Notes: even if it doesn't look like it, i persevered on these for so many hours, i can't even tell if it's good anymore. please have mercy on my soul. QvQ

IMPORTANT: Starting this chapter, this story will branch out into two different routes. Please visit my profile to find the links if you are interested. Be warned: the alternate route is rated 'E', and may contain disturbing themes. Individual warnings are posted each chapter.

You can skip it if you're bothered by that, but if you aren't, then I encourage you to try reading them both. Each route reveals different secrets and perspectives. :)

There's like 2 chapters left to this though, so it's still gonna be a short read. Hope you enjoy! :)

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

The call that comes in is for a fire.

They arrive at the scene of a murder.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

They call it miraculous, the way he was found. By the time the fire trucks had arrived, the house was almost entirely devoured by flames. It was protocol that coerced the rescue men to barge in through the last door in the hallway, and they are glad they did.

Hide is led away from the fire, unharmed and unsinged.

His parents' bodies are carted away shortly thereafter, the unnatural fist-sized hole in his father's chest enough to warrant a call for the police. His mother, just barely alive, is loaded into the ambulance beside him where the EMTs work to stabilize her.

He stares at her body unblinkingly, numb. One of the firemen had given him a safety blanket when he was first carried out and he curls his fists tighter in its folds, wraps it closer around his body as if simulating an embrace.

Before they leave, he picks up the panicked murmurs of the crowd edging the police tape. He recognizes their neighbors, dark-eyed and pajama-clad, drawn in by the chaos caused by the arrival of the fire trucks, ambulance, and police. They look at him, pity stark in their eyes as he reaches out to touch his mother's hand, pale and dangling from the side of the table.

"Poor child. His father is dead, and now his mother might be next too."

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

"At least he's still alive."

It's hot. Cold fingers skim over Hide's forehead and he stirs, confusion addling his brain as he tries to piece the jagged memories in his mind together, his eyes twitching open at the light that hits it.

'There was an attack...fire..broke out. Guy...died. And then…'

["...possibility of a trauma..."]

It hurts to open his eyes. It's hard and it hurts and all he seems to see is black.

'And then?'

[He is met by a mask with a large, lipless grin,]

"Oh look, I think he's waking up."

[and a single]

"Tch. It's about time."

[burning]

He opens his eyes.

The room is on fire.

[eye.]

"Wake up!"

"GET AWAY FROM ME!" Hide shoots up and swings at the person beside him, his body rushing with adrenaline as his mind is filled with images of blood and fire, and that grin, that ghoul-

"Oh!"

"What the hell?"

"Calm down, you moron!" Thin, yet strong fingers grab his wrist in a vice grip, halting his fist. His other hand is immediately held down and Hide panics, violently thrashing as the feeling of ice starts to dig deep into his wrist, familiar yet unwelcome.

"Let me go! LET ME-"

Smack!

The sound echoes loudly in the room, overrides the sharp ringing that once filled his ears. His assailants' hands have let go, so Hide hesitantly touches his cheek, confused at the heat that meets his fingertips.

"Wha…?"

"Are you actually awake now or do you want a fucking encore?"

'That voice…'

Hide's vision clears, the hellish red hues fading from the edges, and he meets the shocked faces of Touka, Irimi, and Koma. From the way she is still clenching her hands, Hide guesses Touka had been the one dealing with him.

His shoulders fall, the weight of his worries gone at the realization that he is here.

'With them.'

"... Hi guys," he tries, throat dry, "Am I… in trouble?"

"You idiot!" Touka screams, leaping forward to clutch the front of his shirt in her hands, "Do you have any idea how worried we were?"

Hide winces at the close proximity of her face ('this is not the time to think of your crush') and attempts a shaky smile, "I… guess I am, then?"

He guesses by the angry red hue of her cheeks (and Koma's low whistle) that it is not the right answer.

Perhaps aware of it herself, Irimi lays a hand on Touka's shoulder to catch her attention, "That's enough. Put him down, Touka-chan," she says soothingly.

Touka begrudgingly releases him, but the anger in her face refuses to leave (along with a small, secret emotion Hide likes to think is concern).

["I knew it. I knew we never should have sent you there." she mutters lowly.]

"How do you feel, Hide-kun?" Irimi asks.

