As Real as it Gets

A/N This is an M-rated version of Chapter 8 of my T-rated AU story, Flying Solo. Peeta and Katniss are growing back together on a Mexican resort after nearly 10 years apart, a series of misunderstandings and a failed engagement. The full version of this fic can be found on my profile. I hope you check it out.

The sheer curtains in the patio door of were billowing in the morning breeze when Katniss awoke in Peeta's arms. She watched them fill like gossamer balloons before fluttering up to release their contents and whispering back across the floor toward the balcony just outside the bedroom of Peeta's luxurious suite. They seemed to be floating in and out of the room in time with the waves rolling onto the beach and the flow of Peeta's soft, even breathing across her neck. The simple rhythm added to the unfamiliar sense of peace that had stolen over her the minute that Peeta had slipped in beside her the night before.

They had rolled to their sides in unison as they slept. He was spooned against her back, his arm holding her tightly as though he were subconsciously afraid that she'd slip away. But she wasn't going anywhere.

Katniss didn't know when, but somewhere along the way her heart had been tied to Peeta Mellark's and they'd never been able to untangle the strings. She wasn't sure she'd ever really wanted to. Peeta, on the other hand, had been engaged. Katniss didn't blame him for having a relationship. She didn't. She had dated, even had boyfriends who lasted a few weeks or months, but there had been no declarations of love or talk of commitment. Katniss hadn't wanted that or needed it. She claimed to be too busy with Prim to deal with romance. The truth was that she refused to settle for less than what she'd felt with Peeta, even while she pretended to forget him.

Is that what he'd done? It was the only way she could reconcile words his words last night with the idea that he'd been engaged. She'd never forget them for as long as she lived. Completely. Irreversibly. Hopelessly. Permanently. In love with her. And it was possible that she felt the same.

Behind her, Peeta took a deep breath and stretched before nuzzling his nose into her neck inside the collar of the shirt she was wearing. He placed a kiss where it connected with her shoulder and then made his way up the slender column toward her ear. "Good morning," he whispered sleepily before moving his lips to her cheek where he kissed her softly again, his hand skimming up her body, coming to rest just below her breast.

Katniss reached behind her and sank her fingers into his hair, pressing his cheek to her own and ignoring the way the stubble on his jaw scratched her face. "Mmm. Hi." She snuggled deeper into his bare chest. She laced her fingers through his and they both relaxed into the mattress while the breeze blew over them. They lay quietly, as though hypnotized by the sound of the waves while the gulls cried out to each other.

"This is nice."

It was better than nice, Katniss thought. She couldn't remember another moment in her life when she'd felt so content. "It is," she replied.

She could feel him smiling as he kissed her neck again. Succumbing to the urge to look at him, she rolled over. His hair was tousled. His eyes were soft from sleep and full of dreams. Two days in the sun had given his skin a golden sheen. She reached out to stroke his cheek again and the smile on his lips spoke of promises they had yet to make. The pad of her thumb passed lightly across his lips and he drew it into his mouth, nipping it lightly before releasing it with a playful grin. His hand slipped under the shirt, skimming up so that it bunched at her waist before sliding back down over to her panties to her thigh. She watched him, wordlessly, as he repeated the motion and then swung her leg over his hip. Heat pooled at her centre when she felt him hard against her. Peeta clearly wasn't as drowsy as he seemed. He used his weight to gently push her back against the bed so that he hovered above her, one leg between her thighs.

"What are your plans for the day?" He flicked open a button on the shirt and lowered his head to explore the soft plain of exposed skin with his lips.

"Uh…" How was she supposed to think while he did that? "Not much. Find a sunbed on the beach and read for a while maybe?"

He flicked open another button, exposing the valley of her breasts and his mouth trailed downward. "You could do that here, if you like. I have a private one out on the patio." His hands found her breasts, stroking the peaks through the fabric of the shirt with his thumb.

She whimpered and sank her hands back into his hair, urging him upward so that she could kiss him. Their lips met and clung together in a languorous embrace. As they pulled apart, she bit his lower lip lightly and then her lips travelled along his jaw to his ear. "I can't," she whispered. "I need to go back to my room and get cleaned up."

