Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays, you get another chapter :) I'm actually moving on to the next chapter for more editing right now.

I was going to put a rant here about negativity but then decided its not worth the energy I could be putting forward towards writing or editing my stories instead.

Please Review, and as always...

Enjoy!

Once aboard, they headed for the basic medical bay, and Anakin set Nakari down as carefully as he could. Then he turned to Luke.

"I know you won't be able to sleep and probably don't have an appetite, but I'll bring you something to eat." He looked pointedly at Nakari. "You'll need to keep your strength to continue helping her."

Luke collapsed into a seat next to her bed, running a hand down his face tiredly. He wasn't so sure if he'd even be able to stomach anything, though Anakin had a valid point. So he nodded, eyes riveted to Nakari as he placed his hand against her forehead once again. "Thank you, Father," he said, his voice a little on the raspy side. His touch was gentle and loving, but also fearful. He only dimly realized that he still had her blood all over him, but he didn't have the strength to do much about it, and he didn't think he had the heart yet, either. He was still rather numb from everything that had just happened, and with Nakari in a delicate balance between life and death, the blood smeared along his hands and arms, as well as his face and shirt, was the last thing on his mind.

Anakin made his way to the galley and whipped up the first meal he could find, also grabbing a bottle of water and then making his way back to the med bay.

On his way back, Derlin appeared in his path. "We're getting ready to take off. I'm sorry, but we have to help Drusil secure passage off-world before we can return to the fleet, but we will move as swiftly as we can."

Anakin nodded. "We understand."

He continued to the medical bay and paused at the sight of his son in such a state as he was now.

Anakin closed his eyes for a moment, then silently entered and set the tray of food down on a chair. He placed a hand on Luke's shoulder from behind and stood in silent support, knowing that a petty I'm sorry would be a pointless use of air.

Luke didn't even jump from his father placing a hand on his shoulder, though he hadn't been expecting the motion. When he registered that it was Anakin, he absentmindedly covered Anakin's hand with his own, grateful for the support as a few stray tears leaked past his defenses, his raging emotions over everything still waging within. As much as he would normally hate to admit it, he was still very unstable, but in his opinion it was understandably so.

Anakin stood by Luke until he felt the ship shudder. He broke free and stepped up to the bunk.

"Luke, we need to strap her in for the flight," he said softly. "And I know this isn't what you want to hear, but after we leave you're going to eat. I'll help you keep hold of Nakari."

Luke blinked like he was coming out of a daze, shifting uncomfortably but reaching over to help strap her in. "I don't think I can stomach anything right now," Luke told Anakin honestly. The ship shuddered again, and Luke realized grimly that he needed to move away from Nakari's side to strap in as well, at least until the ship made its jump.

Anakin settled in too while the ship moved, they waited for Drusil, and then the ship steadily climbed for the atmosphere. It wasn't too much longer until the tell-tale pull of the ship announced their jump to lightspeed. Anakin unstrapped promptly and held out a piece of food to Luke. "I know you don't think you can eat, but please try."

Luke's stomach roiled in protest, but he still took the piece of fruit Anakin held out to Luke. He took a small bite, swallowing with far too much difficulty as he gazed at Nakari. Part of him wanted to start opening up, but there was just so much churning inside of him, he wasn't even sure where to start: and he still felt a little cold from his brush with...

Luke paused, setting down the fruit as his stomach twisted dangerously, the fruit bitter in his mouth as he came to terms with the fact that he'd tapped into the dark side today. He hadn't used it, but he had certainly let it in, had felt and reached for it in his anger. His dream back at the hotel came back to him, and whatever appetite Luke might have had vanished.

Anakin frowned worriedly at Luke's sudden demeanor. "What is it?"

Luke shook his head, staring down at the fruit in his hand . "I just...I don't feel well." Luke explained lamely. That was the biggest understatement of his life.

Anakin sat back, studying Luke. He didn't quite believe him, and it wasn't due to a lack of trust on Anakin's part. It was the sense of guilt, shame...fear Luke emanated that told Anakin there was something else going on in his mind.

"Is this about what happened on the island? When you thought Nakari was dead?" he asked gently.

Luke tensed at his father's words, feeling his nausea intensify. Not trusting himself to speak, Luke simply nodded in answer. He waited until he trusted his voice to be even and his stomach wasn't so unsettled to speak. "Partially..."

Anakin pursed his lips. "Luke, you have nothing to be ashamed of."

"Yes, I do," Luke replied, not meeting Anakin's gaze. "I could have..." Luke shook his head, both to shake away the thought of what could have been and shake away his torturous nightmare. He rubbed subconsciously at his arm and shuddered at the thought of the vision, switched to a different statement that was the truth but also meant to mask the true source of his sudden fidgetiness. "I still feel that void, and I still feel so cold..."

Anakin reached over and placed a hand over Luke's. "Imagine how much colder you'd feel if you had given in and acted on those dark feelings?" He returned. "I can assure you through first-hand experience that you have done nothing wrong. You experienced the natural occurrence of anger and the desire for revenge. The important thing is that you didn't act on them."

Luke finally looked at Anakin, his nightmare still blazing in his mind. Those embers and small metal fragments Luke was suspicious represented the dark side had spread to infect his entire being as soon as they'd touched Luke. He'd been tainted only just in the dream, and it had overcome him. "I only stopped because I felt she was still alive, but she was..." he paused, unable to say the word dying while she still balanced between life and death. He struggled once more with one last statement. "What would have happened if she'd really...would I have been able to stop myself? And...what if there's ever a next time? Will I be as lucky then?"

Anakin looked down. "I can't preach about how one should always stay on the light, because I have dabbled in darkness myself...more than once. You already know of the Sand People, but I also killed Count Dooku while he was unarmed...actually that was right before I came to this timeline." Anakin sighed. "I've also choked people. But not to death...though usually because someone was there to put me in my place."

Anakin looked to his son again. "I felt good in the act...but afterwards I was always weighed down with my own guilt. The blood of others can be obscenely heavy to carry around. And while it's easier to come and you feel powerful, it's a fickle thing." Anakin paused. "My point is, there will be other times. You will get angry again, you'll want other people who do wrong by you or your loved ones to hurt. But you also have a choice. The choice to act, or not act on those thoughts. It's not an act of evil to feel, Luke, or to have bad thoughts."

