A/N: Who else beside me thought I'd never write this? :D (Honestly, I didn't think I'd be able to write anything again - if you've by chance read You will always be my... you might have a general idea why... ^^;; )

Erwin Danchou walked into the dining hall one morning during breakfast, asking for attention. At his tired, defeated voice everyone went deadly silent, dreading what was to come and preparing for the worst.

After a few seconds of silence, Erwin took a deep breath, closed his eyes in mental agony and began his speech. "I really didn't want it to come down to this. I really, really don't want to ask this question but there is no way around it." Every single person in the hall held their breath. Here it comes. "Does anyone have any clue where Eren is?"

There was a loud, collective groan and a few not-again's. Several people started banging their heads against the nearest hard surface, even Mikasa looked exasperated, quietly declaring she didn't even care anymore (the way she nervously grabbed her scarf gave her away, though) and Erwin gave them all a sad smile, feeling their pain. This wasn't even funny anymore.

In the midst of all of this, there was but one hand waving enthusiastically.

And to think Erwin almost gave up all hope...

"Hanji, please tell me you know something."

"Well, not exactly but," her grin widened as she whispered loudly in mock-secrecy, with a hint of excitement, "Levi took a day off and he isn't here either!"

At her words all heads started twisting in all directions to confirm Hanji's observation.

She was right; Heichou wasn't there.

The crazy scientist just might be onto something.

SOME HOURS LATER

The afternoon training had about 40 minutes until its scheduled finish and everyone participating was practically dying of exhaustion when the faint sound of hooves hitting the ground could be heard. All activity stopped as eyes turned expectantly in the direction of the road, waiting.

A minute later the beautiful horse belonging to no other than Levi Heichou casually strolled in, Levi himself barely glancing at the sweaty, dirty, tired people. On the other hand, Eren, who was sitting behind Levi, holding on to him maybe a little too closely, waved at his friends enthusiastically with a huge grin. The pink bubble surrounding them was honestly pretty disgusting from the outside.

The two lovers either didn't care or notice that everybody present followed them with their eyes, blank expressions on their faces from the moment they came into view until they disappeared into the stables. They continued to stare even after that, watching the entrance intently until they emerged again (after a suspiciously long time), Eren dragging Levi after him by the hand while still sporting his happy grin. (No one could believe Levi Heichou was actually smiling as well, though much more subtly then his over-expressive boyfriend.)

The trance that everyone got into only broke long after the duo disappeared inside the castle obviously not planning to come back out, when Erwin Danchou cleared his throat awkwardly and announced, "You're all dismissed until dinner." Then he quickly left in the direction of the castle.

The order was met with a round of happy yet exhausted cheers. Who doesn't jump at the chance to stop suffering, physically and mentally even a single minute earlier?

As everyone was gathering their things, there were several looks exchanged - some of them worried, some curious, some excited.

Hanji was the first one to act on the silent, collective decision, grinning in her signature maniacal way, turning around and jogging after Erwin.

Mikasa followed shortly after with a slightly worried frown on her face. Armin was next, grabbing a weakly protesting Jean along the way ("But I don't give a damn about them!" "Stop lying, Jean.")

Krista looked questioningly at Ymir who shrugged, throwing her arm around the smaller girl's shoulders possessively, before they slowly made their way after their friends. Sasha announced she was hungry and is going to use the distraction to steal food, and instructed Connie to give a detailed report. The boy smirked and saluted before quickly limping away. (Training does that to you sometimes.)

Erwin knocked on the door to Levi's room, being painfully aware of all the pairs of eyes and ears discretely watching and listening from around the corner but doing his best to ignore them – especially Hanji and her dramatic commentary. ("Nobody's opening the door. Anything could be happening in there. They could be sleeping, writing poetry, eating, cleaning, cleaning each other, dirtying each other, doing satanic rituals... Anything. Will the big, bad guy try opening the door to solve the big mystery and possibly get dismembered for it or will he be wise and wait for them to finish?")

It took several tries but eventually the door opened, revealing a dripping wet Levi, obviously just out of the shower.

"Ooh, I'm kinda jealous of Eren right now. Levi is so hot when he's wet."

Erwin resisted the urge to roll of his eyes at Hanji's dreamy sigh. Levi's eyes flickered in the direction of the spying group, a half amused, half self-satisfied smirk on his lips.

He looked back at his superior, schooling his expression back to indifference. "What do you want Erwin?"

"What do you think Levi?"

Levi rolled his eyes, crossing his arms and leaning on the door frame. "If this is about me taking Eren out..."

Erwin sighed in irritation. "You mean you dragging Eren off without telling anyone, much less getting permission."

"Whatever."

A chorus of gasps resounded in the distance.

"Levi, this is a serious matter. You can't just up and elope with him. What if something happened? What if someone attacked you two? What if the military police found out? This relationship in itself is breaking practically all military rules there are, plus some. I should punish you both for all of this, but mostly you..."

Erwin went on and on for some time in his rant, looking more and more frustrated while Levi looked more and more bored. The audience was holding their breaths the whole time.

Erwin paused to take a deep breath before continuing and Levi grabbed the opportunity, interrupting him, "So what are you going to do about it, daddy? Ground me? You can't very well 'punish' me properly or the military police would definitely know. And we don't want that, do we?"

Erwin gave him a cold glare. "Indeed. I won't be taking any disciplinary actions but I can definitely make you regret this."

Levi gave an unimpressed snort.

"I mean it, Levi."

"Right."

At that moment the bathroom door inside the room opened and Eren came out, fully dressed, rubbing his wet hair with a towel. His brows furrowed in confusion at the scene before him. "Uhm, is something wrong?"

Erwin opened his mouth to chew Eren out as well, but Levi was faster. "No, it's nothing. Erwin was just leaving."

The door was shut resolutely in Erwin's face and dead silence enveloped the corridor. The kids plus Hanji all shrunk away, trying to blend in with their surroundings when a very, very dark aura started emitting from the Danchou.

"Hanji."

Hanji squeaked in response to the sudden authority in his voice, "Yes sir!"

"You're in charge. All of you here will go through the castle top to bottom. You will search every damn closet, every damn corner in this building and confiscate every and all cleaning tools – soaps, rags, mops, everything – and gather them into the room connected to my office. Now."

Erwin was highly satisfied and Mike (who was standing guard at the door to Levi's treasure and witnessing the whole event) was highly amused, as Levi came groveling while crying tears of blood before the night even ended.

Levi swore to never ever just up and kidnap Eren, no matter how much Hanji keeps him away from him doing stupid experiments.

He still couldn't bring himself to regret it though.

A/N: Eren is so clueless at the end because Levi told him they got permission from Erwin. He knew Eren wouldn't agree otherwise and Erwin woudn't let them go so lying was the only option. ^^

Okay, so I really really really want to write the date but I have no idea what they should do ㅠ.ㅠ (That's why this is marked as unfinished... If I don't come up with anything, there won't be a second chapter to this. I'm open to any suggestions :) )