Alfred rolls his eyes as he listens to Arthur gabber on. He wants to just end the phone call, but Matthew has control of the phone, Ludwig has already threatened him with paperwork is he "misbehaves", and Kiku is waiting patiently for Arthur to finish his story. He can tell that the Japanese man is as bored as he is though, if the drawings on his paper are anything to go by. Finally, Arthur stops talking.

"Ve vere vondering if you vould like to join us for un drink at a local pub?" Ludwig asks. Alfred notes that his accent is stronger than usual. Apparently the German had been growing impatient with the Englishman as well.

Arthur gives a hum. "I might join you later."

"That means he's not leaving the house unless it's on fire," Alfred says, smirking.

Arthur gives a squawk over the phone and tries to deny it, but Alfred just grabs the phone from Matthew's hand, who had delved into laughter the moment Arthur squawked, and says goodbye before hanging up.

~*~TwInsanity~*~

Arthur's eyebrow twitches once before he smooths his face into a smile. "Quite alright. Accidents happen."

Italy frets for a few moments, grabbing some paper towels and handing them to England as he babbles apologies. Matthew feels bad for the small nation and helps him clean up some of the spilled spaghetti. In all honesty, it had looked delicious before Arthur ended up wearing all but a spoonful.

"England, I'm so sorry! I can't believe that I'd lost my grip on the plate! I didn't mean to spill it all over your new clothes," Italy says, his eyebrows furrowing together and his mouth turned to a frown. That was probably the worst thing to see on the usually bubbly nation.

"I'll just go clean up," Arthur says. "Not to worry."

As the Englishman walks away, Italy turns to Matthew. "Does he really mean it?"

Matthew wants to comfort the nation, but figures that being honest is better. "He'll never forget it." When Italy looks like he's about to start bawling, Matthew gives a slight cringe before continuing. "He's not going to be angry at you, he'll probably just be more cautious when you're carrying food. It'll be alright."

Matthew is left attempting to calm the small Italian before Germany arrives.

~*~TwInsanity~*~

"Excuse me, sorry, is anyone sitting here?" Arthur asks.

Alfred looks from his phone to Prussia and just says, "He means that you have three seconds to move your bag before he ends you."

The Prussian huffs and moves his bag.

~*~TwInsanity~*~

Alfred, Arthur, and Matthew walk into a restaurant for lunch before they have to get to the meeting. Matthew just nods and heads to the restroom while Alfred and Arthur are seated.

"Hi! I'm Cathy, I'll be your server today," a young brunette says.

Arthur looks up and blinks. "Sorry?"

Cathy blinks in surprise and turns to Alfred, who sighs.

"He meant that his name is Arthur. I'm Alfred. We've got a third person with us, but they had to go to the restroom real quick," Alfred says.

Cathy nods. "Alright, can I get you some drinks?"

"Tea please."

"You got Coke?"

Cathy nods.

"One of those please."

Cathy makes a note on her page. "And do you know what your friend would like?"

"He'll probably like a tea as well."

Cathy gives another nod and walks off. A moment later and Matthew arrives, sliding into the seat opposite Arthur.

"I miss anything?" Matthew asks.

Alfred shrugs. "Just drink orders. Got you a tea."

Matthew nods. "That'll work. Any suggestions Arthur?"

Arthur gives a hum. "Well, the fish and chips are rather good. They also make a good cottage pie. Their Wellington is particularly good. I have to admit, I've never had any of their pasta dishes."

Cathy walks back up to the table, balancing a tray. "I've two teas and a Coke. And you must be the friend they were waiting on."

Matthew's eyebrows furrow. "Sorry?"

Cathy just looks to Alfred, who sighs again, and says, "He means his name is Matthew."

Cathy nods and takes their orders. After she's walked off. Alfred stares between Arthur and Matthew, who both seem somewhat bewildered, and just laughs.

~*~TwInsanity~*~

Matthew is chatting with Cuba when he notices Arthur running back into the building, his hair plastered to his head and his clothing dripping.

"So, how badly is it raining?" Cuba asks.

Arthur gives a scowl. "Bit wet out there."

