RWBY: The Parody

By: Maniac92

Chapter 23: The Indecent Intervention

In one day, Beacon's ballroom had been transformed. Balloons, ribbons, and decorative lights had been set up throughout the room, while dozens of tables and chairs were placed against the walls. The floor had been polished and the room had been meticulously cleaned, making it look better than it had in years.

Ruby was sitting alone at a table, a frown on her face. She was deep in thought about-

Weiss suddenly slammed her hands on the table, making Ruby jump. "I need your help!" said Weiss. She held out two white cards and said, "Which color would make a better tablecloth?"

Ruby looked at the cards in confusion. "Aren't they the same color?"

Weiss sighed and said, "No! One is clearly Ghost White while the other is clearly White Smoke. They're completely different."

"Oh…I see?" Ruby answered unconvincingly. She looked at the cards again before pointing to the one on the right. "That one. Choose the White Smoke."

"That's the Ghost White," said Weiss.

"Oh!" said Ruby. She pointed to the other one. "Then how about the Ghost White?"

"That's the White Smoke!" yelled Weiss. She sighed and pocketed the cards. "Ruby, have you even done anything like this before?"

"No," answered Ruby as she shook her head.

Weiss blinked. "Oh." She paused for a second as she looked around the ballroom. "Let's see…balloons are done…the caterers have been hired…the napkins have been pressed…" She spotted Yang bringing in a massive speaker and smiled. "I've got it! How about you help Yang pick the music for the dance?"

Ruby shrugged. "I guess I could help with that."

"Good," Weiss said with a smile. She frowned and added, "Make sure that she picks appropriate songs to play. I've had to stop her from adding three different songs about girls' asses already and I can't keep watching her."

"You just don't know what good music is," Yang called as she set down the speaker.

"No," replied Weiss, giving Yang a glare, "I just realize that we're trying to organize a dance. Not an orgy."

"My songs are fine!" said Yang. She pulled out her Scroll. "Here, I'll set my playlist to shuffle and show you." She pressed a button on her Scroll and waited.

"Let's talk about sex, baby, let's talk about you and me.

Let's talk about bubbles in the tub, let's talk about making love!" sang the music playing from the Scroll's speaker.

Yang quickly hit the pause button and smiled innocently at Weiss and Ruby. "Oops?" she offered.

Ruby looked back at Weiss and promised, "Yeah, I'll go over the playlist once she's done."

Weiss let out a sigh of relief and replied, "Thank you." She pulled out her own Scroll and said, "Now if you'll excuse me, I need to talk to a man about some floral arrangements." Weiss walked away, tapping in a number on her Scroll.

Yang walked over to Ruby's table. "So," she said, "picked a dress for the dance yet?"

"What's the point?" asked Ruby. "Blake doesn't want to come, so who cares?"

Yang paused and gave Ruby a searching look. "Did…did you want to go with her to the dance?" she asked seriously.

Ruby blushed and waved her hands in denial. "N-no!" she stammered. "I just want her to relax at the dance is all!"

"Ok. But I would support you if you did want to take Blake, you know," continued Yang. "It would be fine. Plus, I would totally get it. Blake does have that sexy aloof ninja thing going on."

"Yang!" whined Ruby, pulling her hood up to hide her red face.

Yang smiled and reached out to pull Ruby's hood away. "Don't worry about Blake. I've got a plan to get her to come to the dance."

"Please tell me you aren't going to kidnap her and force her to go to the dance," said Weiss as she walked back to the table.

Yang stared Weiss for a second. "…I have another plan to get Blake to come to the dance," she amended.

Weiss sighed and said, "I'd be worried about this, but I'm too busy dealing with the dance. I still have to get the doilies, the fog machines, approve the music list, make sure the flowers get here on time…" She paused and rubbed her temples. "Who knew setting up a dance could be so-"

The door to the ballroom opened. Sun and Neptune walked into the room and looked around in wonder. As Sun whistled appreciatively, Neptune smiled at Weiss and asked, "How are our favorite party planners doing?"

"-Wonderful!" said Weiss. "Who knew setting up a dance could be so wonderful!" She turned to Neptune and said cheerfully, "It's wonderful! We're wonderful! Everything's wonderful!"

"Cool," said Neptune, giving her a wink.

Weiss blushed and let out a blissful sigh.

"Yeah, whatever," said Sun, pushing Neptune to the side. He grinned at the girls and asked, "You ladies excited to play dress-up?"

Yang smirked and said, "Almost as excited as we are to see you in a tux, Sun."

