A way out

Author's Note: Set right after 'the limey'. Dedicated to uofmcowgirl and ASK. Thank you, for everything and then some.

"Wow! Four dates in three days…you like her!" she couldn't hide the shock in her tone.

"Yeah. Why?" he had that annoying smug look on his face again.

The one she hadn't seen in years, and didn't miss one bit. In fact, she would love nothing more than to wipe it off his damn ruggedly handsome jaw right this second. Preferably with her lips…Get a grip Kate. Castle, Date, Blonde bimbo. Focus! She chastised herself mentally.

"Its just…she doesn't seem like your type"

"Eh…she's fun and uncomplicated. I think that's what my life needs right now." He finished, smoothly slicing her heart in two, before walking away with the metaphorical bloody knife clenched in his hand.

Wow Kate, are you sure YOU aren't the writer in this relationship? The self deprecation followed the pain that gripped her soul in a tight fist.

HANG ON A DAMN MINUTE! She told herself, I am Kate Freaking Beckett. I am the youngest detective NYPD has ever seen. I deal with murderers all day. I deserve better than this!.

Steeling her jaw and clenching her fist, she marched towards the stairwell and downwards, two stairs at a time, thanks to her mile long legs. By the time she managed to reach the ground floor, she was a tiny bit out of breath, but a sly smile did grace her lips upon noticing that she beat the elevator to the punch.

A familiar ping resounded in the hallway and she once again stood face to face with the writer whom she wanted to kill and kiss at the same time. Okay maybe kiss for a while before killing…or maybe the killing can wait a while longer so she can take him home and rip that shirt off his…Kate, what did we JUST say about focusing? Right.

While Castle's usual behavior would have been to just wait for her with a curious expression on his face while she zoned out for half a minute, he didn't seem to have the patience for it tonight. In the few seconds that it had taken her to recover from her impromptu fantasy, he had already side stepped her and was walking away towards his ferrari full of flight attendant.

Snapping into action, she reached him quickly and snagged him by the arm, dragging him to their left into an empty corridor, blissfully away from the bimbo's eye-line. She would deal with her and that irritatingly tempting car in a minute.

"What the hell is your problem?" she barked at Castle the moment the doors of the corridor shut behind them.

"What is my problem? What is your problem?" He snapped back, looking confused and annoyed at the same time.

"My problem is that one minute my partner is all fine and dandy and standing strong with me while I deal with a hard case, and the next he is off to Vegas picking up flight attendants and giving them the keys to his ferrari."

"I told you I met her on the flight to Vegas, not in Vegas" he had the audacity to correct her.

"Do I look like I give a flying rat's ass about where you picked her up, Castle? I am more concerned about the why part of that statement. Why are you acting like this all of a sudden? What happened?" She fired question after question at him, her tone however going steadily smaller with each.

"Nothing happened. I just found her fun and uncomplicated, that's all. I am a single man, I can do as I plea…"

"BULLSHIT! That's bullshit and you know it, Castle." She cut him off, voice rising again. Did he really think he could get away with an excuse that flimsy?

"Well, you should know. After all you are the queen of the bullshitting club, aren't you?" he said taking a step closer to her.

"What are you talking about?"

"About you lying to me Beckett." He spat out, almost making her last name sound like a curse.

"Me…"

"Yes. You, Katherine Beckett, lying to me about not remembering anything from the day of your shooting. There, I said it. Happy now, Beckett? You should be, since your plan of stringing me along like a little puppy that caught your fancy worked really well." Once he started, he couldn't hold himself back anymore. The overwhelming urge to hurt her as much as he was hurting, kept him going.

"Tell me I am wrong, Kate. Tell me you didn't hear me pour my heart out to you while you lay on the ground that day, bleeding out in my arms. Tell me you don't remember the words I said, the look in my eyes as the one thing I cared for more than my life itself, was slipping away from me, one droplet of blood at a time. TELL ME YOU DON'T BLOODY REMEMBER, KATE!" He yelled, tears streaming down his face, hands now clenching her shoulders and backing her up against the wall.

"YES I REMEMBER. Everything. And not just your side of it. I remember every second of what you just described. But you know what else I remember? I remember standing at that podium looking at you one minute, and then feeling a burning hot pain slice its way through my heart as I lay on the ground the next. I remember a cold feeling that started at the tips of my fingers and fought its way towards the center with each gush of blood that left my body as you held me in your arms. I remember the look on your face when you decided you lost me. And then I remember you saying you love me. Just before I couldn't keep my eyes open any longer." She continued after taking a deep breath, ignoring the shocked look on his face.

"You gave up, Castle. You thought you lost me. Your confession, was one that was prompted by the fear of my death, and not your own will. You only said it because you thought you were never going to see me again. So of course I lied. I was protecting my heart and giving you an easy way out, Castle." she cried with him, as she felt any and all hope of a future with him leave her heart. It was over. They were over.

"I didn't…I don't want it" she heard him whisper.

"Don't want what, Castle?" she whispered back, too tired to hold on any longer.

"A way out. I didn't want it then, I don't want it now. You were right Kate, the confession, it was prompted by the fear of losing you. Of never seeing you again. But the only effect the fear had on my confession was make me blurt it out a couple of hours before the original time line. I was going to tell you, Kate. After Roy's funeral. I had already decided that it was time I came clean with you about how much you mean to me and how important it is that you stayed safe. One way or another, you would have found out about my feelings that day. I just wish it was the latter rather than the former." He ended his sad but honest defense with a stroke of her cheek, brushing away the tears that kept flowing.

"You…you meant it?" she asked, not even daring to breathe.

"Every word"

"It wasn't a pity confession?" she asked, the idea now sounding lame and childish in her own head.

"Absolutely not" he reassured, patiently.

"You really loved me?" her voice was barely a whisper now, her heart picking up a tribal rhythm.

"No" Her heart stopped.

"No?" she mouthed the words, robbed of her voice.

"Not loved. Love. Present tense, Kate. I really love you." He breathed life back into her heart as it lurched back up.

"I really love you too" she mouthed again, still too shocked to find her voice. It didn't matter. He heard her anyway. They both heard each other loud and clear this time, and neither could pretend otherwise, even if they wanted to.

"I am going to kiss you now, Kate. So if this is some kind of pity love thing you threw at me to keep me from leaving, say so now. Because if I kiss you I wont be abl…"

She swallowed the rest of his words as her lips met his. Eager, tender, passionate and full of pure, unadulterated love. She was right all those years ago. He talked too much. It was time to shut him up, and then some, and she knew just how.

Author's Note: Guess who's back?