A Million Miles Apart

A/N: Alright, next chapter is finished! And a lot faster this time! This chapter was really easy to write, which is a nice change. I hope you'll like the chapter and please review, favorite and follow!

Chapter 73, Stupid With Love

As it turned out, caring for Moriah came with a few too many restrictions for my liking. Donnie, the Professor and Traximus were very clear on me not ever touching her or actually getting too close to her and my only real tasks were to bring her food and water while making sure she wouldn't get up to any trouble.

Not exactly the karmic retribution I had been hoping for, but hey, it was something! And it was better than letting Mona or Donnie or, Aeons forbid, Starlee look after her. So I would take it, if only to make sure that Starlee wouldn't get manipulated into feeling bad for her. I wouldn't put it past her to try and use Starlee's vulnerability and naivety against her to try and gain her favor. She had done worse things.

So here I was, making my way towards the cell with a tray laden with a sandwich and a bottle of water in hand, a scowl on my face that grew harsher and harsher as I got nearer

Moriah was sitting in the corner of her cell with her legs drawn up to her chest, arms resting on her knees, her green eyes dull and staring straight into the wall in front of her. Her wild red hair draped around her body like a blanket.

She didn't even acknowledge me as I entered the room and came to stand just feet away.

I stood there for a full minute, staring down at her as she kept her eyes locked on the wall, devoid of life or light and her face entirely blank. I groaned quietly and rolled my eyes, clutching the tray a bit tighter before kneeling down and placing it on the floor, ready to open the small hatch to allow the tray to slide into the cell, when I heard her speak.

"So… I gather you've come to hear my answer."

Her voice was low, almost inaudible, but she was still very clearly talking to me. I pursed my lips and bit my tongue so I wouldn't curse, then took a calming breath. "If you have one to give me, I suppose I have."

Moriah snorted mirthlessly and one corner of her mouth twitched ever so slightly, in what could almost be the beginning of a small smile. "Well, I suppose it's better than the alternative to stick around here, isn't it?" She laughed again. "Heh, it's a bit ironic, isn't it. It used to be me on the other side of the wall, trying to get you to talk to me… and you having none of it." She shook her head with a dead-eyed smile, her hair draping in front of her face like a curtain. "Oh, how the tables have turned."

I scoffed disgustedly, folded my arms over my chest. "If I recall correctly, I was kept prisoner in our own home because our father," I made sure to practically spit out the word with as much disgust and hate as I could muster, "didn't like me. I was being treated like a dirty secret. And the few times you actually bothered to talk to me, you just kept trying to convince me to join his side- because 'family!'" I raised both hands, holding up two fingers and curling them twice, repeating a gesture I had seen Donnie do a few times when mocking someone's else's words.

Moriah finally looked up at me, still resting her arms on her knees, but her eyes had a bit more life in them now as she suddenly looked offended.

"Well, what in the everlasting Aeon was I supposed to do? Love him or hate him, he's our father! If I had stepped out of line like you did, he would have seriously hurt us both! What would that have helped?"

I growled again and folded my arms, digging my nails so hard into my flesh I almost started to bleed. It was all I could do to keep from storming in there and beating her to a pulp.

"We still would have had each other's backs! We could have left together and found a different life somewhere else and been free of his abusive ass! Hell, we might still have been friends if you'd stayed in my corner. But I guess your loyalty to that sorry excuse of a general was more important to you."

Moriah's face scrunched up with anger and something else that I couldn't quite pinpoint- pain, maybe? She shifted so she sat on her knees and could look right at me.

"It wasn't like that, Jhanna! You think I liked watching him treat you like that? Or how he hurt you that day? But I was twelve years old at the time, what was I supposed to do? I did everything I could do to make sure he wouldn't hurt you or Starlee any more than he already had! I did everything I could to draw his attention away from you because I didn't want him to hurt you! Why do you hate me for that?"

Looking at her indignant face was taking all of my willpower. "Yeah, and look how well that turned out. I guess all of that meant you could just stop talking to me and treat me like I was invisible all of a sudden? I guess it was too much to ask for you to descend from your throne to mingle with us mere mortals? At least here I have friends who don't treat me like dirt."

Moriah rolled her eyes dramatically and with so much disgust that I was almost impressed. "Oh please, Jhanna, you cannot afford to be this naive! That disrespectful boy is a reptile; he will be nothing but trouble. He's already getting both of you involved in a war and will get you all killed if you don't leave while you still can!"

