Disclaimer: I don't own Doctor Who, or any of its characters, I only own my OC Time Lady, the Hatter.

This is the fifth instalment of the series, so I suggest that if you are just finding this one now that you go back and read the first four instalments first. Any questions, feel free to PM or ask on my Tumblr, which is under the same penname, and I'll be more than happy to answer any questions.

Now, the Hatter is in her Tenth regeneration. She has straight blonde hair with a side fringe, baby blue eyes, stands around 5'9 in height, has quite pale skin, high cheek bones, and has a Scottish accent.

And she usually always wears on a day to day bases a plain white button up shirt, military green leather trousers that she has tucked into a pair of brown, lace up riding boots with a small heel that come to just below her knees, a military style green brass button up waistcoat, a rainbow bowtie, and matching rainbow braces, not to mention her military green Pork-Pie hat. She also wears a silver pendent with Gallifreyan markings on it at all times and an engagement ring with a single rounded White-Point Star diamond sitting in the middle of the band that's also covered all around with smaller, White-Point Stars, and her wedding ring that has tiny, Earth diamonds covering the band.

Anyway, on with the story :)

….

The Eleventh Hour, Part One

"You bloody idiot!" the Hatter shouted as she struggled to try holding onto a railing with one hand, the other reaching out for the Doctor's hand, who was only just grasping on to the edge of the TARDIS doors with the sonic in his mouth, "What were you thinking, opening the TARDIS doors while in the middle of crashing!" she winced as the console sparked loudly behind her. She shook her head, "And you wonder why you never passed your TARDIS examines!"

The time machine flew over the top of London, completely out of control as the Doctor struggled to try pulling himself back up into the safety of the console room, "It's not my fault!" he somehow managed to get out around the sonic screwdriver, "My heads not working, it's all fuzzy!"

She rolled her eyes, still looking annoyed as she stretched her arm out further, "You've got that right," she muttered more to herself then to him, sighing in relief as she finally managed to grab his left wrist, trying to pull him up, "Dear me," she groaned after a moment of struggling, "I see you haven't got any lighter since regenerating, either that or your ego really needs to go on a diet…probably the last one!"

He glanced back over his shoulder, his eyes widening in alarm as he spotted Big Ben coming towards him, "Get to the console!" he suddenly called urgently, "Take us up!"

She frowned at him and raised her eyes, and let out a string of curse words in Gallifreyan as she abounded trying to pull him up, jumping to her feet, and struggled back up to the ramp, dashing up to the controls. She grabbed a lever and pulled it, causing the controls to spark violently, and she ducked as she looked back over to the doors, pleased to see the Doctor narrowly miss the top of Big Ben as they flew over it.

"Are you okay, sweetheart?" she called as she hurried back over to the doors, dropping to her knees, and reached out again for his wrist.

The Doctor glanced up at her, looking extremely relieved, "Have I ever told you how much I love you today?"

She laughed, shaking her head fondly, "Ah, right as rain, then".

Finally, he managed to pull himself back up into the console, quickly closing the doors behind him as they both fell against them with sighs of relief, both feeling quite tired from the effort, but despite that they exchanged smiles. Suddenly, the ship jolted, sending them flying as the Time Lady yelped loudly in surprise.

…

The TARDIS crashed landed in the garden of an old house in the middle of the night, destroying a small shed that they had landed on, thick smoke pouring out all around it. The moment it had crashed, the Time Lords found themselves being tossed backwards through the ship, much to their displeasure, but luckily they had a soft, if not very wet and surprising landing, due to ending up in the swimming pool…which also happened to be in the library.

Somehow, they managed to pull themselves back up to the console, getting the doors open, sending smoke and stem billowing out, and the Time Lady found a grappling hook, which she threw out the doors, sighing in relief when it caught on something. She quickly pulled herself up the rope, grumbling as the brim of her soaking wet hat, now floppy due to the water, fell into her eyes, not to mention her fringe, but she pushed on and soon enough found herself looking over the edge of the time machine, feeling the cool night air on her wet face, which was quite nice.

Almost at once she noticed that there landing hadn't gone unnoticed as she caught sight of a little girl with red hair and green eyes, wearing a white nightgown, over which she had a red cardigan, and gumboots staring wide eyed at her, though, she noted that she didn't seem to be very frightened.

The blonde immediately gave her a friendly smile and pulled herself completely out of the TARDIS, swinging one leg over the doorway, and then the next, carefully balancing herself, "Hello," she said brightly to the girl.

The girl blinked at her, "Hello…" she greeted slowly.

The Hatter's smile grew even wider as she noticed her Scottish accent, "Ooh, lovely accent," she remarked, giving her a approving look, before something banged loudly from inside the TARDIS, and she looked back down into the ship, "Need any help, sweetheart?" she called down.

"All good!" the Doctor replied, and a moment later his hand appeared right beside her, and then the next, before his soaking wet head popped up. His eyes found the girl, breaking into a small smile, "Could I have an apple?" he asked her suddenly, "All I can think about…apples," he shook his head, glancing at the Time Lady, who gave him an amused look, "I love apples. Maybe I'm having a craving?" he brightened slightly at the thought, "That's new. Never had cravings before," he pulled himself up, swinging one leg over the edge of the TARDIS, and looked back down through the ship, "Whoa! Look at that!"

The Time Lady sighed slightly as she looked back down, "The old girl is certainly not going to be happy," she commented and patted one of the open doors.

"Are you okay?" the girl questioned, eyeing there tattered clothing and dishevelled, wet hair.

"Oh, nice accent!" the Doctor grinned, nudging the Hatter's side as he gestured in-between them, and swung his other leg over the edge, "Just had a fall," he continued to the girl, "All the way down there, right to the library".

"It was quite a climb," the Hatter added, "I didn't think I was going to make it for a moment there. I'm afraid that I'm not the most physically strong in this regeneration".

The girl frowned at them, "You're soaking wet".

He shrugged, "We were in the swimming pool".

"You said you were in the library".

"Yeah, and so was the swimming pool," the Time Lady nodded, looking amused.

The girl seemed to sigh, giving them a careful look, "Are you the police?"

The Time Lords exchanged a quick look, "Why, did you call the police?" they asked her, leaning closer towards her.

"Did you come about the crack in my wall?"

The Hatter slipped off the edge and stepped closer to her, giving her a concerned look as she knelt down so that they were eye level, "What type of crack…?" she began, only to be cut off by the Doctor crying out in pain.

"Argh!" he groaned loudly, drawing there attention as he jolted off the edge, and landing on his side on the ground beside them, clutching at his chest.

The blonde gave him a sympathetic look as she turned to him, "Oh, dear," she shook her head, eyeing him, "I see that the post regenerative pains have started".

The girl gave him a worried look, "Are you okay, mister?"

He pulled himself back up to his knees, still clutching at his chest, "No, I'm fine," he grimaced slightly in pain, waving her concern away, "This is all perfectly norm…" he trailed off and coughed, opening his mouth, letting a burst of regeneration energy swirl out of his mouth, and into the air.

They watched as it faded, the girls eyes widening slightly again, "Who are you?"

"I don't know yet," he replied, smiling slightly as he held out his hands, and they glowed with more energy, "I'm still cooking," the girl frowned at him, "Does it scare you?"

"No, it just looks a bit wired," she shook her head.