Sun scoffed and said, "Me? In one of those monkey suits? No, thank you." He gestured down at his open shirt and jeans. "What's wrong with what I have on now?"

"You can't dress like that at a dance, Sun," said Neptune.

"Why not?" asked Sun. "I'm a Vacuo boy born and raised. It's not exactly a shirt and tie sort of place." He paused for a second. "Hell, even pants were optional most days."

Neptune sighed and said, "Trust me, I remember how long it took to convince you that it wasn't a good idea to go to class in just your underwear."

"At least I wore the underwear," Sun replied.

"And that alone took a week," retorted Neptune.

Sun shrugged and replied, "You Mistralians are weird." He turned to the girls and rubbed the back of his head. "So…how's Blake doing? Is she still…you know…"

"Grumpy?" supplied Weiss.

"Smelly?" offered Ruby.

"The same?" clarified Sun.

"Unfortunately," said Ruby. She sighed and said, "How are we supposed to convince her to relax?"

"I told you guys," said Yang. She smiled deviously. "Leave Blake to me. She will be at the dance tomorrow."

"What are you going to do?" asked Sun.

Yang gave him a wink and started walking towards the door. "Don't worry," she called. "I can be very persuasive."

Neptune watched her leave and then turned to the others. "Should we be worried?"

Weiss waved her hand dismissively. "No. Yang's smarter than she lets on. She'll handle this with grace and tact."

Ruby gave her an odd look. "Have you even met my sister?" she asked.

Minutes later:

Blake dove behind another bookcase as a fireball rocketed past her. She looked around at the burning library and grabbed Gambol Shroud off her back. "What is even happening?" she whispered to herself.

"Blaaaaakeyyyyy…" sang a demonic sounding voice from above. Blake looked up and saw a familiar blonde-haired, red-eyed girl grinning madly down at her from the top of the bookcase. She raised her fists and cocked the golden gauntlets on her wrists. "We need to talk."

Blake's eyes went wide as Yang dove off the bookcase, fire trailing after her. "Oh, fuck."

Meanwhile, with the handsome men:

Ren sighed as the hot water poured from the shower head onto his stiff shoulders. Droplets trailed down his pale, lean body, pooling at his feet. His hair was undone from the ponytail he normally wore; his raven locks cascading down his face and bare back. He tilted his head back slightly and brushed the hair away from his handsome face. His magenta irises focused on the shower wall and he stood motionless; lost in thought.

"Ren," said a voice, stirring him from his thoughts.

Ren turned his head slightly to look at his visitor. Jaune was standing under the adjacent shower, staring intently at Ren with his ocean-like blue eyes. "Can we talk for a minute?" Jaune breathed, almost desperately. "I don't know how much longer I can hold this in."

Ren noted, rather uncomfortably, that Jaune was also completely naked. He took the moment to take in the results of Pyrrha's training as he stared at Jaune's surprisingly toned body. While Jaune wasn't dark, his muscles had a healthy tan that Ren lacked. Dark bruises stood out on his side and chest; souvenirs from training that his Aura had not fully healed yet. Ren's gaze trailed down Jaune's abs to his-

Ren blinked as he realized he had been staring. He quickly looked back up into Jaune's eyes and asked, "What do you need?"

"You," said Jaune simply, taking a step forward. He paused and said, "But not here. Can you come back to the dorm with me once we're done with our showers?"

Ren nodded. "Anything for you, my friend." He turned back to his own running showerhead. After a moment, he looked back. "Jaune?"

Jaune looked up from the soapy lather he was spreading on his chest. "Yes Ren?" he answered.

Ren nodded at him and said, "Nice."

Jaune gave him a roguish wink. "Back at you, man."

One steamy shower later:

Jaune and Ren were wrapped in towels and sitting on Ren's bed back in JNPR's dorm. The cool air chilled their damp bodies as they sat side-by-side, Ren's pink eyes staring deeply into Jaune's blue ones.

"Ren," breathed Jaune. "You are one of my best friends…hell, I consider you to be the brother I never had. But despite that, I…I just don't know where to start…"

Ren smiled gently and laid a hand on Jaune's bare knee. "Start from the beginning," he advised.

Jaune sighed and ran a hand through his wet, golden hair. "I just don't want to weird you out or anything, you know? I…well, I care about you too much to do that."

"Jaune." Ren squeezed Jaune's knee reassuringly. "I can take it. I promise."

Jaune looked at Ren, taking in his concerned face. "Are you sure?" he asked.

"I am," nodded Ren. "Give it to me."

Heavy breathing came from the bed next to them. "Oh god, please give it to him…" moaned a breathless voice.