"Great, actually!" he chirps, "Thanks for taking care of me. Although if you don't mind me asking, how exactly did I get here? The last thing I remember was fainting in the CCG."

A pause.

"Yeah, about that," Koma says slowly, "We were wondering if you would tell us about it too. It was actually kind of strange, how we found you."

"What do you mean?"

"Allow me to answer that," Everyone turns to the door as the manager walks in, a hint of a frown on his face.

"Yoshimura-san, you're here?" Hide says in surprise, "Who's tending to the shop?"

"We closed it down for the day," he replies, raising a hand when Hide's expression morphs to one of guilt, "Don't worry. Everybody agreed to do it. We were more concerned for you when we heard that the CCG had been attacked while you were there. It was too distracting, so we decided it would be for the best to close shop for a while. During that time, someone had rung the doorbell. Imagine our surprise when we found you outside."

"Someone...brought me here? Who?"

"I'm afraid that's something I can not answer," The manager says as a kind smile finds its way to his face, "Although we're also curious, I suppose it's enough that they brought you back, safe and sound."

"Barely looked like you were in a fire," Koma remarks, "Real lucky of you, honestly."

[like a miracle]

Hide smiles thinly, "Yeah. I guess you're right."

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

"I heard you were caught in the raid the other day."

It's morning. Anteiku is filled with a quiet, sleepy atmosphere that feels almost homey. The light that streams through the windows lends the cafe a dreamy allure and highlights the warmth the azaleas bring with their petals, pretty and pink.

Hide strokes the one on the counter, "So I guess that explains these, huh? What was it again? Take care of yourself for me?"

Hide inwardly preens at the mildly surprised look on Naoki's face.

"Yes," Naoki replies, "I must admit, I was curious when I saw that Anteiku was closed. I managed to find out about your condition when I tried to visit one time, and overheard the others talk about the raid."

"Oh, I see," Hide says, forcing himself to suppress the nagging suspicion in the back of his mind, "That's pretty nice of you, though I didn't think you'd care about Anteiku all that much. Aren't there like a million other coffee shops you can visit around here? I mean, you're an editor, you probably have a list available whenever your favorite one closes."

Naoki hums, "Yes. But then they wouldn't have you."

Hide coughs loudly, irritated at the heat that floods his cheeks and the embarrassment that continues to rear its ugly head whenever Naoki gifts him with one of his gems.

'Stupid literature nerds and their stupidly lethal way with words.'

"... escaped?"

"Excuse me?" Hide asks, shaking his head, "Sorry I didn't catch that."

"I was simply wondering: how exactly did you escape?"

"Oh! That. Um," How did he escape? As far as he and everyone else in Anteiku knew, he fainted (probably because of smoke inhalation), was rescued, and then anonymously dropped onto the cafe's doorstep.

He says so to Naoki, who cocks an eyebrow questioningly.

"Don't you find any of that strange? Let's say someone did rescue you- why didn't they take you to a hospital? How would they know to take you to Anteiku? How did they manage to escape the ghouls that were said to have caused the attack? And why would they save you specifically?"

These are all questions Hide has entertained ever since he woke up, ones his mind have offered numerous explanations for that he has sifted and sorted through.

Why didn't they take you to a hospital?

"Maybe they thought I didn't need it?"

Wait, no. That's stupid.

Then maybe they couldn't go… because it was a public place? Because they would be questioned?

How would they know to take you to Anteiku?

"Because of the uniform, duh."

But still. Why would they take me to my work place? If they didn't wanna go to the hospital, and they didn't wanna leave me in the building, and they didn't wanna deal with me, why not just drop me off at my apartment? My address was in my wallet!

Because they knew there would be someone there to take care of me?

How did they manage to escape the ghouls that were said to have caused the attack?

"They're ridiculously good at sneaking?"

Or they had experience. They knew what they were dealing with.

And they had the strength to deal with it.

And why would they save you specifically?

"I was obviously a helpless civilian, and maybe even the first one they saw?"

Or, they knew me.

Hide feels ridiculous at his excuses, knows by the quirk in his smile that Naoki is thinking the same thing. Still, he doesn't dare entertain the other answers, not when adding them all up gave him only one response.

'A ghoul knows me. And it saved me.'

