Disclaimer: Anything you recognise, including characters, belong to their respective owners. This is a work of fiction and does not represent reality, please treat it as such.

You'll Always Be My Baby

-x-

Jon was sitting on the couch watching a replay of the game when he heard Renee on the phone.

"Nikki I'm so sorry, I'd love to come meet you girls but we only got her home from the hospital a week ago…"

Jon frowned, getting up and heading into the kitchen to see what was going on.

"Yeah you'll have to stop by and see her tomorrow before you leave…love you too, bye!"

Jon came up behind her and kissed the back of her neck as she hung up.

"What was that about?" he asked.

"Nikki and the girls are going out tonight and wanted me to come" he explained, turning around in his arms and giving him a quick peck on the lips. He wasn't satisfied, leaning in to kiss her properly.

"Why didn't you say yes? Are you still feeling bad?"

"No, I'm feeling okay now" she shook her head. "I just don't want to go out for the night and leave you. We're new parents, I have responsibilities now"

He smiled, kissing her forehead. "Go" he told her.

"But…" she started.

"…Renee" he stopped her. "I'll be fine. Go have fun with the girls and enjoy yourself. Just because we have a baby doesn't mean you can't have a life. It's one night. She's my kid too and you'll have to trust me with her eventually"

"I do trust you Jon!" she told him quickly. "I just know it's scary having a tiny human depending on you"

He felt bad. She was up at all hours of the night breast-feeding their newborn daughter and never once complained. He was learning, but at what felt like a much slower pace than her. Renee was a natural mother. She took to it like a duck to water. Jon however, was finding it more difficult. Everything from changing diapers to bottle feeding was like learning to walk again. She'd done the lion's share of the work and as a result, he wanted her to have a night to herself.

"Go" he repeated. "She's sleeping at the moment. When she wakes I'll change her and feed her and then rock her back to sleep"

Renee thought about it for a moment. "Are you sure?" she asked, worry furrowing her brow.

"I'm sure" he told her. "I know I'm not a natural at this dad stuff but I'm getting there. If there's any problems I'll call you or your mom"

"Or Joe" she added with a smile.

"Or Joe" he repeated. "Call Nikki and tell her you can make it"

"Okay…thank you baby" she whispered, leaning up to kiss him.

- x -

Renee looked beautiful as she made her way downstairs, clutch bag in-hand. Her white-blonde hair was loosely curled, red lipstick complementing her porcelain skin. White jeans and sexy red heels with a floaty black blouse finished the look.

"You look absolutely stunning" he told her, taking her hand as she came down the final steps.

"Thank you" she stepped into his embrace, closer to his height in her heels.

"I love these jeans" he let his hands rest on her ass.

"I don't know if white was a good idea though" she worried her bottom lip with her teeth.

"Why?"

"I'm still bleeding from the birth"

"Oh"

They both burst into fits of laughter.

"God, having a baby really means there's no such thing as too much information" she giggled.

He chuckled, leaning forward to kiss her forehead. "I think once you've been with someone for three years and gone through pregnancy and childbirth, there really are no boundaries any more. Especially with bodily functions"

"True" she smiled.

Making sure her purse was stocked with anything she might need in an emergency, Renee headed out.

As the front door closed, the reality of the situation hit home. He was alone. With a newborn. His newborn baby girl. For the very first time. Fuck.

As soon as Renee was gone, all of his confidence disappeared.

Tip-toeing up the stairs, he decided to check in on little Gabriella. Opening the door a crack, he could see she was still sleeping softly. For a moment, he relaxed. Then a wave of panic hit him. What if she wasn't breathing?

Rushing over to her crib, he peered over the edge and held his breath. She was so still…

She flexed her fingers in her sleep and he released a sigh of relief. Unfortunately for him, the small noise woke her.

She immediately started wailing, flailing her little arms and legs about.

With the gentlest touch he could manage, he scooped her up in her pink fleece blanket and cradled her to his chest. "Shhh…" he soothed, rocking her. She eventually began to quiet down and as she looked, up at him with her big blue eyes, he whispered to her.

"I need to ask you a favour princess…"

He smiled as she looked as though she was genuinely listening, soothed by his voice.

