Beacon Library...

"Why do I feel like this situation's familiar..." Jaune groaned, sitting at a desk. Winter was in front of him, tapping a small blackboard with a small wooden pointer. She was crossing her arms, looking down seriously at the knight.

"Now, Mister Arc, you must take this seriously." Winter warned him sternly. "My sister is fairly quick to anger, and very hard to achieve the favour of. In order to make her smile as you desire, you must follow my instructions."
"Right..." Jaune nodded slowly, tilting his head. "You know, I just want to-"
Winter held up a finger. "I understand completely, Mister Arc. I know how much Weiss matters to you, so I will do my best to ensure you complete your task!"

'Huh. She really wants to help me out with this...' The knight mused, chuckling. 'Maybe I'm not completely screwed...'

The lady cleared her throat, adjusting her collar. "Alright. Your first lesson in making Weiss smile! You must first stray away from doing anything that might make her think you are truly a pervert!"
Jaune stared at her briefly before looking down, embarrassed. "Ehh...I think I failed that requirement. Several times over."

"Hm." Winter rubbed her chin pensively. "Alright. On to tip two. Be as polite as possible."
"So...always refer to her as Miss Schnee, like you always call me Mister Arc?" Jaune pointed out, sincerely interested. Winter giggled, shaking her head.

"No, that is just an unfortunate habit of mine that I have been long unable to shake off." The lady admitted. "My sister always tries to press me to take classes to get rid of that verbal tic.

Anyway, to continue my lesson. One must be careful to not run afoul of my sister's rather narrow sense of humour. She considers many things boorish and fit only for fools, and that might induce her rather unfortunately short temper to fly out of control."
"Boorish?" Jaune tilted his head slowly, looking concerned. "What might she consider...boorish?"

Winter frowned slightly, before thinking carefully. "...what others might consider mainstream humour."
'Ahhhhh crap.' The knight thought, disbelieving. 'I knew this was too good to be true...'

Jaune groaned, exasperated. "Dammit. How hard is it to please her?"
"She is easy to please, if you know what to and what not to do..." Winter pointed out helpfully. "But if you really want to make her happy, perhaps you should write her a letter!"

'Of course. A heartfelt gesture like a love letter will certainly speed this along.' The lady thought, smiling and rubbing her hands together eagerly. 'If Weiss sees how eloquent Mister Arc truly is, she will surely fall for him!'

Jaune nodded slowly, grinning. "Now that you mention it...a funny letter might just do the trick. Thanks, Winter, I'll get on it right away."

The lady clapped proudly. "Good to see that you're taking my sister very seriously! I would have it no other way. Good luck, Jaune. I believe you're perfect for her."
"...perfect for her?" The knight tilted his head, confused. Winter giggled lightly, hiding her mouth with her hand.

"Oh, I see how it is, Mister Arc. I see."

"I...don't get what you're saying." The knight scratched his head, before exhaling. "Alright. Well, I'd better be going now. See you later, wish me luck!"

The knight pulled himself up, strolling off towards the library doors. Winter smiled warmly, before sighing happily.

"Mister Arc truly is a gentleman, to wish to make my sister happy. I hope Weiss understands how lucky she is, to have someone so dedicated wishing to do that..." She sighed dreamily.

JNPR Dorm...

Jaune burst in, rubbing the back of his head and causing Nora to look up. She tilted her head at him curiously.

"Jaune, what happened? Where'd you run off too? I've been bored for two minutes!" The berserker whined, pouting. The knight raised an eyebrow.

"Two minutes? Nora, I've been gone for an hour, what did you do for the other fifty-eight?" Jaune inquired, somewhat horrified. Nora raised a finger, rubbing the back of her head and laughing nervously

"Heehehe...pleaaaaase don't tell Ren?"

Suddenly, Jaune heard several loud screams from the other side of the school, followed by someone wailing about 'the batter'. He cupped his hand onto his ear to pick up on what they were screaming.

"THE BATTER! IT'S MOVING! IT'S MOOOOVING!"

The knight turned back to Nora, his eyes narrowing. "What did you do..."

"I tried to make myself some pancakes for lunch!" The berserker protested. "Ren wouldn't make me any, so I decided to go for it myself!"

"..." Jaune raised a finger, before shaking his head. "Y'know, I don't want to ask what that ended up doing.

