Disclaimer: I don't own Knight Rider or any of the characters. But you knew that.
This goofy little story and its title were inspired by the comments of Sarah Enany. Thanks for the feedback. ;-)
Thank you to Mike Pajaro for the episode length info (I rounded a little).
Thank you to Tomy and Asp for laughing.
Boring Car Chases
Michael drummed his fingers against the steering yoke. "Where are we?" he asked, glancing around at the high desert terrain.
"In the middle of nowhere, in between cases, heading home," Kitt answered, his voice modulator jumping. "We're approximately 40 miles outside of Las Vegas."
Michael glanced down at his watch. Damn. It was later than he thought. They didn't have much time and he wasn't about to get blamed for blowing the schedule. He punched the Pursuit button on the dash and stomped down on the accelerator.
"Michael, what are you doing?"
"Just doing the job, Kitt."
"But Michael, this is silly. Perhaps, just for once, we can dispense with this ridiculous formality."
"Kitt, there's no point in arguing. It's in our contract. You know we can't go more than 46 minutes and 20 seconds without a car chase."
"But Michael, there's nothing out here to chase."
"It doesn't matter, buddy. We've gotta do it." Michael felt his adrenaline surge as the engine roared, hurling them down the straight, flat stretch of road. This was more like it. Now if only he had a target - some prey to make the hunt worthwhile.
"Kitt what's on your long range scans?"
"There's a campground with three RVs parked in it, a run-down shack that seems uninhabited, and a man on a bike - apparently one of the campers."
"Motorcycle?" Michael asked, hopefully.
"No," Kitt answered, frustration slipping into his normally even voice. "A bicycle. A man pedaling a three-speed bicycle."
"Is he armed?"
"Don't be ridiculous! Unless you consider a Swiss army knife a weapon."
It wasn't as good as a rocket launcher, but it would have to do. Michael set his jaw and stared out through the windshield, squinting to catch a glimpse of the bike. "Show me the target," he said, nodding toward Kitt's video monitor.
"Michael . . ."
"Just do it, Kitt. I don't want to let this one get away."
Kitt sighed audibly as a red dot appeared at the top of his screen, blinking in place. A black silhouette representing Kitt sped toward the little dot.
"We're gaining on him," Michael said, tightening his grip on the yoke.
"Of course we are! It's a bike!!!"
Michael flipped open the glove compartment and slid on his driving gloves. He wanted to be prepared in case they needed to do some precision maneuvering.
"Your 'target' should be in visual range momentarily," Kitt said with distain.
Michael's piercing blue eyes scoured the road ahead as a small shadow appeared on the horizon. As Michael watched, the shadow quickly grew.
"Turbo Boost or Ski Mode, pal?"
"What are you talking about, Michael? The road is clear, he hasn't done anything wrong, and you'll probably give him a heart attack. There's no need for this!"
"It's an action show, Kitt! There must be at least one Turbo Boost, Ski Mode, or Super Pursuit Mode per 46 minutes and 20 seconds of content. If you don't pick one, I will and last I checked, you hated the way you looked in SPM."
"That was before the writers got a hold of me. 'I love my new pop out fins.' Apparently, I've always wanted to look like a pimped-out dragster."
The bike was looming in Michael's view. It was now or never. He couldn't wait for Kitt to decide. He hit the Turbo Boost button and grimaced against the acceleration that forced him back into his seat. The car sailed up over the bike, clearing the man's head with mere inches to spare.
But Michael wasn't done yet.
As the car neared the ground, he reached out and stabbed the Ski Mode button. He felt the whoosh of air as the car changed course mid-flight. They came rushing down and landed hard on two wheels. The Trans Am wavered a moment and Michael was afraid they weren't going to make it. But the car managed to stay balanced and continued to drive down the road on two wheels.
"Yeeeaaah!!! Alright!!" Michael yelled, slapping the dash as the passenger side tires finally fell to the asphalt with a crunch. "And just in the nick of time. Forty-six minutes and 19 seconds since our last turbo boost! Good work, pal!"
"Michael, you were supposed to save the Turbo Skiing for sweeps week," Kitt chastised, taking control of the car and returning it to normal speed.