"Oh for fuck's sake," I snarled, "stop that fucking 'reptile' talk already! It's disgusting and demeaning and all kinds of wrong! These guys are my friends and Donnie needs my help so he can save his planet from being fucking destroyed! You'll have to excuse my wanting to help my friend save his world rather than go back to a father who doesn't give a fuck about me."

She pursed her lips wryly and tilted her head. "Oh, I think it's a little more than 'friend'. At least to you." She folded her arms over her chest and looked at me with so much disapproval. "I saw the way you looked at him during that party. The way you danced together. You think I don't see what's actually going on here? The things you feel for him?"

I felt my stomach drop right out of my feet and stared at her, not sure if I was shocked or enraged by her spying on me during a very personal and emotional moment. But hey, her disapproval hadn't meant anything to me for years, so why should it now?

So I just glared back at her and clenched my whole body so I wouldn't punch anything. "Oh, you do, do you? Okay, yes, I admit it: I have a crush on Donnie. So what? He's a very good and sweet and genuine guy and all he wants is to save his planet. He doesn't care about glory or fame or anything like that, he just wants to do the right thing. And, get this: he actually cares about all of us." I paused and looked down into my lap, fighting back a smile. "He cares about me."

Moriah scoffed and rolled her eyes. "Yeah, or so he claims."

I snapped my head up and fixed her with a loathing look. Oh, suddenly she knew anything about truly caring for someone, did she? "He cares way more than you do. All you've ever done for me or Starlee is shut us out and leave us to fend for ourselves- or to be fucking abused!"

She winced and drew back from me, but I was done listening to her BS. My friends were still out in the dining room and I'd much rather sit there and talk with them than with my older sister. So I just pressed the button, opened the hatch and shoved the tray through before closing it and getting back to my feet.

"Enjoy your lunch, bitch."

And I stomped towards the door without looking back. I had nothing more to say to her. But evidently she was not finished because just as I reached the doors and they opened for me, I heard her speak, her voice low and gentle but still clear as a bell.

"He's going to hurt you, Jhanna. They always do. I saw the look in his eyes that night. There is so much beneath the surface that you haven't seen yet. Be careful with your heart, or it's going to break."

I looked back at her, sneered and shook my head, then left the room.

Jhanna came stomping into the dining room with steam practically pouring out of her ears. Her cheeks were flushed a dark purple and her face was twisted in a scowl, which was all we needed to see in order to understand her little trip Moriah's cell had gone about as well as could have been expected.

Mona looked up from the book she was reading and I glanced up from the floor where I was doing push ups with Starlee sitting on my shell for added weight- that part hadn't really been my idea, but she had insisted on helping me with training since I was helping her, so I allowed it. It was nice to feel that I'd grown stronger, as it wasn't anywhere near as tough as I'd feared it would be. (Well, it was either that or Starlee was unbelievably light, but whatever.)

Jhanna came to an abrupt stop a short distance away, practically fizzling with rage. "I can't believe her! She is totally trying to play the sympathy card and acting all nice and sweet now that we have her locked so I will forgive her! As if all the years of not talking to me and treating me like garbage suddenly never happened! As if she was the one who kept trying to be close as sisters and not me!"

She wasn't quite yelling, but it was very close, and she was moving around the room, seemingly unable to stand still for more than a few seconds at a time. Her anger kept her moving around like a restless tiger in a cage.

"And, you know, she has the gall to say, 'all I've ever been doing, I did for you and Starlee. What was I supposed to do, let all of us be hurt by dear old Dad, or what, be a caring and nice sister for once? Oh, what could I do? I was just trying to do the right thing.'"

Her voice was so full of loathing that I couldn't help the loud and somewhat scornful cackle that escaped my lips even as I kept doing my push ups. "Hah! And what exactly is that supposed to mean?"

I looked up for a brief moment, saw Mona put her book aside and turn to Jhanna, and then looked down again.

"Maybe, in her mind, she was doing what she had to do to protect you?" she suggested, playing Devil's Advocate. "Your dad isn't exactly the nicest guy... maybe she just wanted to make sure you wouldn't get hurt any worse than you already had been?"

Jhanna scoffed loudly and stomped over the couch, sat down and crossed one leg over the other, folding her arms over her chest. She looked very much like a pouty child.