Jaune and Ren turned their heads to look at Nora, who was sitting in on her bed staring at them with a blush on her face. She was dressed in her pajamas: a slightly too-large black shirt with the word 'CATCHPHRASE" adorned on it and small pink shorts decorated with tiny lightning bolts. Pink headphones were around her neck and an unopened book rested on her bare thighs.

"Nora, do you mind?" asked Jaune, gesturing to himself and Ren. "We're trying to have a private conversation here."

Nora blinked as the blush on her cheeks faded. "Conversation?" she repeated.

Ren nodded and turned back to Jaune. "It's alright, Jaune. Tell me about your girl trouble."

"Girl trouble?!" repeated Nora. She scoffed and pulled her headphones back over her head. "I thought this was going in a much sexier direction…" she grumbled to herself as she opened her book.

Jaune sighed and fell silent for a few moments. "…It's Weiss," he finally admitted. He leaned his head back and closed his eyes. "God, she's great. Smart, talented, confident…not to mention beautiful." He sighed again and said, "No wonder she won't give somebody like me a chance…she's miles out of my league."

"Do you…really like her that much?" asked Ren.

"I…well, I really don't know," said Jaune. He opened his eyes and stared at the ceiling. "It's…complicated. It's like a part of me realizes that she doesn't really like me, but another part doesn't want me to stop trying." He sighed again. "All I want is a chance. A chance to be the guy that she likes without screwing everything up again. Is that really so bad?"

"Then do it," said a voice from the door.

Jaune, Ren, and Nora looked over to see Pyrrha enter the room. She shut the door behind her and stared at Jaune. "If you really want to have a chance with Weiss, then you need to make a serious effort. She's not just going to randomly fall into your arms, Jaune." She knelt down and looked Jaune in the eye. "No schemes. No music. You need to tell Weiss how you feel and ask for that chance."

"But…but what if she says 'no'?" asked Jaune, looking down at the floor.

Pyrrha shrugged. "Then she says 'no'. It's her decision. It will hurt if she rejects you, but you can move past it." She gestured to Ren and Nora and said, "Your team…I…will be here to help you heal. To help you realize that it is not the end of the world and that you can move on. But Jaune…" She took hold of Jaune's chin and gently lifted his head to stare into his eyes. "Your best bet is to just be honest about your feelings."

"…What if she hates me?" asked Jaune quietly. "What if she wants nothing to do with me afterwards?"

"Then she's a fool," answered Pyrrha, smiling down at him, "because you are one hell of a guy."

Jaune tried to speak, but something felt lodged in his throat. He looked away and rubbed his suddenly-watery eyes. He stood up and wrapped his arms around Pyrrha, pulling her close. He leaned in and gave her a kiss on the cheek. "Thanks Pyrrha," he whispered.

Pyrrha smiled as she leaned into the embrace and nestled her head into the crook of Jaune's neck. "My pleasure, partner," she said back. She pulled back from the embrace and nodded at Jaune. "Are you ready?"

Jaune gave her a smile and nodded. "I'm ready," he affirmed. He raised his hands to the sky and yelled, "I'm ready to bear it all to Weiss!"

Jaune's towel, free from his grasp, promptly dropped to the floor.

Pyrrha's face went scarlet as her gaze immediately went downwards. "J-Jaune, your-!"

"It feels so good to talk to you about this sort of thing, Pyrrha," continued Jaune, unware of his nudity. He touched his bare chest and said, "It feels so freeing; putting it all out there like this. Really letting it all hang out there."

"Jaune-" began Ren, whose palm was pressed against his face.

"God, I can't wait to tell Weiss how I feel about her, you know?" Jaune continued. "I think it's about time I showed her what I was made of. Showed her that Jaune David Arc is a man!"

"I'll say!" agreed Nora as she openly stared.

"I'm going to tell Weiss how I feel right now!" said Jaune. He turned his back to Pyrrha, causing her to bite her lip as she glanced downward again, and headed for the door. "I feel great! My losing streak with Weiss is finally over!"

"Now you're about to start a whole new streak!" chimed in Nora.

Jaune turned and gave her a wink as he grabbed the doorknob. "You better believe it! No ifs, ands, or buts about it!" He left the room, shutting the door behind him.

Ren sighed as he removed the hand from his face. "…We should probably go tell him, right?"

"Nah," said Nora, waving her hand dismissively. "He'll figure it out eventually." Her grin disappeared as she turned to Pyrrha, a worried expression on her face. "But what about you? Are you really alright with this? With Jaune and Weiss?"

