LOVE IS YOU

Just a series of drabbles, some longer than others, based on the Gallya relationship and prompts from my friends. They're not in any type of chronological order. Please do review! And don't hesitate to say if there's any prompts you'd like me to cover :)

CRYING

Gaby could count on one hand the amount of times she had seen Illya cry and even then it wasn't inconsolable crying it was just welling up and a few tears quickly wiped away. But on 7th July 1968 that changed.

7th July 1968 their son was born. It should have been a happy day if not for the fact he should've been born a month later than he had been.

The labor was short and Gaby was too worried about the baby to comprehend the pain. Illya had been panicking and was eventually kicked out the delivery room at request of the obstetrician after shouting at him angrily in Russian.

When the baby was born she wasn't even allowed to hold him, he had undeveloped lungs; respiratory distress syndrome and had been rushed away. He was now in a neonatal unit hooked up to a ventilator.

Despite the news she fell asleep quickly afterwards, the exhaustion took its toll on her small body. When she awoke an hour and half's nap seemed like eternity. She almost forgot where she was but the clinical setting quickly had everything rushing back to her.

She was about to jump out of bed but then she noticed the blonde sitting by her bedside. Elbows on his knees, hands steepled under his chin as he just stared at her.

"Illya, how is he?"

"Not good," he replied. His jaw clenched, fingers tapping against each other. "Stable at the moment though. The doctor said he will tell us if there is any change. Touch and go he said."

She got out of bed and held back the tears because she knew she wouldn't stop. She threw on a gown and pulled Illya up by the hand.

"You should rest."

"But I'd rather go and see our boy, I want to hold him." She forced a smile and Illya kissed her forehead before leading the way.

Turning down a few corridors he seemed to know where he was going. They stopped once they reached a room with the sign on the double glass doors reading 'Neonatal'

Looking through there were five incubators lining each side of the room. Two of them had couples peering into them. Gaby couldn't quite see how many of the incubators had babies in but Illya pointed to one on the far side of the room where a nurse in purple scrubs was standing.

"There he is."

Gaby was about to go inside when the nurse caught sight and headed over to them.

"You must be mum," the nurse said with a smile.

"Yeah." Gaby smiled politely back.

"Well now the team is together you've no excuse not to come in now and say hello, dad." This time the nurse smiled up at Illya but it wasn't returned.

Gaby was about to question Illya on what the nurse meant but he dropped her hand and just walked off.

"Sorry," the nurse said.

"No it's not your fault he's like that sometimes."

The nurse offered her a sympathetic look, "It can't be easy for either of you. We're all doing our best."

"Thank you," Gaby said, "I know you are. I should go after him."

His strides were long and fast, she nearly lost him. She managed to catch him going through a set of fire exit doors but luckily she didn't have to go far after that. He'd got up one short flight of stairs and then stopped.

His forehead was pressed against the wall and his fists clenched by his side. Gaby tenderly lay her hand on his arm.

"Don't you want to come and say hello to him with me?"

He didn't shrug her off, slowly he turned round and she realised tears were streaming from his eyes before he covered his face with his forearm.

For a moment she didn't know what to do or how to console, but she didn't have to ponder for long. His large frame engulfed her and she quickly wrapped her arms around him.

"I'm sorry, Gaby," his voice cracked in her ear as he sobbed. It was enough to make her cry but there was no way she could right now. One of them had to keep it together.

"Illya this is not your fault, you have nothing to be sorry for."

"What if baby doesn't make it, Gaby?"

"Don't think like that, look at his parents. His a fighter, of course he's going to make it." She tried to sound sure of this but she was still trying to convince herself. Illya pulled away from her not even trying to hide the fact he was still crying. He kept rubbing his red eyes on his sleeve until she dug a tissue from her pocket.

"I think you should come and see him," she said softly. Reaching up to dab the tears away from his face. He leaned into her touch looking about as exhausted as she felt.

"There's nothing I can do to help him," Illya's voice was full of self loathing. She could tell he was trying not to start crying again. "There is nothing I can do. I'm useless."

"No you're not. Like I said, he's going to get better and when he does he's going to need his father. And right now we both need you."

They stared at each other until Illya squeezed his eyes shut and sighed.

"Okay."

Gaby smiled and they walked hand in hand back to the neonatal unit. There was now a different nurse in there talking to one of the other couples.

Before Illya had a chance to second guess himself, Gaby lead them inside. She didn't look in any of the other incubators, making a beeline to the one she knew held their son.

Gaby gasped when she first laid eyes on him properly. He had a thin layer of fair hair; his eyes were still shut but she imagined them to be as blue as his fathers. Pads with wires attached covered most of his small torso, he was clad in just a nappy. He looked so calm, new to the world without a care. But she knew his breathing was being aided by the tubes coming out of his nose and mouth hooked up to the machine behind. She wondered if he felt any pain or if his brain processed this as normal.

He was so tiny and fragile but she already loved every inch of him. His little hand clenched and relaxed and she had the urge to reach through the holes in the side of the incubator and touch his fingers. She stopped herself though thinking there was probably a protocol for disinfecting her hands first.

She then became aware of Illya's presence looming over her.

"Baby is very small. Takes after you."

Gaby smiled up at him and he smiled back. "Everything is tiny compared to you." Although their son was somewhat smaller than most newborns.

"My boy," Illya said proudly. "Small but if anything like his mother then you're right, I should not doubt that he is strong enough to survive this."

Illya's newly found confidence was relief to her ears she would never admit it but as cliché as it was he was her rock. She counted on him and in this situation she wasn't sure how long she could hold it together for the both of them.

Illya's gazed was fixed on the baby in front of them. It was as if he'd never seen anything so amazing before. He pulled something out the back pocket of his trousers. At first it just looked like grey scrunched up wool but quickly realised it was a babies hat in the design of a flat cap, the type of headwear Illya loved so much.

"In case baby's head gets cold."

"Next to this little munchkin this is probably the cutest thing I've seen in a long while," said Gaby. She took the little hat and studied it there was no label and the vision of Illya knitting crossed her mind. A ludicrous thought.

"Shall we ask the if we can touch him and if perhaps you can put the hat on him?"

"I would like that."

Gaby was about to approach the nurse when Illya pulled her back.

"Baby needs a name."

"As much as I love all the wonderful suggestions you've been giving me on a daily..."

"Kai."

"Kai?"

"In Japanese it can mean recovery. Swahili; loveable and Burmese it means strong."

Gaby's eyebrows raised. It never ceased to amaze her just how many languages Illya knew.

"Kai Felix Kuryakin," said Gaby making Illya smile. Felix, the name of his father, was one choice he hadn't suggested to her. Perhaps out of embarrassment, but she knew how much it would mean to him, no matter what his father had done back in Russia it was clear he meant a lot to him.

His eyes filled up with tears again but he didn't start crying, he just inhaled deeply and smiled down at his son.

Gaby managed a smile too, she just knew that somehow everything was going to be okay.