A week later, McGee arrived at work to find a familiar package already on his desk. He immediately sent a text message to his co-workers and soon found his desk surrounded by eager faces. Even the short-sighted, technophobic Gibbs managed to pick up the message and casually turn up.

Hey McTim

Just found this great postcard of the view from The Shard – it's the highest viewing platform for London. 1000 feet high, just shows that I was easing you in gently with those other high rise photos. I think you'd like the UK despite their obsession with building tall things. Although I guess we're not much better. Do you think we inherited it from the Brits? Ducky'll have an opinion.

Thinking of gravity … and plummeting helplessly from a great height, I thought you might like this Newton Gravity Defying puzzle although I don't think you can use it to prevent yourself from tumbling to the earth.

Hope you haven't been sneaking any of my snacks. The Senior Field Agent desk is a no-go area even for acting SFAs. You have been warned, McOpportunist! Although, I think I left a cheese sandwich in my desk – you can throw that away. I don't want you to be blaming the Boss for pongy food smell in the squad room!

See you

T

McGee averted his eyes from yet another dizzying view and began to think how to work out the puzzle.

"Anthony is still in London, I see," said Ducky.

"May be not," said McGee as he handed a card and package to the Ducky.

Dear Ducky

Paid a visit to Stonehenge the other day. Seriously odd and awe inspiring. What do you think? Look forward to hearing what you think it's all about.

Best wishes

Tony

Ducky's audience tried to hide their astonishment at Tony inviting Ducky to give an opinion on something.

"Wow," said Jimmy, "it must be really something."

"And why is that, Mr Palmer?" asked Ducky with a touch of hauteur.

"Well, um. Well, it's unusual. You know. For someone, for Tony to … Um, what did he send you?"

Ducky took pity on his assistant, "It is a paperweight depicting the prehistoric monument. Hmm, it has a good weight. I must make sure I'm not holding it if I follow Jethro in administering head slaps to my co-workers."

Jimmy giggled nervously, and McGee decided to divert attention by delivering Jimmy's mail. It seemed that Tony had visited the Tower of London and had bought Jimmy an apron which made the wearer look as if he had a suit of armour on. Everyone laughed as he held it against him although McGee pointed out that a helmet might be useful if Ducky was thinking of delivering head slaps.

"What have I got?" asked Abby.

Dear Abby

Tower of London is seriously scary. All those people imprisoned here and then going off to their deaths. Still, the Crown Jewels cheer things up a bit – seriously blingy!

Love

Tony

"Oh," said Abby, "I hope he wasn't too sad there. Oh, look, it's a T-shirt." She held up a black T-shirt with a picture of a necklace round the neck. "It says it's Anne Boleyn's necklace. So cool. Jimmy and I will be able to go out together wearing them."

Jimmy began to worry at how to explain to Breena that Abby wanted to take him out. He was still recovering from his bachelor party plans. Tim's efforts to divert Abby weren't entirely helpful,

"Anne Boleyn? Wasn't she one of the ones who got their heads cut off?"

"Or was she burned alive?" asked Jimmy.

"No, definitely beheaded," said McGee as he accessed Google.

Abby's hand instinctively went to her throat and Ducky tried to reassure her,

"I'm sure Anthony had no sinister thought, Abby. He simply saw a garment which he thought you would like and I must say it looks very becoming."

"Thank you, Ducky," said Abby, "And Gibbs. What have you got?"

Hey Boss

Just been to the New Forest in original recipe Hampshire. Not sure how they get away with it. As far as I can see it's not New and it's not a Forest. I thought I'd pick up something wooden for you but they frown on that sort of thing. Saw some donkeys on the road – real ones, not people being stupid. In some ways this is a really crazy country.

Anyway, got you this. Hope it's OK.

Tony

The card showed a picture of a donkey sticking his head through a car window. The gift was old fashioned shaving soap in a wooden bowl. Gibbs nodded approvingly.

"When did this get here?" asked Gibbs, "it's a bit early for a mail call."

"Don't know," said McGee, "it was here when I got in."

"Hand delivered," came a familiar voice from the stairs.

The others span round and gasped when they saw Tony coming down to the squad room with the Director.

"Tony!" squealed Abby happily and she ran to catch up on months' worth of hugs and Tonyness, "Bert and Captain Tony are getting on great," she informed him, "and the head lice and fleas are cool."

The Director looked alarmed, he had missed the toy insects arriving.

"Oh, it's OK, Director," said Abby, "I've got them trained."

"I've got my socks on," said Jimmy, "look!" and he lifted his pant legs so that the others could see his port and starboard socks.

"Wrong feet," said Tony, "you've got them on the wrong feet, Jimmy."

"Explains a lot," said Gibbs.

"Have you lost weight, Anthony?" asked Ducky when the tumult of welcome had died down, "you look thinner."

"It's the time difference," said Abby earnestly, "messes up the Circadian rhythm. Who knows what else it does?"

"Indeed?" said Ducky sceptically, "well, my boy, pop down for a check sometime, why don't you? After all we need to have a discussion about Stonehenge. Come along, Mr Palmer, we have work to do."

"Of course, Doctor," said Jimmy, "good to see you back, Tony," and he walked away trying not to be confused that he didn't seem to know his right from his left.