Pyrrha shook her head as she tore her gaze away from the door. She looked over at Nora and said, "As long as Jaune is happy, I'm fine."

"What about your happiness?" asked Nora.

Pyrrha gave her a small smile and said, "I'll be fine. Really." She reached down and picked up Jaune's forgotten towel. She frowned suddenly and said, "But if Weiss doesn't treat that beautiful, clueless man right, I will break her over my knee." Towel in hand, Pyrrha walked towards the door and exited the room.

Ren sighed and stood up, his own towel tight in his grasp. "Well," he began, "I supposed I should go back to the showers and get dressed."

"Or you could just change here," said Nora innocently. When Ren turned to stare at her, she blushed and continued, "I mean…why bother going all the way back to the bathroom when you could just get nak…I mean, change here, right?!" She laughed uncomfortably for much too long. She fell silent as she and Ren stared at each other. "Take it off," she demanded suddenly. "Now."

"Oh!" said Ren. He smiled and said, "You must mean that, since we grew up together, it wouldn't be strange to change in front of you right? I mean, we do shower together, after all." He paused. "Well, not together-together, but-"

"Yeah…sure. Whatever," panted Nora, a hungry look in her eyes as she stared at Ren's covered waist. "Take that fucking towel off before I rip it off with my teeth."

Meanwhile:

The door to the empty classroom was suddenly kicked open. Yang strolled in with Blake, who was bound and gagged with Gambol Shroud's ribbon, over her shoulder. Yang dropped Blake onto the floor in front of the professor's desk and untied the ribbon.

Once she was free, Blake stood up and spat the ribbon out of her mouth. "What the hell is this?!" she screamed.

"We need to talk about you and this investigation," said Yang as she moved in-between Blake and the door.

"I don't need to do anything," growled Blake. She began pushing past Yang. "This is a complete waste of my-"

Yang suddenly grabbed Blake's collar and pulled, slamming her forehead into Blake's.

Blake crumpled to the floor as her head erupted with pain. After a moment, she propped herself up and started blinking the stars out of her eyes. "Did…did you just headbutt me?" she asked.

"Sure did," said Yang. She reached out a hand and said, "Do you want to talk now, or do you still want to be an asshole?"

Blake stared at Yang's hand for a moment before hesitantly grabbing it. Yang pulled her back to her feet and stepped backwards, waiting for her to speak.

"I'm not going to stop," Blake finally spoke after a moment of silence. "Torchwick is out there with the White Fang and-"

"Nobody is telling you to stop," interrupted Yang. She moved out away from the door and walked over to the desk. Leaning on it, she turned to Blake and said, "We just want you to slow down for minute."

Blake eyed the now-unguarded exit fleetingly, but quickly looked back at Yang. "We…I can't slow down."

"You have to," Yang said. She gestured at Blake. "Just look at yourself! You can barely stand on your own two feet!" She sniffed the air and grimaced. "And you smell even worse than you did yesterday."

"Enough about how I smell!" yelled Blake. "Torchwick has to be stopped!"

"Which we are going to do," said Yang. "But first, a story!"

Blake stared at her. "…What?"

"It all started a long time ago…"

Blake snapped her fingers in Yang's face. "Hey, hello? I'm not listening to some…"

"A long, long, time ago!" Yang continued, ignoring Blake's protests. "Ruby and I grew up on an island called Patch. Our parents are Huntsmen. While Dad taught at Signal, our mom, Summer Rose, would take on missions for the kingdom." She smiled sadly. "Summer was the best. She listened to whatever me and Ruby had to say like it was the most interesting thing she'd ever heard. She loved us and we loved her."

Years ago:

A woman in a white cloak was sitting on a rocking chair, gently cradling a small toddler with black and red hair in her arms. The toddler was wearing black pajamas with little cartoon Beowolves decorated on them.

"Mommy!" shouted a voice. A little girl with blonde pigtails came running into the room. She was wearing a yellow shirt and orange overalls. She smiled at the woman and said, "I know what I wanna be when I grow up!"

"Really?" asked Summer Rose, smiling at the girl. "What is it, Yang?"

Yang threw some punches and answered, "I'm going to be a Huntress and beat up all the boys!"

Summer smiled as baby Ruby babbled excitedly at her older sister. "You'd be just like me! Even the beating up boys part! That's how I met your daddy and uncle!" She leaned in and whispered to Yang, "I still beat them up every now and again."

"I almost had you the last time we sparred," said a stubbly blond man as he entered the room. He picked up Yang and put her on his shoulders.