"No," the Hatter smiled softly at her as she straightened, meeting the girls eyes, "We meant the crack in your wall," she clarified, "Are you afraid of it?"

"Yes," she admitted.

The Time Lady gave her a comforting look, "Don't worry, we'll sort it out," her eyes twinkled as she leaned closer to her, lowering her voice as she nodded at the Doctor, "Or though, something tells me that someone is going to need a snack first".

The Doctor raised his eyebrows at her, "Are you talking about me, dear?" his eyes narrowed as he looked in-between them, but his tone was light.

She pretended to gasp as she straightened, a hand flying to the middle of her chest, "Why, I would never do such a thing, sweetheart," she mockingly defended herself.

He smiled and waggled his finger at her, "Oh, of course you wouldn't," he shook his head and suddenly jumped to his feet, looking at the girl, "Well then, no time to lose," he commented, "I'm the Doctor and she's the Hatter," he nodded to the blonde, and gave the girl a little wave, "Do everything we tell you, don't ask stupid questions, and don't wonder off," he turned and began strolling off, looking determined, and…right into a tree, knocking himself to the ground.

The Hatter coughed, struggling to hold back a laugh as she stepped over to him, looking down at him, "I think someone put a tree there, Doctor," she remarked quietly, her voice shaking with supressed laughter.

"You alright?" the girl joined the Time Lady, looking down at him.

"Early days," he replied, frowning slightly as he looked back up at them, "Steering's a bit off".

"Well, I do hope it's not going to be permeant," the Time Lady remarked, still struggling not to laugh as she held out a hand to help him up, "Because it's just to amusing".

…

Eventually, the girl led them up to her house, and through to her kitchen, leaving them in the doorway as she fetched the Doctor an apple, while they glanced around curiously.

"If you're a Doctor and a Hatter, why does your box say 'Police?'" the girl questioned as she eyed them almost suspiciously, turning back to them.

The Doctor grabbed the apple in her hand, giving it a quick sniff, before taking a bite. He chewed it twice before spitting it out, his eyes still fixed on the girl, who followed the bit of apple, looking disgusted. The Time Lady sighed, shaking her head, not in the slightest bit surprised. He coughed, holding up the apple as if it had offended him, "That's disgusting," he grimaced, "What is that?"

The blonde took the apple, tilting her head at it, and took a bite, "Oh, lovely," she smiled after a moment of chewing, quickly swallowing as the Doctor gave her a look as if she was insane.

The girl frowned at him, "An apple".

"Apple's rubbish," he shook his head, still casting the Hatter looks, "I hate apples".

"You said you loved them".

The Hatter rolled her eyes, nudging his side, "Don't pay much attention to what he thinks he likes," she advised her, taking another bite of the apple, and chewing, "He really has no idea himself at this point".

"Do so!" the Doctor argued, sounding childish, and she raised her eyebrows at him in amusement, "I like yoghurt," he turned back to the girl, "Yoghurt's my favourite. Give me yoghurt".

The girl sighed, casting him a look, and hurried over to the fridge. She pulled it open and grabbed a small container, quickly passing it to him. He pulled the lid off and tipped it into his mouth, almost immediately spitting it out, sending it flying past the girl, who looked even more disgusted. Even the Hatter, who had just taken another bite of her apple, cringed and sat the fruit on the closest kitchen unit, suddenly going off it.

"I hate yoghurt," he announced, passing the containing back to the girl as the Time Lady, unable to stand looking at his mouth, which was covered in yoghurt, grabbed a tea towel, and chucked it at him, "It's just stuff with bits in it!"

The girl sighed, "You said it was your favourite".

"New mouth, new rules," he shrugged, using the towel to wipe his mouth, but managing to make an even bigger mess of his chin by simply smearing it. The Hatter shook her head and grabbed the towel, quickly cleaning him up as he gave her a soft smile, managing to snag a kiss to her hand as she pulled away. He looked back to the girl, "It's like eating after cleaning your teeth," he explained, "Everything tastes wrong…argh!"

He suddenly shouted and twitched violently on the spot, smacking his forehead in the process as he seemed to calm down after a moment. He stumbled as he blinked in surprise, casting the Time Lady a slightly embarrassed look, as if checking to see if she had seen it, which, of course she had. It was rather hard not to notice really, and she gave him a mildly concerned look as she lightly battered his hands away from his damp forehead, gently touching the spot he had slapped.

"What is it?" the girl asked in alarm, eyeing the Doctor, "What's wrong with you?" she glanced at the blonde, seeming to feel that she was perhaps the more sane one of the two, which, at this point, the Hatter couldn't blame her, "Is he alright?"

"Wrong with me?" the Doctor gave her a mock offended look, dragging his eyes away from the Time Lady, "It's not my fault. Why can't you give me any decent food? You're Scottish, fry something," he nodded at the Hatter, "Hatter, teach her how to be properly Scottish," he told her in a tone as if to say that she had been purposely holding back on him.

The Hatter rolled her eyes at him, chucking the tea towel onto one of the benches, "Doctor, I'm not even properly Scottish," she reminded him, "I just have the accent and perhaps a few personality traits".

He stared at her blankly, "Isn't that enough?"

She opened and closed her mouth, before sighing heavily, "Oh, why do I bother," she muttered, shaking her head in mild exasperation, but there was a hint of amusement as she looked back to the girl, "Do you have a frying pan?" she questioned.

….

Once the girl had located a frying pan, the Hatter set to work frying bacon at the stove, despite already knowing that the Doctor was probably just going to end up spitting it out. While she was doing that, the girl ran upstairs to grab them a clean, fluffy towel each to dry their hair with, passing one to the Doctor, who took it and began drying his hair, and sat the second on the table for the Time Lady.

"Ah, thank you," the blonde smiled across at her as she flipped the bacon, "I do apologise for taking over your kitchen like this, but I really couldn't sit back and watch a child cook. I'm not Petunia Dursley, after all".

The girl glanced over to the Doctor, who was busy wondering around the rest of the kitchen, pulling out draws and going through them, while one hand ruffled his hair with the towel. She stepped closer to the blonde, "Is he…sick?" she frowned slightly, lowering her voice.

The Hatter blinked in mild surprise, following her gaze, "He has been recently," she finally replied quietly, choosing her words carefully, "But the worst parts mostly over now," she reached over to her and pattered her shoulder gently, "Don't worry".

She eyed her curiously, "But you don't look sick?"

"Well, that's because I promised not to get sick," she smiled down at her, a hint of amusement in her tone, "And I always keep my promises".

"How can you promise not to get sick?"

"Ah, a very good question, and I suppose it rather depends on the sickness. In this case, I was lucky enough to avoid it".

"You're lucky," the girl remarked.

The Time Lady laughed softly, glancing over at the Doctor, remembering how determined he had been that she wouldn't regenerate with him, "Oh, believe me, I know," she gave herself a shake and turned back to the stove, "Would you mind grabbing me a plate?" she glanced at the girl.

She nodded and rushed over to one of the cupboards, grabbing a plate, and hurried back. The Hatter took the plate and quickly transported the rashes of bacon onto it, turning off the stove, and stepped over to the Doctor, who was fiddling with two spoons, giving him a light smack on his hand.

"Ow!" he yelped and dropped the spoons, turning to her with wide, confused eyes, "What was that for?"