"Do that here. Wait until you try my shower. You'll never want to leave it." The shirt was fully unbuttoned now and his lips replaced his hands.

She gasped as his tongue swirled around one dusky peak. Why did she want to go back to her room again? "My toothbrush," she managed.

He lifted his head. "I'm pretty sure I have a spare." He replaced his lips with his fingers and then turned his attention to the other breast.

She licked her lips and attempted to catch her breath. Damn. He was good at this, but she couldn't hang around here all day. She needed clean clothes. "My book and…" His teeth grazed her nipple and she whimpered in pleasure as her train of thought was derailed again. She wove her fingers into his hair. What had she been trying to tell him? Right. "Stuff. I've got to, I mean I need my, oh!" His hand rode up the inside of her thigh brushing lightly over her underwear.

He lifted his head and gazed down upon her determinedly. He laid his finger across her lips. "We'll go get it. Later." He rose above her, repositioning himself between her legs, and laid a trail of open-mouthed kisses down her sternum, over her belly to the edge of her panties. His hands slid up the inside of her thighs again stroking her again. Her neck arched back against the pillows while her hips rose from the bed against the gentle pressure of his fingers.

She shuddered with want and closed her eyes. "But…"

"Katniss." His finger slipped inside her panties. She gasped again. "I'll stop if you want me to." He ran his fingers over her swollen flesh. "Look at me." She opened her eyes to meet his. They were darker than usual, like a storm-filled sea. "Is that what you want? To stop?" His thumb slipped between her folds and brushed against her bundle of nerves.

A small sound sprang from her throat when he made contact. "No! Don't stop."

His thumb moved in a small circle and her hips rose up to meet his hand again. "You sure?" When she nodded, Peeta hooked her panties in his fingers and whipped them off, letting them fall to the floor. "OK then. Turn off that busy brain of yours and let me touch you." His thumb returned to her folds to stroke her. Her legs fell open. He lowered his head and looked at her hungrily. "Let me taste you."

Katniss felt like she was on fire from within, a slow burning that began where his tongue met her centre and spread through her limbs to the tips of her fingers and toes. He dipped it inside her, groaning softly and then slid upward, his tongue rolling between her folds, over her clit before sliding down again. Katniss' breath grew shallow as her entire being focused on Peeta's ministrations and the liquid heat that flowed through her. One of his strong hands clamped over her thigh to hold her in place as he used the other to slide two fingers inside her, pumping slowly when she tightened around them. His mouth moved to the insides of her thighs as she squirmed trying to bare down against his hand or bring his mouth back down upon her.

"Uh-uh," he chastised. "I've waited a long time to do this." He moved then, to cover her body with his own while she cradled him between her legs. He captured her hand when she tried to slip it inside his pyjama pants. He pinned it above her head and brought his lips to hers. "This," he said firmly before kissing her again and then leaning down to trace his tongue along the shell of her ear. "This is a favourite fantasy of mine," he whispered in her ear and ground his hard length against her. Katniss wrapped her legs around his and pulled him in closer wanting as much of him as he would give her and far more than he was sharing at the moment. He grazed his teeth lightly against her neck and pressed himself against her again. She whimpered. "I dream of you. All the time." His breath was hot against her neck and his voice had taken on a husky tone. "Hot. Needy. Hungry." A jolt of anticipation ran down her spine as he returned to her mouth only to stop a hair's breath away. "So Don't." He pressed his lips against hers. "Rush." He kissed her again. "Me." This time, Peeta's tongue slipped across the seam of her mouth begging entry and she admitted him, her tangy taste still on his tongue as it slid across her own. He let go of her wrist so that she could pull him in closer to her as their lips and tongues entwined.

As their lips moved together, their hips found a rhythm, but it wasn't enough to satisfy either of them.

Katniss tore her mouth away from his. "Peeta, please," she begged. He made a noise somewhere between a growl and a purr of satisfaction. He kissed her lips, her chin. His mouth made a stop between her breasts where he rolled the sensitive tips between his fingers. His tongue trailed down her belly, around her navel. And this time, when he lowered his mouth between her legs he focused his attention on the part of her that ached the most.

