Warnings: This story will contain small amounts of blood, some swearing and male/male pairings. If you recognize these contents to be something you don't like on your cup of tea, please click the small "Close" symbol on the upper right corner of your screen or the small arrow pointing left on the upper left corner of your screen.
Thank you for reading.

Also, you should note that this is (obviously) an AU. (Because I've been itching to write a wing fic for ages.)

Feathers

It was painful, growing out your wings, Kuroko had heard. Your shoulder and back muscles grew and reformed over a few months and you had to keep up with a strict stretching and training schedule so they wouldn't grow deformed. After the muscles started forming, you would go through the "itch" phase, when the first feathers would push through your skin. And around the same time as the first feathers came in, would began the painful part as the joints and bones began to form and push their way through the muscles and skin.

Of course, some argued that the pain was subjective as no "real" bones would form, nor would any "real" feathers grow on your back. Some said that your brains, in order to comprehend what it saw, imagined the pain. They reasoned the extra muscles forming the same way: The brains realized there should be something to support the wings structure, which wasn't even really there, and so they made the extra muscles grow. No matter the fact, that the muscles started growing way before the wings did.

But however flimsy they sometimes made it sound, it was the only logical reason they had to offer. Because of course, such things as "magic", "destiny" and "fate" did not exist. But then, how did they explain the fact that only those who already had their wings could see the wings of others, aside from few rare exceptions? How could they explain that the wings only started to grow once they had met the person they would most likely spend the rest of their lives with? No matter that the relationship wasn't always romantic, no one could deny the connection they had with their chosen. With their "soul mate".

But of course, Kuroko had read all the explanations of how hormones affected their brains and thus, their vision. How the wings were just hallucinations to point out the partner the brains deemed most suitable et cetera. Some were really good explanations and some were just very convincing. Each of them had holes though, and the most usual hole in the explanation was the simple fact that no one could explain how some – even if it was very few – people could fly with their wings, if the wings were just a hallucination.

Really, the whole wing and soul mate business was very complicated and easily caused a headache to someone like Kagami. Kuroko had always found it curious though. Maybe it was because Kuroko was one of those few people who had seen wings ever since he could remember.

He never told anyone about it, since most of the people he did tell, usually looked at him pityingly. It was not a secret that those who could see wings from their birth usually never grew their own wings. They never found their soul mates. First Kuroko hadn't cared all that much. He was a naïve little child who thought kissing was gross and that all the love he needed he got from his parents.

But as he grew up, he found himself staring at his parents' wings with envy. His father's wings were light blue with darker, grayish blue tips. His mother's wings were vibrant orange, with darker orange – almost red – tips. It wasn't unusual that some soul mates' wings were the complementary color of the other's wing color. Usually that happened when the two shared a deep platonic relationship with each other. His parents were no exception.

Kuroko knew they didn't love each other like most married couples did. Their parents, Kuroko's grandparents, had forced them to marry after they had grown their wings. It was tradition, after all. If the soul mates were of opposite genders, they were to marry, especially if they both belonged to the same social class. Kuroko's parents had only one child and only because the traditions demanded them to have an heir. He was okay with that, though. His parents loved him and they came along with each other well even though they never kissed nor went out for romantic dinners. They loved each other enough to respect each other and their marriage and that was enough.

Kuroko wanted something like that.

He wanted to meet his other half. He wanted to find someone he could talk about anything. He wanted someone he could spend time doing nothing or doing any and everything.

He wanted someone, other than his parents, who would love him unconditionally and whom he could love without ending up with a broken heart.

So he waited.

Patient. Hopeful.

He watched his school mates go through the phases of growing wings. He watched some of them fall in love. But that was okay. Some only met their soul mates when they were adults. It was rare not to have found your soul mate before you turned 21.

Kuroko was patient. He could wait.

Then he turned 16 and his best friend Shigehiro grew his wings when he met a cute girl with dark chocolate brown eyes and Kuroko was not jealous, because it would have been selfish. Selfish to think that despite not having wings, Ogiwara would always be with him. Selfish to think he would always be Ogiwara's best friend.

So Kuroko smiled, added the suffix –kun, on Ogiwara's name again and pretended his heart didn't hurt every time he caught a glimpse of chocolate brown wings, identical to the pair of wings on a back of a stranger, whom Kuroko could not hate because Ogiwara was his friend and it wouldn't be fair-

Then Ogiwara moved away and Kuroko started at Seirin and met Kagami. Kagami had no wings, but once, when they were at the gym playing basketball, Kagami had leaped, higher than ever before, and it had been almost like he was flying. And for a brief second, Kuroko had seen huge brilliant red wings sprouting from his back. Kuroko didn't tell Kagami what he had seen as Kagami had never shared his fascination with wings or soul mates. He tried not to flinch when Kagami slapped his back or ruffled his hair from then on. Because Kagami would never be his and it would only hurt them both if he tried to selfishly make their relationship into something it was not.