She gave him a stern look, "That's for messing around with other people's belongings without permission," she scolded lightly, "Now, sit down before it gets cold," she pointed over to the kitchen table.

Knowing better then to argue, he did as he was told, and sat down as she sat the plate in front of him, "Ah!" his eyes brightened in delight as he looked down at it, "Bacon!"

"Don't say I never do anything nice for you," the Hatter commented as she took her damp hat off, sitting it on the table, and grabbed her own towel.

"I can think of a few nice things you've done for me recently," he slyly looked across her at her, his eyes twinkling.

Luckily, the towel hid most of her blush as she waved a finger at him, dropping her voice so that only he could hear, "Innocent ears present, sweetheart," she coughed, nodding over to the girl, who had taken a sit across the table from him.

"Oh, right," he cleared his throat, grabbing his knife and fork, and cut a piece of bacon. He put it in his mouth, and almost at once spat it out again, practically clawing at his tongue to remove it, "Bacon?" he grimaced in distaste as the girl frowned at him, "That's bacon?" he leaned forwards, casting a accusing look back and forth between the girl and the blonde, who had lowered the towel to watch, "Are you trying to poison me?"

The Hatter gave him a very serious look, "I just might by the end of tonight, Doctor".

….

Next, they moved onto baked beans, which the Hatter reluctantly agreed to cook, only doing so because she knew the Doctor would end up getting the girl to cook. She made a face as she stirred the pot on the stove, never having been fond of the food herself, and she could already see what was going to happen next.

"Ah, you see?" the Doctor remarked as he stood by the stove, watching the Time Lady happily, not seeming to notice the look she threw him, "Beans," he smiled as he retook his seat at the table.

The Hatter spooned some of the contents of the pot onto a plate, and sat it in front of him, giving him an overly sweet smile as she did so. He paused, giving her a slightly wary look, knowing better than anyone that, that smile usually meant someone was going to get slapped, or she knew something was going to happen, and she felt he deserved it.

"Enjoy, sweetheart," she told him pleasantly, taking a seat at the end of the table, and resting her chin on the palm of her hand, watching him.

He really didn't like the twinkle in her eyes and he continued to watch her carefully as he picked up his spoon, and scooped some beans up, and into his mouth…only to spring up a second later, running over to the sink, spitting the mouthful out as the poor girl, who had watched the entire time, looked as if she was about to be sick.

"Beans are evil," he looked back to them, looking very, very serious, "Bad, bad beans".

The Time Lady rolled her eyes as she rubbed the girls back, casting her a concerned look, "Well, I could have told you that," she shook her head, "Beans are, after all, the Voldemort of the canned food world".

"Why didn't you tell me, then?"

"Oh, like you would have listen," she laughed, shrugging, "Besides, you made me cook them, and I figured I might as well get some payback for not letting me regenerate," she raised her eyebrows at him, "Perhaps bread and butter would be easier?"

He broke into a broad smile, clapping his hands, before pointing at her, "Now you're talking!"

She cast him an amused look at the girl jumped up and run over to one of the cupboards, grabbing the butter, the bread, a butter knife, and a plate. She quickly grabbed a slice of bread and spread butter over it, handing it to the Doctor eagerly, or though she eyed him slightly.

He took it and gave the bread a sniff, before taking a bite…suddenly, he stood and marched out of the room with the plate, looking personally insulted as they heard the front door open, the sound of a plate smashing, and a cat meowing loudly as if something had hit it, "And stay out!" he shouted, closing the door with a bang, and re-entering the kitchen.

The Hatter closed her eyes briefly, "What, may I ask, did that plate ever do to you, Doctor?" she opened her eyes, giving him a tired look as he began pacing the room, "Not to mention the poor cat you probably scared to death".

"Oh, it had it coming," he muttered darkly, giving her a serious look, and she nodded slowly, looking amused.

The girl opened the fridge and looked inside, "We've got some carrots," she informed him.

"Oh, dear…" the Time Lady groaned softly.

"Carrots?" the Doctor exclaimed, sounding outraged as he stared at her, "Are you insane?"

"No, sweetheart, but I think you are," the blonde commented as she stood, moving over to the fridge, "Here, let me see…" she examined the contents, her eyes brightening as she opened the freezer part, "Ah, brilliant," she grinned, grabbing a frozen box of fish fingers, moving down to the main part of the fridge, "Now, I suppose I could always make it from scratch…" she muttered, before catching sight of something in the door, "Oh, good, we can use the cheat stuff," she grabbed a carton of custard, and closed the door with her hip, her hands already full as she looked back to the other two, "Fish fingers and custard, that's what you need".

The Doctor stared at her, his eyes traveling down to what she had in her arms as the girl grimaced, "Fish fingers and custard?" he repeated, sounding startled by the thought.

She shrugged, "My Second body went through a similar crises when she regenerated, and the only thing she found enjoyable was fish fingers in custard".

Still not looking entirely convinced, he shrugged and sat at the table.

….

The Hatter smiled, feeling quite pleased with herself as she watched the Doctor happily dip fish fingers into a large bowl of custard across the table from her and the girl, who were sharing a tub of vanilla ice cream. It wasn't quite how she might have normally taken it, but she had managed to convince the girl to try adding jelly babies into the tub. They both laughed as the Doctor lifted the bowl of custard and drunk from it, sitting it back on the table to reveal a custard moustache.

"That's an interesting look, sweetheart," she grinned at him.

He leaned across the table towards her, waggling his eyebrows, "Do I get a kiss, dear?"

"I'm sorry, but my Mother made sure that my nanny taught me never to play with my food".

He laughed and wiped his hand across his mouth, removing the moustache as the girl looked in-between them, "You're funny," she commented, looking amused.

"Am I?" the Doctor brightened, smiling at her, "Good. Funny's good".

"Better then grumpy," the Time Lady added, giving him a pointed look, thinking about his First body, "So, what's your name?" she glanced at the girl, scooping a bit of ice cream into her mouth.

"Amelia Pond".

"Oh, that's a brilliant name," they smiled broadly at her, "Amelia Pond. Like a name in a fairy tale," he cast a look around the room, "Are we in Scotland, Amelia?"

The Hatter sniffed the air curiously, shaking her head, "Nope".

Amelia nodded in agreement, sighing slightly, "Had to move to England," she told them, "It's rubbish".

"What about your parents?" the Time Lady asked, frowning slightly as she glanced up at the ceiling, slightly concerned, "Are they here? I can't imagine that they would have slept through all of this noise, let alone be happy about a couple of strangers in there house".

"I don't have a Mum and Dad," she shook her head sadly, glancing down, "Just an Aunt".

"I don't even have an Aunt," the Doctor informed her, trying to cheer her up.

"You're lucky," both the Hatter and Amelia nodded to him, laughing as they realised what they had done, and the Time Lady raised her hand for a high five, which the girl happily returned, "But, on a serious note," the Hatter continued, tilting her head at the girl, "Where's your Aunt now?"

Amelia shrugged, "She's out".

"And she left you all alone?" both Time Lords frowned, exchanging a quick look.

"I'm not scared," she defended.

"Course you're not," the Doctor agreed, "You're not scared of anything! Box falls out of the sky, man and woman falls out of a box, man eats fish custard," he held up a fisher finger covered in custard to prove his point, "And look at you, just sitting there," he raised his eyebrows, "So you know what we think?"