"You know, Takatsuki is working on another novel lately," Naoki says out of the blue. Hide stares at him, wondering what this has to do with him, but nods politely anyway, "She says she wants to write about ghouls. I accompanied her to the CCG to get some material, but they were sorely disappointing. Their perspective was limited and predictable, unfit for a potential protagonist."

'Could it have been him?'

"Oh. Really." Hide says, "Let me guess: they just think all ghouls are mindless, sadistic monsters?"

Naoki eyes him, a thin smile creeping on his lips, "I wonder, do you think the same? Tell me now, how do you feel about ghouls?"

"Me? Well-"

'Why would he do that?'

"I guess I can't really answer that, since I've never met one!" Hide laughs.

"Would you like too?"

'Why?'

"Why not? We can have coffee together, just like a date! I'll order some takeout, and he can eat the delivery guy!" Hide babbles, standing up and scooting away from the counter as a woman waves him in, "Well, this has been interesting, but I really need to work now. Thanks for the stimulating conversation, Naoki-san! See you!" he waves, dashing away in a flurry of orange and brown.

"... See you, Hide."

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

'This can't be happening.'

It's midnight, or close to it. Hide stands by the door to his bedroom, one hand on the light switch and another with a knife, as he holds the gaze of the ghoul standing outside his balcony window.

"You know, I was just kidding, right?" he calls out. The knife in his hand twitches as the ghoul walks forward, gently placing a hand on the window's surface.

The white hair. That fucking creepy mask.

It's him.

[his knees are shaking. it hurts to breathe. he can't do this. he can't he can't he can't]

"Why are you here?" Hide demands. Then he hears it.

drip. drip.

drip.

It's midnight, or close to it. The neighborhood is silent in sleep, and the drops of his blood echo loud and clear.

The ghoul is hurt.

"...Are you asking for help?" Hide asks, voice small.

He could do it. The wound looks non-fatal, even with the blood. He is a Pre-Med student after all.

'Not that this ghoul should know that.'

The ghoul only inclines his head, that single burning eye focused entirely on him. Hide tries to take a step back but his knees only knock together and send him sprawling to the ground. The knife clatters, and he grabs for it in a panic, looking up to see the ghoul staring at him in silence.

This is incredibly stupid and dangerous. Hide should just call the CCG right now.

'But… he saved me, didn't he?'

"Idiot, who can say that for sure?" Hide mutters.

'But he was the only one there. He could have killed you then. But he didn't.'

Silence. Hide hesitates, then looks again.

The ghoul is still there. Silent. Bleeding.

"Oh God," Hide breathes, "Touka-chan is right. I am an idiot."

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

The moment he takes off his shirt, all thoughts of Touka are pushed to the side in favor of ogling the ('chiseled fucking abs- this is so unfair!') large wound covering the ghoul's side. Hide snaps out of his trance long enough to slip into another one- a professional demeanor he seamlessly adopts as he works to treat the wound.

"That should do it," he says, carefully patting the bandaged area. The ghoul stays silent throughout the time, and Hide can't decide if it is relieving or unnerving. Nevertheless, he makes up for the lack of words as he always does, rambling on and on about medical lingo and observations as he treated him.

Now though, he can't find any words to say. The wound is treated, his job is done, and yet the ghoul won't leave.

"Will-"

Suddenly, it stands up. Hide yelps as the ghoul walks past him, scolds himself for being careless enough to believe that it had any good intentions or that, by some reason or another, it wouldn't murder him.

'Great! As thanks for treating a fucking ghoul, you get to be eaten to preserve the intelligence of the human race. Bravo, Hide.'

"No shit. Crap. You can still make it. Just do what you should've done in the first place and call the CCG-!"

Hide is cut off by the sound of glass breaking.

Surprised, he cautiously follows the sound to his kitchen and finds nothing but a broken window, and a steaming cup of coffee.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Months pass.

Hide doesn't meet the ghoul again.

Naoki, though, is always there.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

It's dawn, too early to rise for anyone who didn't own a business. This time, Touka has finals to attend to, so Hide finds himself at the helm once again.

He's alone at the counter, wondering whether or not he could get away with skipping class this night, when the bell suddenly rings.

"Oh sorry, we're still clo-"

They're white this time. If he weren't already so accustomed to identifying them, Hide might even say they were roses.

(They're not though, and it annoys him (excites him) to think there are still many he doesn't know of.)