Katniss cried out, arching up off the bed. He brought his fingers back inside her, pumping in and out vigorously. Her hands were in his hair again holding him in place.

"Don't stop. I'm almost there." She was lost to everything but how he was making her feel – powerful, sexy, free. She raced down a tunnel of need, straining toward the white light that was flashing behind her eyelids.

He crooked his fingers in a come-hither gesture and soon her body exploded into a thousand points of delicious energy and she called out his name like an answered prayer.

Her body was still pulsing when she opened her eyes to see satisfaction glittering in his own. She sat up and pulled him against her hungrily. "Now," she said. "I need you inside me now."

He gave her a crooked grin and started to lay her back against the bed when she remembered. "Wait. Please tell me you have something."

His eyes widened when he realized what they'd been about to do. "Uh. I think so. Maybe. Just a sec." He raced into the adjoining bathroom and she could hear him frantically looking for a condom. She sat up, biting her knuckle in an effort not to giggle. She lost the battle when he returned, foil packet in hand.

"That's not nice," he said, shaking his head as he crawled up on the bed. "You shouldn't laugh at a desperate man."

She took the packet from him, wrapping her arms around his waist and hooking the waistband of his pyjamas under her thumbs. "You're right. I'm sorry. I guess I'll have to make it up to you." In one smooth motion, Katniss undressed him, revelling in Peeta's hiss when her hand wrapped around his erection. She stroked him firmly, circling her thumb over the head before making a return journey to the base. Peeta's eyes closed and his chest heaved jerkily at the contact. His expression, slack with pleasure at her first touch, was becoming increasingly focused and his jaw was tense. He called out her name to the ceiling in pleasure and surprise when her lips wrapped around him. She hummed back in response and then rolled her tongue over his shaft. She began to bob her head up and down, taking more of him into her mouth each time, answering his groans of pleasure with moans of her own. She picked up speed, sucking harder, and reached out to fondle him when he stopped her.

Peeta took the packet from her, sheathed himself quickly and then rubbed his knuckles against her cheek. He seemed shy suddenly, uncertain. "Shall we?"

She looked up into those blue eyes, the ones that belonged to the man she'd never been able to forget, and thought about how, only just days ago, she believed he had used her for a one-night stand. Now everything was different. They wouldn't repeat history. They would find a way to make it work. She hoped.

Their hands found each other without further discussion. The lazy exploration that had kindled frantic passion was forgotten. This was not a prom night flirtation with romance or a college hook-up.

This was real.

Peeta joined them together and they moved as one being, the pace of their bodies in time with the beat of their hearts. Katniss wrapped herself around him, her entire world shrinking until there was nothing left but her and Peeta, locked in the most intimate of all embraces. His hands danced over her body, kindling heat and pleasure. His voice whispered in her ear, telling her she was beautiful, perfect. Unable to find words, she worshipped him with her body. When they reached their peak, his eyes were filled a love that burned into her soul, returning a piece of her that she hadn't known was missing. She realized in that moment that the years they'd been apart didn't matter. This would have happened anyway.

After, she lay curled against his chest, his lips pressed to her forehead while he stroked her back.

"I love you." There was a tremble in his whispered words, as though he feared they might not be returned. "I've always loved you."

He needn't have worried. "I love you too," she said simply and clearly before reaching up to place her lips against his own. "Always."

A whoosh of air expelled from his body as he crushed her to him, peppering her face with kisses as he said those three all-important words over and over. She laughed and attempted to wriggle away, starting a wrestling match that only ended when, perched above him and contemplating a series of rather sexy options, Katniss' stomach growled.

Peeta gave her a crooked grin. "Breakfast time?" She scowled and he laughed. "What?" She shook her head. Breakfast meant leaving, which she no longer wanted to do in spite of her earlier protests about returning to her room. "C'mon, Katniss," he cajoled, tickling her sides, "what put that look on your face?"

"I just want to stay here," she muttered, which made him laugh harder, before sitting up and flipping her over to her back where they bounced against the mattress.