"What?"

The Hatter smiled at her gently, bopping the tip her nose in an attempt to keep things light, "That must be quite a frightening crack in your wall".

…

Amelia led them upstairs and into her bedroom, where the Time Lords immediately noticed the curved crack that seemed to dip slightly in the middle on the back wall of the room. They moved closer to it, examining it carefully, running their fingers across it.

"You've had some cowboys in here," the Doctor remarked, before glancing back to Amelia, who watched from the doorway, holding an apple, "Not actual cowboys…though that can happen," he finished, seeming to rethink what he had just said.

The Hatter nudged his side, giving him a look, "Yeah, why don't you add that to the list of childhood nightmares she'll probably grow up to have," she muttered to him, shaking her head.

"I used to hate apples," Amelia told them, looking down at the apple in her hands as they looked back to her, "So my Mum put faces on them," she frowned slightly and stepped over to them, handing the Doctor the apple.

He took it and turned it over, exchanging a soft smile with the Time Lady as they looked at the smiley face that Amelia had carved into the skin.

"She sounds lovely, Amelia," the blonde looked at her, giving her a small smile, thinking about the phase that her youngest son had gone through where he had refused to eat his dinner, so she had done the same thing, making a large smiley face, or a face with a tongue sticking out on his plate. Her Mother had told her that she was just being silly, but she had found it quite amusing.

"I'll keep it for later," the Doctor nodded to the girl as he tossed it up in the air, before slipping it inside his pocket as they focused on the crack once more, "This wall is solid and the crack doesn't go all the way through it," he leaned closer to the wall, running his fingers over it again as he glanced at the Hatter, "So here's a thing…where's the draught coming from?"

The Hatter sighed and looked back at him, "Do you still have the sonic on you?" she asked, unsure if he had fallen out during their trip in the swimming pool.

"Ah!" he exclaimed and reached inside his pocket, withdrawing it, and flashing it at the crack, "Wibbly-wobbly timey-wimey," he said quickly as he checked the results, showing it to the Time Lady, "You know what this crack is?" he looked back to Amelia.

"What?" Amelia looked in-between them.

"…it's a crack," he looked back to it.

The Hatter rolled her eyes slightly at his explanation, "What he means, is that if you were to…say, knock this wall down," she gestured to the wall, glancing at Amelia to make sure she was still following, "The crack would still stay in the same place, because the crack isn't actually in the wall at all".

She frowned and looked up at them, "Where is it then?"

"Everywhere," they answered, growing even more worried with the more they learnt about the crack, "In everything," they exchanged a look, glancing back to the crack, eyeing it carefully, "It's a split in the skin of the world," they tapped on either side of the crack, "Two pars of space that should never have touched, pressed together right here in the wall of your bedroom…"

The Time Lady pressed her ear against the wall, listening closely, "Can you sometimes hear…?" she began, glancing over her shoulder.

"A voice?" Amelia cut across her, "Yes".

She nodded and stepped back from the wall, "We're going to need a glass…" she muttered more to herself then to the others.

The Doctor spun around, his eyes sweeping the room, before he caught sight of a glass on Amelia's bedside table. He darted across to it and grabbed it, his arm gave a funny little jerk, sending water flying over his shoulder.

"We'll clean that up later," the Hatter sighed to Amelia, not being able to wait until he had finally moved past regenerating. It was certainly causing a lot more mess and trouble then it ought to.

They watched as he glanced down at the puddle of water, shrugging slightly as he hurried back over to the wall, pressing the glass against the wall, and leaning closer towards it, listening, "Prisoner Zero?" he remarked after a moment.

"Prisoner Zero has escaped," Amelia nodded, and the Time Lady looked in-between them thoughtfully, "That's what I heard," she frowned, looking confused, "What does it mean?"

He continued listening as the Hatter put the pieces together, "It means…" she started slowly, eyeing the wall, "…that on the other side of that crack, there must be a prison," the Doctor stepped back, "And they've lost a prisoner".

The Doctor looked at the girl, "And you know what that means?"

"What?"

"You need a better wall," he sat the glass down, and he grabbed a desk that was against the wall, picking it up, and moving it out of the way as the Hatter took Amelia's hand, pulling her off to the side, "The only way to close the breach is to open it all the way," he continued, "The forces will invert and it'll snap itself shut or…" he trailed off, glancing at Amelia.

Amelia looked in-between them, sensing there hesitation, "What?"

The Hatter turned around to face her, leaning down so that they were eye level, still holding her hand, "Amelia, you know how adults say that everything is going to be okay, and you think that they're lying, just so you're not afraid?" she asked her gently.

She sighed, rolling her eyes slightly, "Yes".

She gave her a small, comforting smile, "Everything is going to be okay, and I promise," she made her voice sound bright, almost cheerful so as not to worry the girl to much more as she straightened, turning back around to the Doctor, who had watched there interaction with a small, soft smile, "Yes, sweetheart?" she raised her eyebrows at him, placing herself in front of Amelia.

"I forgot how good you are with kids," he replied, before giving himself a shake, and turned back to the wall, aiming his sonic at it. The crack glowed and a bright white light shone between it, when it slowly opened fully across the wall, revealing a darkened room with what looked like a prison cell.

"Prisoner Zero has escaped," a loud, deep voice echoed out to them and the Hatter gave Amelia's hand a squeeze, feeling her move closer towards her as the Doctor stepped forward, "Prisoner Zero has escaped".

"Shh, it's okay," the Time Lady murmured to the girl, before raising her voice, calling through the crack, "Hello, there".

"Hellooo!" the Doctor tried when there was no reply.

Suddenly, a large blue eyeball appeared in the space, causing the Doctor to jump back with a start, grabbing the Hater's free hand, as she pulled Amelia further behind her.

"What's that?" Amelia gasped, having caught a glimpse of it before being pulled out of sight.

A flash of light flew out of the space and hit the Doctor, causing him to double over, and fall onto the floor by the bed as the crack sealed itself.

"There we are," the Hatter smiled broadly as she looked down at Amelia, "I told you it would be okay," she glanced back over to the wall, "And not to mention close".

"Good as new," the Doctor added, grinning up at her.

"What's that thing?" Amelia stared, wide eyed at the wall, sounding fearful as she looked at the Hatter, holding her hand tighter, "Was that Prisoner Zero?"

"No," they shook their heads, glancing at her, "We think that was Prisoner Zero's guard".

The Doctor reached inside his pocket and pulled out the psychic paper, waving it around, "Whatever it was, it sent me a message," he informed them, "Psychic paper," he flipped it open and it glowed blue, "Takes a lovely little message," he frowned slightly as he read aloud, "'Prisoner Zero has escaped,'" he looked at the Hatter, who also frowned, "But why tell us?"

The Time Lady tilted her head thoughtfully, looking around, "Unless…" she trailed off, trying to keep the alarm out of her voice.

"Unless…what?" Amelia looked back and forth between them.

The Doctor meet the Hatter's eyes, thinking the same thing, "Unless Prisoner Zero escaped through here," he frowned, shaking his head, "But he couldn't have. We'd know".

They moved back out onto the landing, the Time Lords looking around the hall, "But surly I would have noticed," the Hatter remarked, frowning as she glanced at the Doctor, "You, I can understand. You're still new, everything's not quite working yet, but me?" she shook her head, looking frustrated at herself.