The elder Skywalker tilted his head. "Do you know why the Dark Side is so intimidating? Truly?"

Luke shook his head, though he could name some rather terrifying things from his most recent vision. "No...we haven't really talked much about it," Luke said softly.

"Because it feeds off of your self-doubt," Anakin said. "You are strong, Luke, and your willpower is astounding. Your lack of self-confidence will be your undoing if you don't learn to bridle it."

Luke sighed. There was his self-confidence again. "I can't help it; every time I start to feel comfortable with myself or get some self-confidence...something happens to make me doubt again," Luke murmured, turning his gaze to Nakari's unmoving form on the medical bed.

Anakin nodded even though Luke couldn't see it. "Such is the unseen life of a Jedi. Do you think Obi-Wan, or any of the other Jedi never had doubts? I can say they did. But they learned to live with those doubts without allowing them to hinder or control them."

Luke glanced back at him, remaining silent and biting his tongue that so far Luke had stumbled through failure after failure...though at the same time...he had some success.

Though it seemed at the times when it really mattered to him on a personal level, he failed every time. Like right now, as the woman he loved was lying on the brink of death in front of him with him powerless to do much about it. As much as he took his father's advice to heart, sometimes...it was just hard to take it in that moment. Luke turned his gaze back to the nibbled-on fruit in his hand, unsure if he should try eating again. Almost as if it was making a point of impeding Luke's health, the dream came up again.

Your feeble skills are no match for the power of the dark side.

He held his shudder at bay, tensing, not having an excuse this time if he showed the internal struggle with his vision, finally speaking. "But every time it seems to matter to me on a personal level, I keep finding myself...not being enough, falling just short. What if one day everything is on the line and I'm not enough? I couldn't even budge a grenade a little off track to protect the woman I..."

Luke's voice cracked, and he found he couldn't finish the thought, the pain of what had just happened still too fresh to bring up.

Anakin hated to get philosophical on Luke, especially now, yet he felt it was imperative that Luke understand while he was still so receptive.

"Luke, when you tried to move that grenade, was your mind calm and focused?" he inquired.

Luke's shoulders sagged slightly, throat constricting. "No. I was terrified. But I wanted nothing more than to divert it from its path..."

Anakin held up a hand to stop his explanation. "Now, think back to when Nakari had her nightmare. What did you do in that instance?"

Luke's brow furrowed in confusion. What did that have to do with anything? "I...I held her until she calmed down, I made sure she didn't hurt herself and spoke to her until she realized she was safe..."

Anakin shook his head. "I mean before you got to her. Think, Luke...Your brain remembers, even if you don't consciously realize it."

Luke's brow furrowed in further confusion, racking his brain and trying to remember. "I was relaxed and calm in the cockpit...and I felt something was wrong...I ran back to see what was wrong..." he paused, realizing something was missing. He remembered running back to her bunk...but he didn't remember opening the door.

Anakin sensed Luke was close, and he made a go on gesture.

Luke looked back at Anakin, confused. "I never opened that door. I didn't pause...and I remember her closing it when she went to lie down..."

How had he ended up in that room then?

And then he realized what he was missing. The only possible explanation. He sat dumbfounded for a few moments before he spoke.

"I struggle with my telekinesis, but when she had that nightmare I opened the door with the Force before I even reached her bunk."

Anakin nodded, proud of his son. "Precisely. You didn't try to open those doors—you opened both the cockpit and bunk-room doors mind you—you just did it. And, despite sensing Nakari in trouble, you remained focused, level-headed. On Omereth, that wasn't the case, was it?"

Anakin held up a hand to forestall any oncoming protest. ''Before you say that situation was different, let me tell you that in the heat of the moment, it wasn't." He paused. "On the Jewel, when Nakari was in trouble, you had no real way of knowing if she was safe, just as on Omereth. It wasn't until you arrived that you saw she was only having a bad dream. I know the situations are different in scale, but the lesson remains the same: a level head and calm, focused mind are the keys to success. It has nothing to do with your personal life. It only feels that way because those people mean a great deal to you."

Luke leaned back, still placing the blame for Nakari's condition on himself. Even now he could still place the blame on himself by seeing that since he hadn't been able to keep a level head he hadn't been able to protect her.

Either way, he couldn't help the feeling that this was his fault. And his efforts wouldn't matter if...if Nakari didn't make it back to the fleet.

He would have been proud of himself for this discovery over his telekinesis had it been a different situation. He was silent again, staring at the floor now, rolling the fruit around in his hand subconsciously.

"I knew something was going to happen," Luke finally said. "I even felt that letting her go alone was a bad idea, that it was dangerous. That was why I was so terrified when we split up on the beach. I could feel the…the finality."

Luke ran his now dry blood-smeared fingers through his hair. Why hadn't he acted on those feelings? Nakari might have been perfectly fine right now if he had, smiling and laughing, teasing him...there to hear him tell her how he felt. He could hardly believe that it had just happened. It felt like it had been a lifetime ago, and yet...it might not have even been an hour yet.

Anakin closed his eyes. "This is going to sound heartless, but...take this as a lesson in trusting your gut. Your instincts won't lead you wrong, Luke."

A strangled sound rose in his throat, but didn't make it past his lips. Luke tore his eyes from Nakari, meeting his father's gaze with his own tortured one. "I can't lose her, too...especially not her. I haven't even told her..." He squeezed his eyes shut and looked away, fighting for control and to keep the tears from spilling over.

Anakin's heart cracked and he slipped from his chair to kneel next to Luke. He put a hand to Luke's head and gently tugged it to his chest.

"Let is out, Luke." Anakin's voice clogged with emotion. "It's okay to let it out."

Luke shook his head, still fighting for control but not fighting his father's embrace. No, he clung to Anakin, needful as the tears burned his eyes and his throat closed, making it difficult to speak. "I-if I let it o-out, I d-don't th-think I'll be a-able to stop," Luke managed to say, his breaths coming sharp and fast as he fought the sobs that wanted to come.