"Then stay," he said, kissing her quickly. "Stay here. With me, for the rest of the week." She started to protest. "No, really. I got a free breakfast in bed with this crazy honeymoon package. I'll call right now and order it. After breakfast you and I will conserve water by sharing the world's biggest shower and then we'll go get your stuff. We've only got a couple of days left here. I want to spend every second of it with you."

Katniss bit her lip. Then she nodded. Peeta's eyes danced. "You'll allow it?"

"Yes, I'll allow it."

They had a breakfast feast at a little iron bistro set on the balcony. Katniss's omelette oozed with spicy habanero cheese when she cut into it and dipped it into the salsa it was served with. The bread basket was filled with toast, croissant and little oval shaped rolls called bolillos that Peeta, ever the baker, told her were served at breakfast time in Mexican homes. The roll was still warm when she slathered it with butter before reaching for some fresh fruit.

She chewed the crispy roll thoughtfully, watching as a crowd began to gather on the beach below them.

"So," she said, turning her attention back to him. Peeta was pouring himself a cup of tea. "Sounds like you paid for the deluxe honeymoon package."

He rolled his eyes. "A deluxe, non-refundable honeymoon package. Not my idea. I worked double shifts over the winter to pay for this." He shook his head.

"Peeta! Really?" Katniss was shocked that any woman would be ok with that kind of sacrifice from someone she loved for the sake a vacation, honeymoon or not.

"Yeah." He sipped his tea, put it down. "There was no way I was going to let it go to waste after everything fell apart. I just figured I'd stay drunk for the whole trip, skip the couple-y things. Then there you were. And now, here we are. So, hey, not complaining." He reached for a bolillo, pulled it apart and reached for the butter.

"So what else is in this package of yours?"

His brow wrinkled as he buttered his roll and tried to remember. "A day-long visit to the spa for two." Katniss shuddered. "What?"

"Strangers touching me. Gross."

His eyes narrowed he pointed at her with his bread knife. "I knew you were lying to me the other morning." She blushed and stabbed a piece of melon with her fork. "Anyway, there are some other things too. Another excursion. A special dinner."

Katniss swallowed the melon. "Nice." She toyed with her omelette with her fork, unable to look at him. "So what happened?"

"Delly called it off."

Katniss dropped her fork, breakfast forgotten. Her eyes flew to Peeta who was sipping his tea and looking out over the water. "Oh. My God. You didn't just say you were engaged to Delly Cartright." His eyes snapped to hers and the look on his face was a mixture of insult and surprise.

"Yeah, I did."

"Perky, annoying, Delly Cartright? The girl responsible for the biggest PDA in the history of our graduating class?"

"Delly's a good person, Katniss."

"Peeta!" She plucked a grape from the bowl of fruit between them and threw it at him. He ducked just in time.

"Hey!"

"A good person? She dumped you at prom for another guy! Did you learn nothing from that?"

He pursed his lips. "First of all, Katniss, Delly has been my friend my entire life and she was a very good friend to me through a rough time after my dad died. Second, Delly didn't dump me at prom. It was embarrassing, but I got over it. She and I went as friends. I wanted to be there with you. She knew that. I thought you knew that."

She hadn't. Not really. She'd hoped she was the girl he'd talked about that night, but hadn't allowed herself to believe it. But this wasn't about them.

"Peeta, she expected you to work double shifts to pay for this trip and then called the wedding off? That is so selfish. I just don't understand how you can sit here and say she's a good person?" Katniss was outraged for him. Peeta was the good person, the one who forgave people when they didn't really deserve it. How could she have put him through that?

He grinned at her. "You're jealous."

Was she? Maybe. No. "That's not the point," she protested.

His smile got wider. "It is to me." He chuckled to himself. "Katniss Everdeen is jealous over me."

"I'm not. I'm mad and I don't understand how you could work double shifts all winter just to satisfy her wish for this big trip and not be angry too."

"It wasn't like that. C'mere." He took her hand and pulled her around the table to his lap. He stroked her outer thigh under the shirt and buried his face in her neck.