"And there's your answer," he looked at her, smiling slightly, "You've been so busy trying to look after me, and Amelia," he nodded down to the girl, who she was still holding hands with, "That you have got distracted".

She blinked at him, giving him an odd look, "That's what my Father said," she said softly, and he blinked in surprise, not having heard what her Father had said to her at the Naismith mansion, "He said I always got distracted so easily, even as a child," she took a deep breath, closing her eyes briefly, and nodded as she reopened them, "Okay, focus…" she muttered to herself, looking around the landing, her eyes narrowing, "There's…something right there, in the corner of my eye…"

Slowly, she and the Doctor turned on the spot, looking down the end of the hall, trying to break through a Perception Filter that had been placed on the door at the end of the hall, when the Cloister Bell suddenly sounded outside from the TARDIS, and they both jumped, startled.

The Doctor grabbed the Hatter's hand and they sprinted off down the hall, Amelia right behind them, "No!" they shouted urgently, running down the stairs, "No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!" they reached the bottom on the stairs, running for the doors, and threw them open, "We've got to get back in there!" they continued as they ran across the front garden, "The engines are phasing! It's going to burn!"

"But it's just a box!" Amelia called, right on their heels as they reached the TARDIS, frowning at it, "How can a box have engines?"

"That's because it's not just a box," the Hatter told her over her shoulder, helping the Doctor to undo the grappling hook, "It's actually a time machine…oh, and a space ship".

"What, a real one?" she questioned, doubtfully, "You've got a real time machine?"

They managed to undo the hook and began quickly collecting up the rest of the rope, "Not for much longer if we can't get her stabilised," the Doctor glanced back over to her as they chucked the rope and hook back inside the TARDIS, "Five minute hop into the future should do it".

The Time Lady cast the TARDIS a wary look, "Just as long as the console isn't to destroyed," she remarked quietly, and he paused, not seeming to have considered just how much damage had been caused.

Amelia watched them for a moment, "Can I come?" she asked hopefully.

"Not safe in here," he shook his head, "Not yet," he looked back over to her, giving her a small smile, "Five minutes, give us five minutes. We'll be right back".

"People always say that," she sighed heavily, dropping her eyes to the ground.

The Time Lords paused in what they were doing and stepped over to her, crouching down to her level, "Are we people?" the Doctor raised his eyebrows at her as the Time Lady gave her a comforting smile, "Do we even look like people?" she meet there eyes, "Trust us, we're the Doctor and the Hatter".

She smiled slowly at them and the Hatter ruffled her hair as the Doctor straightened, and ran over to the TARDIS, climbing back onto the edge. He looked back to Amelia, returning her smile, before grabbing the rope, "Geronimo!" he shouted, jumping down into the ship, the sound of something hitting water echoing up to them.

"Amelia, look at me," the blonde brought the girls attention back to her, meeting her eyes, "I promise you, we will come back, okay?" her eyes twinkled, "And I always keep my promises, remember?"

And with that, the Time Lady turned and followed after the Doctor, slamming the doors closed behind her as they dematerialised.

…

The TARDIS materialised back in Amelia's garden after their quick hop into the future, this time the proper way up. The Time Lords threw the doors open, smoke billowing out around them as they stumbled out, covering their mouths and noses.

The Hatter coughed as the doors closed behind them, quickly coming to a stop as she looked around to find that it was day time, and she was quite sure that the garden had been messier the last time they had been there, "Oh, dear…" she muttered to herself, her eyes widening slightly as she sensed that something very wrong had happened.

The Doctor also paused, casting his eyes around, but didn't seem to catch anything out of place, "Amelia!" he called loudly, removing the piece of cloth from his face, and grabbed the Time Lady's hand, "Amelia, we've worked out what it was!" they ran through the garden and up to the house, "We know what we were missing!" he pulled out the sonic as they reached the door, aiming it at the lock, but it seemed to glitch, "You've got to get out of there!"

"Doctor…" the Hatter began slowly, casting a look behind them towards the garden, "Doesn't this place…I don't know…seem off to you?"

He glanced at her, seeming confused, but before he could reply the door unlocked, "Amelia?" he called again as he threw the door open, and they ran inside, heading up the stairs, "Amelia, are you all right? Are you there?" they reached the door at the end of the hall that they had noticed the Perception Filter on, and began using the sonic on it, "Prisoner Zero's here," he checked the results, exchanging a look with the Time Lady, "Prisoner Zero is here!" he called even more urgently, "Prisoner Zero is here! Do you understand me? Prisoner Zero is…"

Suddenly, the floor boards creaked behind them, and they whirled around, only to be slammed across their faces by something quite hard, and everything faded to darkness…

….

The Hatter groaned as she slowly came back around, her head arching painfully as she groggily blinked to find herself looking at a tall woman, wearing a police uniform and hat, with a mini skirt, leaning against the staircase railing. She frowned at her, almost positive that police woman didn't wear miniskirts, since it seemed as if it would rather hard to chase down criminals in one, but she supposed that it was just an after effect of being knocked out…by a cricket bat, apparently, as she vaguely recalled seeing it heading towards her face.

She cast her eyes around the landing, trying to work out exactly why everything seemed so much bigger, when she realised that she was sitting on the floor, one wrist handcuffed to a radiator. She sighed slightly when she noticed the Doctor was in a similar state, sitting beside her, slowly blinking awake himself as his eyes flew across to her, seeming relieved to see her awake, and relatively unharmed. She even had her hat still on, which, or though nice, was odd. Perhaps the woman had shoved it back on, which would explain why it didn't sit quite right.

"White male and woman, mid-twenties, breaking and entering," the woman spoke into her police radio strapped to her front, eyeing them carefully, "Send me back-up. I've got them restrained. Oi!" she stepped closer to them, her voice turning stern, "You two, sit still".

The Doctor winced, "Cricket bat," he cleared his throat, glancing at the Time Lady, "Are you getting cricket bat?"

"Oh, my head certainly is," the blonde groaned again, nodding, "What would you're Fifth body say, I wonder?"

"Yeah…" he looked back to the woman, "We're getting…cricket…bat".

"You were breaking and entering," the woman replied.

He suddenly tried to leap up, not seeming to realise that he was handcuffed, and crashed back down, "Well, that's much better," he remarked, glancing down at the handcuff around his wrist, his eyes traveling along to the other cuff to see it around the Time Lady's wrist, "Brand new me," he looked back up to the woman, "Whack on the head, just what I needed".

The Hatter cast him a look, raising her eyebrows, "All you had to do was ask, sweetheart".

"Do you two want to shut up now?" the woman frowned at them, "I've got back up on the way".

"Hang on, no, wait," he shook his head, "You're a policewoman".

"And you're breaking and entering. You see how this works?"

"No, but what about Amelia?" the Hatter asked her, trying to look around the rest of the hall, hoping with both her hearts that her suspicion wasn't right, "Please, just tell us where she is?"

Something in the woman's face changed and seemed to look at them even more intently, "Amelia Pond?"

"Yeah, Amelia," the Doctor nodded, growing more worried.

"She's the sweet, little Scottish girl," the Time Lady continued, tilting her head at the woman, finding her reaction quite…interesting, "She has red hair and green eyes…" she trailed off slightly, noticing that the woman before them had the same shade green eyes.

