This is an entry for The-Hetalia-Universe "April fools" 2015 contest on Devientart. (PS. I won second place with this fic)
Note that i don't speak either Chinese or Italian, so whatever i use is off of google translate. Feel free to correct me but please do it nicely, constructive criticism is welcome but NO flames!
China and Romano are two of my favourite countries in Hetalia, so i decided to write something for them cause there weren't many fanfics for them when i looked :(
Warning for Romano's Swearing, i have not filtered it.
FINAL warning- it might be a bit long, but totally worth it
Lovino didn't like it when people called his bluff, it was like an insult to his pride. If there was one thing you NEVER insulted, it was Lovino's italian pride.
And it was april fools day. He smirked at all the pranks he could pull on his chosen victim. It was all that stupid Hamburger bastard's fault that this was happening…
***FLASHBACK***
"Why are we here you git?" A grumpy Arthur asked, sitting on the nearest chair with a huff.
"We're all in my house because…" Alfred replied, "Were going to celebrate April Fool's Day!"
"Ve~ what do you mean Alfie?" Feliciano asked.
Feliciano was the ONLY reason Lovino was there, he needed a ride here because the stupid potato sucker's brother had dragged him here earlier.
It was most definitely not because he secretly wanted to see a certain Chinese boy… nope, not at all!
The boy in question was seated on the end of the couch on the opposite side of the room, customary side ponytail and Lovino wondered if it was a silky as it looks-
'No! Don't think about that!' he scolded himself. As a last resort he payed attention to what the Hamburger bastard was saying.
"-and this'll be the best April Fool's event ever!"
Well, too late for that then. Lovino's scowl deepened as he realised he now had no idea what was going on, when a top hat with bits of paper was pushed in front of his face.
"The fuck is this?" He demanded. Alfred answered before Feliciano could get a word in.
"I just finished explaining Lovino! Were going to pick a name out of a hat, and whoever you pick the two of you have to work together to prank someone within the week."
Lovino huffed in annoyance. "Why should i do this you moron? I'm only here cause my idiot brother wouldn't stop whining."
Alfred grinned wider. "What? You can't prank worth a damn can you?"
He shot a dark glare at the American. "Are you calling my bluff you bastard?"
"Soooo…. can you not prank or what?"
"FINE! One question, bastard."
"What is it Lovino?"
"How do we pick who the fuck were supposed to prank?"
"….. uhhh…"
Arthur snorted. "See? All the fat from your stupid hamburgers has weighed down your brain, wanker."
"HEY! The hero has thought of a totally heroic idea!"
Francis (Arthur had made sure to sit far away from him) cleared his throat pointedly.
"Ohohohon~ This should be good mon amis"
"You will have to pick a second name!" Alfred exclaimed, ignoring Francis. "This name is the name of the person you prank, and you keep the paper with the name on it without showing or telling anyone except your partner."
Lovino (While glaring at Alfred) pulled the name out that was his partner, he didn't know wether to be happy or be horrified.
Yao Wang.
On the outside he had the perfect poker face, a totally unreadable expression. Inside, however, he decided he was very happy about this. The perfect chance to hang out with Yao. He stashed the little paper in his pocket and reached his hand in for the second one, the victim, yes victim, that he would prank.
Alfred F. Jones
Oh, he almost wanted to laugh at the irony. The stupid American didn't know what he just got into, so he wanted to call Lovino's bluff?
Let the games begin.
*** END FLASHBACK***
So now here he was a day later, waiting in his living room for his cru- friend (founded by mutual love of cooking in their first year of high school) to arrive, so they could discuss prank ideas. He couldn't believe he was going along with it, but then again, he couldn't believe that Yao was either.
And Yao had agreed to come to his house. Lovino was trying not to panic and not run around cleaning like that damn potato bastard. He jumped when he heard the doorbell, and would never admit that he ran to the door. Sure enough, there he was, Yao had arrived at last.
"Ciao Yao, how have you been since… well last night i guess?" He asked, cracking a small smirk. Then he noticed something that was sure to distract him.
Dear god did Yao look good.
YAO'S POV (Flashback to hat picking)
The only one who knew how i felt was Feliciano. I don't know when it started aru, but i knew for some reason i had a crush on Lovino Vargas. When i saw him enter Alfred's house, i tried not to look at him because i knew my cheeks would flare a deeper red then the blood red shirt i was wearing today. When i did, i noticed he looked out of it, like he was deep in thought about something.
After he picked the first name out of the hat, anyone else would see a very good poker face, but i saw something in his eyes, they looked… happy?
'Did he get Antonio?' i thought, 'everyone but Lovino himself knows that he's been trying to get closer to him, or did he? Ughh, i don't know!'
