CHAPTER 42:

TOWARDS THE FUTURE

It was a few days later, and Sakura, Haku, Kakashi and Tsunade were gathered in Naruto's hospital room, Hinata having been gently escorted out. It had taken some time for the jinchuriki to recover, even with the help from the Kyuubi's chakra. Naruto had later relayed that, during their clash at the Valley of the End, Sasuke had used the Chidori. He told Naruto to put everything he could into their fight. And he did. Sasuke won by a slender margin, and he needed to draw upon the Cursed Seal's grotesque transformation to do so.

Naruto was understandably unhappy about learning about what Sasuke had done, and that it had been kept from him. But he was at least willing to listen now.

Tsunade looked at them all. "You are all aware by now that Sasuke Uchiha has faked his defection to Oto, and its leader, Orochimaru. This is an S-Ranked secret, just as Naruto's parentage and his status as a jinchuriki are. We had to send a number of you out to pursue him in order to lend it verisimilitude. Sasuke is now a rogue shinobi of Konoha, officially. Unofficially, he is a double agent. We have given him ways and means to feed information to us discreetly, but this will be a deep cover mission, to gather information on Oto, and on Orochimaru. And through Oto's resources, information on the Akatsuki, as Orochimaru was once a member of that organisation, and would doubtless try to keep tabs on it."

"Too young," Kakashi murmured sadly. "Too young to take on a mission like this."

"Hokage-sama, we know much of this already," Haku said quietly. "What is there further to add?"

Tsunade fished from her robes a trio of envelopes. "Before he left, Sasuke wrote these letters for you three. He already said what he needed to Kakashi. I suggest you read them in private, and once you're done…destroy them." Her eyes looked over to Haku. "Haku Yuki…with the absence of Sasuke Uchiha, I am tentatively reassigning you to Team 7. That being said, there may not be time to go on any missions. Jiraiya has come to me with an idea about Naruto, and Team 7 may be rendered inactive for a time. I'll let Jiraiya discuss things with you, Naruto. Given the actions of Orochimaru and the Akatsuki, we will need to up everyone's training. Which reminds me, Sakura, Kakashi and I have been discussing something. I spoke of potentially apprenticing you, as a medical ninja, but Haku is already well-versed in such things, and you expressed your desire to be known for more than being my apprentice. However, we can't let your talents go to waste."

"Tsunade wants you to divide your time, mostly between her and myself," Kakashi said, "with assistance from Haku. You have shown yourself capable of learning medical jutsus, and indeed, you can learn many others, not to mention formulating your own. Innovation is a key component of survival for shinobi. We're hoping to help you develop skills that make you excellent at intelligence gathering, as well as helping yourself and others survive. Both Naruto and Haku have no problems with frontline attack power, and neither did Sasuke. Haku is an expert combat medic, but I think maybe a jack, or rather, a jill of all trades might be a good idea."

"You lack a Bloodline Limit, and you don't have clan jutsus to fall back on…but you have intelligence and determination," Tsunade said. "A drive to learn and improve yourself. That makes you better than most. We'll talk about this in further detail later. I'd imagine you'd want to read Sasuke's parting words to you…"

It wasn't until later that Sakura plucked up the courage to read the letter, at home. Sasuke's handwriting was an untidy scrawl, a testament to his emotional state when he wrote it.

Dear Sakura,

I doubt I would have had the time to say anything to you before I left. No doubt Tsunade and Kakashi have already told you that my defection was fake, that I am joining Orochimaru as a double agent. I know you're angry, or sad, or something, but please, listen to me.

I'm frightened. I remember what he did to us when we first encountered him, in the Forest of Death. The feeling of fear induced by his killing intent. The thought of him having any power over me is already chilling, given the Cursed Seal of Heaven he branded on me. But…when I learned what Itachi did, why he did it…I realised something. I'm not sure there's a place in Konoha for me anymore, or at least for now.

When I learned the truth through the letter the Hokage left for me, I tried to kill you. Only your quick thinking saved your life, and gave me a gift I didn't deserve, the Mangekyou Sharingan. But I got that gift through betrayal…the final betrayal. If I still truly had your friendship after then, then I don't deserve it. Haku deserves it more than I.

I decided that doing this will be my penance for what I did. I will be protecting Konoha, and you. I'm sure you will become a great kunoichi, Sakura. I'm sure Haku will do a good job of protecting you. And, well, make sure Naruto doesn't get into too much trouble, okay?

I will come back. I promise. One day, I will.

Sasuke Uchiha

Sakura stared at the letter, tears beginning to well up. She re-read them, committing them to memory, before she used a weak Fire jutsu, usually used for lighting campfires, to burn it to ashes over the bathroom sink. A shame she could not keep it…as a memento of Sasuke…but she had her duty, just as Sasuke had his own.

Her parents had consoled her over the Uchiha's defection, remembering the crush she used to have. But it was little comfort. She understood Sasuke's need for expiation, but he was risking his life, his very soul, to do so.

