The good thing about finally looking noticeably pregnant was the guarantee that she'd get a seat on a crowded subway car. No one wanted to make a pregnant woman stand.

Kate had felt a flush of embarrassment the first time someone had risen from their seat the moment they spotted her, just last week, but had managed a tight smile as the middle-aged man ushered her into the newly vacant chair. Now, though, she'd grown used to the kind gesture, offering her genuine thanks to the men and women who rose from their seats to allow her to get off of her feet for the duration of the ride.

And people said New Yorkers weren't nice. So much for that.

Or maybe they were just following the directions of the strip of MTA ads that lined both sides of the subway cars, reminding people of how to be polite. Keep your bags in your lap to save space. It's a subway car, not a dining car. Poles are for your safety, not your latest routine. Offer your seat to elderly, disabled, and pregnant people.

While Kate hated having all eyes immediately drawn toward her the moment she stepped onto a subway car, it had become a game to try to choose which person in the vicinity would be the first to jump from his or her seat. As the doors slid open, she made eye contact with a man in a suit who looked to be about her age, seated on the opposite side of the car. Him. He'll be the first.

To her surprise, the man quickly averted his eyes downward, pretending to be too absorbed in something on his cell phone to have noticed her. The teenage boy beside him jumped up, though, offering Kate his seat with a polite smile. She thanked the kid as she settled down next to the businessman. If she wasn't mistaken, his cheeks were beginning to redden.

Serves you right, she thought, running her fingers across her stomach for added effect.

Kate couldn't deny that she'd purposely worn a shirt that hugged her belly tighter than usual today. She was proud of her new shape, now that she was finally past the awkward "expecting or just chubby" phase of her pregnancy. The swell of her abdomen was still small, but to Kate, it felt enormous, as if she'd eaten fifty cheeseburgers in one sitting. Her belly had a tightness to it now, a hardened roundness that it had never had before, and it poked out from underneath just about everything she wore. It could still be hidden under loose, flowy tops, but today certainly wasn't the day for that.

Today was her first day back at work after her suspension. Her first day to face her coworkers and friends after revealing her pregnancy in the worst possible way. Selecting a form-fitting magenta top, paired with a grey blazer and black maternity jeans, was her way of outwardly showing her confidence. Gone was the old Kate Beckett, who wanted nothing more than to hide her pregnancy from everyone. She'd had six weeks away to come to terms with her pregnancy, and she wasn't the least bit ashamed.

At least, that's what she was telling herself.

Kate opened up the pregnancy tracker app on her phone, reading the eighteen week blurb as the subway car rumbled down the tracks. It was always good for at least one eye roll, offering the latest update in her baby's size in comparison with a fruit or vegetable- a bell pepper this week, apparently. There was useful information in the update, though, assuring her that her increasing appetite was perfectly normal and that if she hadn't already felt the baby move, it would certainly happen soon.

And she hadn't, yet. The fluttering in her belly right now could be blamed on nerves, not the child inside of her moving around.

It was only when she climbed up the stairs out of the subway tunnel and onto the busy streets, spotting the precinct just down the road, that she felt the nervous flutterings begin to overtake her, working her up into almost a panic. Why the hell was she this nervous about going to work, when she'd been perfectly fine just a few minutes ago?

She managed a few steps down the sidewalk before she froze. Almost immediately, an angry commuter shouted obscenities at her for stopping the flow of pedestrian traffic, and she backed up against a store window with a quick apology. Once the majority of the crowd of people had passed by, Kate began to pace in front of the window, trying to work up the courage to continue down the sidewalk.

The people that she was about to face were her coworkers- her friends. Yes, they'd stare, but they'd get used to her belly soon enough, so the scrutiny wouldn't last that long. But that wasn't the part she was worried about. No, the thing that made her feel the most nervous was imagining the reception that her fellow detectives would give her upon her return. She had virtually lied to them for weeks by concealing her pregnancy for so long, after all, and she hadn't spoken to any of them since the day she'd practically shouted her news across the bullpen for everyone to hear. Knowing Esposito, he would be angry, and Ryan would probably throw in as many passive-aggressive comments toward her as he could manage. Of course, Espo would join in on that. And the questions that everyone would ask…

"Beckett?" The sound of her name startled Kate out of her panic, and she froze, whirling around to face the person who had called her. His deep baritone voice was unmistakable. Castle.