"There's nothing wrong with that," Anakin assured him softly. "I'll keep an eye on Nakari's presence." He urged Luke tighter into his embrace. "Let it out before it eats away at you." Anakin swallowed, feeling the odd urge to say one more thing and hoping Luke didn't think him strange for it. "Dad's here, Luke...I'm here..."

With that the fruit in Luke's hand dropped to the floor, long forgotten as he wrapped his arms around Anakin and just broke, the tears flowing rapidly as he wept into his father's shoulder, chest and shoulders heaving with the ferocity of his sobs. He didn't care if anyone saw him, Luke Skywalker the Hero of the Rebellion, crying brokenly in another man's arms. He didn't care—yet—that he was covered in Nakari's blood with nothing to change into. All he cared about was that Nakari had given him almost everything and nearly all of her, had made him happy again, and now she was lying on the brink of death because of him, having put herself out there and waited far too long for Luke to tell her how he felt, which he hadn't done verbally despite his many chances. Luke clung tighter to Anakin letting the elder Skywalker's embrace swallow him whole.

Anakin, while he didn't sob, had a wet face too, but true to his word he held Nakari as Luke wept. Anakin tightened his hold on Luke, whispering meaningless words of comfort and just letting him cry.

It was a long, long time before Luke didn't have any more tears to spill, though he still felt like crying. He was spent, his exhaustion a heavy burden upon his shoulders, yet he didn't feel he could sleep—he'd be plagued with nightmares or, worse so, visions. And he wasn't willing to take his eyes off Nakari long enough to sleep, not when she wasn't even in a fully functioning med bay like she needed to be.

Worn and weak, Luke clung to Anakin, his face slick with tears that had wet the blood on his face again as he buried into Anakin's embrace.

Anakin didn't mind the blood smearing on his tunic, but he did want to help Luke clean up some. He spied a washcloth near a wash basin and used the Force to wet the cloth and send it to his hand.

He then pulled back and used fatherly care to gently wash Luke's face. His motions were slow and careful, especially cautious around his son's airways.

Luke was grateful for his father's gesture, holding as still as he could as he cleaned Luke's face of Nakari's blood. He stiffened minutely when the cloth came close to Luke's airways, but he was able to get himself to relax each time, eyes closed as he leaned into his father for support.

Anakin finished his task and tossed the rag into the sink, summoned a new one and began to wash the rest of Luke's exposed skin.

As he worked, he spoke softly. "She knows you love her, Luke. I saw it every time she looked at you."

Luke sucked in a rattling breath, the ache in his heart panging anew. "I still should have told her...I tried, several times, but..."

Anakin bit his lip. "Maybe you told her in other ways. I know Owen wasn't very vocal, and he probably rarely if ever spoke of his love for Beru and you, but that didn't change the fact that you both knew he did love you.''

Luke hesitated, mind flashing back to the hotel for a moment. "I tried to show her, and I know I did sometimes but...it's not the same as telling her out loud. And I know that was what she was waiting for."

Anakin knew that, too, but he had been trying to ease Luke's burden. He sighed. "No...no, it's not the same. I know I told you this all before, so I won't repeat myself. Just...make it a priority to tell Nakari every day after this."

Luke felt his throat tighten. "I plan on it. Every way I can think of. I don't want there to be a trace or ghost of a doubt."

If she even makes it...a devilish voice whispered in the back of his mind. It sounded chillingly like Vader, which only soured Luke's mood more.

Luke looked up at his father. "I know you're trying to help, and I'm sorry I'm not very receptive, but...there's just too much that can't be fixed right now..." Luke said brokenly, thinking not only of Nakari, but also his demolished self-esteem and confidence, his nightmare, his brush with the dark side, and release of all his emotions back on the island.

Anakin squeezed Luke's forearm. "I'm not upset, Luke. I was the same way when I lost my mother. Looking back I feel bad for Padmé because I pretty much threw a temper tantrum that afternoon." Anakin released his hold. "And if you want to be alone, I'll understand. Just promise me you'll eat something to keep your strength up."

"No!" Luke said, perhaps too quickly. "Please, stay, I..." He trailed off, unable to accurately label the fear that made him want his father to stay. He wanted the companionship—he didn't want to be alone, facing the possibility of losing Nakari...facing everything...

Anakin replaced his hand on Luke's arm. "I'll stay " he said simply. Then, adamant since Luke was seriously dragging now, he picked up the tray and held it out with a lifted brow.

Luke refrained from sighing as he'd just asked Anakin to stay, taking the tray from Anakin and poking around at the food, picking away at the light things first as he settled back into his chair, watching Nakari with a faraway look, choosing to dwell on their night together in the hotel over what had happened on the island. He clung to those memories like a lifeline, desperate for the calming balm on top of the comfort his father offered.

Anakin watched Luke to make sure he ate enough. Only when he was satisfied did he relent his attention. Sensing that Luke was trying to dwell on happier times, he bit his lip, trying to think of one to share...until he sensed that Luke's current thought was a very private one.

Anakin wisely retreated and simply sat with Luke, waiting for him to speak when he wanted to and lending his strength as he felt it was needed.

Luke sat in silence for quite some time, reliving his moments with Nakari, remembering skin against skin, stolen kisses, stolen moments...

The memory of their shower moment, however, prompted Luke to speak, as off topic and random as it would probably seem to Anakin.

"Thank you by the way...for the conversation we had back on Kupoh..." Luke told him quietly. "It helped."

Anakin nodded. "I'm glad."

A knock on the door turned Anakin's head, and he saw Major Derlin standing there. The man cleared his throat softly.

"I'm sorry to intrude, but I wanted to let you know we will arrive at the fleet in four hours," He said apologetically. "I also commed ahead and told them to have a medic ready."

Anakin nodded. "Thank you, Sir."

Derlin paused, taking in Luke's outfit. "Commander Skywalker, if you want to shower, I can set up a room for you, and get you fresh clothes."

Luke hesitated, knowing that Anakin would watch Nakari if he left, but reluctant to leave her in general. "I'll...I'll be fine if it's just four hours, Major. I'd like to make sure Ms. Kelen is going to be all right before I do anything for myself. I'll change and get a shower when we're back with the fleet," Luke said softly.

Derlin nodded. "Let me know if I can do anything to help."

