November 2019

I step off the elevator making my way to my office, pausing just outside my door to check in on Will. He's in the conference room with my least favorite client, John Sutton.

Will was supposed to be in court with me this morning, but Sutton called and insisted the meeting they had scheduled for this afternoon, be moved to this morning. Will would never bend over backwards for any other client the way he does for Sutton. Answering at his every beck and call. It's not like Will. But Sutton is unlike any other client we've had.

I can see in Will's features he's had enough. The way he squeezes his pen, balls up his fist. This tension is his way of dealing with the anxiety when he's in Sutton's presence. He may need a professional to work out the knots that have likely formed in his upper back. My hands probably won't do the trick.

I think about interrupting. Going in there and announcing that Will has a call that can't be missed. But if I were to go within fifty feet of Sutton Will might completely lose it. He's forbidden me from joining him on any of Sutton's cases. I never thought I'd see the day where Will would put his foot down and not budge even a millimeter with me. We have long since moved past the argument that ensued after that conversation. I know it's his way of trying to protect me, but I don't like it. It's time to insist we no longer represent this client.

I've had enough of Sutton, and the power he holds over Will. Therapy has helped him deal with, cope with, the PTSD this man caused him. But the only way for Will to truly heal is to cut of all contact with Sutton. Get him completely out of our lives. Will's been telling me for weeks that he has a plan to get out from under Sutton's foot, but I've seen no progress. So, I'm taking things into my own hands. Everything may come crashing down in a ball of flames by the end of the day, but this has to end.

The meeting finally wraps up fifteen minutes later. I watch Sutton and his men step onto the elevator. I grab my coat and purse.

"Tell Will, I had some errands to run. I'll be back in an hour," I say to my assistant.

She only nods and gets back to work.

As I press the button for the entrance level I hope I'm not too late. I scan the people and vehicles in front of the building as I step outside into the cold November air. I'm about to give up hope, but then I spot Sutton down the street. He's about to get into his car.

"Mr. Sutton," I holler, hurrying towards his car.

A big burly man stands in front of the open car door, preventing me from seeing him. "It's okay Mike," Sutton says.

The large man moves out of my way.

"Mrs. Gardner, what can I do for you?" he asks, in a smooth, charming voice. This guy is so friendly, so calm and collected, I'd have no qualms speaking to him if I didn't know who he was or what he did for a living.

I swallow trying to calm my nerves that are threatening my stomach to rebel. "I was wondering if we could talk for a few minutes?"

"I'm on my way to lunch. Why don't you hop in? We can talk on the way."

I hesitate. If Sutton doesn't do away with me, Will, will definitely consider it when he finds out what I'm about to do. "Sure," I respond, with a tone of confidence that I don't feel.

He moves over making room for me. There's no going back now. I'm trapped. I'm doing this for my family I try to remind myself.

"It's Alicia isn't it? I'm sorry we haven't had the pleasure of working together. What can I do for you? Did I forget to sign one of the contracts?"

"No. Listen, sir, I'm just going to get right to the point. Our firm can't represent you anymore. I have called around to a few of the other top firms in the city and they are all willing to take on your business. I have a list of those firms right here." I hand him the list with five names on it. "Any one of these firms is more than capable of taking care of you. Their billing fees are compatible with ours." I hold my breath. This could go very wrong at any moment.

His dark green eyes stare at me with a look that would cause anyone to cower. Inwardly I'm a wreck. But I've perfected the art of showing stability and confidence over the years. I only hope it shows.

"Why," he said. "Why can't you represent me anymore? And why didn't your husband discuss this with me when I was in your office?"

"Because, he had another meeting to get to. It's come to my attention that we have a few clients with a conflict of interest. Client's who've been with us for a number of years. I'm sure as a businessman you can understand loyalty to your longtime associates. We value loyalty at our firm. I've gone over the conflicts a dozen times, and I can't find a legal way for us to keep all of you. You aren't the only client we're moving away from. I hope you understand." It's only a partial lie. We are in the process of terminating business with a few clients, but it has nothing to do with him.