"I need you to be on your best behaviour for me…because I really don't know what the fuck I'm doing…"

She kicked her legs and he took that as a yes.

"Also, don't tell your mom I said fuck…"

- x -

After checking her diaper was clean, he headed downstairs to make up a bottle. She cried every time he left her alone so he fixed up her moses basket and carried her down to the kitchen with him. He tried to recall everything they'd been doing this past week as he sat down with her in one arm, the bottle in the other. It was hard when Renee had only been out of hospital seven days though.

Pressing the teat of the bottle to her tiny lips, she instinctively opened up. He kept it upright, making sure there was no air in it as she suckled at the milk contentedly. He made sure to give her a break, sitting her up and patting her back every now and again until she was refusing any more.

Popping her into her moses basket while he cleaned up, he carried her back upstairs to the nursery he and Renee had decorated for her. It was a soft pastel yellow with butterflies, her name spelled out on the wall. Her white crib sat in the centre, a butterfly mobile above it. In the corner was a white rocking chair. Joe's wife Galina had recommended they get one and it had been a godsend for the midnight feeding and helping to rock her back to sleep.

Jon sat down in it, the baby cradled in his arms as he hoped to get her back to sleep.

Of course, he couldn't be that lucky. It seems Gabriella hadn't understood his request to be on her best behaviour as well as he'd hoped. That or she was choosing to ignore it.

She fussed and cried and he just didn't know how to make her stop. She didn't need anything, she was fed and clean. It was worrying, how would he know if something was wrong? He tried to ignore that voice in his head and let her grasp his finger. He wondered if she was crying for her mom…

- x -

Renee checked her watch. Three am. She wasn't planning on staying out this long at all. In fact, she was planning to have one drink and then be back before midnight. She was a little worried about Jon, knowing this was the first time he'd be alone with their baby girl, but she also had faith in him.

Opening the front door with her key, she kicked off her heels and locked the door behind her as silently as possible. The lights were still on in the kitchen so she turned them off before heading upstairs.

Chancing a quick glance into the nursery, she had to cover her mouth with her hand to stop the noise that nearly escaped.

Sitting in the rocking chair, fast asleep, was Jon. He was still fully clothed, their baby daughter sleeping soundly on his chest.

It was the most adorable sight Renee had ever seen and she couldn't resist taking a photo on her phone. It was the moment she always dreamed of from the day she fell in love with him. She'd always imagined being a mother, and to see Jon like this when he'd always expressed his fear of parenthood…it was incredible. He'd done all this for her. And here he was, giving her this picture perfect moment, showing her what an absolute adorable softy he was. He was the father of her child and that made her so happy.

She reached up to wipe a tear from her eye, coming closer. She ran her fingers through his mop of dirty blonde hair, brushing it back from his face. His eyes fluttered open at the light contact and he was disorientated for a moment.

The baby was still sleeping deeply, curled into his shirt.

"Put her in her crib and come to bed" she smiled, brushing her lips to the top of his head.

He gave her a sleepy smile before standing slowly, taking care not to disturb their daughter. Carrying her over to the crib, he gently lowered her in, making sure she was wrapped neatly in her blanket. He set up the baby monitor so they'd know when she woke and followed Renee out of the room.

"Did you have a good night?" he asked in hushed tones as they reached their bedroom and began undressing.

"It was good, but I missed my babies" she ran a hand over his stubbly cheek. "I'm so proud of you Jon" Renee whispered, winding her arms around his neck.

He gave her a coy smile, bringing his hands up to unclip the catch of her bra. "I was just trying to get her to sleep but I guess I fell asleep too"

"You just gave me the most beautiful sight to come home to" she pressed her nose against his intimately.

"She had about three ounces of milk just after you left so she'll probably wake up in the next hour for some more" he told her, running his fingertips over the expanse of now-exposed skin.

"That's okay" she smiled. "I'll get up when she wakes"

He dipped his head to kiss her passionately.

"I love you so much" she told him. "You're gonna be such an incredible dad to our baby girl"

He didn't know how to respond to that so he just kissed her again, slowly and lovingly.

- x -

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