Luke nodded respectively. "Thank you, Sir," Luke told him just as softly. He waited until the Major had left to return his attention to Nakari, leaning forward and brushing the hair from her face in a gesture of well-practiced tenderness that had come out of their close experiences together: both physical and emotional.

At the tender action, Anakin remembered an observation from before their arrival on Omereth. "Luke, may I ask you something?"

Luke leaned back from Nakari, looking at his father. "Of course," he said, wondering what was on Anakin's mind.

"Did you tell Nakari about...Maridun?" Anakin asked, hesitant to bring such a sensitive topic up right now. "Because after that night we spoke...well, something big happened between the two of you. I could tell, even if I let you have your privacy."

Luke shuddered slightly, although for once it wasn't because of his memories of Maridun. "She asked me to show her, yes. And despite my warnings, she would settle for nothing less. So I did...even if I didn't necessarily like it," Luke explained, gaze fixated on Nakari as he spoke. he could feel her body go limp in his arms, and the steam of the shower again...

Anakin nodded. "I know it wasn't easy to do, but just look at how much closer it brought the two of you."

"Among other things but...yes," Luke said with a small nod, his hand lowering to grasp Nakari's. "It did bring us closer..."

Anakin left it at that, and then fell quiet. The remainder of the trip consisted of Luke gazing at Nakari and trying to stay alert, and Anakin supporting him with the Force and other means.

Anakin breathed a sigh of relief when Derlin announced their revert to realspace, followed by the shudder of the ship doing so.

"Get her ready to transport, Luke." Anakin stood from his seat. "Can you carry her or would you like me to do so?"

"I can carry her," Luke said in a voice that was quite deceitful of how worn he truly was. He relied heavily on the Force to stand and carry out the task of getting Nakari ready to be moved, anxious admittedly afriad that she felt so much fainter in the Force then when they'd left Omereth. Despite it all, Luke gathered her in his arms, holding her tight to his chest once she was ready to be moved. He kissed the top of her head and breathed in her scent, praying to the Force that she would be all right. Anakin was vigilant at Luke's side as they hurried for the landing ramp, supporting Luke through the Force and ready to catch Luke or Nakari should Luke's artificial strength fail him. The men of the ship asked no questions and promptly got out of the way as the Skywalkers rushed past, well aware of Nakari's dire situation.

Leia, meanwhile, stood in the hangar bay, waiting anxiously for the arrival of the ship bearing her friends. She was impatient to see both Luke and Anakin, but she was also on edge for some unknown reason.

Luke was back, so why wasn't she happier?

Her answer came—complete with a soft, shocked gasp from her own lips—when the boarding ramp of the ship lowered to reveal Luke and Anakin Skywalker, hustling down the ramp with a limp and potentially mortally wounded Nakari Kelen.

But it was Luke's bloodied appearance that made Leia pale. She was frozen to the spot to see him covered in blood from the neck to the knees of his pants. He looked haggard, like he hadn't slept in days.

Leia only came to when the medic brushed past Leia with a stretcher.

"Luke! What..." Leia hesitated. "What happened?"

"Bounty hunters at Omereth," Luke said in a clipped, exhausted tone to both the medic and Leia. "She was hit by two grenades. We did what we could, but she's still dying. Please, you have to help her," Luke pled the last part with the medic, adrenaline starting to pour in again and giving him the strength to keep up with the medic as they moved to the med bay. It also fueled his panic and worry. He held Nakari's hand securely in his own, unwilling to leave her side as they moved.

Anakin followed behind Luke, Leia, and—surprisingly—Han Solo, who he had only just noticed was there. Anakin's distraction was understandable—he knew that the medics were going to deny Luke access to the ER operating area, and considering the state he could sense his son was in, he was more than prepared to drag Luke away kicking and hollering if need be.

Luke clung tightly to Nakari both within and without, through the Force and physically. As the medics traded rushed words Luke tuned them out, his eyes for Nakari alone as he silently pled for her to be all right.

So focused was he on Nakari that when he was initially pulled away from her they did so successfully, catching him off guard. But the moment his brain registered that she'd been pulled away, and he felt his hold on her start to dip from the increasing distance between them, he threw himself back to the stretcher with a loud protest, grasping for her again and terrified for her to disappear behind the doors without him, clinging desperately to her in the Force as two pairs of strong arms hooked around him to hold him at bay.

All the while he shouted pleas to stay with her, that he needed to be there for her. The statement that he couldn't leave her because this was his fault passed his lips unbidden, but he was too desperate to really care, the panic restricting the breath in his chest as he fought to get back to her.

Anakin's heart cracked further at Luke's exclamation that Nakari's predicament was his fault, and he actually froze up, which allowed the frantic Luke to slip away from him.

"Kid, stop!" Han shouted when the smuggler was suddenly pitched forward due to the abrupt lack of aid in holding Luke.

But Luke was past listening, even as Nakari was pushed through another set of doors and out of sight.

Luke didn't really hear or register much. All that made it through was the fact that Nakari was no longer in his line of sight, whisked away as she started to fade from his senses, growing further away with every second. Luke grasped desperately at her presence in the Force, subconsciously shoving whatever or whoever was still holding him back with the Force while simultaneously pitching himself forward with a bout of adrenaline-only strength. That move landed him sprawling on the floor as it wrenched him free of the grip on him, but he was still geared solely to get back to Nakari before his energy left him.

"No! I have to—I have to be there! I have to if she doesn't make it, I have to be with her, please!"

Anakin heard Han swear as he struck the wall, then the Jedi was moving, seizing control of the moment with the experience of a seasoned General.

"Clear the room!" he barked at the others, his voice laden with a steel they hadn't heard from him yet.

By the Force, he was going to get through to his son, and he needed some privacy to do so.

Anakin barely noticed when Han and Leia obeyed, Han muttering something under his breath. Anakin moved rapidly to intercept Luke when the young man somehow managed to return to his feet and began a wild sprint for the doors Nakari had disappeared behind.

Anakin grabbed his son with an iron grip in the Force and held him rock-still while the younger man continued to rail.

Anakin felt Luke trying to break his hold, but that only made Anakin solidify his grip even more. Since he was fully trained and more experienced, it was a simple, though heartbreaking task for him to overpower Luke.