The second name, his eyes still looked happy, but they a subtle shade darker. I knew if his emotions were showing that it would be an evil smirk. That didn't look good for whoever his 'victim' was, I've known him long enough to guess that.
**AFTER YAO LEAVES AMERICA'S HOUSE**
Since the names had been chosen for the week, everyone left. I was one of the last to leave, but just as i was leaving in my car i heard someone talk from my backseat.
"About time those bastardos left si?"
"AIYAH!" I exclaimed, turning around to punch the intruder (not registering the use of italian) but my fist was caught.
When i finally realised who it was, i could have just died of embarrassment right there. It was Lovino.
"Um, Ni Hao Lovi…" Great now i sound like an idiot… (but it seemed i was the only one who ever called him that and got away without getting yelled at.) I could guess what he was here for, but i wouldn't mind just talking to him a little bit longer.
"Guess what Yao? Were-a partners for this weeks prank."
What? no, no, no. Tell me this isn't happening.
"You don't-a mind do you?"
'Yes! if i do this i might say something stupid!'
"No, i don't mind aru."
'Why did i say that?!'
He handed me a piece of paper with his address on it, and before i could speak he was outside of the drivers window with a small smirk on his face.
"We can talk about the prank tomorrow if you want, si?"
I sat there in my drivers seat grinning like an idiot, until i started driving away did i realise the situation. I was going to Lovino's house, with just the two of us. When i got home i didn't even hear my brother Kiku question why i was smiling.
Tomorrow was going to be either the best or worst day of my life. Here's hoping…
***TIME SKIP (No-One's POV)***
After quick hellos and pleasantries (during which both tried not to stare at the other lest their feeling be noticed) they sat down at Lovino's dining table to discuss prank ideas. They were both using their laptops next to each other on the table, whenever they found one they liked they showed it to the other and discussed wether or not they would carry it out. Lovino and Yao both wanted to do more then one prank, since they had a week why not?
"Yao?"
"Yes Lovino?"
"I found a GOOD one."
"Let me see, aru."
Yao looked over at Lovino's laptop screen, and quite agreed with the one he picked out.
"Lovino?" He grinned.
"Si Yao?"
"Alfred's in for a nasty surprise…"
Yao and Lovino's grins were identically wide.
*** TIME SKIP (To America's house)***
America had gone out for the day, presumably to go bug Arthur about something or stuff his face with his weight in McDonalds. Lovino had picked the lock to the back door and allowed them both entrance, both were carrying packages in their arms, and Lovino put his down on the kitchen counter before going back to shut the door they came through.
"Yao?" Lovino asked, seeing no Yao in the kitchen and his package on the counter beside his own.
He found the Chinese boy in the lounge room, staring at a painting on the opposite wall with a far-off look in his eyes.
"…It's beautiful, aru"
"Si, tu sei la cosa più bella che abbia mai visto." Lovino said in a quiet voice, but apparently Yao still heard it.
"What did you say, Lovino?"
Lovino's eyes widened, once he realised what he just said. He thanked every god he knew right now that Yao didn't understand Italian.
"Uhhh… nothing important!" He exclaimed, his face red. "Let's get on with the prank." Without another word Lovino rushed back to the kitchen to open the package he brought. Yao followed him, confused and mildly curious as to what he could have possibly said to make his face that red.
Lovino opened his box, which contained bottles of lemonade. Then Yao (who was still confused) opened his box, which was full of bottles of soy sauce.
Then Lovino walked over to the fridge and opened it, neither of them were surprised to see lots of coke bottles inside. Typical Alfred, then again thats why they chose this particular prank.
One by one, both of them emptied all the coke down the sink, occasionally having a drink ("If the bastard isn't going to drink this, why waste it?") but eventually all the bottles of coke in the fridge had been emptied. Then their plan set into motion.
They filled half of each coke bottle with lemonade, then the other half with soy sauce so that the liquid in the bottle was a dark brown, but because of the lemonade it was fizzy. All in all it looked just like coke, but it wasn't. This was done to each of the empty coke bottles until all of them had been closed and replaced in the fridge.
"Hehe, that hamburger bastard thinks he can call my bluff? We'll see Alfred, we'll see…"
"Lovino…?" Yao asked. Lovino jumped, startled.
"Yes?"
"Your face looks creepy, did you take lessons from Ivan?"
"WHAT? No!"
"Let's go outside then shall we?"
Yao and Lovino went outside and climbed to the lower branches of a tree with a view in Alfred's kitchen, they were just high enough to not be seen and record the American's reaction. (Yao was holding the camera)
Soon enough, Alfred came home, predictably with a bag of MacDonalds in his hand. He ran to the kitchen and sat down to eat, then paused and looked up.