"Yeah right, and I'm an Aeon. Even if it was true and she did think that, it doesn't make everything she has done to us right. She can preach on and on about doing what she thought was right, but she's still a terrible bitch and she can go f-"

I turned my head and cleared my throat loudly and pointedly before gesturing with my head at Starlee, who was still sitting on my shell, and Jhanna closed her mouth and bit her lip, looking away.

Speaking of Starlee, she had been very quiet this whole time, and if I hadn't been able to feel her weight and if she hadn't occasionally shifted a bit on my shell to sit more comfortably, I wouldn't have been surprised if she had left the room. I looked up and tried to twist my neck so I could see her, but only caught a glimpse of purple and magenta in my peripheral vision. "You okay, Star?"

I heard her sigh and then shift, getting up from my shell and standing up, skating over the couch to sit next to her sister.

"I don't know. I mean, I know she's done a lot of terrible things, but I still… I don't know, I guess I wanna know exactly what's going on in her head and see what she means with all of this. But at the same time, I don't want to have anything to do with her anymore. Not after what she did the other day."

I sat up on my knees and stretched out my back while looking over at Starlee, who, with her drooping braids and big eyes, looked very much like a kicked puppy. I felt so bad for her because, once again, I was reminded of just how young she still was compared to the rest of us. While Mona was seventeen and close to being an adult, and Jhanna and I at sixteen were close, Starlee was thirteen and had barely reached puberty yet. She was very much a child and had seen her world crumble so many times in such a short time since she joined this mission that I felt like such a bad guy for putting her through all this.

Jhanna saw it too, and very quickly pushed her anger aside and put her arms around her sister, pulling her into a tight hug and letting her bury her face in her shoulder. She didn't say anything, just held her and comforted her. Starlee didn't seem to be crying but she clung to Jhanna and kept her face hidden.

Mona and I shared a look; she gestured her head at Jhanna, who was still tense with anger she hadn't released yet, and I understood what she meant. Even though she might have put it aside for the moment for her sister, Jhanna still needed to let it out. And the best way to do that was for her to do something physical- her favorite way to handle things.

And Mona and Starlee at this point had a very close relationship and Mona would be more than capable of comfort and advice- even better so than Jhanna in some ways. So she could very easily take over making sure Starlee was okay and I could take care of making sure Jhanna would calm down.

Said and done, as soon as Jhanna and Starlee pulled away from each other, I got up and slowly made my way to the couch with a small smile.

"Hey, Jhanna, you wanna spar some? I've been practicing some new moves with Traximus and I wanna try it on someone else."

That was half true. I had been practicing hard for weeks now and it was always nice to try new moves on someone else for a change. But if Jhanna understood what I was doing here, she was kind enough not to call me out on it. She just gave Starlee one last squeeze before getting up with a smirk.

"Sure; I'm always up for a good fight. I just hope you realize that I'm going to wipe the floor with your shell." I smirked back at her, arms folded over my chest. Oh, how I enjoyed this banter between us- much more than I thought I ever would.

"Oh, I wouldn't be so sure about that. I've gotten a lot better since that first day we met, you know. If anything, I might just be wiping the floor with your face instead."

She cackled and pushed past me, grabbing her sword from the table.

"Dream on, Shellhead! You know I'm the best fighter on the team. But sure, you can try."

I grabbed my staff and followed her to the holo-dojo. But before I entered the room, I turned around to look at Starlee and Mona, who were now sitting together and talking softly to each other.

I smiled softly and then walked into the holo-dojo. Yeah, they were going to be alright.

I always felt better after a good, long training session. It was always the best way to release pent-up stress, anger or pain, and that feeling of tiredness in my whole body was incredibly satisfying.

Though today's little sparring session was a bit more distracting than it usually was, because sparring with Donnie made me think back to that night when we danced together at that party before everything had gone to shit. So when Donnie blocked my sword with his staff, or the other way around, I would sweat in ways I knew wasn't because of the hard training. I felt myself nearly slip up several times and my heart was racing so hard I almost thought I'd pass out.

But I managed to get through the sparring match without making myself look too stupid, still dripping with sweat and out of breath as we made our way out the holographic chamber. There was also a strange, fluttering feeling in my stomach that I didn't know how to describe.

Donnie smirked as he sat down on the couch, wiping his forehead with a towel. "Well, I think we all know who won that match, Jhanna. You were really off your game today." His tone was teasing and light, but the comment made the fluttering in my stomach worse and I had to take deep breath before I trusted myself to speak with the same kind of teasing tone that I always used around him.

"Pfft, yeah- dream on, Donnie. I was just going easy on you and you know it!"

