, and just all around acting like a royal pain. Everyone in the play was calling him Baron What's-his-face..."

"Baron Bomburst," Baron supplied.

"Well everyone in the play called him that all day long, but by the end everyone was just calling him Baron and well… it stuck."

"So what's your real name?" Haru asked.

Muta chuckled and ate a big handful of popcorn, it seemed this was the part he was waiting for.

"You don't remember?" Baron asked, looking for all the world like a kicked puppy.

"I know you said your name when we first met, but I just can't remember. Sorry," Haru said sheepishly.

"It's Humbert," Muta supplied gleefully.

"Humbert?" Haru asked, unable to hold back a peal of laughter.

"You didn't think it was so hilarious when I introduced myself."

"Sorry it's just… somehow it's perfect but at the same time doesn't suit you at all!" Haru tried to hide her giggles behind her hands as she spoke.

"It was my grandfather's name," Baron said with a great deal of dignity. "It's a fine old name with a lot of history… it's very dignified. It means 'bright warrior' and-"

"We mostly just called him Bert when we were younger," Toto cut in before Baron could go into a full rant about his name. Baron rewarded him with a glare that could cut through steel.

Haru dissolved into uncontrollable laughter over her math textbook while Muta was just shoveling the popcorn into his mouth with a huge grin on his face.

"What's going on in here? Is everyone alright?" Haru's mother asked from the entryway as she looked around the room in confusion.

"Nothing, nothing at all is going on in here. Just studying," Baron insisted while glaring at the others.

"Baron's real name is Humbert!" Haru gasped as she tried to get herself under control, but she just couldn't stop the giggles.

"Oh my," Mrs. Yoshioka said as she held a hand up to her mouth to try to hide her smile. She pulled herself under control and wagged a scolding finger at Haru, "That's no reason to be laughing at him, he has no control over what his parents named him."

"And Humbert's a perfectly good name," Baron added with desperation.

"Yes, a perfectly good name," Mrs. Yoshioka added, though she couldn't help the upward twitch of the corners of her mouth.

"They called him Bert in junior high," Muta added with a grin.

Haru's mother snorted and put both hands up to her face.

"Not you too, Mrs. Yoshioka," Baron begged.

"I'm sorry," she replied through suppressed laughter. "But… it just doesn't suit you at all!"

Baron sighed, "I know."

"What about your middle name?" Haru asked now that she had gotten herself more or less under control. "Couldn't you have gone by your middle name if you hate 'Bert' so much?"

"Nope." Baron stood up and started packing his things. "Toto, you too. We're leaving."

"But I don't even know your middle name either," Toto objected.

"And it's going to stay that way, c'mon."

"It must be bad," Haru said to Muta.

"Yeah, like Eugene… or Orville," Muta suggested. Baron just kept packing his things up while his face turned redder and redder.

"Or maybe Elmer… or Herbert," Haru mused.

"Humbert Herbert?" Toto asked skeptically.

Mrs. Yoshioka snorted again and fled back into the living room.

"Hey Baron," Muta asked as said young man shoved the last of his things into his bag and shouldered it. "What's your other grandfather's name?"

"Nope!" Baron declared before walking out of the room. Once he was gone the three remaining young adults burst into laughter.

"Poor Baron," Haru managed to gasp. "I feel kinda bad for laughing at him so hard."

"But you're still laughing," Toto pointed out.

"Yeah..." Haru said guiltily before bursting into another round of laughter.

"So you really don't know?" Muta asked as he leaned closer to Toto.

"I really don't." Toto insisted. "It'd be super easy to find out, but it's more fun this way."

Haru and Muta could only nod in agreement before another round of laughter filled the room.

This chapter dedicated to Jatd4ever, who dropped me a lovely review and chatted with me a bit about theater nerds and school and stuff. This was one of the ideas I told you about, and the most concrete one. I can't promise to write anything else any time soon, any other ideas for this AU are really vague and distant. But if you have something you'd like to see these guys do feel free to tell me, I love this little AU. I think we all need more drama student Baron in our lives.