Title: Love Lost

Author: Cat

Rating: PG-13 some bad language

Status: Finished

Summary: Post FIN fiction…..What happens to a broken heart?

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters from the Xena Warrior Princess show or Hercules the Legendary Adventures. I do however own the story line.

Note: I haven't decided if this is finished or not, might have a sequel.

Comments can be sent to Cutekitty74@yahoo.com

I Won't Forget You

Poison

From the Album "Look What The Cat Dragged In"

Late at night I close my eyes
And think of how things could have been
And when I look back
I remember some words you had said to me

It's better to have lost at love
Then never to have loved at all

Chorus
I won't forget you baby
(I won't forget you)
Even though I should
I won't forget you baby
(I won't forget you)
Even though I should, yeah

Sometimes in my head
I can still see pictures of you
And I laugh to myself
When I think of all those crazy things that we used to do

Although miles come between us
Just between you and me

Chorus

I should let you fade away
But that just wouldn't be me
Oh, baby

Solo

Although miles come between us
Just between you and me

I won't forget you baby
(I won't forget you)
Memories slowly fade
I won't forget you baby
(I won't forget you)
And all the plans we made

I won't forget you baby

Do you feel that your deed brought your redemption, I fear it has not. The world that I returned to from that mountain top was not the one we left not long ago. Your death brought much pain to those who loved as well as confusion. Darkness filled the void left by the love you denied him. You left him hanging, didn't you. A chance was all he said he had, but you never intended to give that to him. The anger and rage he felt were too much, it overcame him. You thought their reign would end with the coming of another, but it did not, it just changed. You left a world with destruction to create a world of even more lost than before. His heart broke and the release caused worse pain than you could of imagined. I sit here now in my last hours, picking up my quill and scroll for the last time to write this. What ever peace you found, I am glad. I just wished you would have completed the journey here first. I love you as a sister, friend and soul mate, but I don't know if I can forgive that act so long ago. In the wake of your death he brought new ways of destruction and I fear for humanity. Those who have tried to talk to him are dead or scared. I brought him the news when I returned and have walked this land with a crippled leg from his wrath. Of course he blamed me, that I failed you, but I think his rage has turned to you and your betrayal. Do not take me wrong my friend, your deed was noble, but I feel misplaced and mistimed. My heart grows weak and my hand as well. I will pass soon, so now I will end this letter in hopes of seeing your blue eyes again. Goodbye yet hello again my friend.

Gabrielle Battling Bard, Friend of Xena

The dark figure paced the room in anger, and anger he hasn't let subside for some 30 mortal years and showing no sign of stopping. His thoughts were of her again, the mortal that saved him, hurt him and used him. The mortal who's life was fleeting , yet captured his immortal heart and awoken it, only to destroy it. He walked to the window and stared out into the night sky. "The sky is the color of your hair my princess" he whispered to the night air "as well as the color of your heart" his hand came down in a slam to meet the stone window sill, the stone crumbled from the impact. He looked down at the rubble and with out a thought he waved his hand to repair the damage "See what you have done my princess" he paused holding back a tear "you have yet again brought out the worst in me." Turning and walking away from the window he went to his throne and collapsed in it. He closed his eyes and let his mind wander back to a time before she left to die…….

"I don't have much time before she realizes I am gone" Xena said as she approached Ares in the forest glen.

"Why do you care what she thinks" he began as he reached for her "you never cared before what others thought." He pulled her to him and bent down to claim her lips.

Before his lips claimed her she whispered "Things change" and then she greedily claimed him.

They were unaware how they fell to the forest floor, how their clothing seemed to vanish as they gave into the desires building for so long in their souls and hearts. As they laid there tangled in each other it was Ares that spoke first "So I take it I get that one in a billion chance" a smile alighting his face as he looked down upon his beautiful princess. For the first time he let his emotions show in his eyes, his mask was dropped and he wanted her to know how he felt.

"I believe it was million" Xena replied with a laugh "but whose counting." She met his stare and was terrified by what she saw. He wasn't holding anything back, his love was real and would not go away easily. She thought maybe this was a mistake, I can't give myself to him again. She turned from him, got up and started dressing. "I have to get back or Gabrielle will suspect something" she said over her shoulder as she pulled on her shift.

Ares stared at her and then looked to the ground "Who cares what she thinks, why should we hide" he got up. With a flick of his wrist he was again dressed in his usual leather "Xena turn around and look at me" his voice ebbed in anger. He was getting sick of sneaking around the damn bard, would it always be this way? He could have Xena for a few moments here and there but when the sun came up she was the Bard's.

Xena finished donning her armor before she turned to face him. She knew what was coming and she knew she had to make a choice, but it was so hard to decide. She raised her vision to meet his gaze and found the mask once again in place "Yes Ares" was her only answer.

Ares tried to soften his expression, but to no avail. Damn it he would plead this out just one last time and if she did not agree he would force himself to stay away from her. She thought he was poison, he was starting to think it was the other way around "I need an answer, we have been doing this far too long" waving his arms around to take in the forest around them "I want you and I am sick of running around hiding my love for you from everyone."