Maybe if she had been a better friend, she might have prevented this. Or maybe if he hadn't been so fixated on his revenge, or whatever Itachi had done to him in the Tsukuyomi hadn't screwed him up so much…there were so many maybes and ifs and what could have beens in this situation.

She had started her career, such as it was, observing people, making notes…but she realised she didn't really know that much. Oh, she knew more than most her age, but today, she was more acutely aware of her own ignorance than she ever was. And it made her feel lost…

She wandered the streets of Konoha, directionless, hoping to find Haku if she had any real purpose at all, when she became aware that someone was walking next to her. Namely, the burly figure of Jiraiya. "Deep thoughts, right?" the Sannin asked.

Sakura scoffed quietly. "You might think that."

"Hey, come with me a moment, okay? I need to tell you something."

Numbly, she allowed the perverted sage to steer her to a nearby park, one that had people, though he set up some privacy seals. "Okay, there's no easy way to say this. Tsunade probably hinted at this already, but I'm taking Naruto out of Konoha for a while for training. In effect, he's going to become my apprentice. We'll be leaving within a week. I don't think the Akatsuki are going to be making any moves for a while, but I want to get Naruto ready to be able to face them. He'll need to learn how to tap into the Kyuubi's power, and I want to get him started on fuinjutsu and get some more ninjutsu in his brain. That being said, I'm not leaving you in the lurch."

"Why would you have me learn it anyway?" Sakura asked.

Jiraiya smiled warmly, as he removed a scroll from his robes. "Sakura…you managed to learn the Rasengan, albeit modified to suit your needs. You've got potential, to be a great kunoichi. I see it, Tsunade sees it, and Kakashi sees it. Naruto may be a bit thick, but frankly, so was I, and he's got energy and drive to spare. Sasuke and Haku have advantages with their Bloodline Limits, even if they trained themselves to exhaustion. And you…you're a civilian-born girl who wanted to be a shinobi. And I'd say, what I've seen of you so far, you're doing a damn good job. No clan, no Bloodline Limits, just determination and a good brain. Anyway, I wrote up this little guide while I was waiting for Naruto to recover. There's a bunch of jutsus, training exercises, and general techniques I think you'll find useful."

Sakura took the scroll tentatively. "Thank you, Jiraiya. Umm, there's no smut in there, is there?"

Jiraiya scoffed. "I'm a super-pervert, but I try not to inflict my stronger writings on the young. Though that being said…" He handed her a book, though it didn't have the usual orange cover of an Icha Icha book. "Read it. I based it once on one of my old students, a kid by the name of Nagato. I should really tell Naruto about him one day. After all, in a roundabout way, Naruto was sort of named for him."

Sakura peered at the book's title. "Tale of the Utterly Gutsy Shinobi?" she asked.

"That didn't sell as well as the Icha Icha books. I dunno why, unless it was the lack of porn," Jiraiya said with a saddened shrug. "Nagato…he deserves to be remembered in some way. That book, Naruto's parents really loved it. That's why he was named the way he was, because Minato loved the character."

"Is he dead?" Sakura asked.

"I don't know. I thought he was killed, along with his friends. I hope he wasn't, but…well, I have a bad feeling about it. Anyway, I think you'll like the book. Maybe one day, you could write about your own adventures. I'm sure you and Naruto and Haku, and all those others, will have plenty of them. Sakura…I'm glad Naruto had you as a friend, even if it took you time to be his friend. I've got a lot of lost time to make up for myself…"

Sakura didn't know what Jiraiya meant about that last remark. They spoke for a time on various subjects. Sakura had to admit, despite his perversion, Jiraiya was a vastly intelligent and compassionate man. There was much to admire in him, despite his less salubrious traits.

It felt like there was a burden on her now, a burden of expectations. Sasuke had gone off on his own mission, and Naruto was being trained by Jiraiya. So where did that leave her? They were so strong, they eclipsed her, even with her own leaps in capability. Naruto, thanks to the Uzumaki chakra levels and the Kyuubi, and Sasuke thanks to his drive to get stronger to avenge himself against Itachi. And Haku was stronger than her, partly by dint of his Bloodline Limit, and partly by dint of his training with Zabuza.

How could she ever hope to equal any of them? Be a comrade, be of use? Even with her achievements so far, she wasn't sure. She knew, on an intellectual level, that the world was far more complicated than her classmates suspected, but to experience…it left her shaken inside. The shinobi world was one filled with lies and shadows.

She returned home, and opened up Tale of the Utterly Gutsy Shinobi…and found a dedication.

To Sakura 'the Banshee' Haruno,

Never give up. And never forget, you are a worthwhile kunoichi.

Jiraiya, the Gallant Toad Sage

She smiled a little morosely at the dedication and signature. Then, she opened it up and began to read…

She was engrossed by the book, finishing nearly half of it that night. She had to admit, Jiraiya was an excellent writer. And not a hint of smut to be seen. It was an exciting romp, and yet…it felt like proper literature. So why it didn't sell as well, Sakura had no idea. Especially if it didn't sell so well before he wrote his smuttier works.