"Luke, stop!" Anakin ordered, coming around to face the young man.

Luke wanted to look away, and he tried to, but Anakin was holding Luke completely still, head included. It would have been terrifying under different circumstances. His chest heaved, but he managed another desperate plea, attention at least halfway divided from Nakari as reality slowly began to settle in, draining his energy as it fell over him.

"I have to be in there with her! Father, please!" Luke begged, heart still openly bleeding over everything that had happened.

Anakin shook his head. "I can't let you do that, Son. I'm sorry. And before you protest, how would you like to be responsible for Nakari not making it because you forced your way to her side, thus blocking the medics? What if they need to act immediately to save her, but they have to wait for you to move out of the path?" The words tore at his throat like glass, but he kept at it.

"And for the love of the Force Luke, how the hell do you get off saying her condition is your fault?" Now Anakin was angry. "Tell me!"

Luke squeezed his eyes shut, sucking in a sharp breath. The fact that Anakin's anger was directed at him was actually a horrifying thought. He hadn't said anything about that particular thought of his because he'd known how quickly Anakin would shoot it down despite how convinced Luke was that it was his fault. His breathing grew ragged, though he still managed to reply. His voice shook and was small—he knew that no matter what he said, Anakin would deny that it was Luke's fault.

"I swore I'd protect her; I should have been there," Luke whispered. "I shouldn't have let her go alone, I should have gone with her, I should have stopped that grenade."

Before Anakin could recycle his argument over the grenade from earlier, Luke expanded on it. "And I should have gotten ahold of myself enough to at least put the grenade off course.

Anakin looked away, willing himself to calm down with some effort. "I can tell you don't want to hear this, and nothing I say will change your outlook, but I'm going to say it anyway."

Anakin stepped forward and gently took Luke's chin in his grasp despite the fact that his son's eyes were still shut.

"It was not your fault. It was a battle, and whether you like it or not, things happen in battle that no one has control over." Anakin dropped his hand. "What you really need to do is calm down. Let the medics do their job."

He paused. "I'm going to release you now…can I trust you not to try anything?"

Luke would have sagged in defeat if Anakin didn't have him in the steel grip. He kept his eyes shut but nodded, the fight leaving him empty, hollow, and rather depressed. With it went the last of his adrenaline as well, and the exhaustion broadsided him.

Anakin released Luke, only to watch him immediately collapse.

"Luke!"

Anakin swore and leapt forward to catch him, but Luke had already hit the ground. Anakin dropped down beside him, lifting him to sit up and holding him against his chest.

Luke found it alarming that he didn't even have the strength to push himself up, and was in turn extremely grateful for his father picking him off of the floor. The impact had hurt, but he was too tired and frankly rather numb inside to really care much that it hurt.

"I'm okay...I'm okay..." he murmured, even his voice strained. He was even too tired to reach for the Force for more strength, but yet he couldn't close his eyes, as heavy as they were half-lidded. He couldn't sleep or lose consciousness; he had to be sure that Nakari was stable first, he had to know that she would be all right.

Anakin sighed in frustration. "No, you're not okay, Luke, you need rest."

Luke snorted softly. "I meant I'm okay as in I'm not hurt," he expanded. He felt so weak...

"I can't rest yet, I..." he sighed. What was the point? Anakin would insert reason into the situation and insist he rest, no matter how badly Luke wanted to wait to know Nakari's condition. Giving in to the fact his father would knock Luke out if he had to in order to get Luke to sleep, he tried for a different plea. He didn't want to go back to his room; it was too far away from what was happening. "Just don't make me leave her. Not any more than now..."

His words were becoming a little slurred; he'd almost forgotten that he too had almost died today, though Nakari's life was still in the balance. Luke was just tired and worn out.

Anakin relented. "Deal, but I'm not leaving your side, either, at least not for a while."

Without waiting for a reply or permission, Anakin deftly stood and picked Luke up in his arms. He carried him to a long row of flat, semi-soft chairs and laid him down, holding his head up long enough to sit down before resting Luke's head on his leg.

"Rest. I'll wake you the second they have news of any kind," Anakin said softly.

"Thank you," Luke murmured, already drifting off into a deep, blessedly dreamless sleep.

Anakin sat silently with Luke for a few wondrously uneventful hours before the door to the waiting room opened and Leia poked her head in.

"May we join you?" she asked softly, so as to not wake Luke.

Anakin reflected that while the gesture was a kindness, it was probably a futile one as well, since Luke was out cold and wouldn't wake anytime soon. In fact, the younger man hadn't shifted at all from his original position, so deeply asleep was he.

"Sure." Anakin frowned, seeing only the princess. "Who's we?"

Leia stepped inside with Han on her tail, and Anakin made an ah lift with his head.

"I'm sorry about what Luke did earlier, Solo," Anakin told the smuggler.

Han grimaced. "It's alright, he didn't mean it."

Anakin was grateful for the man's understanding. "You're a good man, Solo."

"Don't tell him that," Leia quipped. "It might go to his head."

Anakin chuckled, even as Han adopted his best innocent look.

"Who, me?" the man asked.

Leia rolled her eyes, approaching Anakin. The Jedi found himself entranced by her, seeing Padme in the young woman more and more each time they met. He hadn't forgotten his relation to Leia, or his promise to keep that under wraps for her sake.

But that didn't mean he couldn't spend time with her.

"How have you been, Princess?" Anakin asked quietly.

She took a seat on the other side of him, smiling softly at Luke before answering. "Things have been better since we received Drusil's information. We already have a plan in the works for what we can do with this new data."

Anakin smirked. "That's good. But I meant how have you been?"

Leia blinked. "Oh. Well..." Anakin wondered if anyone else cared to ask the young woman such a question. "I've been stressed, I won't lie. I...Well, I also miss home...my family."

Leia hesitated, as if wondering why she was admitting those things to Anakin. "But I've been worse."

Anakin studied her carefully before speaking. "I'm certain Bail and Breha would be proud of you, Leia."

Her eyes shot to his, and Anakin held her gaze, willing her to see his sincerity. Then she softened and tentatively rested her head against Anakin's shoulder. He smiled and wrapped a gentle arm about her.