Summer smiled warmly at him as she cupped a fist in her hand. As she slowly cracked her knuckles, she asked, "What did you say, Tai?"

Taiyang Xiao Long paled as he took a step backwards from his beautiful albeit terrifying wife. "Uh…nothing dear."

Now:

Blake stared at Yang. "She seems…nice?" she offered.

"Yeah, she was," agreed Yang. The smile on her face disappeared and she fell silent for a moment. "And…one day…she left to go on a mission and…never came back. The Huntsmen who told my dad said that the last time anyone saw Summer, she was being swarmed by Grimm." Yang paused to rub her eyes. "They didn't even find a body for us to bury…"

Blake stared at Yang with horror. "Yang…I…I'm so-"

"I'm fine," said Yang. She smiled at Blake, who noticed that her eyes were watery in spite of her claims. "It happened years ago, Blake. It was tough to move on…for Ruby especially. She was too little to understand why her mom suddenly wasn't there anymore. Dad just…shut down." She paused. "Ruby and I…we're only half-sisters. I never knew Summer wasn't my actual mother until after she was gone…and I only figured out because I overheard my dad and uncle arguing one night."

"And…your real mother?" asked Blake.

"She and my dad were on a team with Summer and our uncle, Qrow," explained Yang. "She and my dad got together and she left when I was born. Nobody has seen her since." She sighed. "I was little. I thought that, if Summer was gone, maybe I could find my actual mother and bring her back home. Then Dad would be happy and Ruby could still have a mom around. So I waited for my Dad to leave the house and left with Ruby to go find her. I figured out that my dad and my mother used to live miles away from where we lived with Summer. I thought that, maybe, she'd still be there. Or I could find out where she went."

"Did you find anything?" asked Blake.

Yang nodded. "I found the house…and a whole bunch of Grimm inside. They leapt out at me and Ruby." She shuddered and held her arms. "I…I almost got us killed. If our uncle hadn't turned up in the nick of time, we would have been dead for sure."

Then:

Qrow Branwen swayed on the spot as he watched the last Beowolf fall in two pieces. He sheathed the sword on his back and turned to face a much younger Yang, who was shaking. He pointed an unsteady finger at Yang and said, "What the hell are you doing out here, squirt? Those Grimm could've eaten you and your sister for dinner if I hadn't showed up!"

Little Yang sniffed, tears dripping down her face. "I…I'm sorry!" she sobbed. "I-I just wanted to find my mom!"

"Huh?" asked Qrow. He turned and squinted at the abandoned house behind him. "Oh!" His eyes widened as he finally recognized the place. "Oh…you, uh…you found out, huh?"

Yang nodded as she stared at the ground. "I just…I wanted her to come home…I didn't w-want Ruby to get ea…eat…" Her voice broke as she started bawling.

Qrow rubbed the back of his neck as he watched the crying girl. "Aw shit…" he muttered. He stepped forward and scooped Yang into his arms. "It's alright, kiddo. Me and your dad will explain everything to you when we get back home, ok?" He felt Yang nod as she pressed her soaked face into his neck. He walked towards the little red wagon that Yang had been holding and looked inside.

A happy little face with big, silver eyes smiled up at him from the red cape it was bundled up in. "Uncle Qrow!" squealed the toddler, reaching her arms out for him. "Did you kill the monsters!"

"Yep," said Qrow as he reached down to ruffle the tiny girl's hair. "Did you miss me?"

"Nope!" answered Ruby, giggling as she pushed his hand away.

Qrow reached down and grabbed the handle of the wagon. "Let's get the hell back home," he said to the two girls. He pulled the wagon down the forest path, leaving the empty building behind them.

Now:

Blake looked at the chalkboard and then back to Yang. "Are you…are you drawing cartoons of your story?"

Yang dropped the chalk and quickly stepped away from a half-finished doodle of a disheveled man holding a flask. "Uh…no?"

Blake sighed and said, "Look, I get what you're trying to say, but this is different. I'm not a defenseless little girl looking for answers. I'm not going to back down just because-"

"You'd think that with four ears you could listen a little better," Yang interrupted. "I'm not telling you to stop, remember? I haven't! Why do you guys think I go to clubs and beat the shit out of everyone?!"

"Because you like to fight and want a decent soundtrack while doing so?" guessed Blake.

"My god, do I!" agreed Yang. "But it's also to figure out where my mom went! I'm not dumb enough to think that she'd come back to live with me and Dad, but…" She sighed and turned to face the chalkboard. "I just want to know why she left. Why she didn't seem to care about my dad…or me. But I don't let my search control me." She paused. "You and I are both looking for answers, Blake. But if we let our search become an obsession, it will destroy us."