He's moving even before he knows it, and carefully takes the weight from his arms.

"Good morning, Hayate," Hide smiles.

He doesn't know when this started- doesn't know how he has grown so used to calling Naoki by his first name. Doesn't know how he has grown so used to greeting him with a smile derived from genuine pleasure.

"Good morning, Hide."

He wonders too, if Naoki knows how he has grown to return these smiles without the ice (the mystery) that usually accompanies them. Wonders if he knows he has dimples when he truly and honestly smiles.

Hide wonders if he knows how beautiful they are now.

"Would you like to go on a date with me this weekend?"

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Even in winter, Anteiku radiates an aura of warmth. It is something Irimi has always loved and taken comfort in, quietly pleased when the customers mention it.

Still, the warmth that it holds this particular day is different. Somehow, it is far more soothing, more open, more welcoming, and bright.

She spots Hide by the corner of her eye, a dream outlined in the very curves of his face, and thinks she might know why.

"Oh, how delightful. What beautiful flowers you have here."

Irimi looks down from her pad to see her customer admiring the flowers on the tables, "Oh thank you. They were a gift."

The woman grins, a twinkle in her eye, "A gift, you say? My. Do you know what it means?"

"Ah, no. What is it?"

"These gorgeous flowers right here are called gardenias. They are given to tell the recipient:

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

"I think I'm falling in love with you."

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Out of irony, their first date is in a coffee shop.

Hide almost feels like a traitor at how many cakes he ordered, but figures he gets a free pass for his first date (besides, it's not like the guys at Anteiku have to know). Also, Naoki obviously seems to take pleasure in seeing him enjoy himself so much, so he lets himself have fun just to keep that smile alive.

"So how's the book coming along?" he asks. There's a slight pause as Naoki stares at him, then chuckles, grabbing his napkin to dab at the corner of Hide's mouth (who is definitely not blushing fifty shades of red right now).

"You make me feel like I'm dating a child," Naoki teases. Hide pouts.

"It's going well," he answers, "She is simply a little stuck on the ending. Not that I blame her. It is the hardest part to write, next to the beginning."

"So what's it gonna be? A happy ending, or a tragic one?" Hide asks curiously, eyes wide and attentive.

"Honestly Hide. I don't know either. I guess we'll just have to wait and see."

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

After downing about three cups of 'coffee' (read: sugar with a little bit of coffee mixed in), Hide predictably excuses himself to go to the restroom. He aims to take care of it quickly, excited at the prospect of spending more time on this date, but Fate is a downer and curses him with an unnaturally long wait for the single, unisex restroom.

(It was diarrhea. Of course it was.)

He already has an excuse on the tip of his tongue, a skip in his step as he goes back to their table. He is just so happy to be here that the sudden downfall of his mood is jarring enough to make him stop in his tracks.

There's a guy there. There's another guy sitting before Naoki and making him smile.

He's gorgeous too- with his purple hair, slender face, and high cheekbones. Even if that suit is the tackiest thing Hide has ever seen in his life, he wears it so perfectly and elegantly that it's almost unfair.

(And at least he's wearing a suit. The closest thing Hide has to formal wear is a t-shirt with a tuxedo printed on it.)

He and Naoki complement each other perfectly, both so beautiful, and elegant, and cultured.

Hide debates the risk of leaving. Before he can make a decision, Naoki looks up, catches his eye, and beams.

(And oh, it's so gorgeous, even purple man has to stop and look at what he's smiling at.)

'It's me. He's smiling at me.' Hide thinks.

"I have to go now," he hears Naoki says. The purple man murmurs something in a foreign language almost panickedly, but Naoki ignores him, his eyes focused entirely on Hide. And though it makes him feel selfish, Hide is glad to know that.

(Let him be selfish, just for this moment.)

"You took your time," Naoki says the moment they meet. He slips his hand into Hide's, their fingers a comfortable fit, and Hide flushes with pleasure at the thought.

"Sorry. This place only has one bathroom and someone decided to have diarrhea in it," he explains, "So, should we go?"

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

It's how you end a date, right?

He leans in, eyes halfway shut. Naoki follows him, a hand coming to cup his cheek as their lips finally meet.

Through the haze, Hide can only think of one thing:

'He tastes like mint and coffee.'

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Note: somebody catch that foreshadowing for me pls. thx.