"I haven't really had anyone to talk to about...Alderaan," Leia confessed. "But for some reason it just...feels okay. It's almost...natural to speak of, well, anything. I don't know why that is."

Anakin knew why, but he asked something in return rather than giver her the answer. "Does my knowing these things upset you?"

"...No," Leia replied honestly. "And that's the strangest part about it."

Anakin shrugged lightly. "I'm just a likeable guy, I guess," he teased.

Leia rewarded him with a smile before she returned her attention to Luke. "He's fallen hard, hasn't he?"

Anakin didn't have to ask for clarification. Leia could see the love Luke held for Nakari as well. Anyone could.

"Yes," Anakin replied simply.

Another brief pause, then, "I wish I had someone to care about me like Luke cares for Nakari." Leia whispered.

Anakin's heart clenched. "I care."

The words slipped out before he could stop himself, and he tensed as Leia sat up, eyeing him oddly.

"Well...thank you, but..." she began hesitantly.

"No, not like that, I swear," Anakin hastened to reassure her. "I just meant that you can come to me with anything, any time."

Leia relaxed. "Oh." She eyed him. "Mind if I ask why you care so much?"

Anakin hesitated. "Honestly? You promise not to judge, or take offense?"

"I do."

He nodded. "You remind me of my wife. And I'm sorry if you think I'm using you as an outlet for my wish to see her again, that's not the case. I really do care. Bail and Breha were good friends with my wife, and they were always high-ranked in my book. And I'm honored to help look after their daughter."

Leia's eyes widened. "You're married?"

Anakin nodded. "It's a...well, not common knowledge."

Leia lifted her brows, then shrugged. "Well, who am I to judge? If you're happy, then so be it."

Anakin smiled. "Thank you."

Han, who was still standing, chose to come forward at that moment. "Have you had anything to eat of late?"

Anakin's stomach answered for him with a loud rumble, and he had the decency to look slightly abashed. "No."

Leia chuckled softly. "I'll get you something to eat."

Anakin reluctantly let her go with a quiet thanks, and Han soon sat a seat over from where Leia had been.

"So, are you here to stay?" Anakin asked after a time.

"I haven't officially joined, but I've done a few supply runs for them," Han answered. "I don't want to commit totally. I have...old debts to pay off."

Anakin nodded. "That'd be a good thing to clear up."

Han snorted. "No kidding."

Whatever would have been said next was cut off when Leia returned with a sandwich and a drink for Anakin. There was a small cafeteria near the medbay for the patients and visitors, so the trip was a quick one.

"Thank you, Princess."

Anakin devoured the meal in record time, not caring how he looked. It was the first real food he'd had since they had left Kupoh.

However, just as he finished, the door to the ER opened, and Anakin instantly zeroed in on the man who came through. "Are you all here for Miss. Kelen?"

"Yes," Anakin answered promptly.

"I'm afraid she's still in surgery, but we've hit a complication."

Anakin went cold. "Wait a moment." He looked to Luke, loath to wake him: but he'd promised, so he carefully shook Luke's shoulder. "Luke...Luke, wake up."

Luke could feel the change when he went from a deep sleep to slowly returning to consciousness, though his exhaustion made it very difficult to pull himself out of it. Someone was...shaking him, was it? He couldn't quite tell because it felt so far away, and he distantly heard a voice that sounded like it was saying his name.

"Luke." Anakin shook him harder. "Come on, Luke, wake up."

...Luke, wake up...

That was...that was his father. His brain remembered the conversation Anakin had with Luke before Luke had fallen asleep, about Anakin waking him up if there was a development on...

Nakari.

Almost like he'd been jolted with electricity, he jerked awake, eyes flying open as he nearly fell off of his father's lap from the suddenness of the movement. The world spun and he was groggy, but he was sharp enough to make out the medic standing off to the side and didn't waste time with the Are you all right exchanges the others no doubt wanted to have with him, focusing on the medic alone.

"How is she?" he asked, his voice tired and hoarse. He winced at the sound.

The medic grimaced. "Miss Kelen lost a dangerous amount of blood. She needs an emergency transfusion. We don't have her blood type on hand, however. Not the amount she needs, anyway."

Anakin pursed his lips. "What's her type?"

"A negative."

Anakin shook his head. "I'm sorry, but I'm not a match."

"I'm A negative," Han spoke up, rising. "Take what you need form me."

Luke's gaze shifted from the medic to his smuggler friend, just now noticing that Han and Leia were there. It was the first time he'd realized Han was back from the pursuit of money, and he wondered how long the smuggler had been there. Luke would have grabbed the smuggler into a bone-crushing hug if he'd had the strength to do so, the gratitude rushing through him in a great flood.

"Thank you, Han, so much," Luke told him sincerely, emotion clogging his throat. Han seemed to be unsure of how to react to the raw emotion Luke was showing him, shifting somewhat uncomfortably.

"Of course, Kid; anything to help, especially if she means so much to you," Han told him, stepping forward hesitantly and facing the medic. "Where do you need me?"

The medic took Han back with a promise to the others that he would bring news once he had more to give. That left the Skywalkers alone.

Anakin looked at Luke. "Well, you aren't completely rested, obviously, but you don't look nearly as exhausted as before."

Luke heard, but something else was on his mind. Hearing that Nakari's life was at risk because of blood loss whilst he was coated in her blood...he suddenly felt very, very nauseous; dangerously so.

He closed his eyes, putting a hand against Anakin to steady himself. "I don't feel so well...I think I'd like to find a change of clothes now..." Luke murmured, head spinning still from his sudden awakening and movement. He couldn't help but be horribly aware of the blood-soaked clothes sticking to his body, the red all over him—Nakari's blood...

Anakin steadied Luke with a worried frown. "Okay, let's get you cleaned up. We have time."

He stood, urging Luke up as well.

Luke rose to his feet with great effort, leaning into his father for support instead of drawing on the Force. He staggered, both from the dizziness and from the exhaustion. "I think I'm going to be sick..." he muttered, allowing Anakin to lead him.

Anakin felt the same warning in the Force and swiftly lifted Luke into his arms. He raced for the nearest refresher, making it inside the door and hurriedly setting Luke down before the toilet. The young man promptly made good on his hunch, and Anakin was grateful they'd made it in time.