He doesn't respond. I'm getting more nervous with every passing minute. I pull another sheet of paper from the file I brought along.

"This is an end of services contract. It's really just a formality, but I need you to sign it. It will relinquish our responsibilities once all the paperwork from today's deal has been signed and recorded. Will should have everything completed by the end of the day."

He puts a hand to his chin, contemplating what to do next. He takes the sheet of paper from my hand.

"I think you're lying to me," he says. "If you had clients with a conflict of interest, you would have brought it up months ago." He leans a little closer. I clasp my hands together to keep them from trembling.

"No, sir. If you'll recall eight months ago you made it fairly clear that we didn't have a choice in representing you. The kidnapping of my husband and all. But over those eight months we have provided you with exceptional service and representation. My husband drops everything else when you need his help. We have managed to keep those conflicts with our other clients at bay during those months, but we can't do that anymore. One of our other clients is in the process of becoming heavily involved in one of your companies, and it's going to cause issues if we represent both of you." This is also a partial truth, but it could be exploited in all the wrong ways if I were to ever have to testify to the validity of this conversation. He isn't buying it, I can see from the look in his eyes.

"You don't like me, do you, Alicia? You don't approve of some of my less legitimate business dealings? You haven't forgiven me for taking your husband away for a few days last March, and you'd rather not have your firm associated with my name. Am I getting closer to the real reason you want me to sign this contract?"

I swallow, telling myself to breathe. "Yes," I reply, honestly, in a firm tone. The truth is I wouldn't mind representing him, if it hadn't been for what he did to Will. I mean our firm still represents Lamond Bishop. But I'm not about to give away that the real reason I want him gone, is so the man I love will stop having nightmares.

"Turn the car around. We're going back," he says, to his driver. "I make your husband nervous, don't I?" His attention is back on me.

"No," I lie, but respond, with conviction. "You agitate him. But you're not the only client who gets under his skin." Another lie, but I'm not about to admit to him the strain he puts Will through every time he walks into our office.

"He doesn't know you're with me right now does he?"

"Yes, he does. I already told you he had to get to another meeting and asked if I would try to catch you before you left." I haven't ever lied so much in my entire professional career. But to protect Will, I'd lie a thousand more times.

He reaches out and grabs my arm. I inhale. "Don't lie to me," he says, angrily. "He hasn't let you near me since that night I brought him back to you. He's afraid of what I might do to you. As he should be," he emphasizes. "He's a tough, no nonsense lawyer. Nothing gets in his way professionally. I know. I've seen him work, in and out of court. But he has a weakness, and that's you. He'd do anything for you. He'd die for you. That's the real reason you're here. You're tired of worrying about what I might do to him again."

He's hit the nail on the head. I yank my arm from his grasp. I really feel sick now. "Yes," I admit. "I don't like associating with people like you. And no, I didn't take lightly to your torturing my husband. I'd never go to the police about that situation because Will and I would both end up dead. But I've had enough. Will has been loyal to you for eight months, against my wishes. Now it's time for you to move on." I figured being brutally honest wasn't any worse than lying or telling him a portion of the truth. Either he'll punish me for it, or he won't. But I am done letting this man control aspects of my life.

The car stops in front of the office building. "Well Mrs. Gardner, let's go see what your husband has to say about all of this." We exit the car. This is not going to be good. Will, is not going to take this well. I silently hope he left the office to find some lunch.

No such luck. The door to his office is open. He's sitting back in his chair with, notepad in hand, looking at his computer screen. Both our assistants look up as I walk past them into Will's office followed by Sutton and two of his men.

When Will looks up and sees us, he bolts up out of his chair. One of Sutton's men closes the door to his office.

Will balls his fists. He look like a lion ready to attack. "Alicia, are you okay?" he asks, his eyes remain focused on Sutton.

"I'm fine," I say, with slight hesitation.

"Mr. Sutton, what can I do for you?"

