A/N: I know this isn't one of the stories I should actually be updating, but I've lost a lot of momentum on them at the moment (and yes I know you're all annoyed, I'm annoyed with myself as well). This is just a oneshot that I cranked out in the past hour or so, so it might be shitty or whatever but it's my take on a conversation that just needs to happen already! There's a possibility of me continuing this if you guys ask for more, so make sure to R&R! Thanks love you all and sorry for my slow updating!


"You are the most insensitive, self absorbed, jerk!" Lucy shouted bringing the entire guild's eyes to where she and Natsu stood arguing. They'd been doing that a lot lately and it put all their friends on edge. they weren't used to the two partners constantly being at each other's throats.

"I'm self absorbed?" Natsu scoffed, practically sneering at her. "You can't even go two minutes with out looking in a mirror."

"At least I care what people think of me. You'd go week without a shower if we all didn't make you take one! What kind of," but before she could finish her sentence, a sword slammed down into the table between them and they both sprang away.

"That's enough!" Erza shouted. "You two are behaving like children. Something is bothering you two and you are going to sit down and actually talk for once like adults."

Startled, Lucy stared at Erza with wide eyes. "What?"

"I'm tired of hearing you two argue all the time. You're becoming almost as bad as Elfman and Ever, but they don't mean any of the things they say." Erza's glare cut through Lucy; making her shiver in the otherwise warm guild hall.

"Look, Erza, I appreciate you trying to help, but," Lucy started, but wasn't given a chance to finish. Before she could, Erza's arm had hooked under her waist and thrown Lucy over her shoulder.

Meanwhile, her other hand had grabbed the back of Natsu's scarf and she began to drag him and carry Lucy out of the main hall and into one of the many unused rooms towards the back.

Kicking open the door, Erza literally threw Natsu into the room—who, surprisingly, wasn't putting up a fight—and set Lucy down. "You two need to get over what ever it is bothering you and, until you do, you're not leaving this room." With that, she turned around and slammed the door shut behind her.

There was a moment of silence as Lucy stared at the door in disbelief. Erza had never treated her so roughly.

"What's the likelihood that she's not standing outside the door?"

Natsu chuckled, the sound scratchy and forced. "I'd say zero."

"Great," Lucy muttered; crossing her arms over her chest.

Silence descended between them, but Lucy refused to be the first to speak. She might have been the one to start their stupid argument, but it wasn't her fault things had changed between them. She hadn't been the one to leave.

"Lucy," Natsu said, his voice hesitant. "Glaring at the door isn't going to get us out."

She rolled her eyes; maintaining her glare. "It's worth a shot."

He scoffed. "Or you could actually talk to me."

"There's nothing to talk about Natsu."

"Bullshit." He practically spat the word at her and internally she cringed. "You've been picking fights with me ever since we found Juvia and it's just gotten worse as time went on. If you have something to say to me Lucy just say it, don't bottle it up and lash out at me whenever you feel like it."

Clenching her jaw and willing herself not to cry, Lucy spun around. "Natsu there's nothing I can say because there's nothing you can do to fix how I'm feeling."

"I can try if you'd just talk to me. I know something's up. You haven't been able to look me in the eye for weeks. Even now you're not looking at me. Why won't you look at me Lucy?"

He stood up so fast that Lucy didn't have a chance to turn around before he was in front of her; forcing her eyes to meet his. Looking into his deep onyx eyes for a brief second, her heart seized in her chest. It was too much. He couldn't be this close to her, not now, not when he was making her look at him. She'd been avoiding it for so long, not wanting to see the hurt and pain she felt echoed in his eyes.

Unable to bear it any longer, she snapped her eyes closed.

"Damn it Lucy!" He cried, his breath hot on her face. "Please."

Her heart broke when his voice cracked, but even then she didn't open her eyes.

"Natsu, I can't."

"Why?"

Her heart broke when his voice cracked, but even then she didn't open her eyes. "It hurts too much."

There was silence between them again and Lucy could sense Natsu searching her face; trying to understand what she meant.

"What," he asked.

Swallowing, Lucy considered her words before speaking. "It hurts to look at you Natsu. You left me for a year. You just…disappeared. And I understand why you left, or at least my mind does, but my heart…my heart can't get past the fact that you went away and said goodbye to me in a letter. A letter I don't even have anymore because I re-read it so much and so often trying to understand how you could abandon me, that it fell apart."