Luke's tired body was racked by the exertion, and what little food he had was quickly gone, leaving him with several long moments of painful dry heaving before he felt it was finally over. He leaned against the toilet bowl, gasping in air before he sent the pathetic mess down the drains. He rested his head against the toilet seat, trying to catch his breath. But when he saw the red again, he only felt the nausea return. He peeled off his blood-soaked tunic with a dizzying fervor, suddenly desperate to get Nakari's blood as far from him as possible. She was dying, she'd very nearly bled to death in his arms, she could still die from the blood loss now, and he'd been wearing her blood on him for the past...well, he no longer knew how many hours, as he didn't know how long he'd been passed out in the waiting room.

Anakin grabbed the shirt away from Luke and tossed it into the garbage bin without a word. A tentative knock on the door sounded behind him, and he went to the door, cracking it open to see a concerned Leia standing there.

"Is he going to be alright?" she fretted nervously. "Does he need anything?"

"Actually, a change of clothes and a prompt shower," Anakin said softly. "We need the nearest shower, this is a public refresher without a shower."

Leia nodded. "Can he walk yet?"

Anakin glanced over his shoulder. "No, but I'll help him."

Anakin did so, helping Luke up again before the other could argue, and they followed Leia out the door.

"Someone might want to take out the garbage before they find the old shirt, Princess." Anakin couldn't help the brief moment of dark humor at the thought, but let it pass as Leia granted them access to an unused room.

"I'll bring fresh set of clothes and a towel, but the water and such are already in the shower, standard issue," Leia told them.

"Thank you," Anakin replied, closing the door and then setting Luke into a sitting position on the bed. "Are you going to be okay to shower?"

Luke took a few deep breaths, then nodded. "Yes, I think I will," Luke replied softly. He tested how well he could support his own weight as he continued speaking. "It'll have to be a quick shower, but...the dizziness if fading. I should be fine..."

The dizziness was fading, though he still felt nauseous and, of course, drained.

Anakin nodded. "Just scrub really well. I'll wait in here and bring the towel in when it gets here."

Luke returned the nod. "Thank you, Father," Luke told him, rising carefully to his feet and making his way to the refresher. He was slow only because he was weak, though he was quick to peel out of the blood soaked clothes and turn on the water. The water at the bottom of the shower turned pink the instant he got in, and he felt his stomach rebel again, though this time he managed to keep the contents of his stomach down. He leaned his head against the wall, letting the jets run down his body for several long moments to regain his bearings before he started to vigorously scrub. He wanted to get rid of all traces of Nakari's blood on his skin, and he was successful, though some spots were rubbed raw by the time he was done. He stayed under the water long enough for his aches to be soothed, washing his hair just as thoroughly as everything else when he remembered running his bloody hands through his hair.

Finally done, Luke stepped out, already tired from exertion and ready to get back to Nakari. He still felt sick, but he didn't think he was about to throw up again.

Anakin, true to his word, had left Luke a towel, and once the younger Skywalker was out, Anakin stood from where he'd been waiting.

"Mind if I wash up too?" he asked. "I promise to hurry. If you want to go back, I'll just catch up when I'm done."

Luke hesitated. He wasn't quite sure he'd make the trip down the hall by himself, so he opted to wait, sitting down on the bed. "I can wait," Luke said, allowing his body to relax against the bed. Though his body was weak and he was exhausted, his soul, mind, and heart was restless, his concern for Nakari his driving thought. To distract himself, he let his mind roam back to their kiss back in the cockpit...their fiery kiss at the hotel...Luke holding her in his arms and comforting her after her nightmare and their heartfelt conversation afterwards...

...their plans to stargaze together...

His heart clenched at the reminder, and Luke swore to take Nakari stargazing the first chance he got if she survived. He would make it happen, one way or another. Maybe it would be the first thing they did when she got out of the hospital if she was cleared for travel.

Anakin was true to his word, showering and changing clothes rapidly. He felt much better, and he breathed a refreshing sigh before he returned to Luke's side.

"Ready to go back?" he asked, noting fresh tear tracks on his son's face. He wanted to offer words of comfort, but he didn't know what to say.

Anakin didn't know either if Nakari would survive this, and it hurt to see Luke suffering so much.

Luke carefully rose to his feet, turning into Anakin both for support and for comfort. "Yes, I'm ready," he said, head leaning against his father's shoulder as Anakin put an arm around Luke to support him during the trip down.

Anakin gladly helped Luke, and he kept his arm around his son even after they had chosen new seats in the lounge.

Leia looked up from where she sat as they entered. "I can't stay much longer, I just wanted to be here while you were gone in case they had news." She stood to leave, stepping forward and giving Luke a hesitant embrace. "I hope thing work out for the best."

"Thank you, Leia," Luke murmured into her shoulder, holding her in the strongest embrace he could muster. He couldn't help but notice that, at the moment, in his father's and Leia's embrace, things seemed right with the exception of Nakari's absence. He didn't hold to Leia long, releasing her after a few moments so she could go where she needed to. Now they were just waiting for Han and more news. Luke held tight to his father the entire time, both for comfort and support.

It was a few more hours before the same medic came back out to them, looking as exhausted as Luke did. Anakin started to stand, but the doctor held up a hand to halt the movement.

"I'll join you. It'll be nice to sit a moment, if you don't mind." The man seated himself while the Skywalkers looked on anxiously.

"She is currently stable, but she is still extremely weak. Now, she obviously had shrapnel wounds, but some of those pieces ran quite deep. I saw that some of the pieces had already been removed. That was a very risky thing to attempt, because some of the piece pierced Miss. Kelen's organs. We have patched up and repaired all the damage we could find. She also suffered some burns from the initial grenade blasts. Those will heal, but she may possibly have scars, though it's too early to say."

The man paused for breath. "Miss Kelen also, as we said, lost blood. And finally, the concussions from the bombs stressed her entire body, including the nervous system. She may be shaky for a time after all is said and done."

"But she will live, right?" Luke asked fearfully. He would gladly help her through a recovery as lengthy as the medic was talking. Injuries Luke could live with. Death...