When Kuroko turned 19, he had learnt to hide the aching pain in his chest, whenever he caught a glimpse of matching pairs of wings. He no longer flinched when someone from his group of friends complained about pain in their back. He no longer stared enviously at Hyuuga and Riko's matching pair of wings.

Not when someone could see him anyway. But everyone had their limits.

Kuroko came across his, when Kagami had just returned from America and entered the gym with blush dusting his cheeks and those glorious red wings Kuroko had once caught a glimpse of sprouting from his back.

They had finished their practice, Kagami being a tad bit clumsier than usual, due to his new limbs harnessed against his back, as they did to avoid uncomfortable accidents that happened if two people's wings brushed, and Kuroko had volunteered to stay behind to clean up. Kagami had tried to stay and help him, but Riko and Izuki with a worried glances thrown at his direction, had shooed the oblivious redhead from the gym.

Kuroko had cleaned, busying himself by putting away all the equipment and wiping the floor, but once he hit the showers, he had broken down. The warm water had washed away his tears, but even the sound of falling water hadn't been enough to hide the sound of his pain.

When he came out half an hour later, he had come across Kiyoshi, sitting in the locker room while scanning some old sports magazine. Once Kuroko had dressed, Kiyoshi had silently patted at a spot on the bench next to him.

Hesitantly, Kuroko had sat down and kept his eyes on his brand new shoes. For a few long minutes, they sat in silence. Then Kiyoshi shifted a bit in his seat.

"I've always been able to see wings", Kiyoshi stated then. Kuroko, not having expected such confession, lifted his gaze and looked at Kiyoshi, surprised. Kiyoshi was looking right back at him with his gentle brown eyes. Self-conscious of his no doubt buffed, red rimmed eyes, Kuroko turned to look at his lap again.

"You're able to see them too, aren't you?" the taller male asked and Kuroko nodded slowly. From the corner of his eyes, Kuroko saw Kiyoshi nod, as if his suspicions had been confirmed.

"Then you know what people say about people like us. Very few of us ever find soul mates, or grow our own wings. And to be honest, that's okay with me. I've never felt like I need someone like that beside me. Being able to support others… it's always been enough for me and I think it always will be", Kiyoshi said and Kuroko knew he was trying to cheer him up, but his words only managed to make his anxiety worse. He really was an oddball then? For wanting something he would never have. But then Kiyoshi spoke again.

"But you're different, aren't you?" Kuroko stared at the taller male blankly. Then he lowered his eyes again and shrugged. He knew he was selfish and delusional, which certainly made him different from Kiyoshi, but it wasn't something he was willing to admit aloud. Some childish part of him still kept telling him that despite everything, he deserved the same others had. That he deserved to be happy too.

Kiyoshi didn't speak for the moment, obviously waiting for Kuroko's input. But when he didn't get one, he reformed his question: "Tell me, Kuroko, do you want something different? Do you want to find your soul mate?" Kuroko's eyes widened, because it sounded as if Kiyoshi had known what he was thinking.

And that was enough to open the raw, bleeding wound inside him again.

"Yes", Kuroko admitted quietly, his voice breaking, "yes." And despite his best efforts, tears prickled at his eyes again and a quiet sob escaped his throat. Without hesitation, Kiyoshi wrapped his arm around Kuroko and pulled him close enough so the small blue haired boy could bury his face in his shoulder while soft sobs shook his body.

This time it only took a few minutes for him to calm down, though he still didn't push away from Kiyoshi, drawn in by the warmth and just the feeling of another human body beside him. Despite the fact that it wasn't the person he wanted it to be. Kiyoshi was rubbing slow circles on his back and hummed silently before he broke the comfortable silence they had fallen in.

"If you really want for it Kuroko, I'm sure you will find your soul mate too. But you should know, being alone isn't that bad either. You will still have Kagami and me. Riko, Hyuuga, Izuki, Mitode, Koganei… none of them will simply leave us, even if they have found their other halves. Rather, our little family just keeps getting bigger." When Kuroko glanced up at Kiyoshi, he saw the other looking at nothing, his eyes distant, but the smile on his face and gentle look in his eyes told Kuroko that he fully believed in his words. And it was enough to dull the pain and soothe the wound. For now.

Kiyoshi walked him home that day and ruffled his hair. Kuroko frowned as he brushed his fingers through his hair in a futile attempt to tidy it and watched as Kiyoshi walked down the street. The sun was setting and Kuroko had to narrow his eyes against the glare, but despite that, when Kiyoshi stopped to let a car pass him, Kuroko saw it. A pair of wings, even bigger than Kagami's, sprouting from his back. One was deep reddish brown and the other was very light cyan blue. It was the first time Kuroko saw mismatched pair of wings on someone, but he knew immediately what it meant and despite his best efforts, he smiled.

Kiyoshi was already whole. He had no need for another half to complete him. And when the stab of envy reminded him of what he didn't have, he was able to push it aside. He found himself truly happy for his friend.