He's still trying to figure out what's going on. How and why I'm standing here with his worst enemy at my side. I was supposed to be out running errands.

Then things go horribly wrong. Sutton pulls a gun from his pocket and points it at my head. I can't breathe. Everything in the room starts spinning. I can feel my body falling into a panic attack. It's almost an out of body experience. I haven't felt like this in years. And flashes of that horrible day in court six years ago flash through my mind.

In a matter of seconds, Will rushes forward, but stops dead in his tracks when the gun moves from me to him.

"Will, I'm sorry. I should have left it alone. I should have let you handle it. I just…" I sound desperate, No pathetic really. Will's eyes move to me. He's thoroughly confused. But before he can ask any questions, Sutton speaks up.

"Your wife tells me you wish to no longer represent me."

A thin line forms on Will's lips. He glares at me. I know I screwed up, but I had too. If we make it through this alive, it will be worth the days, maybe even weeks that Will might be upset with me.

"She was mistaken," he says, sternly.

I can't bear to look at him. My gaze moves to the floor. The gun is still pointed at Will's head.

"No, I don't think she was. I don't usually take kindly to people dismissing me."

"I assure you, we are not dismissing you," Will says, in haste. Moving a few inches closer in my direction. He may be upset, terrified himself, but he'll try to protect me until his last breath. I hope it doesn't come to that.

"I've got half a mind to shoot you right now and let her watch."

My head jerks up. "No!" I protest. "It's my fault. I overstepped my bounds. Please, don't shoot Will." On instinct, I rush forward, but only make it a few steps before the gun is pointed at me again. I freeze.

"Step back, Alicia." A smug, sly smile crosses Sutton's lips, and my blood runs cold. "It took some guts for you to confront me like you did, I respect that, even if I don't like it. Since I'm in a good mood today, thanks to your husband closing my business deal, and since murder is such a messy business. I'd hate for you to have to clean that up," he adds, with absolute seriousness. "I'll make you a deal."

"What kind of deal?" Will asks, placing his hands on his hips.

"The kind where everyone wins. You two agree to keep our past dealings, namely my kidnapping of you, quiet. You wave my fees for the deal we closed today, and I'll sign that contract Alicia drew up."

His focus remains on Will. Clearly, I have no say in this negotiation. Will's eyes quickly move to me, then back to Sutton.

Will folds his arms across his chest. "Let me get this straight. We keep quiet about what happened eight months ago, wave a few fees, and you'll take your business somewhere else? It's never that simple."

I could recognize the doubt in his eyes a mile away.

Sutton chuckles, and briefly puts the gun down at his side. I am a complete wreck, still doing my best to keep the anxiety under control, but I'm not going to last much longer before this panic attack starts to show it's ugly face.

Sutton steps back. Stands so close to me I can feel his body heat. Will looks like he's ready to pounce again. Sutton swiftly pulls the gun up again, pressing it to the side of my head. I can't breathe.

Will tries to move to me, but his men stop him pulling out their guns. "Yes, Mr. Gardner, it's that simple. But if I ever get even a whiff that you've told anyone about our less congenial dealings, I'll kill her."

Will, swallows, but keeps his composure. "I assure you, we will never speak a word of it to anyone." His eyes are on me again. His fists are clenched. I imagine is this taking as much out of him as it is me.

Sutton lowers the gun, and I feel my chest expand, but I reach for the back of the chair in front of me to keep me from collapsing.

Not another word is spoken. Sutton nods, and he and his men leave Will's office. I clench the chair even harder. My heart is racing. Will moves quickly next to me. I can't bear to look at him. I'm not even sure I can open my eyes. Everything is spinning.

"Leesh,"

"Will, you can yell at me all you want in a few minutes, but I'm having a panic attack," my voice is shaky. "Please, just for a minute hold me. Make the trembling stop." Tears begin to fall down my cheeks. "I'm sorry, just please,"

He reaches his hand to mine that's still gripping the chair. He moves close wrapping his free arm around my back. With some effort he pries my hand free, wrapping me up in his warm embrace. I cry into his shirt. He holds me tighter.