"Lucy," he said, but she didn't let him continue.

"I thought that when you came back, my eyes would just drink you up. That I'd never be able to look away from you again. That everything would be good again, but that isn't what happened. You've changed and that almost makes it easier to accept. I can almost accept that you left me and that the reason you left is because something changed in you after Tartarus. And when I look at you, I see that change. Your hair is longer, you're stronger and taller, and even your voice is different. But when I look in your eyes, I'm reminded of the boy who comforted me after my dad died. I'm reminded of the boy who reassured me that magic wasn't inherently evil after Éclair passed away as well and promised to protect my future no matter what the cost to him. The boy who was my best friend." She took a deep breath, that had been more than she was willing to say and she'd barely scratched the surface of why she was hurting so much. "That's why I can't look at you Natsu. Because I thought you would be the one person who wouldn't hurt me. I was wrong though. You did hurt me. Much more than anyone else ever has."

Even with her eyes closed, Lucy could feel tears gathering in them. She didn't want to cry though. That would hurt him infinitely more than what she just said.

She felt Natsu move away and slowly, after making sure no stray tears would fall, Lucy opened her eyes.

He was across the room once more, his body angled toward her, but his eyes were hidden beneath his bangs. Even so, Lucy knew he was beating himself up. Taking every single word she'd uttered to heart.

"Natsu, I'm not angry with you. It comes out as anger because I'm trying so hard to hide how much you leaving hurt me. I didn't want you to do this. To beat yourself up over leaving me because it's something you had to do. I know that. Otherwise you never would have left."

He nodded, but didn't raise his head.

"Natsu?"

"Was," he said finally.

"What?"

"You said I was your best friend."

Lucy opened her mouth, but no words came out. She hadn't even realized she'd spoken in the past tense.

"Igneel died," he blurted out.

"I know. Gajeel and Wendy told me what happened with the dragons."

He shivered and Lucy had the urge to cross the room and pull him close, but she knew better. He didn't want her comfort.

"Igneel…Igneel didn't just fade away. Acnologia ripped him apart."

A gasp escaped Lucy and he looked up sharply at the sound. Their eyes connected for the second time, but this time Lucy didn't break it. "I'm so sorry Natsu."

"I couldn't bear to be so helpless anymore. I wanted to get stronger so I would never have to watch anyone I loved die again. That's why…why I," he chocked on his words, silvery trails paving their way down his cheeks.

"That's why you left," she finished for him.

He nodded. "I wanted to bring you with Lucy, but I didn't want to put you in danger. I thought the guild would look after you when I left. I had no idea that Master would disband Fairy Tail. Otherwise I never would have…" He shut his eyes and Lucy waited patiently for him to gather his words.

"I thought about you every single day while I was gone. Happy and I talked for hours about what we thought you were doing at that moment and what you'd do to us once we got back. Every time I got in a fight and won, I'd turn around expecting you to be there, but then I would remember that it was just Happy and me and my victory would taste bitter. Every night, before I went to sleep, I worried that you were cold or lonely or sad or in danger. I might have left you Lucy, but I didn't, for one second, stop missing you."

Lucy sucked in her breath. 'Did he just…? No,' she answered herself. His words didn't mean anything. He'd say the same thing to any of his nakama.

"I missed you too Natsu." She blushed at her lack of response, but she didn't know what else to say.

The corner of his mouth twitched upward. "I couldn't come back until I got strong enough to protect you and everyone else. It took longer than I expected, and I'm sorry, but now I know I won't ever feel that way again."

Sharp words filled her mind, but Lucy bit them back. Now wasn't the time to voice more of her pain, Natsu was the one would was hurting. She'd just have to wait.

Instead she smiled and held open her arms. "You'll always be the strongest person I know Natsu."

He grinned at her comment, and eagerly bounded across the room to gather her into his arms. He pressed her to him and spun them both around until they were both laughing and dizzy.

Still holding her in his arms, Natsu pulled back so he could see her face. "I'll never leave you again, Lucy, I promise."

Outwardly, she smiled, but on the inside her heart broke. 'Don't make promises you can't keep, Natsu.'