-O-

When the summer ended, Kuroko started at Rakuzan University. He still felt the ever present hollow spot in his chest, but the wound had scarred over and barely ached anymore. He was beginning to accept the fact that despite not having a soul mate, he could still have close relationships with his friends. Seeing Kagami hang around with his blonde girlfriend, his soul mate from America, still hurt, but he found himself able to feel happy for his friend. He even found himself able to call Ogiwara to catch up, not miding it when Ogiwara enthusiastically told him about his life with his girlfriend.

So when Kuroko entered the Rakuzan University campus, he was doing alright. Even the puppy-like blonde he ended up rooming with, who had bright yellow and gold wings, wasn't enough to lower his mood. Kuroko did get mildly annoyed by the blonde complaining how his wings always got in the way, since he kept forgetting they couldn't actually hit against, well, pretty much anything. Another complicated property the wings had. It did, however, clarify Kuroko to the fact that the blonde, Kise, had only had his wings for a short while.

But the fact he knew about Kise's inexperience of handling his wings also managed to worry him to no end. Especially one beautiful day, when he had been on his way to the library to do some research for an assignment, when he had spotted Kise standing at the edge of the roof, stretching his impressive golden wings. Many students had stopped to watch the eccentric blonde – as he was also a well-known model – as he flapped his wings experimentally, then backed away couple of steps and crouched.

Knowing he had no chances at reaching the blonde in time, Kuroko refrained from trying, and instead watched with wide eyes as the blonde tensed.

"Is he fucking stupid?" Kuroko jumped at the voice coming from right beside him. He turned to see someone with navy blue hair and tanned skin watching incredulously as Kise leapt from the rooftop. The stranger cursed and ran forward and Kuroko had barely enough time to register the very familiar pair of yellow and gold wings before he had to close his eyes against a powerful gust of wind.

When he opened his eyes again he saw the stranger, who could only be Aomine from what Kuroko had been able to conclude from Kise's ramblings, reach the blonde, who was frantically beating his wings as he fell. Aomine managed to get Kise to still his panicked movements, and wrapped himself around the blonde as he spread his wings as wide as he would, which was actually very, very, wide. The duo crashed to the ground forcefully, but thanks to Aomine's skillful handling, neither of them were badly hurt.

Well, Kise had a bruised jaw to go with his bruised ego, as Aomine didn't like to be scared to death by his soul mate's pathetic attempts of flying.

"Do you see what these are? These are fucking down feathers! You can't fly with these you idiot! You need to wait for your primaries to grow in!"

"But Aominecchi already has his primaries! Even though your wings started growing at the same time as mine!"

"It happens, you idiot! It takes more time for some than it does for others!"

Kise had gotten to his feet, when Kuroko interrupted their argument by jabbing Kise between his ribs.

"Kurokocchi! So mean!" the blonde whined with half-faked tears leaking from his eyes. Kuroko stared at him, unfazed.

"You shoulnd't worry us so, Kise-kun. Some thought their favorite model was about to commit suicide", Kuroko stated. He ended up having the blonde cling around his neck while shouting apologies for worrying his precious Kurokocchi, until Aomine forcibly separated him and dragged him off, heading towards the gym.

That had been the first time Kuroko saw someone fly.

-O-

The second time he saw someone fly was far less dramatic.

He had been sitting at a park, reading a book as it was Saturday and so they had no classes, when he had heard a distressed cry from nearby. He then spotted a child, around six or seven years old, crying while staring upwards to the sky. Following the child's gaze he realized the girl had lost her balloon. The balloon had Toothless the dragon decorating it, never mind how ironic Kuroko thought it was to see the balloon fly away without any aid aside from the wind.

It was just the two of them in the park, so Kuroko packed away his book in order to go comfort the child and maybe find her parents, when he felt someone grab his arm. He tensed and turned around to find Takao, one of the few people who ever took notice of him when he entered a classroom, standing beside him. One of the reasons Kuroko remembered the guy was because of the light green wings sprouting from his back. He was one of the two people Kuroko had ever seen with such a peculiar colored wings.

The dark haired male lifted a finger to his lips and pointed at the other side of the park, where Kuroko spotted the other person with green wings. Midorima Shintarou. Kuroko didn't actually share any classes with him, but he was a friend of Kise's. Just when Kuroko was about to ask Takao why it was so important to stay silent, he saw Midorima crouch and spread his wings, before leaping up towards the sky with a powerful whump sound.

Only a minute later, Midorima was already descending next to the awed girl, handing back her balloon. Midorima then turned around, obviously about to leave before the girl could even thank him. That was when Takao seemed to have had enough of silence and dashed forward with a loud: "Shin-chan!" Midorima whirled around and once he spotted Kuroko and Takao, a faint pink color dusted his cheeks.

"Ta-Takao! How long were you there?" Kuroko heard Midorima ask, but deciding he had seen enough, Kuroko had retreated from the park. He had heard Kise call Midorima a huge tsundere, and doubted the green haired man would appreciate having some stranger witness one of his more impulsive and kind actions.