It had been four weeks since they'd returned back to the city from the Hamptons, but she hadn't seen him in seventeen days, not since she'd accepted his invitation for dinner at Remy's one night. It wasn't that she was ignoring him- she'd just needed the time to herself. Time to make hospital visits, to begin organizing and clearing out her spare bedroom for the baby's nursery, and to browse catalogs and make a list of all the things she'd need to purchase in the upcoming weeks.

And time, of course, to continue working on her mom's case; to review the case file again and again in an attempt to find something that she'd missed.

"Hey, Castle," she faltered, tucking a loose curl behind her ear in an awkward gesture.

"Hi." His eyes quickly traveled up and down her body, lingering on her stomach for a brief moment, and a grin lit up his face. "Wow, Beckett," he breathed, his eyes alit as they met hers. "You look great."

She felt her face flush with the words, and her hand flew to the top of her belly instead of rising to cover her flaming cheeks. "Thanks," she murmured, flustered by his sincere compliment. "It's a… bell pepper."

Damn it, that's not what she meant to say. But Castle was already grinning, his shoulders shaking with silent laughter.

"You're growing a bell pepper in there?" he asked, quirking an eyebrow. "All this time, I thought it was a baby."

She shook her head slowly and flicked her eyes downward, dropping her hand to her side. Seeing Castle for the first time in so long had her completely flummoxed, as if she were a middle school girl with her first real crush again. This man had a way of making her feel things that she hadn't felt in years; things that she honestly wasn't sure that she even wanted to feel.

Despite herself, though, she had to admit that she liked it.

Castle raised his wrist level with his eyes and shook the sleeve of his blazer back, glancing at his watch. "I was going to get to work a few minutes after you; let you have time to get settled before I showed up," he said, lowering his arm. "And I thought you started work at 8:00, but…"

"I do. Just running late," Kate interrupted. "It was a weird morning."

"Understandable. Well, I'll hang out here for a few minutes and give you a head start, if you want," he offered.

The gesture was sweet and well-intentioned, as were most things Castle said and did. He was offering to give her space, just like he had done for the past two weeks;, to let her have time to adjust to her new surroundings before he joined her. Normally, she did need that space, but not this time. Entering the precinct with him, rather than being alone, would not only take some of the attention off her, but also help give her the courage and confidence she needed to walk through the doors to face her coworkers.

Not that she'd tell him any of that, of course.

"You don't have to do that," she said simply, looking up at him. "Come on."

With those words, Kate summoned as much confidence as she could muster, turned on her heels, and began to stride down the sidewalk, leaving Castle to jog to catch up with her. He did, falling into pace beside her after a few seconds. The effort of walking so quickly put a strain on Kate's lower back that was hard to ignore, but she pushed through it. She'd finally given up on wearing heels for that very reason, foregoing the extra boost in height in exchange for reduced back pain.

It was strange to be so much shorter than her shadow, rather than equal in height with him. Having to look up at him, instead of being eye-to-eye, made her feel strangely vulnerable, a feeling that her protruding belly only increased.

The summer sun beat down on them, relentless, as they walked the short distance to the precinct, and Kate let out a deep sigh, wiping a bead of sweat from her temple. She had known she would regret wearing a blazer like this in July, especially being eighteen weeks pregnant, but had done it anyway. She'd probably end up shedding it once she'd settled at her desk in the precinct.

"You okay?" Castle asked from her side. Ever observant, that man.

"Yeah," she said with a sigh. "Just hot."

"It was the same way with Meredith when she was pregnant. My ex-wife," he clarified. "She was miserable just about all summer."

Kate offered him a grateful smile. Despite Martha's advice, she still hadn't been able to bring herself to tell Castle about her baby's father, but he'd been supportive anyway, almost commiserating with her, in a way. He never turned the side effects of her pregnancy into a joke, instead gently supporting her in whatever way he could. Having him at her side definitely wasn't a bad thing.

Even with him at her side, though, she was still nervous, and the silence between the two of them wasn't helping her feel any better. She asked Castle about the progress of his book, hoping he could drive the conversation.