"Where is she?" he questioned, not noticing that the blonde seemed to be looking at the woman even more carefully, "We promised her five minutes, but the engines were phasing. I suppose we could have gone a bit far," he remarked, glancing at the blonde, a frown settling on his face, "Has something happened to her?"

The woman stared at them, looking wary, "Amelia Pond hasn't lived here in a long time".

"Exactly how long?" the Hatter swallowed apprehensively.

"Six months".

"No," the Doctor tried to laugh her off, glancing at the Hatter, as if he was expecting to see her smiling, only to see her looking at the woman with a sort of grim reassignment, "No, no, no!" he looked back to the woman, "We can't be six months late! We said five minutes. We promised, and the Hatter never breaks a promise," he nodded to the blonde, "It's sort of her thing, like hats."

The woman turned away from them, preparing to speak into her radio, "What happened to her?" the Time Lady called to her urgently, trying to move forwards, only to be pulled back by the handcuff, "Please, just tell us what happened to Amelia Pond?"

She simply kept her back to them, lifting the radio, "Sarge, it's me again," she said over it, "Hurry it up. These two know something about Amelia Pond".

"We need to speak to whoever lives in this house right now," the Doctor demanded as the woman turned back around to face them, hands on her hips.

"I live here".

He blinked, "But you're the police!"

The Hatter nudged his side with her free arm, "Even the police have homes, Doctor," she reminded him, sounding slightly amused.

"Yes, and this is where I live," the woman agreed, narrowing her eyes at him, "Have you got a problem with that?"

"How many rooms?" the Doctor suddenly asked her, glancing behind her to the door at the end of the hall.

She stared at him as if he was mad, "I'm sorry, what?"

"He means on this floor," the Time Lady clarified, raising her eyebrows at her, "How many rooms are on this floor? Go on, count them".

"Why?"

They meet her eyes, very serious, "Because it will change your life," they told her simply.

"Five," she replied, and began pointing to them, "One, two, three, four, five…"

"Six," the Doctor corrected.

"Six?" she repeated, confused and slightly startled.

"Look".

"Look where?"

"To the very place you don't want to," the Hatter replied, watching her reaction closely as her face grew almost fearful, "The place you never want to look, in the corner of your eye".

"Look behind you," the Doctor added.

Slowly, she turned her head to look at the door, "That's…that's not possible," she shook her head, finally able to see the door, "How's that possible?"

"There's something called a Perception Filter around the door," the Time Lady explained to her, glancing at the Doctor, "The last time we were here, we sensed it," she sighed, looking annoyed at herself, "But we…I should have actually seen it".

"But that's a whole room," she breathed, still staring at it, "That's a whole room I've never noticed".

"The filter stops you noticing," the Doctor told her, talking quickly, "Something came a while ago too hid. It's still hiding, and you need to uncuff us now!"

She began walking towards the door, "I don't have the key," she informed them, not seeming to be listening, "I lost it".

"Oh, wonderful," the Hatter sighed heavily, rolling her eyes before she realised what the other woman was doing, "No!" she called to her hurriedly, "Stay away from that door!"

"Do not touch that door!" the Doctor continued, leaning around to watch as the woman, completely ignoring them, placed her hand on the door handle, "Listen to me, do not open that…" he waved his hand around in frustration as she turned the handle, glancing at the Hatter, "Why does no one ever listen to me?" the woman stepped into the room, "Do I have a face that nobody listens to?" he sighed, rethinking what he had just said, "…again".

The Time Lady glanced at him, considering what he had said as she eyed his face, "I don't know about that, but it is…interesting".

He paused and looked at her, raising an eyebrow, "Interesting how?"

She went to answer, but shook her head as she remembered the woman that was in danger, "Let's discuss this later, sweetheart," she cleared her throat, frowning down at the handcuffs, "Sonic?"

"Ah!" he began searching through his pockets with his free hand, frowning when he didn't find it, "My screwdriver, where is it?" he called down the hall and through the open doorway, growing slightly frantic, "Silver thing, blue at the end. Where did it go?"

"There's nothing here," the woman called back.

"Think about it!" the Hatter told her, "There's something in there and it's stopping you from seeing an entire room, so why would you think you could see it?" her voice turned deeply concerned, "Now, come back here, please! It's not safe!"

"Silver, blue at the end?"

"My screwdriver, yeah," the Doctor nodded, frowning down the hall.

"It's here".

He exchanged a quick look with the blonde, who looked even more alarmed, "Must've have rolled under the door".

"Oh, I don't think so," the Time Lady murmured.

"Yeah…" the woman's voice turned tense, "Must've…and then it must have jumped on the table".

The Time Lords stared at the door, "Get out of there," they told her, a note of fear entering their voices for the woman, "Get out of there!" they shouted when she didn't seem to listen, "Get out! Get out of there!" they both tried to pull away from the radiator, "What is it?" they paused in their attempts to stretch forwards, realising that something else must be going on in the room, "What are you doing?"

"There's nothing here, but…" she trailed off.

"Remember, the corner of your eye," the Hatter reminded her grimly.

"What is it?" she asked fearfully.

"Don't look at it!" she called to her quickly, "Don't even try to see it, because if it knows that you've seen it, then it will kill you!"

"Don't look at it!" the Doctor agreed, raising his voice, "Do not look".

There was nothing and then…she screamed.

"Get out!" he shouted, and the woman finally did as they told her, running out of the room, and slamming the door behind her as she raced back over to them, "Give me that," he held out his hand, noticing she had the sonic, and she handed it to him. He pointed it back at the door, and it glitched for a moment before finally working, locking the door before he focused on the handcuffs, "Come on," he muttered, frowning at the sonic, "What has the bad alien done to you?"

"Here, let me," the Hatter held out her hand, and he passed it to her, watching as she quickly examined it.

The woman stared, wide eyed at the closed door, "Will that door hold it?" she glanced at them.

"Oh, yeah, yeah, of course," the Doctor looked up at her, rolling his eyes sarcastically, "It's an interdimensional multiform from outer space," he scoffed as Hatter, managing to get the sonic to work, set to work undoing the cuffs again, "They're all terrified of wood".

The Time Lady glanced at him, looking amused, "Ooh, looks like someone's developed a bit of a sarcastic side," she remarked, giving him a cheeky wink, "I like it".

"Oh, yeah," he glanced at her, looking pleased with himself, "And have I ever mentioned how much I love…"

"What's that?" the woman cut across him, her voice growing even more fearful as a golden light appeared under the door from within the room, "What's it doing?"

"I don't know," he glanced over to the door as the Time Lady, grumbling, tried to clean the sonic, "Getter dressed?" he shrugged, "Run. Just go," he told her, "Your back up's coming. We'll be fine".

"There is no back up," she admitted.

He looked at her sharply, "I heard you on the radio," he frowned, "You call for back up," he looked to the Hatter, "You heard her, too?"

The Hatter nodded, casting the woman a long look, "Yes, but I don't think she's actually a policewoman," she raised her eyebrows at her, and she gave her a surprised look as the Doctor's mouth fell open, "Just look at that skirt, no real policewoman would have one that short".

"No, but…" he shook his head, looking back and forth between the two woman.