He shook his head amusedly. I swallowed thickly and sat down on the couch beside him, making sure to keep a safe distance from him but still being close enough.

I drew my hands through my sweaty hair and tried to breathe normally, making a show of stretching out my back and arms and shoulders, trying my hardest not to stare as he raised a bottle of water to his lips and drank, a few small streams of water running down his face and neck.

I licked my lips and turned away, keeping my eyes locked on my lap, swallowing and trying to breathe, because wow, was it actually getting hotter in here or was I really that sweaty? I reached for my own water bottle and took a huge gulp in an effort to cool myself down.

Seriously, how was something like this even possible? How was it, that after everything I had seen and been though, after everything that I had used to toughen myself up and make my skin thicker, that a guy could make me tongue-tied and lose any and all intelligent thought? I had never considered myself the kind of girl who'd swoon or fall for anyone. I had always said I was stronger and smarter than that, and yet here I was, feeling breathless and with a racing heart simply from being in his proximity.

Something like that shouldn't be possible, but it somehow was, and I was still grappling for any sense of stability in these new feelings.

"Seriously, are you okay?"

I jumped a little as I heard him speak, my head snapping in his direction, and I found myself being gut-punched by his big concerned eyes.

"What?" was the only thing I could get out, cursing myself for how squeaky I sounded, but Donnie just kept looking concerned.

"I know we talked about this, but if you're still mad at me about letting Moriah stay here, then I feel that we should talk about it."

Wait, was he still hung up on that? Well, at least he wasn't seeing through me and my feelings- but I didn't want him to think I was still mad.

I shook my head and tried to smile reassuringly. "No, no it's nothing like that. We're fine, you know we are. It's just…" I trailed off and shrugged. "She makes me so mad, you know? She spent years treating me like the dirt on her shoe, after years of us being so close, and suddenly now she tries to talk to me like an actual humanoid being. Like, too little too late, Sis."

Donnie huffed and nodded self-deprecatingly. "Yeah, I know what you mean. I had a brother and a friend who kept treating me like their own personal punching bag or supporter, respectively. He kept pushing me around and bullying me for years and yet claimed 'we're brothers and I love you' despite rarely showing it in any meaningful ways. And she kept coming to me with her problems and yet never seemed interested in hearing about mine."

Wait, what? 'She'? But he had only ever mentioned one girl that he knew close enough to be friends with. So, did that mean...?

I turned to him, lifting one leg up on the couch and moving so I could look him in the eye. "But wait, didn't you say that the one girl you knew was a girl you really liked? The love of your life? And yet you say she treated you like that?"

He shrugged and turned away. "Yeah, I guess. I was so blown away by her from the moment I first saw her. She was so kind, and beautiful and awesome and I tried every possible thing I could think of to impress her- but I guess all I ever managed to do was make a huge fool of myself." He met my eyes and I gasped softly when I saw tears there. "And yeah, April was nice for the most part, but so many times I think she was just humoring me; she never told me whether or not she liked me like that- or at all, really. Also there was the time she blamed us for her father getting mutated- which is fair, that was our fault- yet it felt more like she shoveled most of it on my shoulders. Like it was somehow all my fault, despite her knowing I would never hurt her like that."

I stared at him, trying to push this new anger away. I had never met this April girl before and had only caught a glimpse of her when I saw Donnie watch his family on Pluto Khan's tablet, but I suddenly knew I really didn't like her. Not one bit.

But that wasn't what was important at the moment. Donnie had clearly cared a lot about her and had had his heart broken when he saw her kiss someone else, so there were clearly some strong feelings involved here.

So I just scooted closer to him and placed an arm around his shoulders. He smiled softly at me and laughed bitterly, blinking away the tears in his eyes.

"I guess it's on me, though. Whenever I was around her I kept trying so hard to be someone… cool, I guess." He scoffed and rolled his eyes again, very self-deprecatingly, but I wasn't having it.

"You're already cool- look at everything you've been doing and have done since you landed on D'hoonib! You're awesome."

He smiled bashfully and looked a bit awkward. "Heh, thanks." He didn't sound to me like he quite believed me, which was aggravating, but hey, not the point at the moment. He shrugged again and pursed his lips. "But, hey, I guess that's what love does to you. You try so hard to impress and please and be everything, but probably just end up looking stupid."

His words weren't aimed at me, I knew they weren't, but I bit my lip and looked away from him as I heard them. Donnie was speaking from his own experiences, I understood that, but it hit a little too close to home for now.