Just sit down and look for a book teaching you how to write a letter or something."

"A letter?" Nora inquired, curious. "What do you mean? How's that supposed to help you finish the mission?"

Jaune rubbed the back of his head casually. "Winter thought that if I make a funny letter for Weiss, it'd make her smile. Seeing as she is Weiss' sister, she's the closest we have to an authority on how Weiss thinks."

Nora touched her chin with a finger. "A funny letter? This isn't the time of the dinosaurs! Only people with crappy black-and-white TVs and torches write letters!"

"...riiight. " Jaune sighed, shaking his head at Nora. "Well, if Ren comes in, you can explain to him why there's a giant pancake batter monster going around the campus or whatever. In the meantime, d'you mind looking for an aid book for writing a letter?"

Nora pouted at him, but agreed, crawling over to the closet to dig through her collection of aid books. Meanwhile, the knight settled down at the dorm's computer, booting up a word processor.

"This should be pretty-"

"Choose."

'...you know, I really should've seen this coming.' Jaune sighed, listening carefully to the voice. 'Alright, what do you want?'

The voice continued, uncaring for his plight. "Your first choice is to have your computer locked on a screamer. Your second choice is to have birds fly into the dorm and poop on your head."

Jaune groaned. '...well, I can still write a letter if my computer malfunctions, but there's no way in hell Weiss is going to forgive me if I come to her smelling of bird poop.

Choice one, please.'

The choice boxes faded, as his computer suddenly flipped onto a screaming rotating shrunken head, letting out an unearthly scream. The knight jumped in shock, staring at the screen.

"W-what the-?!"

Nora was clearly alarmed, as she turned around to face what was going on. "Good Dust, what's going on?! What are you doing, Jaune?!"
"Absolute Choice screwed up my computer!" Jaune yelled over the screaming, making his way over to the socket to unplug the computer. The screaming cut out immediately as the screen turned off and the power lights faded to black instantly.

He sighed in relief, shortly before the CPU emitted a loud snapping sound and began smoking. He groaned, rubbing his temples in exasperation as the dorm filled with the smell of smoke.

"And now my computer's broken. Perfect." The knight exhaled, before peering over at the dresser. "Well, there's always the good old fashioned way of writing letters..."

He strolled over and rooted through the dresser, taking out a pen and paper, before laying it down across the desk and tapping it expectantly with his pen.

"Nora, how's the search going? Has anyone ever had to do something like this for a Curse Eliminating Mission?"

She was still rooting through her closet, tilting her head. "Let's see...Ten Tips to Make a Perfect Newsletter, Ten Tips to Make a Perfect Open Letter, Ten Tips to Make a Letter of Execution..."
"E-Execution?!" Jaune was taken aback. "W-what kind of mission did that one involve?!"

Nora looked solemnly at him, sighing. "It was a sad day...a sad day for slothkind...wait, I think I found it!"

Turning back to the closet, she yanked out a massive tome and hurled it at Jaune's side. The knight took the hit, groaning as he grabbed it, rubbing his side.

"Ow...you didn't have to throw it that hard, Nora..." The knight reproached her, before pulling the tome up to read it.

"Let's see now...the first tip says to...tell the receiver how much you love them? What the..." He blushed.

"I-I'm not writing a love letter here! Dammit! What's the second tip!" He flipped the page quickly as Nora tilted her head, reading it over his back.

"Tip two...always refer to them in the most flowery terms you can think of...like comparing them to Venu-Nora, are you sure this isn't about love letters?"

The berserker pulled the tome from his hands, showing him the cover, 'Ten Ways to Make The Perfect Letter'. "No, it's a good one."

He groaned, before waving off the tome. "Alright. Nora, you can put that away, I'll just make the letter on my own.

I swear, after this mission's over, I'm going to talk to that flippant god about how crappy his 'help books' are..."

"That's pretty mean." Nora pouted.

"It told me to outright lie to people!"
"You lie anyway! It's not like you can tell the truth about the whole Absolute Choice thing..."

Jaune shrugged. "True, but I'm not going to lie if I don't have to! And seriously, begging like a dog?! Dammit, I still have to have some dignity here!

Ggh...alright, just let me write this thing." Jaune turned back to the empty sheet of paper, looking at it carefully.

"What to write, what to write..."

An hour later, outside...

"It was pretty funny, you know." Yang giggled. "I kinda just flirted with him and he went all blushy and crashed into an aisle."