The woman sighed, realising her trick was up, "I'm a kiss-o-gram," and she pulled off her hat, letting her long, red hair fall down before tossing the hat in the air. Suddenly, the door at the end of the hall flew open and a man with a large dog stepped out, staring at them, "But it's just…" she trailed off, looking at them.

"Look closer," the Time Lady instructed her, "Look at their faces, really look".

A growling sound came from the pair and she looked at the dog, only to see that it wasn't doing anything, when the man began barking at them.

"What?" the woman gasped, taking a small step back, "I'm sorry, but…what?" she looked to the Time Lords.

"It's all one creature," the Doctor explained, smiling slightly, "One creature disguised as two. Clever multi-form".

The Hatter tilted her head at it, "Yes, but it got itself a bit mixed up," she commented, nodding between the man and the dog, "The voices aren't quite right, still…" she frowned, looking curious, "I do wounder were you got the pattern from? You would need a psych link, basically, a live feed. A hospital, perhaps?"

The man growled and stepped towards them, opening his mouth to reveal very long, sharp teeth as the woman gasped again, startled.

"Stay, boy!" the Doctor ordered, trying to shift closer to the Hatter as she struggled to try undoing the handcuffs, "Her and us," he nodded from the red head to the blonde, "We're safe. Want to know why? She sent for back up," he nodded to the red head again.

"I didn't send for back up!" the woman exclaimed.

The Time Lady groaned loudly, almost beating her head against the wall behind her.

"I know," the Doctor sighed, glancing at the red head, "That was a clever lie to save our lives," he looked back to the multi-form, "Okay, yeah, no back up," he nodded, "And that's why we're safe. Alone, we're not a threat to you, if we had back up, you'd have to kill us".

"Attention, Prisoner Zero," a voice announced from outside, causing them to pause, "The human residence is surrounded," the Time Lady groaned even louder, closing her eyes tightly, "Attention, Prisoner Zero. The human residence is surrounded…"

"What's that?" the woman whispered, glancing at them.

"That would be back up," the Time Lady replied with a false, cheerful tone.

"Okay, one more time," the Doctor tried again, "We do have back up and that's definitely why we're safe".

"Prisoner Zero will vacate the human residence or the human residence will be incinerated".

"Oh, yeah, perfectly safe," the Hatter agreed, glancing at him, looking almost amused, "Never mind the incineration part".

He meet her eyes and grinned as Prisoner Zero walked into a different room.

"Prisoner Zero will vacate the human residence, or the human residence will be incinerated".

The Time Lady shook her head and focused her attention back on the sonic, hitting it against her palm, "Oh, come on, work," she grumbled as she pointed it back at the cuffs, the light on the end flickering. Finally, it started working again, and the cuffs around her wrist snapped open, and she quickly aimed it at the Doctor's, releasing him, "Okay, I suggest we run now!" she told the other two as she jumped to her feet, tossing the sonic to the Doctor as he followed.

"Run!" he grabbed the woman's hand, and then the Time Lady's, heading for the stairs. The Time Lords paused in the door way that the other alien had entered, checking to make sure it was still there, before racing down the stairs, after the red head.

They reached the front door, throwing it open, and darted outside, the Doctor flashing his sonic at the door to lock it.

"Seriously, a kiss-o-gram?" the blonde remarked, glancing at the red head with her eyebrows raised, sounding amused.

"Yes, a kiss-o-gram!" the woman nodded, "Work through it".

The Doctor finished with the door and whirled around to look at her, "Why'd you pretend to be a policewoman?"

"You broke into my house," she replied, shrugging slightly as they hurried through the garden, "It was this or the French maid! What's going on? Tell me," she demanded as they reached the TARDIS, "Tell me!"

"An alien convict is hiding in your spare room disguised as man and a dog, and some other aliens are about to incinerate your house".

The Hatter glanced over her shoulder at her, "Any questions?"

"Yes!"

"Me too," the Doctor began trying to unlock the TARDIS, "No!" he exclaimed when the doors refused to budge, "No, no, no! Don't do that, not now!"

"She's still rebuilding," the Time Lady sighed heavily, patting the doors gently as she eyed the smoke still billowing out of the smashed windows, "She's going to need more time before she can let us in".

"Prisoner Zero will vacate the human residence, or the human residence will be incinerated".

The woman looked back to her house as she heard the alien barking at them from the upstairs bedroom, "Come on!" she grabbed the Doctor and the Hatter's arms, trying to pull them away.

"No, stop!" the Hatter pulled her arm back, catching sight of a garden shed just off to the side of the garden, frowning at it, "The last time we were here, I remember we destroyed that shed".

The Doctor followed her gaze, breaking free of the red heads grip, and running over to the shed, "Smashed it to pieces," he agreed, eyeing it.

"So there's a new one!" the woman shrugged, trying to usher them away from it, "Let's go!"

"Yeah, but the new one's got old," he commented, waving his hands around at it as the Time Lady leaned closer towards the wooden shed, giving it a sniff. Her eyes widened slightly as she turned around to face the red head, "It's ten years old at least!"

"Twelve, actually," the Hatter informed him, still looking at the woman, and he spun around to face her, too, "We're not six months late, we're twelve years late," she breathed.

Prisoner Zero barked again, "He's coming," the woman glanced back over to her house, trying to distract them.

"You said six months," the Doctor stepped closer to her, his tone accusing, "Why did you say six months?"

"We've got to go…"

"No, because this is very, very important," the Time Lady shook her head, tilting her head at her, dearly hoping that what she had suspected for a while, what everything had been pointing to, wasn't right, "Please, just tell us why you said six months?"

"Why did you say five minutes?" she suddenly shouted, looking hurt and angry as her British accent disappeared, replaced with a Scottish one.

The blonde closed her eyes, "Oh, Amelia…" she murmured, opening them again to look at her sadly.

The Doctor gaped at her, "What?" he whispered, staring at the woman before him in a completely new light.

Amelia, looking slightly shocked with herself, swallowed, "Come on".

"What?"

"Come on!" she grabbed their arms again, pulling them back through her garden.

"What?"

The Hatter gave herself a sharp shake, "Explanations later, sweetheart," she told him quickly, "Running now!"

They followed Amelia as she led them back up through the garden, running past the front door as it burst open, and Prisoner Zero appeared.

"Prisoner Zero will vacate the human residence, or the human residence will be incinerated…"

….

They raced up the driveway of Amelia's house, and onto a village road, when the Time Lords stopped, looking back to her, "You're Amelia," the Doctor blinked at her, still finding it hard to believe.

Amelia walked past them, casting them annoyed looks, "And you're late".

"Amelia Pond," he chased after her, linking his arm through the Hatter's, "You're the little girl".

"I'm Amelia and you're late".

"What happened?" the Hatter asked, eyeing her.

"Twelve years," she replied angrily.

"You hit us with a cricket bat!" the Doctor exclaimed.

"Twelve years!"

"A cricket bat!"

She scoffed slightly, "Twelve years, and four psychiatrists".

"Really?" the Time Lady looked at her, startled, "Four of them?" she shook her head, trying to lighten the mood, "What did you do, bite them or something?"

Amelia hesitated, glancing back at her, looking slightly embarrassed, "…yeah…"

The blonde's eyes widened in surprise, "Oh, that…that was only meant to be a joke," she coughed.

The Doctor glanced at her, looking amused, "Why?" he questioned, looking back to Amelia.

Amelia sighed, looking away, "They said you weren't real".