"No, it won't!" yelled Blake. "For god's sake, why do none of you understand this? Every second that we waste is another that Torchwick is closer to his goal. It's another trusting, naïve Faunus that decides they've had enough and joins the White Fang. It's more people hurt, more people dead, and if I have to stop them alone then you better fucking believe that I will!"

"Do you actually think you could?!" Yang yelled back. She turned away from the chalkboard and glared at Blake. "If Roman Torchwick were here in this classroom, what would you do?"

"Fight him!" answered Blake.

"Good." Yang walked away from the desk and grabbed Gambol Shroud from the floor. She tossed it to Blake and said, "Pretend that I'm Torchwick. Try and fight me."

Blake looked down at the weapon in her hands. "Yang, don't be stupid," she said, looking back up. "I'm not going to-"

Yang shot forward, socking Blake in the jaw with her fist. As Blake spun in place and dropped to the floor, she cracked her knuckles and said, "You better. Because you won't convince me that you can beat anybody, let alone Roman Torchwick, if you don't."

Blake growled and picked herself up from the floor. She swung Gambol Shroud wildly, but Yang simply stepped backwards to avoid it. Blake screamed in anger and lunged towards, but Yang moved to the side and held out her foot. Blake stumbled over it and landed in a heap on the floor.

"Wow," said Yang. She started clapping slowly. "Pretty impressive."

"SHUT UP!" Blake changed Gambol Shroud to its chain-scythe mode and launched it at Yang. Yang reached out a hand and grabbed the blade before it could strike her. She yanked on the ribbon, pulling Blake towards her. She grabbed Blake by the neck and slammed her into the ground. Grabbing her wrists, Yang sat down on top of Blake, pinning her to the floor.

"For the record," said Yang, shifting her hips to get comfy, "That was me holding back. Like, a lot." She leaned forward, her chest squished against Blake's. "So, how do you feel?"

"Like I got the shit beaten out of me," replied Blake.

"Good," answered Yang. "Now imagine what Torchwick would've done to you."

Blake was silent for a moment as she imagined what Roman Torchwick, ruthless and fashionable criminal, would have done in the fight. She groaned. "I would be dead, right?"

"Bingo," answered Yang. She let go of Blake's wrists and wrapped her arms around her. "I'll say it again, so try and listen this time. No one wants you to stop trying. We just don't want you to kill yourself over this. So can you please rest? For the people who care about you?"

Blake sighed and closed her eyes. "You're not going to move until I say 'yes', are you?"

"Nope," Yang answered with a smile.

Blake opened her eyes and gave her a small smile in return. "Then it's pretty lucky for me that I see your point. I will try and relax a little." She sniffed the air and gagged. "And I'll take a shower as soon as possible."

"Good," said Yang. "And…you don't have to go if you don't want to, but if you do decide to go to the dance tomorrow, I'll save you a dance."

Blake smirked at her. "With the way you're holding me, I'd say we're well past the dancing stage of our relationship."

Yang grinned back at her. "I don't hear you complaining."

"Well," began Blake, "it feels nice. And," she fluttered her eyelashes at Yang, "We are partners, after all."

The two stared at each other for a moment before bursting into laughter.

"Ok," said Yang, "Jokes aside; we should probably get up."

Blake nodded. "Good idea. We're lucky some idiot hasn't burst in and misunderstood the whole-"

The door burst open as a very frantic, very nude Jaune Arc ran into the classroom. He looked down at Yang and Blake and yelled, "Have you two seen Weiss anywhere?"

"This isn't what it looks like!" yelled Blake.

"Also, why are you-" began Yang, her eyes drifting downwards.

Jaune waved his hands and said, "I have no time for your lesbian temptations, women! Weiss! Schnee! Have you seen her?!"

"No, we haven't seen Weiss," said Yang. "And there are no lesbian temptations! What the hell does that even-"

"Damn," interrupted Jaune. "I've checked everywhere. Everywhere except…the courtyard!" He turned and ran out of the room, giving the two girls an unobstructed look at his rear.

Blake and Yang stood up and stared at the doorway. "So…" began Blake. "I know I'm really tired, but I didn't just hallucinate that, right? Jaune was really-"

"Naked?" offered Yang. "Yes, he was. And also surprisingly muscular."

"I know," said Blake. She blushed slightly. "I-I didn't realize guys could get that-"

"I know!" said Yang, her own cheeks reddening. "Where do you think he puts it all?"

Blake shook her head. "Well," she said, "Now that that awkward moment is over, I think I'll take that shower. A cold one."

