Most of the feedback I got from my question last chapter was that you want a longer story and are okay with the darker turn. I will be changing the rating to M as of this chapter. I'm sorry if that wasn't what you were looking for but it has unblocked my writers block and I'm gonna go with it. Italics are flashback.

I've also updated a few pieces of the previous chapters.

Thinking about doing some one-shots here and there so please let me know if there's anything you really wanna see outside the realm of this story, and I'm also currently planning another story that I won't even begin updating until it's way more fleshed out.

But besides all that….here's your chapter

Clary woke with a start. She was wrapped in someone's arms and she was quickly overheating. Her breathing became labored as the claustrophobia set it.

"Hey Love – I didn't know you were awa…" Clary shrieked at the sudden noise and flung herself off the bed and into the far corner. Jace immediately sprung out of the bed and crouched low, approaching Clary as though she were a cowering dog.

"Clare. Hey Red, you're okay. You should crawl back in bed and I'll…"

"Izzy. Please go get Izzy." Clary said quietly as she turned her head away from Jace so that her forehead rested against the wall. Jace reached forward to pick her up and she flinched immediately, curling further into the wall.

"Clary I don't understand. Last night…"

"I need Izzy. Please go get her." Clary said firmly, interrupting Jace for the third time. Jace just stared for a moment, stunned at how quickly she had flipped, studied her face for a moment, then shot into a standing position and walked out the door.

He barged into Izzy's room without knocking and shook her until she groaned.

"What do you want Jace? I'm hungover as fuck and you know you would hate me if I woke you up this early."

"Clary needs you." Jace said calmly, looking at the floor. Izzy shot into a sitting position, sobering up within seconds.

"Did she talk to you? What happened?"

"No she didn't talk. She woke up screaming and calling for me in the middle of the night and I held her until she fell asleep. When I woke up this morning I just sat with her for a while until I noticed she had woken up. As soon as I started to speak she bolted out of the bed and into the corner. She looks awful Izzy. Just awful and there's nothing I can do to help her." Jace's voice cracked on his final sentence. Izzy moved into action immediately.

"I'll be right back. I'm going to check in with her and then I'll come get you."

Clary noticed the door opening slowly and she cringed at the sound of it closing, her only path of escape cut off. Then she noticed Izzy walking toward her and she sat up a little bit straighter.

"Hey Clare, how are you feeling?"

"Izzy, I'm scared. I'm so so so scared to talk about it. What if he finds out? What if he comes here looking for me? I can't…" Izzy scooted herself a little closer to Clary, looking at her and willing her to speak.

"Izzy you can't tell Jace any of this. He…He wouldn't…I just don't want to be alone."

"Clary, I promise that none of what you say will leave this room unless you want it to. But you should know that nothing would convince him to stop caring about you." Clary winced at Izzy's acknowledgement of Jace's feelings. She almost started hyperventilating before Izzy took her hands and crawled even closer so their knees were touching.

"I know this is really hard for you to say, and I get that you don't want to relive it but it's killing you Clary. You look exhausted and I just want to help you carry this massive weight that was dropped on you."

"You're my best friend Iz. I can't loose you."

"Listen to me Clary. Absolutely nothing that that bastard could have done will make me not want to stay right here by your side."

"I feel like such trash. I feel used. I-I lost my virginity last night Iz." Clary whispered the final sentence so quietly that Izzy wasn't sure she heard correctly, but Clary's abrupt sobbing confirmed it for her.

"Clarissa Fray you listen to me. You are not trash. You're an amazing person, a wonderful artist, and my best friend in the world. I love you so much and that is not going to change because of the shit that that bastard put you through. You didn't loose your virginity that douchebag took it from you…" Clary knew Izzy was still talking and she was desperately trying to keep focused. The individual words began to blur into random syllables and the edges of her vision began to blur into black…

"Thanks Seb but I don't really want…"

"I said I will see you in there Clarissa." Clary put her head down and walked through the archway leading back into the living room. She paused in the darkness of the crowded room and looked back to see Sebastian right behind her, thrusting a beer into her hand.