"Prisoner Zero will vacate the human residence, or the human residence will be incinerated," the voice announced again over the speakers on an ice cream van, parked just ahead of them in what appeared to be the village green.

"No, no, no, come on," Amelia stared at the van, her eyes widening, "What? We're being staked out by an ice cream van".

"Prisoner Zero will vacate the human residence, or the human residence will be incinerated…"

The Time Lords exchanged a look and ran over to the van, "What's that?" they asked the vendor, who was looking up at the speakers, confused, "Why are you playing that?"

The man shook his head at them, "It's supposed to be Claire De Lune".

The Doctor grabbed a radio that was sitting in the van, holding it up, "Prisoner Zero will vacate the human residence, or the human residence will be incinerated…" the voice came over it, too, repeating the same thing.

"Doctor, look," the Hatter grabbed his hand, nodding over to where a woman was standing, frowning down at an iPod, and across to where another woman was looking confused at her mobile phone, "They're using everything and anything with speakers," she realised, hearing the same words being repeated.

"Doctor, Hatter, what's happening?" Amelia turned towards them, having followed there gazes.

The Time Lords looked at each other, glancing back to her, before they raced across the road, and over to a house with a white, picket fence around it, Amelia following. They jumped over the fence, the Doctor pausing to help the Time Lady, and ran inside the house to find an elderly woman standing before her TV, clicking her remote at it, trying to get rid of the large, blue eyeball that was flashing across the screen.

"Prisoner Zero will vacate the human residence, or the human residence will be incinerated…" the voice called over the screen.

"Hello!" the Doctor greeted the woman as she looked over to them, surprised, "Sorry to burst in," the Hatter moved past them, giving the woman a small smile as she moved closer to the TV, examining behind it, "We're doing a special on television faults in this are…" Amelia ran inside the room, and he glanced at her, "…also, crimes. Let's have a look," he moved over to the Time Lady.

"I was just about to phone," the woman informed the Time Lords, "It's on every channel. Oh, hello, Amy dear," she smiled as she glanced at Amelia, before she frowned slightly at her outfit, "Are you a policewoman now?"

"We'll sometimes," Amelia nodded, awkwardly.

"I thought you were a nurse".

The Doctor and the Hatter paused, exchanging a look as they looked over to the red head, raising their eyebrows.

"I can be a nurse…" she agreed slowly.

The woman cast her a long look, "Or, actually, a nun?"

She tried to laugh her off as the Time Lady coughed, struggling to hold back a laugh, "I dabble".

The woman nodded, seeming to decide to let it go, "Amy, who is your friends?" she nodded to the Time Lords.

"Who's Amy?" the Doctor asked, looking over to her, "You were Amelia".

"Yeah?" Amy shrugged, shifting slightly, "Now I'm Amy".

"But Amelia Pond was a lovely name," the Hatter frowned, looking sad as the Doctor nodded in agreement.

She meet there eyes, "Bit fairy tale," she remarked.

The older woman eyed the Time Lords, "I know you both, don't I?" she smiled pleasantly, "I've seen you somewhere before".

"Not me," the Doctor shook his head, looking at her, "Brand new face. First time on," he opened his mouth wide to show her his face, the Hatter stared at him slightly, wondering just how much more insane he could possibly get as he snapped his mouth shut again, "And what sort of job's a kiss-o-gram?" he looked over to Amy.

"I go to parties and I…kiss people," she replied, clearing her throat, "…with outfits. It's a laugh".

"You were a little girl five minutes ago!" the Time Lords looked at her sharply.

"You're worse than my Aunt!"

"I'm the Doctor and she's the Hatter, we're worse than everybody's Aunt," the Doctor told her sternly, the Hatter raised her eyebrows at him, amused. He paused, glancing at the older woman, "And that is not how I'm introducing us," he lowered his voice slightly.

"Well, it would certainly be a memorable introduction," the Hatter commented, laughing.

He sent her a smile and picked up a radio, flashing his sonic at it, switching it to different channels as the same message came over, only in different languages, "Okay, so it's everywhere, in every language," he sat the radio back down, nodding slowly, "They're broadcasting to the whole world".

"Oh, this really isn't good," the Time Lady sighed heavily, running across the room, and over to a window. She opened it and stuck her head out, looking up at the sky.

"What's up there?" Amy asked as they followed her, "What are you looking for?"

She didn't answer as she pulled herself back inside the room, one hand going up to fiddle with her battered, slightly bloody bowtie. Never a good sign.

"Okay," the Doctor sighed, moving away from the window, "Planet this size, two poles, your basic molten core…"

"They're going to need…oh, about a forty percent fission blast," the Time Lady estimated thoughtfully, nodding slowly, just as a young man entered the room with a laptop bag over his shoulder.

The Doctor walked over to him, peering closely at the man's face, "But they'll have to power up first, won't they?" he continued, not seeming to notice the other man's discomfort, "So assuming a medium size starship, that's twenty minutes. What do you think, twenty minutes?" he asked the man, not waiting for him to reply, "Yeah, twenty minutes," he looked back over to the others, "We've got twenty minutes".

Amy frowned at them, looking back and forth between the two Time Lords, "Twenty minutes to what?"

"Are you the Doctor and the Hatter?" the man asked suddenly, glancing over to the Time Lady, and seeming to pause slightly as his eyes lingered on her.

The Doctor cleared his throat, giving him a sharp look, while the Time Lady didn't even seem to notice.

"They are, aren't they?" the older woman smiled brightly, "They're the Doctor and the Hatter!" Amy cringed, "The Raggedy Doctor, and the Shabby Hatter!" the Time Lady paused, mothing the words, 'Shabby Hatter, "All those cartoons you did when you were little," the woman looked at Amy, who was still cringing, "The Raggedy Doctor and the Shabby Hatter. It's them!"

Amy cleared her throat, highly embarrassed, "Shut up," she whispered.

"I don't look that bad, do I?" the Hatter questioned, looking down at herself, sighing slightly as she realised that yes, she really did, with her waistcoat hanging open, the buttons having fallen off along the way, the blood still splattered down her front, and all the rips. Still, at least her hat, which was actually a spare, having lost the originally, looked fine.

"…cartoons?" the Doctor repeated slowly, eyeing Amy, before he shook himself and moved to sit on the sofa, the Time Lady quickly joining him.

"Gran, it's them, isn't it?" the man smiled broadly as he moved closer to the older woman, apparently his Grandmother, his eyes coming to rest on the blonde, much to the Doctor's annoyance. Once again, the Time Lady didn't seem to notice, "It's really them!"

"Jeff, shut up," Amy hissed, looking over to the Time Lords, "Twenty minutes to what?"

"…the human residence will be incinerated," the voice called over the TV.

The Hatter sighed, glancing over to the humans, "The human residence…" she gestured to the TV screen, "It's not just referring to your house, but the entire planet".

"Somewhere up there," the Doctor nodded, looking up at the ceiling, "There's a spaceship, and it's going to incinerate the planet".

"…will be incinerated. Repeat, Prisoner Zero will vacate the human residence, or the human residence will be incinerated…"

The Time Lords exchanged a look, saying in unison, "Twenty minutes to the end of the world".

Next chapter, the Doctor gets a new sonic, the Hatter puts an old hobby to good use, and tea on the moon? Tell me what you thought, please review :)