From that day on, when Kuroko came across Midorima at hallways or in the library, the green haired male greeted him with a slight nod. That was unless Takao was around, in which case he would simply scoff at Takao's enthusiastic greeting.

-O-

By the time Kuroko met Murasakibara, he had decided not to wonder about how he seemed to make acquaintances with the strangest of people. Also the best known and apparently most gifted as well. "Prodigies" they called them and according to Kiyoshi, Kagami got much the same treatment at the University he went to. After all, it was uncommon to have so many people able to fly living so near each other, not to mention all of them being the same age.

So it wasn't much of a surprise they got the name "Generation of Miracles", which included three people Kuroko already was in familiar terms with. Kise, Midorima and Aomine had told him about Murasakibara and Akashi. Although, according to their words, Akashi didn't have his wings yet, but since people from his family had always possessed the ability to fly, no one held any doubt Akashi would too. Kagami had already unofficially been dubbed as a member, despite never having met the other "Miracles", while others in the Generation of Miracles seemed to hang out regularly.

So really, taking in the fact Kise already called Kuroko "Kurokocchi", Midorima greeted him when they came across each other and Aomine called him "Tetsu", it wasn't that surprising he came along well with Murasakibara too. Though the cookies probably helped too.

Kuroko had been visiting his friends from Seirin on their Christmas holiday. He had spent the night at Kagami's and his girlfriend's, his soul mate's, place. It had been the first time he met Kagami's half-brother, Tatsuya. He had wings too, grayish mix of yellow and green, with curious lighter green and yellow spots all over. Kuroko had a feeling he had seen similar wings before, only, in different color. Tatsuya had casually mentioned the wings had only started to grow only a few months prior. They weren't as big as Kagami's and he couldn't fly with them like Kagami could, but he could glide and keep himself airborne for couple of minutes.

Kuroko met Tatsuya's soul mate, Murasakibara, when he took a train back to Tokyo. Murasakibara's wings were huge. Bigger than Kuroko had ever seen before. Even folded, the primary feathers dragged the ground. The dragging was bad enough that Murasakibara had to keep his wings half open when walking, much to his annoyance, since it strained his back muscles more. But, as Kuroko found out, if he didn't, Tatsuya refused to give him any sweets. Kuroko realized it had been Murasakibara's wings that reminded Tatssuya's, which should have been obvious as they were soul mates. The only difference was that Murasakibara's wings were purple with spots of lighter purple here and there.

Kuroko had to admit big wings could be useful too, though. It gave Murasakibara a wide berth free of people, since it was considered rude to pass through other people's wings. Not to mention it was highly uncomfortable to have your own wings touch someone else's, unless they were you soul mate. Kuroko had read it was very… intimate gesture and the fact no one wanted to talk about it confirmed his suspicions. He guessed it was for the best only soul mates could touch each other's wings. Anyone else who tried, would only have his hand pass right through the wing, though their wing could still brush against someone else's, but, as Kuroko noted before, it was generally avoided.

Murasakibara had barely offered him any greeting even though Tatsuya smiled warmly at him, before handing a bag of chips to Murasakibara in return for permission to preen his wings. Though, from what Kuroko saw of the way Murasakibara's shoulders relaxing, the preening wasn't as unpleasant as he led to believe. From the fond smile in Tatsuya's face Kuroko figured he knew as well.

They had been only halfway to Tokyo, when Murasakibara had finished with his pockies and made the horrifying realization that he had ran out of snacks. As if to make a point, his stomach had growled loudly at the same time. The pout Murasakibar had showed Tatsuya when he confessed of having no more snacks with him had been almost as impressive as Kise's. With a sigh, Kuroko had reached into his bag and pulled out the vanilla cookies he had gotten from Kagami's soul mate. He had really waited to get to eat them when he reached home, but…

As soon as he had snapped open the box, Murasakibara had turned to look at him with slightly widened eyes. When Kuroko had offered him the whole box filled with delicious looking cookies, Murasakibara had ruffled his hair and stated that "Kuro-chin is actually very nice", much to Tatsuya's amusement. The purple haired giant had even offered him one cookie from the stash Kuroko had given him. Kuroko had glanced to see Tatsuya nodding encouragingly, before agreeing to take one.

The rest of the trip was filled with lighthearted chatting until Murasakibara and Tatsuya got off the train a stop before Kuroko did.

When the glasses started again a week later, Kuroko was surprised to have the purple haired giant join him for lunch at the campus' cafeteria.

-O-

It was curious, how Kuroko's life had entwined with the Generation of Miracles even long before he met the last and best known member, Akashi. It shouldn't have been surprising, though. Akashi was from a well-known family who owned a large company, so Akashi was busy with learning how to take care of business as well as studying and competing in shogi. Kuroko heard from Midorima in passing that Akashi ate his lunch in classroom to spend his time more efficiently.

Sometimes though, he did actually join his friends, the Generation of Miracles, for lunch in the cafeteria. But since they often ate at different times, Kuroko had yet to witness it actually happening. The school year just progressed to spring term when it actually happened while Kuroko was present.