"Hey baby, I promise it'll loosen you up. You're too tense." Sebastian whispered as he ran a hand down Clary's arm until his hand was intertwined with her free hand. It was a touching gesture that Clary hadn't seen a lot of lately.

Clary had a little less than a sip of beer and it made her feel lightheaded for a moment in addition to the terrible taste. She continued to pretend to drink so Sebastian wouldn't get mad. She had seen Izzy drunk enough to know how to play tipsy. About an hour later she "misplaced" her drink. By this point in time, Clary knew how to get around Seb's anger. By this point in the party, she was regretting even coming.

"Hey Seb, I really have to go to the bathroom, I'll be back in a sec."

"Hurry back babe." Sebastian was almost at the point of slurring, but he was still able to form grammatically correct sentences so Clary assumed he was fine.

After taking a little while in the upstairs restroom to compose herself, Clary swung open the door to find herself caged in by Sebastian's arms.

"Seb, what are you doing? You startled me!" Clary laughed uncomfortably.

"I'm done waiting Clare, let's get this party going."

"Seb, we've been partying for nearly three hours now. I think it's time to get going from this party. I think I'm gonna go find Jace and…" Sebastian cut her off by grabbing her wrist and pulling her back to him. He had obviously consumed more alcohol in the short time Clary was in the bathroom.

"It's always 'Jace this' and 'Jace that'. God even the teachers paired you two together. You know we've been dating for over four months now and the only lay I have gotten was from that Kaelie Whitewillow slut like six weeks ago. We should be in bed right now – why didn't you drink your beer?" Clary stood stunned at the information she had just received. She needed more time to process but she couldn't get past the question he had asked her.

"How did you know I didn't finish my beer?"

"Please. I paid good money for that rohypnol. You should be roofied as fuck right now and I should be hilt deep in these…" Sebastian was reaching for Clary's hips. She aggressively pushed him back but he easily twisted her hands, grabbing her wrists and jerking her down the hallway into one of the empty bedrooms.

"Seb stop. Seb PLEASE!" Clary ripped her wrists out of his grasp and tried to get to the door but Sebastian shoved her to the floor, tearing the sleeve of her flannel in the process.

"Sebastian stop! You are drunk. You don't want to do this!" Sebastian punctuated each of his words by tearing her clothing piece by piece, pushing her skirt up and throwing her shoes.

"You. Deserve. This. You. Damn. Slut." Clary was moving as much as she possibly could through the stabbing pain in her side. She had begun hyperventilating and could barely see through her tears.

Sebastian didn't bother disrobing or taking her innocence into account. He simply unzipped his pants and took her. Clary screamed out in pain.

"Come on baby, you get to sleep with the star of the soccer team." Sebastian coaxed. Clary didn't know what to do. She couldn't even process an entire thought – certainly not enough of a thought as to the repercussions of her next action.

"JACE!" She yelled out, praying that somehow he was close enough to hear her and help. There was a resounding noise inside of her head before she felt the impact of the slap on her cheek. Everything went black even though she could still hear and feel everything that was going on.

Before Sebastian could scold her, she felt his weight being lifted off of her. She only had a second of relief before she could feel him pulling her up again.

"No! no! JACE!" Clary cried, slightly amazed by her ability to cry out due to the extreme lack of air she could get into her lungs.

"Hey Red, I'm right here. Open your eyes love! Stop crying. You're okay now. I'm here." Clary's eyes flew open in relief, thinking Jace would calm her down. She couldn't make it stop though. It was the most terrifying thing she had ever experienced. Clary could hear yelling and cars starting but she couldn't gain enough control over her body to stop crying or even take in an adequate breath. It honestly felt like the end.

Clary was fully sobbing now and Izzy had silent tears streaming down her face. The door swung open with a bang, startling Clary and revealing a flushed Jace, his hair even more tousled than when he had woken up and his cheeks were slightly wet.

"Clary," His voice broke in the middle of her name, "He raped you."

Don't hate me. Please review.