"I love you in my shirt," he muttered. "It's the sexiest damn thing I've ever seen." His lips nipped at her collarbone and he settled his chin on her shoulder. "The restaurant is doing really well, Katniss. I could have afforded the trip without the double shifts, but I didn't want to do it that way. I've been saving up for the seed money for another restaurant for the last couple of years. I've got a good nest egg built up, but not quite enough yet. Delly wanted me to use the money for a down payment on a house and our honeymoon. I was willing to give her those things, but I didn't want to give up on my restaurant dream to do it. I told her we'd be fine in the apartment for a while and Rye and I decided that I would take on the extra shifts we usually have over Christmas to save for this trip rather than hiring staff."

Katniss played with his hair while he spoke. It was better that he couldn't see her. It was killing her to listen to him talk about living with another woman.

"Anyway, after Christmas, I didn't stop working. I'm really close to my goal for the restaurant. She wasn't seeing me much. She was planning the wedding and she was mad that I wasn't more interested. I told her whatever she wanted was fine with me, but I'd take care of the cake and the food. Anyway, about six weeks ago she came into the office at the restaurant and told me she wanted me to cut back on my hours. I said no. She said that she didn't see me anymore and it was only going to get worse if there was another restaurant and she really didn't understand why Rye and I would want to compete with ourselves by opening another restaurant anyway. So I told her."

"Told her what?"

Peeta toyed with the buttons on her shirt. "That it wasn't Rye's restaurant too. That it was still going to be Mellark's, but it was going to be mine. And it was going to be in Pittsburgh."

Her hands stilled in his hair. Her heart began to race as she imagined her reaction to passing an awning with his name on it over the entrance to a romantic cafe. Delly probably had the same thought, she realized. "You never told her you plans? How did she react to that?"

He made a face. "Not well. She got very squeaky, accused me of keeping secrets."

She hated taking Delly's side. "You kind of did."

He shrugged. "Not on purpose. I hadn't really thought about where it was going to be or why I was saving so much. Not consciously anyway. It just, sort of, came together all at once in the heat of the moment. Anyway, she said that she had no interest in living in the city or in spending even more of her evenings waiting for me in the apartment while I worked myself to the bone, especially if I was planning on dragging myself between Panem and the city several times a week. Then she said that if I thought that she was going to waste her life sitting around in Panem while I spent my time in Pittsburgh waiting for you to walk into my restaurant..."

Katniss froze and inhaled quickly on a hiss. Peeta laced his fingers through hers and brought them to his lips.

"Is that true? Is this my fault?"

"No." He used their entwined fingers to wrap their arms around her. "None of what happened between Delly and me is your fault. None of it." He kissed her neck. "We should have talked more about what we wanted from our lives. She teaches school and wants a very traditional marriage with someone who keeps regular hours. Even without the new restaurant, I was never going to be able to give her that."

"Do you love her?" She hated herself for asking, for the needy tone in her voice.

"Not like this," he said, squeezing her tightly. "Not the way she deserves. It made sense for us to be married. We're a lot alike. We're good friends. Well, we were, anyway. I'm not sure what we are anymore. Our families wanted to see it happen. It just seemed to be what everyone expected of us."

Katniss bit her lip. "What about the restaurant, what she said about me?"

Peeta sighed and snuggled her neck some more. "She's always known about my feelings for you. Hell, you're the only person we went to school with who didn't." Katniss's eyes became moon-shaped as she processed that bit of information. She could feel him smiling against her shoulder and she swung around so that they faced each other. His hands found her waist while she wound her arms around his neck. "I won't tell you that I've never imagined you walking into my classy little bistro someday and being very impressed, but that isn't why I want a restaurant in Pittsburgh."

She remembered how carefree he'd been the night of Finnick's party. "You were happy there."

He nodded. "I didn't have my mother breathing down my neck. I wasn't the baker's son. I was just Peeta. I was an artist and a chef-in-training. Then Dad died and I had to go home. It feels, unfinished, you know?"

She pecked him on the lips. "I get it," she said, and she did. "But what would have happened if I walked in to married Peeta's restaurant?"

He buried his hands in her hair and brought their faces together. Her cheeks were cupped in the palms of his hands as their brows touched. He kissed her forehead while he spoke into her hair. "Maybe you will someday."