I swallowed, took a breath and then turned back to him, trying to look undeterred. "Well sure, but there's one thing I don't understand here. You say that she was nice and beautiful, but you didn't like a lot of the same things, if any; you made a lot of effort but she didn't; she didn't always treat you that well, went on about herself and didn't listen to you."

He nodded.

I moved a little closer, now only inches away. "Then why do you like her?"

He snorted indignantly and smiled, almost condescendingly, shaking his head. "Pfft, why do I like her?"

The question sounded rhetorical, so I just raised my eyebrows expectantly. He suddenly looked a bit hesitant and doubtful as he tried to come up with an answer but seemed to come up flat.

He shook his head again, tried to smile again, less smug and more hesitant. "Why do I like her?" He sounded less sure, but still trying so hard to seem like he knew what he was going to say next.

I just looked at him, trying not to look pitying or judging or condescending, but I could practically see every argument of why he likes this girl completely fall apart on his face as the cockiness fell off his face and left an empty, vague look behind. When he finally looked me in the eyes, there was only confusion and a bit of distress as he asked, "...Why do I like her?"

"Yeah, that's what I asked."

He looked away, staring off into space as he leaned back against the couch. "Huh." He shook his head and this new epiphany had obviously floored him. Then he snorted. "Heh, and to think of all the time I wasted, trying to get her to like me when I don't even know why. But, like I said, that's what love does to you." Then he groaned and threw his head back. "Damn, is this frustrating. Why does it have to make such little sense?"

I snorted and smirked, bumping his shoulder. "What, you're asking me?"

He chortled and glanced over to me, then sighed, sitting up straight, resting his elbows on his knees and his face in his hands.

"I shouldn't even bother, though. I mean, love is such a complicated and frustrating concept. I should swear off it."

Well... shit.

He kept going. "Like, I know I'm smart and can figure out mostly everything, but love just… I guess I'm stupid with love."

'Well, that makes two of us.'

"I just don't think I'll ever really get it or understand it," he said, looking old and weary. I looked away, trying to think of something to say without giving away my feelings, because it was obviously not the best time, but I felt like I had to say something.

I took a deep breath, trying my hardest to appear sympathetic and not pitying, and placed an arm around his shoulders.

"Well, if that's what you wanna do, knock yourself out. But you're not on Earth anymore, and your options aren't really that limited now. Maybe you could find some other girl out here. Like, there's a lot of stars in the sky."

He studied me incredulously, like he couldn't imagine anyone giving him that kind of advice. Then, albeit hesitantly, he smiled softly.

"You really think so? You think I could meet...The One?"

I smiled lazily, fighting against the jealousy that appeared like an unwelcome guest at the thought of him liking other girls. "Sure. Just don't waste too much time thinking of that April girl. If she couldn't appreciate everything you did and what a great guy you are, then hey, that's her problem. If you ask me, it sounds like she really missed out."

He stared at me, a little misty-eyed, and then grinned widely. "Yeah, I guess you're right." Then he grabbed me in a quick but tight hug. "Thanks, Jhanna. You're a great friend."

Then he got up and grabbed his towel. "I'm going to grab a shower. You coming with?"

But I was too floored by the sudden gesture of affection that I could barely remember my own name. I eventually managed to mutter that I would join him in a second and he left the room in better spirits, not looking so heartbroken anymore.

I sighed loudly as I leaned back against the couch, almost feeling the need to pinch myself or fan my face with my hand, just to make sure I was still alive and that this had happened. My head felt light, like it had lifted from my shoulders and was up in the sky somewhere high above me.

Because, hey, he seemed to be more or less over that April. And he seemed totally fine with that. Which meant that soon I would be able to make a move. Soon, but not yet. That would be too soon and also might make my words seem manipulative and like I was trying to gain his favor. Or worse- that I was mocking him.

Besides, he couldn't have gotten feelings for me yet anyway.

I would have to be fine with being his friend for a little bit longer, but subtly try to make myself eligible as well as make it clear I wanted more without tossing it in his face.

So yeah, I could be his friend. I could be his best friend; that was fine with me. Because Donnie was a great guy and I was lucky to get this far.

For now.

A/N: Done! Finally some nice Donnie and Jhanna moments again. I really like writing these two and I hope you like reading about them.

Thank you so much for reading my chapter, I really hope you liked it and please review, favorite and follow!