"Me too," agreed Yang. She quickly added, "Not with you, you know. Just sort of standing in the shower next to you. Under a different showerhead. Not together."

"Right, right," said Blake. "Afterwards, I'll probably just climb into bed." She blinked. "My bed. No one else's."

The two of them stared at each other for a moment.

"Wow, Jaune made things really awkward, didn't he?" asked Blake.

"I'll say," agreed Yang. "Him and his 'lesbian temptations'."

The two of them laughed loudly for a few seconds before falling back into an uneasy silence. After a few moments, they left the room, neither of them looking each other in the eye.

From the top row of the student's seats, Professor Oobleck sipped his mug of coffee. "…I wonder why none of them realized I was here the whole time?" he asked himself. He shrugged and took another sip from his mug.

Meanwhile:

Jaune strolled down the path to the courtyard, wondering why there was a sudden chill in the air. Deciding to check the weather later, Jaune spotted a beautiful white flower growing on the grass. He plucked it from the ground smelled it. "This will be perfect!" he said to himself. "Now to find-"

"Neptune!" said a familiar voice from around the corner.

Jaune froze. "Oh no…" he muttered. He slowly crept to the edge of the path and looked around the edge of the building. Weiss and Neptune were further down the path, speaking to one another.

"-I know this is a little sudden," said Weiss, "but-"

"No…" whispered Jaune.

"Would you like to…"

"No," said Jaune.

"Spar with me, sometime?" asked Weiss.

Jaune exhaled the breath he had been holding and wiped his sweaty forehead. "For a second, I thought she was going to-"

"Sure," answered Neptune.

"Great!" Weiss clapped her hands excitedly. "And will you also accompany me to the dance tomorrow night?"

Jaune sighed. "Yeah, that's what I was afraid would happen," he muttered to himself. He dropped the flower and walked away from the corner of the building, already knowing what Neptune's answer would be.

The next night:

Yang tapped her fingers on the podium as she waited for everyone to file into the ballroom. She blew some hair away from her face and casually adjusted the strap of her short, white dress. At the sound of the door opening, she glanced up. She smiled at the newcomer and said, "You look so beautiful!"

"I look stupid," grumbled Ruby as she slowly and unsteadily stepped towards Yang. She was wearing a red sleeveless dress and black high heeled shoes, which she was currently glaring down at. "Why couldn't I just wear my regular shoes?" she complained as she stumbled towards the podium.

"You can't dance in combat boots," said Yang, reaching out to grab Ruby before she fell.

"I can't even walk in these," said Ruby as she dangled in Yang's arms. "What if I need to fight somebody?"

Yang gave her an odd look. "Who do you think would fight at a dance?" She hauled Ruby up to her feet and smacked her rear, making her jump forwards. "Now, go have fun!" She gave Ruby a grin and turned back to the podium.

Ruby rubbed her butt as she glared at Yang. "Go have fun…" she repeated. She sighed and made her way to the punch bowl. "This night is going to be boring…"

Outside the ballroom, Sun cursed under his breath as he wrangled with the tie on his neck. He was wearing his usual jeans and sneakers, but had put on a black, buttoned-up shirt. "Stupid…fuck…" he grumbled, twisting and pulling the tie. "How the hell do you even-?"

"So, this may be a bad time," said a voice behind him, "But do you want to go inside?"

Sun turned around and saw that Blake was standing behind him. She was wearing a short, purple dress that had a split side, allowing him a view at her smooth, pale leg. Blake looked far more rested than she had in days; the bags under her eyes had vanished completely. She smiled as she strode forward and grabbed his hand.

"Wow…" muttered Sun, as he and Blake walked towards the door. He cleared his throat and said, "You look great. Not just because you're gorgeous, but because you look more relaxed."

Blake smiled at him. "Thank you. I had some sense knocked into me."

Sun sniffed the air. "And you don't smell like a locker room anymore!"

Blake narrowed her eyes at him.

Sun paled slightly. "N-not that you did before, but…you know…" He fell silent for a moment. "Did I mention you're gorgeous?" He cleared his throat again and said, "Boy, it's hot out here, huh? We should probably get inside and forget I said anything."

Blake rolled her eyes, but there was a small smile on her face. "As fun as it would be to see you try and talk your way out of this, I agree. We have a dance to go to…together."

Sun looked down at her. "Together?" he repeated hopefully.

Blake nodded and squeezed Sun's hand. "Together."

They opened the door and headed inside.

Minutes later:

The dance had started as classical music filled the ballroom. Students had paired up and were waltzing with one another, moving to the music.