-------
knightshade
12-17-02
This goofy little story and its title were inspired by the comments of Sarah Enany. Thanks for the feedback. ;-)
Thank you to Mike Pajaro for the episode length info (I rounded a little).
Thank you to Tomy and Asp for laughing.
Boring Car Chases
Michael drummed his fingers against the steering yoke. "Where are we?" he asked, glancing around at the high desert terrain.
"In the middle of nowhere, in between cases, heading home," Kitt answered, his voice modulator jumping. "We're approximately 40 miles outside of Las Vegas."
Michael glanced down at his watch. Damn. It was later than he thought. They didn't have much time and he wasn't about to get blamed for blowing the schedule. He punched the Pursuit button on the dash and stomped down on the accelerator.
"Michael, what are you doing?"
"Just doing the job, Kitt."
"But Michael, this is silly. Perhaps, just for once, we can dispense with this ridiculous formality."
"Kitt, there's no point in arguing. It's in our contract. You know we can't go more than 46 minutes and 20 seconds without a car chase."
"But Michael, there's nothing out here to chase."
"It doesn't matter, buddy. We've gotta do it." Michael felt his adrenaline surge as the engine roared, hurling them down the straight, flat stretch of road. This was more like it. Now if only he had a target - some prey to make the hunt worthwhile.
"Kitt what's on your long range scans?"
"There's a campground with three RVs parked in it, a run-down shack that seems uninhabited, and a man on a bike - apparently one of the campers."
"Motorcycle?" Michael asked, hopefully.
"No," Kitt answered, frustration slipping into his normally even voice. "A bicycle. A man pedaling a three-speed bicycle."
"Is he armed?"
"Don't be ridiculous! Unless you consider a Swiss army knife a weapon."
It wasn't as good as a rocket launcher, but it would have to do. Michael set his jaw and stared out through the windshield, squinting to catch a glimpse of the bike. "Show me the target," he said, nodding toward Kitt's video monitor.
"Michael . . ."
"Just do it, Kitt. I don't want to let this one get away."
Kitt sighed audibly as a red dot appeared at the top of his screen, blinking in place. A black silhouette representing Kitt sped toward the little dot.
"We're gaining on him," Michael said, tightening his grip on the yoke.
"Of course we are! It's a bike!!!"
Michael flipped open the glove compartment and slid on his driving gloves. He wanted to be prepared in case they needed to do some precision maneuvering.
"Your 'target' should be in visual range momentarily," Kitt said with distain.
Michael's piercing blue eyes scoured the road ahead as a small shadow appeared on the horizon. As Michael watched, the shadow quickly grew.
"Turbo Boost or Ski Mode, pal?"
"What are you talking about, Michael? The road is clear, he hasn't done anything wrong, and you'll probably give him a heart attack. There's no need for this!"
"It's an action show, Kitt! There must be at least one Turbo Boost, Ski Mode, or Super Pursuit Mode per 46 minutes and 20 seconds of content. If you don't pick one, I will and last I checked, you hated the way you looked in SPM."
"That was before the writers got a hold of me. 'I love my new pop out fins.' Apparently, I've always wanted to look like a pimped-out dragster."
The bike was looming in Michael's view. It was now or never. He couldn't wait for Kitt to decide. He hit the Turbo Boost button and grimaced against the acceleration that forced him back into his seat. The car sailed up over the bike, clearing the man's head with mere inches to spare.
But Michael wasn't done yet.
As the car neared the ground, he reached out and stabbed the Ski Mode button. He felt the whoosh of air as the car changed course mid-flight. They came rushing down and landed hard on two wheels. The Trans Am wavered a moment and Michael was afraid they weren't going to make it. But the car managed to stay balanced and continued to drive down the road on two wheels.
"Yeeeaaah!!! Alright!!" Michael yelled, slapping the dash as the passenger side tires finally fell to the asphalt with a crunch. "And just in the nick of time. Forty-six minutes and 19 seconds since our last turbo boost! Good work, pal!"
"Michael, you were supposed to save the Turbo Skiing for sweeps week," Kitt chastised, taking control of the car and returning it to normal speed.
-------
knightshade
12-17-02