"KATE!" Max woke up with as much sweat on her as the bay had water in it. These nightmares were so hard to deal with, and this one was the straw that broke the camel's back. You can only watch a friend die so much without breaking down.
It was hard to breathe; she was coughing and gasping for air, tears streaming down her face. She was shaking so violently her laptop's open screen was rocking a little. She reached for her cell but missed from her violent quivering. She reached again, grasping it and bringing it closer. She tried concentrating on her breathing.
She moved down the contacts list, she could try Warren, but he was probably asleep. She could also try Chloe; which she settled on.
"Chloe I need u bad in my dorm room"
A few seconds passed and a buzz brought her attention back to her phone
"R U okay?! I'm on my way! Did you get hurt?!"
"not hurt, just get here fast"
Chloe walked in instead of knocking, seeing Max breathing heavily and shaking like it was -30. She sat down next to her and grabbed her in a tight hug. She knew panic attacks; she'd had them dozens of times. She'd let Max calm down a little before she asked what was wrong.
"It's MY fault Chloe! I was so close! She was about to step down!" Max sobbed into Chloe's chest.
"I was so damn close! Why couldn't I save her?!"
"Max, it's not your fault. I swear it's not your fault. I know how you feel, and you know better than anyone, even mom, that I do." She hugged Max even tighter. Chloe guessed it was around 2 in the morning, but she didn't much care. Max needed her, and she was always up this late anyway.
"But I was RIGHT THERE! Why didn't she come with me..why?" she was still crying, but not sobbing at least; though she could resume at any moment. Her face was stained with tear streaks and a dull pink. Chloe desperately wished she could make her stop. But she knew this feeling, this awful pain; the death of a loved one.
"Because she didn't want to. Her mind was set, Max. I have no idea how she felt, I've never had a..video..posted online." She'd been drugged before though, back when she hung out with Frank. To his credit, he wasn't the one who did it, and when they found out who did, Frank almost killed them. Even with that "gracious" act, he was still a dick.
"But I know how sad she must have been to do it." Chloe looked out Max's window to the building where Kate Marsh had fallen, reliving something. She didn't have to say anything; Max knew. She'd tried before.
Chloe rested her chin on Max's head.
"Max, I'm not going to lie to you. You'll never get better; the pain will never go completely away. You'll have good days and bad days, sometimes it won't be on your mind for a really long time; sometimes it'll be on your mind for days. So I won't promise you that it gets better, or easier; I will promise that I'll never leave you. You can always text me. You can always call me. You can always come to my house, no matter what step-douche says about It; even if we have a fight and I say I don't want to see you."
"Promise?" Max finished with a sniffle.
"I promise Cauliflower."
Max smiled at Chloe's nickname for her. She knew Chloe had forgiven her for leaving. She might be an ass and say it when she was mad, but she didn't mean it.
Max had stopped crying actual tears, but she still made crying noises; loud sharp inhales, sniffles, and silent cough like exhales. Even though Max was crying, Chloe loved this; quite a lot less than normal, but still. Just. Having Max back was like having happy pills, she made Chloe feel better than any high she'd ever had. There were feelings there, in her heart, but now was NOT the time to let Max know. She could react in a good way, and share the feelings, or in a bad way, and act different towards the blue haired rebel. Chloe couldn't bear that, and besides, Max needed comfort, not drama.
"It's just the image; it won't stop playing in my head. I feel like it's my fault because I couldn't rewind anymore, if I could have, I would have said the right thing. And now everybody's giving out totally fake grievances, when I was the only person who even TRIED to get up there. Everybody else was too busy taking vids and pics, probably to sell to the news or some shit." Max barely cursed back when they were kids, and she didn't do it much more often now; she was mad that she was the only one being affected like this.
"I know what you're talkin' about, Max. when I first started looking for Rachel-"
"You aren't still mad at her?" Max hoped she wasn't. Rachel was the only reliable thing Chloe had while she was gone. She desperately wanted to thank the blond for being there for her best friend. More recently, Max had wanted to talk to Chloe about the possibility of being more than "best friends." Since she'd gotten back, Chloe had flirted a lot; granted sometimes it was just playful, but Max had caught her look at the pool last night. She did get to Blackwell with a Scholarship, after all. Plus, Chloe hadn't changed much, save her appearance. She knew her childhood friend. Even after five way-too-long years.
"I'm still hella pissed at her, but it's not like I wont let her explain herself." Max smiled a little under Chloe's chin, all Chloe ever was, was a forgiver. She'd take the blame for Max all the time. And she'd obviously forgiven her for leaving. And that's why I have feelings for her. Because even though she's as tall as a tree, and gotten hair to match her eyes, she was still the same. Her Chloe.