"I can't stop shaking," I admit, among the tears.

"It's okay." His voice is smooth and comforting. His hands run gentle circles over my back. "We're okay, Leesh." He was tense too. I can feel his body relax against mine. We stay like this. Eventually my body begins to calm. The tears subside, but I can't bring myself to pull out of his embrace.

A few minutes later there's a knock on the door. Instinctively, I tense up, grasping onto him tighter.

The door opens and his assistant steps in. I can't see her face, but she must start to retreat when she sees us. "It's okay. What do you need?" Will asks.

"Your one-thirty is here."

He sighs heavily. "Tell them I'll just be a few minutes."

Moments later I hear the door close again. I manage to pull away from him, just a bit, and look up into his eyes.

"Better?" he questions, concern written all over his features.

"Yes," I say, exhaling a deep breath. "Just a little tired now. A little shaken up."

He nods, and steps away. "I want you to go home. I'll get a car for you. I don't want you driving." His tone begins to change.

"Will, I'll be fine. I have work to do this afternoon."

"No, Alicia," he says, sternly. "I know the kind of strain those attacks put on your body. Once the adrenaline wears off, you're going to crash," he's behind his desk again. Our few moments of peace are over.

I get defensive. "Will, I want to be here. I need to work."

"No! You need to rest so you don't get sick, and I won't have to worry about you dying again tomorrow."

He may be right, but the emotional rollercoaster we've just been on, probably doesn't have me thinking clearly. I fold my arms and glare at him, unwilling to move.

He shakes his head and manages an angry chuckle. "What the hell were you thinking?" His hands go to his hips.

"I was thinking that you weren't doing anything about our situation with Sutton. You've been telling me for months that you were going to take care of it. Get rid of him. But I haven't seen any evidence of that happening. So, I took things into my own hands. I was not about to go through the holiday season with him interfering in our lives."

He runs his hands over his face in frustration and exhaustion. "You put both our lives in danger this afternoon. Mira could have been left without a father or mother. Were you even thinking about her when you…I'm assuming you were the one who went to Sutton. Not the other way around."

"I'm the one not thinking about our daughter? Are you serious? I'm not the one who's kept her in danger for eight months. We needed to put an end to this a long time ago, Will." I shake my head. My body is starting to shut down. "You know what? I am going to go home. To be with our daughter." I turn and head towards the door.

"That isn't fair, Alicia. Everything I've done the past eight months was to protect you and her."

I stop at the door, my hand on the knob, but I don't turn around. "I know," I admit, defeated. He's right. As angry as I am about all of this. I'm the one who picked the fight. The whole situation has been eating at me for months, and sometimes he seemed so blind to all of it. Like it didn't matter. That he didn't care even though it was affecting our life and our marriage. Despite all of that, he has every right to be angry. I did put both of our lives in danger.

"You'll be home for dinner?" I ask, my back still turned to him. This isn't over. He'll be upset with me for a few days, and it's okay. No marriage is perfect. And, after all, we do argue for a living. We're both bull headed, opinionated, hate to lose any argument even when we know full well we're wrong. But we also love each other. Eventually that bond of love will conquer the anger. Honestly, I'm not sorry, and never will be sorry, that we'll never have to see Sutton again, and that Will can hopefully really move past what happened to him.

"Yes," he says.

I feel his eyes on me as I open the door and walk across the small reception area to mine.

Mira had just gone down for a nap when I got home, so I told Rachel, the nanny, she could leave for the day. Will was right, I need to lie down, I'm completely drained, but the few hours Mira's asleep should be enough rest for me to recover.

I close the curtains in our room to keep out the afternoon light and climb into bed. I stare at the empty space next to me – Will's side of the bed. My eyes move to the picture on the nightstand. A black and white shot of he and Mira. The tears spill from my eyes again. I love them both so much. I really did jeopardize our future today. I force the tears to stop moments later, and turn over, falling into sleep.

