Title: The Fox and the Cat
Summary: Kurama Really Doesn't Care For Cats
"Come on in guys," Kuwabarra said, opening the door with his foot to avoid dropping the paper bags in his arms. Behind him, Yusuke and Kurama carried one bag each, exchanging amused glances. They'd had to convince the taller man to even let him do that, insisting 'real men didn't need help carrying anything!' But, he'd surrendered when he'd dropped the milk, dented a can of cat food, not to mention the now broken jar of pickled plums lying in the store's parking lot...
"Sorry about the mess," he called from the kitchen. "It's fine," Kurama said softly, toeing off his shoes and smiled at the not-very-messy apartment.
"What are you talking about," Yusuke teased, "This is the cleanest I've seen it in a month! Why, it's practically sparkly!"
"Oh shut up Urameshi," Kuwabarra grumbled setting bags on the counters and pulling items out to categorize, "Oh, take a seat, guys. You want a soda or something?" Yusuke was already in the fridge, taking a beer. Kurama just smiled politely, taking a seat, crossing his legs and folding his hands over one knee, "I'm fine, thank you. Would you like some help? While I admit I don't know where everything goes, I think I can manage not to put the flour in the oven."
"Nah," he snorted, rolling his eyes at the sound of a beer top cracking, "Really, Urameshi? Its not even one o clock yet!" "Who cares, it's the weekend," he took a healthy swig, grinning, "and besides, you owe me for the beer you polished off at my place."
"...oh. Right. Good point," Kazuma looked at the ceiling, then shook his head, "Forgot about that...now, which bag has the cat food..."
As if summoned by the word 'food', a small calico appeared from around the corner, rubbing against the wall happily. She mewed, rubbing against Yusuke in greeting, "Hey there fur ball." The Mazukou picked her up with a grin, chuckling when she tapped his cheek with her paw, "Damn, you're getting fat!"
At this, Kuwabarra's head popped out from behind the door, "Hey she is not! She's just fluffy! Aren't you baby?" he smiled fondly, opening a cabinet and pouring a glass of soda for himself.
"You sure you don't want anything, Fox boy?" he looked over at the quiet redhead, "If you don't want alcohol like SOME people," he shot a look across the table , the recipient toasting him in response, "There's juice. Or I can make some tea. Oh, milk...but I guess you don't like milk..."
"Jeez, Kuwabarra, play house wife much?" Yusuke teased.
"It's CALLED being a good host, you ass. You should try it sometime!"
Kurama just smiled in response, "I'm fine, honestly. Don't go to any trouble," his smile faded as the cat came over to him, meowing and bumping her head against his leg in greeting, "...hello Eikichi," he said in an abnormally deadpan voice. Kuwabarra didn't seem to notice. "AWWW she says hello! She normally doesn't come up to strangers." He dumped some food in a tiny bowl decorated with fish skeletons.
"Huh...she usually comes running," Kuwa mumbled, "She must really like you."
"Hm," Kurama cleared his throat, leaning forward and nudging her a little, "Go on now," he mumbled, "Stop that. You are getting fur all over my black pants..."
"You're such a girl," Yusuke suggested, ignoring the deadpan look he got from both his friends.
"Oh hush," the Yoko said, "my mother happens to be allergic." This was, of course, a lie, "And besides-geh!"
His companions busted up laughing at the unusual sound that burst from their normally poised teammate. He, however, took no notice. Kurama sat rigidly with his hands up, with an expression close to a glare. "Kazuma," he sat rigidly with his hands up, with an expression close to a glare. "Kazuma," he said stiffly, "Would you please come get This cat?"
"Oh come on, it's not like she's heavy. Just set her on the floor."
Yusuke could have sworn he saw Kurama's left eye twitch. He sneered a little, picking her up gingerly under the armpits (err, legpits?) and setting her on the floor. She blinked slowly, as if confused, and hopped lightly back onto his lap, purring.
"Awww, Fox boy, I wish I had my camera," Yusuke laughed.
"Cat," Kurama said, "Get off me."
"Meow."
Kuwabarra was about to make another remark about making friends, but was stopped short by a very, very alien sound that emerged from his normally elegant companion.
Kurama hissed. Loudly. And were his canines sharper...?
Eikichi jumped down, lowering herself and growling low in her throat. Yusuke and Kuwabarra just watched, wide eyed, as the two stared intensely at one another. She hissed.
He hissed.
She let out a low growling noise.
His was louder, deep in his chest.
...And then she ran.
It was Yusuke who broke the awkward silence with a loud guffaw, "The Fuck was that about?!"
Kurama stood up, casually brushing fur from his pants, "I do not care for cats," he nodded, back to his thankfully normal and composed self, "I really must be going. Farewell."
He spun on his heel, hands brushing off his arms as if trying to rid himself of invisible dirt. The door clicked shut.
"...well," Kuwabarra blinked, "let's put that under the category of God Damn weird..."
Yusuke just laughed, shaking his head, "Hey, foxes are canines, after all. You know what they say about cats and dogs..."
END
I have no idea where this came from. Just popped up at 4:00 in the morning. Hope you enjoyed my odd humor. :)