And really, it had been a very normal day. Kuroko had finished with his morning classes and went to the cafeteria for his small lunch. He had already taken out his book, when Murasakibara joined him. They had settled down in comfortable silence as usual.

What was a bit more unusual was that Kise and Aomine both joined them after a few minutes. Murasakibara got dragged into their meaningless squabbles when Kise tried to steal a fry from his plate and almost had his hand stabbed. Midorima had joined them, much to all of their surprise, just in time to stop the bloody fight from happening. Kise had to give up his dessert to make up for the stealing attempt, but Kuroko had offered his own, since he didn't really care for that day's dessert. Kise had clung to him with tears in his eyes to thank him, before Aomine kicked him on the knee to get his attention back.

It had been chaotic, but nice, and for few brief minutes he could almost forget that all his friends gathered around the people had brilliant colorful wings growing on their backs. For few minutes, he could almost forget that he was the only one in the group who would never have someone like Kise was to Aomine or what Tatsuya was to Mursakibara.

Almost.

The light feeling of having no wings on his back seemed almost mocking and Kuroko did his best to not seem like he was hunching and tried to drown himself into the content of his book again. The aching didn't really leave though. It never had and never would.

Until now.

Suddenly a brief silence fell over the group of friends and Kuroko's heart jumped for an unknown reason. He didn't look up yet though, not willing to see the pairs of brightly colored wings.

"Done with the practice match, Akashi?" Midorima's voice broke the silence.

"Yes, it went along a bit faster than I thought, Shintarou", the voice which answered was unfamiliar, but somehow Kuroko felt as if he should know it. Curiously enough, it sent shivers down Kuroko's spine. His heart was beating painfully against his ribs. Kuroko lifted his eyes just in time to see the stranger, Akashi, nod at the rest of the company and sit down.

The chatter started again as Kise snapped a picture of Aomine without the blue haired male noticing before it was too late. Murasakibara returned to eating and Midorima fixed his glasses, but Kuroko couldn't take his eyes off the redheaded male.

He wasn't much taller than Kuroko, and along with his hair, also his eyes were striking red, or, well, the other one was. The other, as Kuroko had heard rumored, was golden yellow. He was dressed in a hoodie and jeans, but somehow looked more regal than most of the students managed. But what struck Kuroko most, was the fact that he didn't have wings, even though Kuroko could swear he had seen him specifically sit down from his left side on order to avoid Murasakibara's huge wings. Kuroko flinched slightly as he re-emerged from his thoughts to see the red headed male looking right back at him, which was surprising, as Kuroko was used to being unnoticed unless he madde an attempt to get someone's attention.

"Ah, I've heard of you from Shintarou and Atsushi, they seem to have high regard of you. Kuroko Tetsuya, right?" Akashi stated and though Kuroko knew the red headed male hadn't really asked anything, he nodded.

"A pleasure to meet you, Akashi-kun", Kuroko responded and was surprised to find his voice slightly breathy. He coughed silently in order to clear it out. Akashi nodded at him and his eyes seemed to linger on Kuroko's form, how Kuroko shifted slightly to his side when Kise's wings flared outwards as Aomine snatched away his phone, before his eyes ran around the others sitting around the table.

"So you can see the wings too, despite not having your own", Akashi mused out loud, much to Kuroko's horror. Kuroko tensed as silence fell over the table. Kise and Aomine glanced from Akashi to him, while Murasakibara barely looked up from his food. Midorima tilted his head curiously, before nodding to himself as if he had just confirmed something.

"That would make sense, I suppose", the green haired male stated and then returned to his food, gently pushing aside the small teddy-bear he was carrying around as his lucky item of the day.

"Kurkokocchi can see our wings? Why didn't you tell me! I even went through the bother of describing them to you", Kise whined loudly and Kuroko cringed at the memory of having to sit through Kise's more-than-lacking descriptions of his and Aomine's matching wings.

"I thought it was funny how you kept dodging Murasakibara's wings when you walked together. You could have told us, Tetsu" Aomine stated simply with a shrug. Murasakibara froze at the mention of his wings, finally looking up from his food.

"Ehh, you won't tell Muro-chin how I've been carrying my wings, will you?" Murasakibara looked so distraught by this notion that Kuroko couldn't help but smile and promise not to tell Tatsuya about all the times Murasakibara had been dragging his wings behind him. Kuroko suspected Tatsuya would know anyway from the shape his primaries were in. In order to divert the conversation from him, Kuroko said the first thing that came to his mind.

"Akashi-kun can see wings too, then?" Akashi smiled thinly at his question and nodded. A tingling feeling appeared on his back, but he didn't have time to respond when Takao emerged from behind Midorima, scaring the green haired male bad enough that he spilled his glass of water. The conversation was forgotten due to the chaos that ensued and soon after that, Kuroko realized his next class was about to start and had to leave the cafeteria.