Blake rolled her eyes. "Yang, do you have to flirt with every person who does anything vaguely perverted to you?"
"No, just Jaune! It's funny! And anyway, as a Xiao Long, I'm encouraged- nay, obliged to spread the love!" The brawler cheered, grinning mischievously before pulling Blake into a tight hug.

"Like this~!"

The catgirl squealed, blushing embarrassedly. "Y-Yang! Let go! T-this is embarrassing!"

"Whaaaat?" The brawler smirked, teasing her. "I'm only hugging you, Blakey~

"Ggh...you're pressing my cheek into your chest..."

"I'm spreading the love~"

Suddenly, Blake saw Jaune round the corner, clutching a letter in his hands. The catgirl blanched in terror.

'I'm done for. My reputation is absolutely, positively done for...'

"Hey, Yang, Blake!" Jaune called over to them, before freezing. "Um..."

Yang waved at him, while still hugging Blake tightly. "Heeeey, Jauney-boy~"

"Um...I can come back another time, if this is too private..." The knight moved to leave, before Yang waved at him.

"No, no, it's fine! What did you want?"

Blake squeaked out, raising her hand. "Help...me..."

"Uh..." Jaune looked awkwardly at the situation, as the brawler relinquished her friend. "...I want you guys to read this."

He passed Yang the letter. The brawler pored over it, reading it carefully.

"...the heck is this?"
"It's a letter for Weiss."

Blake stared at the letter in Yang's hands, before mouthing over at Jaune, "Part of the mission?". The knight nodded in the affirmative, causing Blake to sigh in relief.

"...huh. Pretty funny." The brawler giggled, passing it back to Jaune. "Here. Hope Weiss likes it."
Jaune took it back gingerly, staring at her. "...you're not going to make a joke about it? Or me?"

Yang shook her head. "No, silly! I'm rooting for you!"

"...you are?" Jaune eyed her suspiciously. Yang nodded, clapping happily.

"Of course! I'm all for this! Go on and make her laugh!" The brawler clapped him on the shoulder. Jaune just looked at her strangely.

"...I don't want to know. I'll...uh..."

"Choose."

Jaune loudly groaned, as the boxes swirled around him once more.

"You may either ask Yang if you could get in on the hugging action, or ask to cuddle Blake tightly."

'GO AWAY. NO! NO! I AM NOT ASKING-gyaaaaahhhhh my head...' Jaune clutched his head tightly as a bolt of pain shot through it, imploring him to choose immediately.

'Gggh...I hate you. I hate you! I'm going for choice one.'

The boxes faded away, and Jaune sighed, breathing heavily.

"...Yang. Do you...errr...mind if I...uh..." He blushed slightly, staring at her. "...join...in the hugging?"

The brawler grinned. "...sure thing! You can have prime spot between me and Blake!"

The catgirl flailed, shaking her head. "NO! YANG!"

Jaune took that as his cue to escape, embarrassed by the comment.

"I-I'll see you guys later! Uh...bye!" With that, he escaped around the corner, leaving a grinning Yang and a very embarrassed Blake.

"...w-what was that for?!" The catgirl cried, feeling violated. Yang turned to her, grinning.

"I needed to do that to get him out of the way so we can plot!"
"...plot?"

"How we're going to break it to Weiss that Jaune's in luuuurve with her and is going all out to get her! I mean, she already knows about the flirting." Yang admitted, chuckling. "But...you know, this is true love!

We've got to get those two together! We're going to play matchmaker, Blakey! It's going to be fun!"

'Oooooh Dust.' Blake realised, blanching. '...it seems Absolute Choice isn't the only thing Jaune has to contend with...

...whatever mission he's dealing with, I can only hope it goes right. It seems like everything's already gone wrong for him.'

To be continued...

DISCLAIMER: RWBY does not belong to me, otherwise Ruby would have a motorcycle like Yang.

NouCome belongs to Takeru Kasukabe.

A/N: No bonus omake today, sorry. However, we're setting up for the end of Jaune's second mission. Obviously, he's going to succeed- otherwise the story might as well end next chapter- but now, the question is...how horribly will everything go right in the process?

So, I hope you enjoyed that, leave your ideas, comments, suggestions, criticisms, reviews and thoughts, and I hope you have a GREAT day! Until next time!