"Oh, it's going well," he answered. "It's just about finished. I found a plot hole that I need to go back and fix, but once that's done, I'll have it ready to send off."

"A plot hole?"

"Yep," he said, placing his hand at the small of her back as they hurried through an intersection, the light on the crosswalk blinking red in warning. "I forgot to explain an important detail of Nikki's backstory, and…"

"Wait, Nikki?" Kate interrupted, looking up at him. "You named the character Nikki?"

"Nikki Heat," Castle confirmed with a gleeful nod. "Isn't that a good name? Think of all of the title possibilities I can get from that. Heat Rising, Heat Wave..."

"Castle," she sighed. "That's a stripper name. You've got to change it."

"Well, now, Nikki is based on you, Detective Beckett, and you've told me very few details of your life before becoming a detective…"

A pinch on his bicep was enough to silence him, and she found herself holding on longer than she intended to, thoroughly distracted by the strength and size of his muscle bulging underneath his blazer. She snapped to with his exaggerated yelp, releasing him as he shouted "Apples!"

"Apples?" she asked, lowering her head to conceal her reddening cheeks.

"My safe word," Castle said with a shrug, winging as he rubbed his hand over the place she'd pinched. "You got me pretty good, Beckett."

She must have pinched a lot harder than she meant to. Feeling sheepish, Kate raised her head to apologize, but froze when she saw that they'd arrived at the precinct. She grabbed Castle's hand and pulled him to the side, stopping at the window of the building next door.

"Castle." She kept her voice quiet, fully aware that her colleagues might be coming in and out of the building, possibly overhearing them. "Before we go in there, I… I mean, they don't know," she faltered. "No one knows that I went on vacation with you during my suspension, or that we've seen each other since. They don't know any of that."

"Beckett," he said, lowering his voice matching hers. "I know today's a big day for you. A hard day. And I don't want to make it any harder than it has to be. You don't have to worry about me being professional. I'll behave. Scout's honor."

He held up his right hand with the words, as if he were swearing an oath, and Kate pursed her lips together in an unsuccessful attempt to keep a grin from making its way onto her face. "Good. Because if you don't behave, I have a gun."

Castle raised his eyebrows, tilting his head to the side, and she sighed. She wouldn't get her weapon back until after she returned from maternity leave. She was so used to having it that the words had come without a second thought.

"Damn it. I don't have a gun."

"It's okay. You're on desk duty now, so you'll have my weapon of choice: a pen. And the pen is mightier than the sword," Castle said with a smile. "Or the gun, in this case."

"Cute," she murmured, rolling her eyes. "Alright, let's-"

A tiny fluttering in her belly unlike anything she'd ever felt before stopped Kate in her tracks, and she gasped, a hand flying to her stomach. Castle took a step closer to her, concern in his voice as he asked if she was okay, but she ignored him, focusing on the movement she'd just felt. Was that the baby?

A second fluttering confirmed it, and tears sprang to her eyes. "I just felt the baby move," she whispered, still standing frozen in place.

The look of panic on Castle's face melted into awe. "Oh, Beckett," he murmured. "That's wonderful."

The way he was staring at her, a proud smile on his face, flustered Kate even more than feeling her child's first movements had, and she dropped her hand to her side, straightening. "I… uh…" she fumbled, reaching up to wipe the tears from her eyes. "We should go in. I'm already late, and I have a meeting with Montgomery."

"Want me to make coffee?" he asked. "I can have it waiting for you on your desk when you're done talking to the captain."

"That would be great," Kate said with a grateful smile, taking two steps away from the window. "Oh, and Castle? Make it caffeinated. I want to give this kid a jolt of energy so that I can feel more movement."

She'd expected a fight with those words, but he only smiled, wordlessly following her into the precinct. Unlike just a few moments ago, her nerves were now completely stilled as they rode the elevator up to the precinct floor. She'd finally felt her baby move. Today was going to be a good day.

Kate stepped out of Montgomery's office and into the bullpen twenty minutes later, her bravado having gradually faded back into nervousness as she spoke with the captain. The room was mostly empty, with only a few cops milling about, but she kept her eyes trained on the ground as she walked toward her desk. She couldn't avoid talking to them forever, but maybe she could at least postpone the conversations with her colleagues until she'd had her coffee.