The man hesitated noticeably. "I...Honestly? I don't know how she made it here in the first place. If you don't believe in miracles, you should really reconsider. She is alive and we have done all we can for her, but the rest, I'm afraid, is up to her. Miss Kelen's body must accept all the blood and work done to it."

Luke closed his eyes and took a shaky breath. "She'll make it," he said in a firm voice that betrayed his own condition. He wasn't speaking from a feeling in the Force, but from the burning desire in his heart. She had to make it. She couldn't leave him. He wouldn't leave her side until she woke up.

The medic pursed his lips, but continued on. "She is out of surgery, but in an intensive care unit room as we speak. She will remain there for a minimum of two days before we attempt bacta submersion. If she shows improvement or if she doesn't relapse within those two days, we will commence the bacta treatment. She will be in the tank for four days."

"How long until we can see her again?" Luke asked softly, knowing he might have to wait until after her bacta treatments. It would all depend.

The man clearly saw Luke's need to see her, remembering no doubt Luke's frantic attempts to not let her go when she was brought in.

"I can permit you a few minutes to see her, but you must wear protective clothing and you may not touch her." The man gave Luke an apologetic look. "I'm afraid that's the best I can do. Her condition is extremely fragile still, and until she's submerged in bacta, I want her to be touched as little as possible. Once she's in bacta, you may sit outside the tank."

Luke nodded. He could still touch her through the Force—or at least touch her presence. He rose shakily to his feet. "Lead the way," he said in a trembling tone. He wouldn't touch her for fear of harming her, but he could speak to her and reach out to her in the Force; he just needed to see with his own eyes that she was all right.

Anakin stayed behind to allow Luke privacy, so the medic led Luke to a room to wash up and get prepared to see the patient.

"Remember, no touching," the medic said seriously. "I cannot stress enough how fragile she is right now. And only for a few minutes. We must leave her room free of clutter and obstacles in case of an emergency."

He led Luke to the door. "Wait in between the inner and outer doors. Once the outer door shuts, put your shoe guards on and go in. When you leave, wait for the inner door to close before you open the outside door."

He paused. "Do you have any questions?"

Luke shook his head. "No, I understand," Luke told him.

His heart ached at how fragile Nakari was, but he kept that to himself. Following the doctor's instructions, Luke waited for each door respectively, putting on the shoe guards when he was supposed to. When he finally was able to open the outside door, he felt his heart leap into his throat to see Nakari lying on the bed with all the tubes and wires and needles and—

Don't think about that, Luke scolded himself. You've only got a few minutes, so make it count.

Slowly, Luke approached Nakari, refraining from touching her physically. He did, however, stretch out with the Force, tenderly caressing her presence in the Force with all the love he felt for her. He stood right next to the bed, eyes tracing the almost peaceful lines of her face before he spoke in a soft voice. He sent his words through the Force as well, unsure if she could hear him whether it be from his spoken words or from sending the same words to her through the Force.

"I'm here, Nakari," Luke whispered. "I'm not going to leave you, but you can't leave me. Please, don't give up. Stay, keep fighting."

He wanted terribly to stroke her cheek, but he had to settle for caressing her presence lovingly, willing her to grow stronger. Tears stung at his eyes but he held them at bay, determined to finish speaking. "Even if you can't see me, or hear me, or Force-forbid feel me...I'm still here. I won't leave you, I'm here, I'll be here when you wake."

His heart throbbed. "Please Nakari...hold on. I need you, and I need you to survive, to wake up so I can tell you what I've been trying to say for so long..." He sighed, closing his eyes. "I need to tell you I love you..." he murmured.

She was trapped, floating weightlessly in a sea of utter darkness. There was nothing: no sound, no light, nothing to smell or touch...and it was utterly depressing. She felt as though she were trapped and somehow suspended inside the galaxy's deepest, darkest cave with no sense of direction.

She was suffocating from the lack of everything that had once made her human...comfortable.

Yet, as much as she wished to break from this prison, she was so, so weak. She had no energy: she was drained of strength to the point that it hurt just to be in this suspended state. She was drained simply by thought...though she tried and tried to recall even the smallest detail.

Like who she was.

What was her name?

She wanted to weep, so lost and lonely did she feel.

So cold...afraid...disoriented...her senses ached from the void that was the only thing available to them.

Then...wait, was that...warmth? She had forgotten what warmth was, and it nearly scalded her, so different was it from the bitter cold of her current placement.

She instinctively tried to move closer to the source, but she was unable to. Then there was...sound...

Her ears rang painfully at the forgotten ability, and she didn't hear what was said.

Then, alarmingly, there was a touch to her mind...and this time, though it wasn't verbal, she heard.

It was a voice...a familiar one. Who was it? She tried to focus on the words, but only one stuck.

Nakari...

Who was Nakari?

Wait...that word felt right! It was like the word was her...it was her name!

She was Nakari!

Too soon the sense of warmth and the comfort it had brought left and Nakari was desperate to get it back, even if she didn't know the source. Why did the heat have to leave?

Now the cold was so much more bitter...and try as she might, she was too weak to do anything about it.

Nakari was forced to settle back into the void which held her captive, and yet, she found the strength to let loose a single, heartbroken tear.

Luke had stayed as long as he could, gently caressing Nakari's presence in the Force and whispering words of comfort and gentle pleas until he'd been told his time was up. As much as he wanted to rebel, he obeyed, leaving like a kicked pup because of how much it hurt to separate from her. He pulled away from her in the Force as he focused on getting out of the sanitary clothes he was in, which was a great effort considering his current state. By the time he returned to the waiting room he was almost as weary as he'd been earlier, though he reflexively stretched for Nakari's presence again in the Force while he approached Anakin, as if to reassure himself that she was still there.

Anakin didn't bother to lessen Luke's time with Nakari with a petty how is she? He merely waited for Luke to be seated next to him, and then he wrapped an arm about Luke's shoulders.

Luke gratefully turned into Anakin's embrace, closing his eyes and taking a shaky breath as he attached himself to Nakari's presence in the Force, monitoring it closely as if it could suddenly change and things could go downhill all at once. He leaned his head against his father's shoulder, unsure of how he felt at the moment. The best he could come up with was lost, empty, and tired. He felt like he didn't need to speak, though, and so he let the silence last, steadying his breathing and trying to find some semblance of calm again.