He refused to look behind him even when he thought he felt a pair of eyes following his as he left the room.

-O-

Kuroko didn't see Akashi again for a while after that. A few days after the lunch they all had together, Kuroko arrived at his and Kise's dorm room late in the evening, rubbing his shoulders. Kise, for once, was there before him, took notice of it and blinked owlishly. He had been preening his wings on the floor, and a stack of golden feathers lay on the floor beside him.

"Kurokocchi has stiff shoulders?" Kise asked, stilling himself from running his fingers through his feathers. Kuroko shrugged slightly and hid a wince.

"My back has just been very stiff for a few weeks now. Nothing to worry about, Kise-kun", Kuroko told him as he shrugged off his coat and kicked off his shoes. Kise's golden eyes didn't leave him yet, though.

"Eh? Why didn't you say anything? I know a few massage techniques that could help!" Kise literally bounced up from the floor and approached Kuroko, who had sat down on his bed, going through his bag, looking for his pencil case. Kuroko shook his head.

"It's fine Kise-kun. It'll pass eventually", Kuroko told him. He felt his bed tip slightly as Kise settled behind him.

"Aw, it won't take long and it'll feel great, I swear!" Kise told him cheerily and one of his hands landed on Kuroko's shoulder. Kuroko flinched and pushed the hand away with a frown.

"I said it's fine, Kise-kun. I don't- " he cut himself off when he saw the confused look on Kise's face, his hand still hovering above Kuroko's shoulder. The blonde then frowned, the rare serious look on his face surprising Kuroko.

"Take your shirt off", Kise ordered sternly. Kuroko frowned, but didn't get to protest, before Kise almost shouted: "Take it off!" Tensing, Kuroko obeyed, mostly because he had rarely seen Kise so upset. They shared the same bathroom and had seen each other in little clothing often enough that Kuroko didn't feel too self-conscious of having to take his shirt off.

The sweater had been a warm cover against the cold winter air, and even though he was inside, he shivered slightly at the chill. Kise pushed on his back to make him turn his back to him and Kuroko almost jumped when the blond ran his hand down his back in some unfamiliar pattern. He seemed to just avoid the aching spots, curiously enough.

"What-" Kuroko was cut off again by the blonde's serious voice.

"Have you been stretching at all? Or done any of the muscle building exercises? I'm sure the nurse gave you one and even if you lost it you should be able to find one fitting for you from the library-" this time it was Kuroko's turn to cut Kise off.

"What are you talking about?" he asked as he pushed himself from the bed pulling on his shirt again. He was frowning, hating to be left out. Kise was looking at him with an odd expression that was a mix of frustration, confusion and worry.

"Your back", Kise stated slowly, "You know we have to keep up with regular training when our flight muscles start to grow. And from what I've seen, you seem to be pretty far along. I wouldn't be surprised to see the feathers start growing in few weeks." For few long seconds, Kuroko could only stare at him blankly.

"Flight muscles", he stated and Kise nodded slowly.

"On my back", he said and finally his brains seemed to make some progress. He had found it curious his shirts had seemed slightly tighter lately, not enough to worry about getting fat, but enough that he noticed. The back ache he had been having for weeks now always seemed worse when he had to put on his backpack.

But otherwise, it didn't make sense. He would never grow his wings, he would never have a soul mate, he didn't have any need for...

"I'm going to grow wings?" Kuroko asked then, his voice soft. Kise looked startled by the tone he used, though Kuroko didn't pay much attention to his reaction. He dashed past the blonde, pulling off his sweater again and turned his back to the mirror in the bathroom. He stared at his back, his mind trying to compare the pictures he had seen of human anatomy and of the way the muscles started growing… His breath got caught in his throat as he followed the muscle lines in his back. They were all in the right place, but they were smaller and… flatter than the ones he had seen in pictures. Most likely because of the lack of proper training and…

A sob escaped his throat, surprising him and interrupting his thoughts. And as if on sign, a single hot tear rolled down his cheek.

"Kurokocchi…" Kuroko didn't turn to see the blonde staring at him, shocked, from the doorway. He only turned away from the mirror when Kise gently grabbed his arm to guide him back to his bed and helped him put his shirt back on. Kise had barely gotten him to sit down when someone knocked on their dorm room door. With an annoyed grunt, Kise dashed across the room to open the door.

Only a second later Aomine pushed his way to the room.

"Yo, Tets-" the way the blue haired male froze as he took in the sobbing and crying form of one of his friends was almost comical. Kuroko made a weak attempt of greeting him, but only managed to make the sobbing louder. It really would have been a humorous scene, Kuroko found himself thinking, if the duo hadn't looked to distressed to see him breaking down.

"Holy… What the hell happened? Did someone do something to you? Did someone hurt you? Who was it? I will-" at that point Kise was kind enough to cut him off and offered him a hushed summary of what had transpired. Aomine frowned, obviously confused, but also worried.