She could see why the Fourth Hokage named Naruto after the main character. The sheer determination and heroism…it was like Minato wanted him to be like the character. Sakura wondered how much the fictional Naruto was like the guy he was based on, Nagato…and how much Nagato and the real Naruto resembled each other.

She went to visit Naruto at the hospital, finding Haku and Hinata also present. Hinata was hugging her boyfriend, crying softly. Apparently she had been told the news about Naruto being taken out of Konoha to be trained. And Naruto was comforting the Hyuuga with surprising tenderness. Well, surprising for anyone who didn't know Naruto for as long as Sakura had now. He was capable of being subdued when the moment required it.

"Hey, it'll be for a couple of years, okay?" Naruto said softly. "And I've got the Pervy Sage watching my back…when he isn't chatting up women. Hinata, I promise you, I will come back. I refuse to go back on my promise. I'll be back, stronger than ever."

Hinata nodded, giving Naruto a sad smile. "Then…I promise to get stronger too."

"So will I," Sakura said. She didn't know how, but her three word sentence held all the solemnity of a vow. Haku merely nodded.

"I know you guys will," Naruto said, with the blind faith of the simple. But despite appearances, simplicity didn't quite mean stupidity. Naruto had faith in them because he was certain they were strong, in body, mind and soul.

The four friends joined together in a group hug. The son of the Fourth Hokage, scorned by the village for his burden. A Hyuuga, disdained for her timidity and empathy. A refugee from Kiri persecuted for his Bloodline Limit. And a civilian wannabe kunoichi. Unlikely friends, and yet…here they were, in an affirmation of their bonds of friendship and camaraderie. Even though Naruto was going to be separated from them for a long time…their bonds were going to remain strong. And they had vowed to get stronger.

It was with renewed determination, trying to silence her doubts, that Sakura approached Kakashi and Tsunade. They knew what she had come to them for. Not merely to get stronger, but to refine herself. They warned her, bluntly, that it would be an uphill battle, not to discourage her, but to remind her that it was a tough path, one filled with pain and effort, toil and sweat.

But she was prepared. Oh, she still had her doubt, but it was drowned out by her resolve. She needed to get stronger, for her friends' sake and her own. She knew what was coming, a confrontation with Orochimaru and his army, and the Akatsuki. And there were other dangers, unknown dangers, that they had to prepare for.

But even if she couldn't be ready, couldn't ever be ready, she was determined to give it a damn good shot. The training would be hard, it would be harsh. But, she hoped, it would be worth it.

And it would be easier with her friends by her side. Sasuke wasn't quite a friend anymore, but he still had a place in her heart, and Naruto…well, he would be gone with Jiraiya. But Haku, Ino, Hinata, their comrades in the various teams, their teachers…Sakura knew that it was these links that made them strong. That camaraderie formed the basis of the Will of Fire that the Third Hokage espoused.

It was with that thought that she stood with Haku and Hinata, with Kakashi by their side, along with Tsunade, some days later, waving goodbye to Naruto and Jiraiya. They waved back, knowing with utter faith, he'd be back. And they would then be truly ready to begin…

One day, I shall come back. Yes, I shall come back. Until then, there must be no regrets, no tears, no anxieties. Just go forward in all your beliefs, and prove to me that I am not mistaken in mine.

-The Doctor, from Doctor Who: The Dalek Invasion of Earth by Terry Nation.

THE END

CHAPTER 42 ANNOTATIONS NO JUTSU!:

Wow. What a trip. So, after nearly three years, this story is finally finished. This is easily my longest actual story, and it was also my first, and to date, only pure Naruto fic (that hasn't been archived and deleted, like Kunoichi and Tanuki, which you can find in The Forbidden ANBU Files if you want to read what I wrote). I haven't really gotten a Naruto fanfic off the ground since then, albeit not for want of trying, as followers of The Forbidden ANBU Files will know.

I wrote this story specifically as an antidote to Sakura-bashing, as there's so many Sakura-bashing fics out there. Don't get me wrong, I like fics with Sakura-bashing in them, but I think there are times when one should try to go against the flow. I hope a lot of you enjoyed my sojourn into Sakura's psyche.

Also, it's highly unlikely that I will bother doing a sequel. At best, I may do a one-shot epilogue down the track, showing what happened after Naruto canon, but I am yet to read the manga post-timeskip. If I do do another story, it'll be either a crossover, or else one of those Western Emperor stories that was popularised by the like of authors like Snafu the Great, or maybe one of those hidden Bloodline Limit stories.

And Observations of a Wannabe Kunoichi is not the only story I have updated recently. Admittedly, most of the stories are Potterverse ones, but those following this story are probably followers of my fics, and probably know that already. Amongst other things includes a new story, my 100th posted, a crossover between Kingdom Hearts and the Potterverse called Hollow Heroes.

Anyway, with no numbered annotations this time, I'd just better say one last thing.

Be seeing you!