"Thank you, Chloe. For. Whatever this is. That was the first time I ever freaked out like that. I was just really scared."
"Hmph, don't try and push me out so soon Caulfield. Cause you're not better, not all the way. Not leaving till you are." But you said im never going to get better, right? Is there a second meaning there? No, no probably not.
"I'm sorry it's so late, I just…couldn't get the image out of my head; and you're the only one in Arcadia Bay who would come here." "I hope she didn't get my double meaning there. She's a nerd though, she might figure it out."
"Psh, no worries. I was already up, and I was hella bored. Plus it wouldn't matter if you'd woken me up, you're my girl! I wouldn't leave you in your room having panic attacks or whatever else might happen."
Max smiled. She looked at Chloe doing the same down at her; they were on Max's bed, Chloe leaning against the wall and Max snuggling close to her; Chloe holding her with a surprisingly strong arm. Max thanked whatever might exist as "god" that she didn't wear make-up. She'd look even worse right now if she did.
"Chloe, im sorry I asked you to come, I know we had a fight..I should have asked Warren first at least, and done a rewind if he was sleeping.."
"Don't start with me Caulfield. That wasn't a fight; it was me throwing a tantrum. Besides like I said, I'll always come for you. Yeah, if you could you might have asked the guy, but you were having a panic attack, there's no way you could think too clearly, especially since it's your first one. I should apologize to you; I didn't mean what I said in my truck. You could have called sure, but so could I. It's not like you changed your number. Plus it's the internet age dude; I could have found you on facebook or something. Let's just say it was both our faults and call it a draw. You're here now and that's all I need."
Max had snuggled back into Chloe's chest. She smelled like pine trees and smoke and watermelon and the bay. Max suddenly became very aware of how sparsely she was dressed, in her underwear and her baggy shirt that she always wore to bed. Chloe hadn't seemed to care, but Max was a little embarrassed that her best friend was so close while she was undressed; they'd been comfortable enough to change in front of each other since they became teens, but right now they were a lot closer than usual. For a longer period than usual.
"Chloe. You can leave if you want."
"Nope, I'm not leaving tonight; I'll sleep on your floor if I have to. Besides, I wanna see your room. And it's not like you got class tomorrow, so I'll help you clean that." She pointed to the large red "NOBODY MESSES WITH ME BITCH" on Max's photo wall.
"Ten bucks says that was Prisscott."
"And we have a winner, miss Price what do you pick as your prize?"
"Rewinding with you would be pretty cool, seeing how people react to me knowing their secrets."
"Well it's not like im the NSA Chlo!" they both laughed
"I didn't mean that, jerk! I meant like. What if I found out where David hides his porn? That'd be hella awesome!" They both laughed again.
"I don't have much to do tomorrow anyway, so I guess you can stay. I'm tellin ya, you're gonna die of boredom by noon."
"Psh, dude I SLEEP till noon!" Max smiled again. That smile made Chloe's heart feel mended. She could forget about her father, about David, about Frank, about Rachel. Her stone cold walls around her soul crumbled, and she felt like the sun was shining directly on her, during a cold day. She was definitely crushing. That kiss earlier today, the one she didn't expect Max to take her up on, had sealed the deal. She didn't care if they did anything. She just liked being with Max. Her bed smelled like her, her room smelled like the outside air; obviously she kept her window open. Chloe loved this moment. She wondered, in a very hopeful way, if Max was rewinding this moment, so she could live it over and over. Or if she'd ever rewound any other moments. "Fuck it, ill ask her."
"Hey Max? Can I ask you a question?"
"Sure, I at least owe you that." That smile again…damn her.
"Since we started hanging out again…have you ever…used your power to like…rewind moments? Like…to keep living them?" Max smiled a little.
"Nope, I've thought about it but never done it. I guess it's because I don't want to be selfish." Selfish?! Chloe could only give a confused look. Screw this girl and her adorable selflessness.
"How in the hell would it be selfish? It's not like I'd know."
"That's the point Chloe. If I rewind moments like that, you wouldn't know. You wouldn't be able to keep reliving them with me, it's like they never happened to you, and you're just starting them. For all I know, you keep re-thinking that you wish you could re-live the moments."
Chloe couldn't take it. Max was just as nice as before she left. Just as sweet. If they were dating, Chloe would attack her with a heavy make out right now. She really didn't want to tell Max how she felt right now. Max still needed her, and if she got mad, or creeped out, Chloe would have to leave. "some rebel I am." Chloe thought.