Abby also left reluctantly after several more hugs and urging Tony to come visit and see the Tony wall and to re-acquaint himself with the head lice and fleas. McGee was sitting at his desk absorbed in trying to work out his puzzle so Tony went to sit at his desk. He looked across at Gibbs who just nodded.

"Talk is dangerous, eh, Boss?" he said.

EPILOGUE

Two months later, Gibbs got home and found a letter on the door mat. When he tore open the thick cream envelope he saw that it contained an invitation to a function at the British Embassy in two days' time. Gibbs was about to throw it in the trash when he remembered that Tony had the afternoon off on that day. He looked a bit closer at the card and saw a handwritten note attached,

Dear Agent Gibbs

I hope you will be able to attend

Yours

Caroline Smithson.

Tony didn't mention the reason for his leave request and Gibbs didn't say anything about his own invitation but he made sure that he dressed with more than usual care for the occasion.

When Gibbs was ushered into the lobby of the Embassy he found that Tony was already there chatting with other guests, some of whom were familiar to Gibbs.

"Agent Gibbs, how nice to see you," said Lady Caroline.

Sir Charles nodded briefly. Tony stammered, "What are you doing here, Boss? I didn't know you were coming."

"Got a special invitation," said Gibbs.

"It's all right Tony," said Caroline, "Don't worry." Seeing that Tony still looked flustered, she continued, "Agent Gibbs, I don't believe you have met my other nephew? This is Crispian Ware-Paddington."

"Agent Gibbs, I've heard a lot about you," said Crispian with a smile. "I'm pleased to meet you."

Tony made a strangled sort of noise which suggested he was finding it difficult to cope with his Boss meeting all his family but before anything more could be said, they were asked to move into another room.

The room was large and grand but they were the only people present. A few chairs had been placed in rows and drinks had been laid out on a table to one side. Gibbs was puzzled about what was happening but then saw the British Ambassador entering the room.

"This is an unusual event," he announced, "but one which I am most honoured to be part of. Her Majesty has asked that I act on her behalf to acknowledge a significant act of bravery in the service of the United Kingdom. The award I am about to make is not lightly bestowed and even more rarely to someone who is not a citizen of the United Kingdom but, today, I am tasked with making this award to two brave young men, Crispian Ware-Paddington and Anthony DiNozzo. Mr Ware-Paddington chose to receive his award in the United States so that he could receive it with his cousin.

Mr Paddington, Mr DiNozzo, would you both please step forward to receive the Queen's Gallantry Medal which is awarded for exemplary acts of bravery."

After the ceremony, Sir Charles approached Gibbs,

"Here is the citation for the award," he said, handing him a piece of paper, "I suggest you read it. It is the most information you will get about what Tony did in the UK."

Gibbs nodded and took the sheet of paper to a quiet corner where he scanned it. It seemed that Tony and Crispian had uncovered a dangerous mole who was stealing secrets from both the US and British governments. They had let the spy follow them round as they appeared to be making a light-hearted tour of the country. The most dangerous point had occurred when, as part of allowing the mole to believe his cover was intact, they had to allow themselves to be lured into a potentially life threatening situation on Dartmoor. They had barely escaped with their lives but, as a result, the traitor believed he was safe. Both governments would now be able to feed him false information and at some point in the future, would be able to use him to trap more people.

Tony drew near as Gibbs finished reading.

"I couldn't tell you, Boss," he said, "I guess the powers that be decided you could find out a bit more after all."

"What happened on Dartmoor?" asked Gibbs.

"We got blown up. Worse than we thought. I had a concussion and lost my hearing for a while. Couldn't come back to the States until it was sorted."

"So you and Crispian are friends?" asked Gibbs.

"Yeah. You know, practical jokes are a Paddington trait not a DiNozzo one."

"So?"

"That IOU that Crispian found?"

Gibbs nodded.

"One of his better pranks. He really enjoyed the Hall of Mirrors. And it meant we were able to get a photo of our 'friend' as well. He let his guard down enough to get caught in one of the reflections."

"And what about …?" began Gibbs.

"That magnet," said Tony, "the one about Talk is Dangerous?"

"Yeah?"

"Still true," said Tony.

"Darling," said Caroline drawing near, "we have to go now. Are you sure you want me to take this?" She pointed to the box containing the medal.

"Yes, I'm sure," said Tony, "the award is secret. And it's not like I could ever wear it. You keep it safe."

"Of course, I will. And it might mean you want to come and visit to see it sometime?"

NCISNCIS

Gibbs and Tony drove back to the Navy Yard together.

"Queen's Award for Gallantry, eh?" said Gibbs, "you could have put it in with my medals, you know."

"Safer this way," said Tony.

As they waited for the elevator, Abby ran up to join them, "Wait for me," she cried.

Tony held the door open for her and then extended his arm to her.

"Oh, Tony," she said, "you're so gallant."

Gibbs smiled and muttered under his breath, "and he's got a medal to prove it."

AN: reached the end at last! Thank you to everyone who has been following the story. As always, the NCIS characters aren't mine but I don't think I've caused them too much damage! It was great fun to bring Tony to the UK.