BONUS: From "Making Today A Perfect Day"

"All You've Been Through"

It was an innocent comment a few days after the thaw that started it all. It wasn't even addressed to Elsa, but it affected her nonetheless. It was a conversation between two of the staff members of the palace, spoken when they didn't know Elsa was there and could hear them.

"I'm so glad things have changed around here!" one of the ladies gushed. "Everything's so much brighter."

"I agree. And I haven't seen our Anna so happy since she was a little girl."

"It's a wonderful thing after all she's been through."

The last words echoed unceasingly through Elsa's mind as she quickly walked away. All she's been through… because of me.

It was too late to stop the self-deprecating path Elsa had embarked upon. She came to the hallway she still shared with Anna and stopped short, staring sadly at her sister's closed door. How much time did she spend all alone? Her eyes flicked farther down the hallway to where her own door stood. How much of her life did she waste by that door trying to reach out to me? Elsa suddenly realized that she was crying and she muffled a sob with her hand.

"I'm sorry," she whispered brokenly to no one. Then she looked back to Anna's door. I should tell her. I should tell her how sorry I am that I did this to her. I owe her that apology a thousand times over. She took shaking steps until she was standing right in front of the door, still stifling her tears with one hand.

But what right do I have to knock on her door? I made her spend years knocking on mine. I don't deserve her. I don't deserve her compassion and her forgiveness, Elsa thought to herself, despite knowing that Anna would probably be willing to let her in and would want to forgive her instantly. She shouldn't. She should hate me after all I put her through. I have treated her so badly! Elsa thought about knocking anyway, but every time she raised her hand her courage fled.

Eventually Elsa collapsed, overcome by a deep sense of worthlessness and regret. She slumped to the floor, her body shaking. She did her best to conceal her cries, but the utter loneliness she felt in the dark hallway on top of the guilt and self-hatred was overwhelming. She curled up into a miserable ball, pressing her side against Anna's door. Ice scattered around her on the hall carpet. The thought that her current situation was what Anna had experienced for years upon years crushed her soul. I deserve this. I deserve to sit out here like she did. This is my punishment. Elsa was so lost in her mental masochism that she didn't hear footsteps approaching the door from the inside.

Anna hadn't quite gone to sleep for the night when she was alerted by footsteps and soft sobs outside her door. Immediately recognizing the visitor as Elsa, she sat up and waited impatiently for her to knock so she could welcome her sister inside and figure out what was wrong and comfort her. But the knock never came. Instead, she heard the thump of a body coming to rest against her door and the continuation of the soft, heart-wrenching whimpers.

"Elsa," she murmured worriedly, realizing how bad Elsa's condition must be. Anna fearfully threw off her covers and rushed to the door. Glad that the door swung inward, Anna opened it and bent down just in time to catch Elsa. She had been curled into a ball against the door, quickly crying herself to sleep, and had nearly toppled over when it opened. Taking in the sight of her sister's disheveled figure, Anna's heart fell. Elsa's eyes were literally frozen shut with tears. Her body was absolutely freezing, and she was shaking like a leaf. Anna wasn't sure if her sister's trembling was due to emotional upset or the temperature. She watched in dismay as Elsa clearly tried to open her eyes and experienced another brief moment of panic before descending back into helplessness.

"Oh Elsa, Elsa," Anna cried, folding her sister's body into her arms. She curled around the frigid form as best as she could, trying desperately to impart some warmth. Realizing that she was getting nowhere, Anna pulled Elsa to her feet and hauled her quickly across the room. The mostly-unconscious woman was in no state to resist when Anna pushed her into bed and got in after her. She wrapped them both tightly in the still-warm blankets and pressed Elsa close to her body.

"What's wrong, Elsa? Why were you out there like this? Why didn't you knock?" she asked, heartbroken by Elsa's condition.

"I'm sorry," Elsa whispered brokenly, "for all you've been through. I'm so sorry." And tearful apologies were all Anna could get out of her sister for the rest of the night, even though words of unconditional forgiveness and gentle kisses on closed eyelids melted the restricting ice. Normal tears then flowed down Elsa's cheeks, but after a long while she began to relax. She was obviously exhausted, so Anna didn't press for more answers. She wasn't sure she needed them, anyway. Guilt was radiating off of the stricken queen. So in lieu of talking it out, Anna simply held her sister close to help her feel safe and loved and forgiven and let her drift off to sleep.