"That's…really sweet Max. Thank you."
"I did rewind that kiss though-"
"WHAT?!" Max laughed, which felt really good. She was still a little shakey and far from feeling fine. But she could tell the panic attack had, for the most part, subsided.
"Calm down, it was just funny to see your face. Being called hardcore a bunch didn't hurt much either." Half-truth. She definitely relished that kiss as long as she could. She'd never kissed a girl before. Or anyone, and depending on what she did, sometimes Chloe leaned in a bit.
"WELL…ugh. Can't believe you assaulted me you creep." Chloe added way too much sarcasm, just so Max wouldn't the wrong idea.
"Not like you hated it." Brrrrruuuuuuuuuuuuu. Chloe giggled in her own way, Max's stomach had given up her lead in their sass-off.
"Ugggggh. I'll just eat some snack I have in here. I don't want to go to a vending machine. Do you want something?"
"You got beer?"
"Chloe. You know I don't. you dweeb."
"Fine jeez, what do you have?"
"Some chips, some crackers, a bag of candy aaaaaand bottled water."
"Wow. So not-hardcore. All right, all right, gimme a water and some candy, chocolate sounds hella good."
"Hella is like your catchphrase." Max giggled a little, melting Chloe's heart again.
"it's cause you can use it for everything! I don't know why people ever stopped using it, it's my favorite word ever." She took a drink of water and some dribbled out of the corner of her mouth, she was about to wipe it off with her shirt, but Max wiped it off with a napkin.
"You're so not lady-like." She giggled and smiled again, her comment and her little laugh made Chloe blush, she prayed Max didn't notice, even though she was looking right at her.
"Who likes ladies anyway, I'm into maidens bro. like warrior maidens. Like you."
"Like me? Oh I get it you're into me then!" she laughed and wrapped her arms around her stomach. Chloe hoped she wasn't serious.
"No! I just meant that you're really strong and smart and stuff!"
"Oh so you don't like me then?" She made an over exaggerated putting face.
"NO! I like you! Like as a friend! Not that I wouldn't date you-!" Max popped an M&M and laughed.
"Calm down dummy, you'll just dig a deeper hole for yourself."
"Can I get some rope?"
"Nope. Sorry, just ran out."
"Dang it." They both laughed, Chloe thankful that Max seemed not to notice that she totally was crushing.
They finished their snacks and cleaned the room, just a little, so Chloe could sleep on the floor; though it was Chloe who cleared the floor.
"Why'd you clear the floor? You aren't sleeping there. I refuse to let you. Sides, who knows if I could have another bad dream. I need you for comfort." Max said it in such an absolute way, Chloe couldn't say no. but Max also just wanted to cuddle her again. It was so nice, she felt at least a billion times better while Chloe held her; and Chloe felt the same. It was now 4 AM with most of the 2 hours that had passed being spent on comforting Max, so they were both plenty tired. Chloe stole a shirt and stripped down to her underwear, putting the shirt on. She really, really, didn't want to sweat any more than she was going to. She crawled over Max and awkwardly got under the covers, bouncing a little to get into a comfortable position. She hugged Max closer so that she could be the little spoon. Both of them were completely unaware that each one really wanted a goodnight kiss from the other. Max didn't even think about Kate while she slept; her thoughts were all about Chloe, as well as her dreams. She dreamed about their kiss earlier, the pool, their hugs, Chloe's smell, Chloe telling her that she loved her, feeling her soft skin, her blue hair, her strong and slender arms wrapping around Max's waist. She dreamed of everything perfect. Chloe wasn't so lucky.
Chloe couldn't move, she didn't know why, she looked down and her foot was stuck under a car's wheel, things were very fuzzy, and it she almost couldn't find out where she was. The car looked rusty, there were parts of mechanical things everywhere. She looked around lazily to see a blurry Max, standing in front of someone….Frank? He was holding something, black and metal. "Oh god no, the gun!" Chloe tried her hardest to get out from under the car but she could barely even move her arms, she tried to call out, to tell Frank she'd get his money. She couldn't even speak.
"Think you can point guns at me?! Think you can threaten me, you skank?!"
"I'm sorry! I just didn't want you to hurt Chlo-"
Boom
Chloe tried to call out again, everything went into slow motion. Max was on the ground, slowly bleeding, why was she rewinding?! Why wasn't she fixing this?! "She can't! Oh god! Please Max! GET UP!" but she didn't. Frank walked over to her. It seemed like it took forever. When he got over to her, he lifted the gun. Through her tears, Chloe saw him bring the hammer down.
"I better get my money bitch, or else you're mommy's gonna the same treatment."
Boom.