"Should I get someone? Satsuki or…" but Kuroko shook his head vehemently though he was unable stop the tears from leaking from his eyes. Kise looked panicked and ran to the closets, pulling out a blanket with small penguins prints all over it.

"Can you make some hot cocoa?" Kise asked Aomine, his voice and tone frantic as he laid the blanket over Kuroko's shoulders and found himself unable to move as Kuroko wrapped his fingers around his sleeve. Kise settled on the bed, wrapping his arm around Kuroko's shoulders, though he still looked at rather loss of what to do. Aomine nodded numbly and rushed to the small stove across the room.

For the next ten minutes they would hear Aomine swearing as he searched through the closets for a kettle, cocoa powder, mugs…

It took a long while longer even after Kuroko was offered a mug of steaming hot cocoa, for him to calm down enough that the sobs became small sniffs. Only then did Kise and Aomine feel like it was safe to move and they helped now exhausted Kuroko to lie down and covered him with blankets.

Only a minute later Kuroko was asleep.

-O-

The following morning, Kuroko found a note and a strict training schedule on his nighstand, favor from Kise. When Kuroko finished with his classes that day, Aomine came to find him from the library and offered to help him with his muscle exercises.

The day after, Murasakibara offered Tatsuya to teach him preening once his feathers started growing. And only a few days after that, Kuroko even came across Midorima, who, as a medical student, offered to take a look at his back since Kuroko refused to go see the nurse, not to mention a professional doctor.

Kuroko had considered calling Kagami, but decided not to. He still hadn't seen any sign of feathers after all. And despite his suspicions, he had no idea who his soul mate was. He decided he would tell them once he figured it out. And so days became weeks and when Kuroko felt the first signs of itching on his back, almost two months had passed.

He still had no idea who his soul mate was, and suspected he wouldn't know until he saw their wings. He did know who he suspected and he wished they were, but Kuroko hadn't seen Akashi since that one time he had joined them for lunch in the cafeteria. No one from the Generation of Miracles had said a thing either, so Kuroko had no clues to go on.

Two weeks after the dark smoky gray feathers had started growing on his back Kuroko had decided he had had enough. He could already feel the joints growing beneath his skin and a small bone bump had formed under the feathers covering the whole of his upper back.

Kuroko had heard enough rumors to know where to start looking for the elusive red head and so, once he had finished with his classes one Friday evening, he made his way to the part of the campus where they taught business and economy.

He wouldn't deny he was curious as to why Akashi hadn't come to see him, since he should have his feathers growing in as well. After all, Akashi was like him. They had both been able to see others' wings ever since they could remember. They had both been waiting for this long to find their soul mates. The only exception, Kuroko though, would be that, from what Kuroko had heard of the Akashi family, Akashi had known he would eventually find his soul mate and grow his wings.

Perhaps that was why Akashi hadn't gone looking for Kuroko, Kuroko thought to himself, since he had known all along Kuroko was his soul mate. Though for Kuroko, that would have been even a bigger reason to go see him. Why would he, even after finding his soul mate, decide to be alone?

Kuroko slipped inside the building unnoticed by the students leaving to spend their weekends. The advanced economics class was held on Fridays, and Kuroko had previously looked up where the class was located, so he knew where to head to.

He arrived to the right hallway just in time to see the teacher leave the room, though he left the door open. Curious, Kuroko made his way to the classroom door, but slowed down when he heard a familiar voice coming from inside.

"…sure you don't want to go see him? You're already growing out your humerus as is he. I think it's fairly accurate to say now that he really is your soul mate", Midorima finished and Kuroko heard a small clicking sound. He blinked, realizing they were playing shogi. Should he really interrupt them? He didn't exactly want to get caught eavesdropping either…

"I'm sure, Shintarou", Kuroko recognized Akashi's smooth voice. A short silence followed, only interrupted by the clicking sound as they moved their pieces. Kuroko frowned, wondering if he should just go in and apologize for listening in, but stilled again when Midorima spoke.

"And may I ask why that is?" the green haired male asked. Kuroko really should have interrupted them then, but he found himself unable to move. His heart was beating hard as he awaited the response.

"'Why'…?" Akashi asked softly. A short silence followed again, before Akashi continued, "I'm sure I've told you about my father's opinion on this matter and I can't say I completely disagree with him. Having a soul mate of the same gender… I'm sure you understand how that would affect our company's public image." Kuroko's breath hitched and his fingers gripped the strap of his bag hard enough to to his knuckles turn white. He wished he hadn't come here, he wished he hadn't stopped to eavesdrop…

He wished he was misunderstanding the conversation.

"Yes, I'm aware. But don't you think you should talk it through with Kuroko? From what Kise and Aomine slipped, it seems he was in the belief he would never get a soul mate and now…" Midorima was saying. Kuroko knew he should feel offended for Aomine and Kise telling others about his small breakdown, but he forgot all about it as he anxiously waited for Akashi's response.