"Who knew you were such a good dancer?" asked Blake. She gave her dance partner a glare. "Although your hand is getting a little too low for comfort…again."

Yang gave her a grin as she moved her hand up to Blake's back. "My bad. Must be those lesbian temptations." She twirled Blake and let her go. "Thanks for the dance, partner," she said, giving Blake a wink and a small curtsy.

Blake smiled and curtsied back. "Thanks for yesterday."

Yang grinned at her and turned to see Sun approaching them. "She's all yours!" she said, slapping Sun's shoulder.

Sun winced slightly at the slap, but smiled as he approached Blake. Taking her hand in his, he reached out and grabbed Blake's back, pulling her close. Yang smiled and walked off, leaving the two alone.

"So…" said Sun as he and Blake began to dance. "What are 'lesbian temptations' and should I be concerned or intrigued?"

Blake blushed and forcefully stepped on Sun's foot.

Yang walked to the side of the room and watched Blake and Sun with a smile on her face. Despite the fading redness on her cheeks, Blake looked happy as she danced with Sun. For once, her mind didn't seem to be fixated on what Torchwick and the White Fang were up to.

"I'm just saying that, as leader, I should have been the one to lead!" said a voice, snapping Yang out of her thoughts. Yang turned her head and saw Weiss and Ruby walking towards her.

"And, had you actually known how to dance, I would have let you," said Weiss. Like Yang, she was wearing a sleeveless white dress, although she had cutouts on both sides of her waist. As the two of them came closer, Weiss looked over at Yang. "How is Blake doing?"

Yang gave her a grin and pointed over at the couple. Blake was laughing as Sun hopped up and down on one foot. She spotted the other three looking at her and gave them a small wave.

"Looks like everything worked out!" said Ruby as she energetically waved back at Blake.

"Told you," said Yang. She blew on her knuckles and rubbed them on her dress. "I'm the best."

"I'll say," agreed Weiss. She sighed and said, "Well, I've got to go back to making quadruple-checking everything. See you all later." She turned and walked away, leaving the sisters alone.

"And I should probably go back to welcoming people inside," said Yang. She began walking back to her podium.

"But…what about me?" asked Ruby.

"Just have fun!" called Yang before she disappeared into the crowd.

"Fun…" repeated Ruby. She glanced around at the people around her and failed to recognize any of them. "Right…" She slowly made her way back to the punch bowl.

"A little thirsty tonight, Miss Rose?" asked a voice.

She looked up and saw Professor Ozpin standing next to the snack table, holding two glasses of punch in his hands. He offered one to Ruby and asked, "Not enjoying yourself?"

"Not really," said Ruby. "I'd rather be out killing monsters."

Ozpin chuckled. "Well, you won't be able to spend all your time on the battlefield, no matter how much you may want to."

"But I really want to, though," whined Ruby.

Ozpin smiled at her briefly, but sobered quickly. "You may be too young to realize this now, but times like this don't come around every day. One day, you may look back on this night and wish you could come back to spend just one more hour with those you care about."

Ruby shifted uncomfortably. "That's a little depressing."

"So is getting older," answered Ozpin. "Although, even that has its perks." He smiled at Ruby. "Like the fact that young people are forced to listen to you ramble on and on. Before I leave you with your punch, I'd like to give you one last bit of advice: You never know what tomorrow may bring. You can spend your time planning for it…" He gestured to where Blake was dancing with Sun. "…Or you could spend your time training for it…" He nodded to Ruby. "…And, to an extent, that's fine. But you can't forget to enjoy the present. Time moves on and things change far faster than you realize. It is the moments like these and the memories we make that help us through it." He grinned and gave Ruby a small bow. "Enjoy the party, Ruby." He turned and walked away.

Ruby blinked. "…Did I just learn something?" She shrugged and took a sip of punch.

Back at her podium, Yang straightened her dress and looked up as the door opened. She smiled at the new arrivals and said, "You guys are just in time! I almost thought you wouldn't make it."

Mercury smirked as he and Emerald strolled into the room. "Don't worry, Blondie. We wouldn't miss this for the world. We'd kill to be here." He chuckled quietly before breaking out into evil laughter. Emerald sighed and quickly elbowed Mercury in the gut, making him wheeze.

Yang blinked. "…Neat."

Jaune eventually realized he was naked, but figured that, since nobody confronted him about it, they must not have noticed.

It is likely that Pyrrha, Blake, and Yang did in fact notice, as each of them spent two hours taking a very cold shower.

But not together. Only, like, next to each other.

Stupid lesbian temptations.