Matthew frowns. "In other words, it's pouring cats and dogs."

Cuba huffs. "Thanks for the translation buddy."

Matthew just smirks.

~*~TwInsanity~*~

Eduardo sighs as he's leaving the meeting room. That took entirely too long. He begins to plan out what he's going to get for dinner (being in France makes things always interesting when getting food.) when he notices that said country is still sitting and is staring at his computer.

"France, the meeting is over, you don't have to stay," Eduardo says. He wants to just leave, but is well aware that Matthew (who'd left earlier with Gilbert) would want him to make sure that the other country is ok.

France looks up and blinks. "Oh, oui. Je désolé, this email from Arthur has me…puzzled."

"Want me to take a look?" Eduardo asks, somewhat hoping the other nation will say no. It's not that he wants to be rude, but honestly, he's hungry.

"If you'd like," France says. He turns the laptop to Eduardo, who walks over and reads over the text.

'Francis,

I am exceedingly grateful for receiving your input on the International Space Station Thermodynamic tracking and experimentation programme, it was quite interesting. Unfortunately, while appreciated, this was not the information which was asked from you. If it would be no trouble, I would be exceptionally grateful if you would send me the information on the International Intelligence Briefing Clause by the end of today.

Thanks,

Arthur.'

Eduardo tilts his head, rereads it again, and is about to comment when a "ding" sounds from the laptop. France just opens it and Eduardo recognizes the sender as Alfred.

'Francis,

Thank you for the information on the IIBC, it sure was something else to read. Of course, I still need to see the information you got from the Thermodynamic program from the Space Station. I really need it by the end of tonight, so if you could get it to me, I'd appreciate it.

Thanks,

Alfred.'

Eduard blinks and then turns to France. "Ok, that confirms it, you're about to piss off both England and Alfred."

France blinks. "How do you know?"

"That 'Thanks' at the end?" Eduardo points to the line in both emails. "It's not actually thanks. It's a warning. One that I'm sure Alfred learned from England. Don't. Piss. Them. Off."

With that, Eduardo turns and leaves the room.

~*~TwInsanity~*~

"Of course I'm looking forward to having you both over for dinner, is there anything you'd prefer I make?" Arthur asks.

On the outside, both Alfred and Matthew appear to think about it. Internally, they both panic a little bit. Finally, Alfred just shrugs.

"Ya know, it's a bit early to be thinkin' 'bout dinner. How 'bout we just figure that out when we get over to you?" Alfred says.

"Are you sure?" Arthur says, though he's still cringing a bit at the "butchering of his language".

Matthew nods. "Al's right. It is a bit early to be thinking about dinner."

"Very well then." Arthur looks at his watch. "Right then. I suppose I really should start thinking about possibly making a move."

Alfred and Matthew blink at each other as Arthur just turns and walks away. Alfred snorts.

"Bye then!" Alfred calls out, his voice easily carrying down the hall to the retreating Brit.

"You know, I'd forgotten that he does that," Matthew mutters.

~*~TwInsanity~*~

"So I heard that both Matthew and Alfred are getting better," Francis says, he maneuvers the phone a bit, managing to cradle it between his ear and shoulder. "How is that turning out?"

"It's fine," Arthur replies. Francis can hear shouting and laughter coming across the line. Something breaks. A cat yowls. Matthew begins swearing quite loudly in both English and French. Alfred just starts cackling.

"You sure everything is alright?" Francis asks, his eyebrows raising. There's a high pitched whining. The sound of something electrical shorting out. Multiple hard thuds. Something else breaks. Matthew begins laughing. Alfred starts swearing. More thuds. Another thing breaks.

Arthur just sighs. "Perfect."

AN/Hey all, I know it's been a while since I've updated this, but work and other such got in the way. Plus a lack of inspiration. I saw a post on Pinterest a while back on "translating" what a British person means when they say certain things(Yay humor posts!) and decided to run with some of that. These are not all of the entries, but there are quite a few of them. Anyway, let me know what you think. Thank you to everyone who has liked, subscribed, liked, sacrificed to Satan, reviewed...*rereads that* huh...that's weird, I put liked twice. Anyway, thanks a bunch!