"And it would have no doubt been better for him to stay in that belief. I have no intention of getting to know him better, as our relationship would have no future. I'm sure you agree it's the logical solution. I've come this far without feeling the need to find a soul mate, I'm sure having wings won't affect my opinion on the matter", for a few seconds, Kuroko forgot how to breathe. The wound that had been slowly closing up over the past few weeks seemed to have been ripped open. His chest hurt and in attempt to gather himself, he briefly lost focus and dropped his bag.

Midorima's voice, which had been talking just a few moments previously, fell silent. Kuroko stiffened at the realization that they had heard him. He picked up his bag and dashed down the hallway, not caring about making noise anymore. As soon as he reached the door, he sped to full sprint, ignoring the prickling feeling behind his eyes.

Really, he had no reason to feel so hurt. He should have considered Akashi's position more. He should have realized. He shouldn't have had baseless expectations on the matter. He knew many examples of some high profile people whom, despite obviously having their wings, never showed up anywhere with their soul mates, though they never married either. He should have been able to connect the dots.

Really, Kuroko knew, the only reason he should have for tears was because of his stupidity. For hoping, for deluding himself that despite everything, he could have the same others had. That he could have what Ogiwara and Kagami had.

Kuroko was panting heavily when he finally reached his dorm. He ignored Takao's cheery greeting in favor of hurrying to his dorm room and locking the door. There, he finally collapsed against the door, before flinching away as it pushed painfully on the bone sticking slightly from his back. With a pained whine he pushed himself further into the room, before stumbling on his knees, utterly spent. His bag lay by the door and for few minutes he stayed on his knees, just breathing. A lonely tear rolled down his cheek and dried before reaching his chin. He closed his eyes in order to focus on calming his whirling thoughts.

For so long, he had wished to find his soul mate. He had though it would make it all better. He had thought it would ease the pain, make him finally feel complete. He had though having his wings growing out would end his loneliness.

He had been wrong.

Now, more than ever, he felt alone. He felt unwanted, a liability. His still growing wings were but painful mockery of what he had wanted, hoped for. With an anguished whine like growl, Kuroko pulled off his hoodie, feeling like he was suffocating. His back arched at the uncomfortable feeling as the fabric pulled on the small feathers growing on his back. He reached at his back, his fingers brushed against the feathers and it hurt. He wished he had been like Kiyoshi.

His fingers curled around a tuft of feathers painfully tight and he wished he had never started growing his wings. His breath shuddered and he closed his eyes fighting against tears. He didn't want to feel like this.

With a pained cry, Kuroko pulled the feathers loose.

Immediately he felt the warm and wet feeling on his back due to the rough treatment. Kuroko curled on himself gripping another tuft of small, soft feathers, still trying in vain to stop himself from hurting so much.

Because even his soul mate didn't want him.

Another cry escaped his lips as more feathers was pulled loose and Kuroko was sobbing and he hated it, he hated feeling so weak and he hated feeling so hurt because he had dared to hope for the same things others had.

His nails dug in his skin painfully.

He really was a freak. Akashi had been just fine without a soul mate. Why could Kuroko not get rid of this feeling of being incomplete? Why was he the only one feeling this way?

The wet sticky feeling of something dripping down his back made him shiver.

He hated how his biggest wish had come true, only to turn into something ugly and cruel. So twisted from what he had really wanted.

How could he have deluded himself so?

He cried in pain as he ripped off the feathers, the reason for his condition. The reason he was hurting and why he had come to fool himself to think… Rough, whining sobs rose from his throat as he tried to get the pain to stop and when he was done, it was already dark in the dorm room. He stayed curled up on the floor, his back covered in dried and fresh blood and missing all the soft feathers he had so adored only hours prior. Now they lied on bloody bundles around him and the white nip of the humerus stuck out through the broken and bloody skin.

Kuroko was still in the same position, sobbing, with silent pained whines escaping him every now and then, when Kise opened the door, having to kick aside the bag Kuroko had dropped in front of the door. Kuroko barely heard the horrified gasp and barely felt it when Kise half carried him to the bathroom and supported him against the wall while the blonde turned on the water and dug out his phone. Few minutes later, Kuroko was soaked and Kise helped him from the shower and made a weak attempt of cleaning his back, before Midorima dashed into the room.

He took one look at Kuroko's back before swearing and telling Kise to get the first aid kit and call Takao. After that, Kuroko could later only recall the pain as someone cleaned and bandaged his back. When he woke up the next morning, he was alone in the room.

There was a glass of water and painkillers on his nightstand along with a note from Midorima which told him not to strain himself and that they would have a talk later, preferably with Akashi along.

Kuroko's breathing hitched as he read over the words and, with his mind made up, he pushed himself from the bed despite the pain. He changed into fresh set of clothes, packed his backpack and left the room, leaving behind a note where he stated he would be visiting his friends for the weekend.

A/N

This was actually supposed to be just a long-ish one shot, but my friend convinced me to split it into chapters. (Though I only split it into two, sorry). The next "chapter" is slightly longer, be warned.

This is only a side note, the real A/N will be at the end of the story.
Enjoy~