"Hey wait, i need my coke!"
Alfred bounded over to the fridge and opened it, seeing the many bottles of 'coke'. He grabbed one and without thinking and started chugging it, it only took a few seconds for the reaction to take place.
"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH! OHMYGOD ITS POISONED! NOOOOOOOOO MY BELOVED COKE A VILLAIN HAS POISONED YOU!"
Alfred then proceeded to run around his kitchen during his 'outburst' flailing and looking not to far from crying.
It took all the duo's willpower to not fall out of the tree laughing their asses off, though they exchanged smug looks.
LOVINO'S POV
'Dammit Yao! Why are you so good looking?!'
i was stuck in the tree with him, me a little higher then he was. He was torturing me without even knowing, then i heard Alfred's outburst. That bastard was being so overdramatic it was hilarious, I'm definitely going to send this to Elizibeta later.
I was so zoned out and distracted, i didn't even realise i was staring at Yao below me, who was giving me a confused look while still holding the camera in place. I felt my face turn red as i hurriedly turned my head away.
YAO's POV
'Why was he staring at me?'
I was confused, what did he find so interesting? He must have realised i was looking at him because his face turned red as the tomatoes he loved so much, and turned away.
I turned around and kept recording Alfred's reaction. He was still flailing around, this time he was on the phone.
"THE VILLAINS HAVE INVADED THE HEROES HOUSE! THEY EVILLY REPLACED MY COKE WITH SOME KIND OF HORRIBLE FAKE! NOOOOOOOO NOT THE COKE! COKE IS THE MOST HEROIC DRINK EVER MADE- WHAT AM I GOING TO DOOOOOOO? NOOOOOOOOOOO!"
This was to funny! A better reaction then i expected, he seriously thought villains had invaded his house? He either didn't think he would be pranked, or forgot about his OWN event.
Now Alfred had locked himself in his living room, huddling under a blanket on the couch. After a good few minutes of mumbling to himself, he leapt of the ouch and ran out the front door.
"THE HERO WILL GO SAVE THE COKE FROM THIS HORRIBLE VILLAINY! FREEEEEEEEEEEDOM!"
NO-ONE's POV
With that, he ran down the street, yelling about freedom, coke, and villainy. After that was done, the both of them were still in the tree, they barely stopped the recording before they bursted out laughing.
When all the tears that had been shed from laughing so hard were dried, Lovino decided it was time to climb down from the tree they were in. It was when Yao started to climb down that there was a problem.
"My shoe is stuck Lovino!" Yao called. Sure enough, his left foot had been caught in the tree, and he was trying to pull it free with no success. Said Italian was under the tree, waiting to catch him if he fell, and he really hoped Yao didn't.
Eventually, Yao got frustrated with being stuck, and used a lot of effort in one final tug. Unfortunately, he tugged himself to far forward, and was unable to stop his own momentum as he fell forward.
"AIYAH!" He shouted as he fell, sending Lovino into a massive silent panic.
"YAO!" He exclaimed, arms outstretched.
CRASH! both boys fell to the ground in a mess of tangled limbs. When both were able to separate, Lovino was slightly leaning over Yao.
"Are you-a okay Yao?" Lovino asked, staring down into the other's eyes. Neither realised it but they were both leaning closer to each others faces.
"Lovi-"
Finally they kissed, both wishing they had done this a lot sooner. Sure it wasn't the most romantic setting for a first kiss, but they didn't care at that moment.
"Ti Amo Yao."
"Wo ai ni Lovino."
Finally Lovino stood up, never letting go of Yao's hand as the Chinese boy stood up.
"Would you-a like to go do something with me Yao?" Lovino asked, face flushing a deep red.
"Shi, i would love that. Where are we going?"
Lovino smirked.
"That, amore, is a surprise."
Hand intertwined together, they walked away from Alfred's house, and down to Lovino's car, where they would both spend the day in each other's company.
It wasn't until halfway there that Yao noticed he was missing a shoe.
***EXTENDED ENDING***
Alfred arrived back at his driveway, smiling and seemingly calm about today's events. When he passed the tree in his front yard, he noticed a singular shoe hanging from the bark. Not knowing Yao and Lovino were there earlier, his over-active imagination went into overdrive.
He then ran inside shrieking.
"AAAAHHHHHH OMIGOD IT'S A GHOST! SOMEONE DIED IN MY TREE! NOOOOOOOO I DON'T WANNA DIEEEEEEE!"
Hope you liked my story, and happy April Fools Day! :)