I'm on the phone with Grace, Mira in my other arm, when Will comes home. He looks exhausted. He drops his briefcase and suit coat on the sofa, then comes into the kitchen. He kisses the top of my head and takes Mira out of my arms who practically jumped out of them to get to her father. She's still a daddy's girl. The first time those two really butt heads might bring the apartment down in flames. I don't know that either of them will survive it.

"Mom, is Zach coming?" Grace asks. We're discussing the plans for Thanksgiving next week.

"No. It's a long way to come for only a few days. He said he'd try to come for Christmas, but I'm thinking maybe we should go there for Christmas. How would you feel about spending some of your holiday break out there?"

"That would be great. Mom, I gotta go. Study group. I'll see you next week."

"You're coming on the Wednesday train, right?" I clarify because it seems her plans change all the time.

'Yes. Can you pick me up from the station? The train gets in at six."

"I'll be there."

I get off the phone and watch Wil and Mira while I finish up dinner. He's lying on the floor on his back, holding her up in the air. She's giggling so hard her face is turning red. She never laughs like that for me.

"Dada!" she screams, and Will brings her down blowing a sloppy kiss into her neck.

"Dinner is ready," I say, interrupting their fun.

The meal moves along a little awkwardly. I ask if Sutton's deal was closed. Will responds affirmatively. We both focus on Mira for the remainder of the meal, ignoring the obvious tension.

Will spends the remaining thirty minutes before Mira's bedtime giving his full attention to her. He bought her a small bat and ball a few weeks ago and is trying to teach her how to swing. It's adorable watching them. She can barely swing the bat, but it doesn't keep Will from trying.

After she goes to bed, Will lies on the couch and turns on the television. I don't try to push him into conversation. He needs to wind down. I go into the den, and try to do some work that I didn't get to this afternoon

A few hours later, Will heads to the bedroom and takes a shower. I'm tired, so go get ready for bed.

When he emerges from the bathroom, I'm already curled up beneath the covers, my back facing him. I'm staring blankly at the curtains across the room. He gets into bed turning out the lamp. We lay there in the darkness in complete silence.

I'm not really certain what to say. I should probably apologize again. Just as I muster up the courage, he starts to talk.

"Leesh, you scared me half to death today."

I shift beneath the covers and turn to face him. He's lying on his back, one arm behind his head. I meet his gaze that's barely visible with the light from outside coming in. "I know. I'm sorry. I know you're upset. But I had to do something," I defend.

"It was reckless," he says, but doesn't raise his voice. "He could have hurt you, or worse killed you, and I wouldn't have been able to stop him."

"I know, but he didn't. And now he's out of our lives. I'm sorry if you don't like the way I handled things, but I'm not sorry he's gone. I never will be sorry for that."

He sighs heavily and turns to face me. "You're stubborn, you know that?"

I can't help but smile. "Yes, it's one of my finer qualities that you seem to like."

He reaches his hand to rest gently on my hip. "Yes. As aggravating as it is. Promise me you won't do anything like this ever again?"

"You know I can't promise something like that. I'd do it all over again for you if I had to. You'd do the same thing if you were in my shoes."

He pulls me closer to him. "I would," he admits. "But that doesn't mean I like it."

I reach my hand resting it on his cheek. "I'll try to be more careful, okay. Try to stay out of danger. I love you."

"I'm going to be upset with you for a few days," he says, turning his head to kiss my hand.

"I know."

"I love you too," he says, bringing his lips to meet mine.

For the first time in months, I believe we'll be okay. That we're finally safe. Will deepens our kiss, almost as if he read my mind. For tonight all we need is to feel close to one another.

A/N; Thank you all to those still reading this. I got a few new follows over the past few weeks. I'm always grateful to you as readers, and the feedback you provide. From here on out each chapter will be more of a one shot. This story was always meant to be more like that. Touching on moments throughout their marriage, than one continuous plot. Hopefully you all won't mind. Have a good week!