Xena had heard this before, but she also knew that one of these times he wasn't going to say those words any longer and he would be gone. She had to make a choice "Ares I have one last mission I would like to take care of" she paused noting the change in him, he soften at her words "and when I return I will take my place at your side as your equal." She approached him slowly as she memorized his face, she felt this was a bad mission and wanted to take him with her in memory "We will let the world know that I gave you that chance in a million and you won my heart." She now stood before him looking up to him, blue meeting dark brown "I never knew you were capable of love, but now I can see it in your eyes." She drew him to a kiss. When the kiss broke she looked to his eyes again "Promise me you won't stop loving."

He looked at her with concern, she had fear in her eyes yet love. It was a strange combination "Xena I promise and I will await your return."

She backed away from him, turned and left without another word. Ares stood there for a few minutes watching her fading form before he vanished into the morning light………….

Ares came back to the present and opened his eyes. He hadn't thought about their actual conversation before, just the act that proceeded it "She was saying goodbye" he said as a lone tear fell. "She knew she wasn't coming back" he said his voice was getting louder "SHE KNEW SHE WAS NEVER COMING BACK AND PLAYED ME AGAIN" he screamed into the lonely night. Another war broke out caused by his emotions. "YOU FUCKING LEFT ME AGAIN YOU BITCH" He yelled as he stormed to the window again. Staring out into the night again, what love he had held was no gone. He had closed his heart again to that damned emotion and would make her pay for her betrayal "YOU HEAR THAT XENA, YOU WILL PAY DEAD OR NOT YOU CAN'T HIDE FOREVER" his voice lowered "and I am forever".

The mortal plane below was covered in blood and death. He couldn't contain his rage anymore and it was playing out below. All was lost with the loss of his heart.

A lone bard lay on her death bed in this desolent land. She had seen so much in the last thirty years. So much loss of life caused by one woman's selfish act. Gabrielle turned her face to look out the window. The sun would be up soon, another day of war. She thought of the letter laying next to her on the table as she felt her life fading. She knew it was time, time to end this for everyone. She called the one who lamed her, the one who had caused all of this "Ares" her voice so feeble with age "Ares come and hear my tale of Xena." She closed her eyes and waited. She prayed to anything that would hear her to bring him.

Ares still stood at the sill looking out into the now morning anew. His thoughts were still upon the only thing he thought of, his lost princess. He felt the rush of power as the wars played out below "and she thought I would fade into night, I think not for I am more powerful than even Zeus at his prime" a wicked smile crossed his face at this thought. His enjoyment of the death was disrupted by a plea from the bard. He shook his head as she called again claiming a tale of Xena "Well I have nothing else to do" he said as he vanished.

He reappeared before the bard. A smile lit his face "Well, well, well the ravishes of mortality have played their hand quite well for you." He enjoyed seeing this little bitch suffering with the pains of age.

Gabrielle stirred from sleep to the God of War "I see you haven't changed one bit" she replied.

"The advantages of Immortality Blonde" he answered as he walked around the room taking it in. He stopped when he noticed the scroll next to her bed "Is this the tale you spoke of blonde?" he questioned as he picked it up and began to read the words she wrote.

"Yes" was her answer as she watched him take in the words. He finished and stood there unmoving, she ventured to speak first "You see Ares even I can not forgive her, but I did not take her betrayal out on all humanity nor do I forget the good times we had together" she paused to take in the God before her, she could feel the rage subsiding a little "Ares I am angry at her too, she lied to me too, but I still love her and that is what helps you go on." She shook her head as she looked at him "You will never listen, why did I bother?"

Ares suddenly turned to her "Yes little Bard why did you bother? Where you hoping I would take pity on you now that you are old and feeble and not kill you immediately. Why should I hold on to anything from her, she lied to me because of you." He was angrier than she had ever seen. He raised his hand, forming a ball of fire "Perhaps I will finish what I started so long ago." He met her eyes and did not see fear. His hand dropped as he sat on the edge of the bed instead.

Gabrielle looked upon the God before her and saw a broken man for the first time "Talk to me Ares, tell me what you feel."

Ares looked to her again "I am lost without her, I feel betrayed."

"Tell me why you feel betrayed, I would have thought you would of praised her for the way she left his world, you know she took on a whole army before she died" she said.

He smiled at that, for having the knowledge that she did not about Xena. He didn't want to share it but he had to make her understand, understand him perhaps "You didn't know everything" he said as he brought his hand to her forehead "See the truth though the lies she weaved."

Gabrielle felt a rush of power upon his touch and saw the memories he had. The lies Xena told him, using her as the excuse. He released his touch and she looked up to him again "I am sorry Ares I never knew it went that far."

Ares stood. His back to her "then maybe you understand my suffering and why all others suffer through me."

He was about to leave, when he was once again stopped by her voice "Please Ares try to remember the good times" she paused gathering herself "I don't think she lied about her feelings for you, she was misguided in her search for redemption." He never said a word as he stood there "She will come back you know and you have to search her out" he simply vanished at the last. Gabrielle again fell back to her bed, exhausted from the encounter. Her thoughts were on the man who was in so much pain and that she prayed she reached him in time.

Ares returned to his domain and stood before the window again. He ran the words of the bard over again in his head. He raised his hand to open a portal. Memories of Xena filled the portal. He leaned against the wall and let himself forget her betrayal for a moment and took in the good times they had shared together and against one another.

Below on the mortal plane wars slowed and eventually stopped for a time. His rage was pacified for now. A lone soul smiled as she left the plane to the spirit world, perhaps she had succeeded after all and only time would tell. She knew that he would search Xena's soul again when she was reborn and their adventures would start anew……