Castle was sitting in her desk chair, and he stood up as she approached, stepping behind it and pulling it out for her. The chivalrous gesture may have been over the top for two people who were trying to pretend that they had nothing more than a professional relationship, but Kate accepted it anyway, flashing him a grateful smile as she sat down.

He took his seat beside her desk, sliding a blue mug across to her. "It's half caf," he said. "I figured that would be a good enough compromise for us."

Kate murmured her thanks as she took a sip, turning her computer on. "Did anyone come talk to you?"

"Ryan and Esposito came by to say hi," he answered. "Lanie needed them in the morgue, so they couldn't stay, but they wanted to talk to you. Said they'll be back in an hour or less."

She nodded, setting her mug down on her desk. The boys were her closest friends at the precinct, and she'd seen the looks of hurt on their faces when she'd revealed her pregnancy. She could manage being confronted by everyone else, but she was particularly dreading the conversation with them.

"So, Detective, what exciting plans do you have for us today?" Castle asked, folding his hands together atop her desk.

Kate leaned back in her seat, sighing. "If you want exciting, you'll have to find another detective to shadow," she said. "Because you're not going to have very much fun between now and November."

"It's that bad, huh?"

"Compared to being out in the field, absolutely," she said. "Right now, Montgomery's giving me the rest of the morning to catch up on email. And mail, too." Kate gestured to a pile of envelopes at the corner of her desk.

"Sounds like fun," Castle said. "Then what?"

"Well, Montgomery wants to keep me in this room as much as possible. And I'm glad for that," she added. "So I'll be mostly doing background research on cases, running financials, cataloging evidence, phone calls, that sort of thing. When there aren't any active cases, I'll be filing warrants, organizing the evidence room, and whatever else they need me to do. And paperwork," she added, rolling her eyes. "Lots and lots of paperwork."

"Sounds like you've got your work cut out for you," Castle said, taking a sip of his coffee.

"Yeah, I guess you could say that," Kate shrugged. "I know it won't take long before I'm bored to death stuck behind this desk, though. At least I get this afternoon off."

"You do?"

"Yep. Doctor's appointment and ultrasound this afternoon," she answered. "And if the baby decides to cooperate, I'll find out if I'm having a boy or a girl."

"Oh, that's easy," Castle remarked. "It's definitely a girl."

Kate narrowed her eyes at him. "And how do you know that?"

"Trust me. I just know."

"Well, I happen to think it's a boy," a deep voice announced from behind her. "Hastings and Jenkins do, too, and most of the other officers."

Kate turned around to find L.T. standing on the other side of her desk, a bright smile on his face. "Welcome back, Detective Beckett. It's good to see you back here again."

"Thank you," she answered, breathing a sigh of relief. If the unis weren't harboring any hard feelings against her, this might not be such a rough transition, after all.

By the time L.T. walked away, Kate's computer had finished booting up. She opened her email, her eyes widening when she saw the bolded number at the top of her inbox.

"Eight hundred and twenty-seven emails," she murmured, raking her fingers through her hair. "I hope you brought something to do, Castle, because this is going to be a long morning."

"Angry Birds," he answered, pulling his phone out of his pocket with a grin. "Don't worry about me. I'm good for the rest of the day."

He settled back into his chair, and within seconds, he was absorbed in the game, cheering silently as he made his first shot. Of course Richard Castle was an Angry Birds fanatic. That shouldn't surprise her.

Forty-five minutes later, Kate had finally managed to delete all of the irrelevant emails in her inbox. Some were spam, but most were official city or NYPD notices about things that had taken place while she'd been on suspension. Only 202 emails remained now- still a huge amount to deal with, but not nearly as overwhelming as before.

She opened the first relevant email, an invitation to the retirement party for the captain of the 10th precinct. She'd met the man several times before, even worked with him once, and he was very kind, always showing a genuine interest in her life. She should definitely attend his party.

As she was inputting the details of the event into her work calendar, Kate heard the distant ding of the elevator arriving. As the doors slid open, two very familiar voices began to ring through the bullpen, growing steadily closer.

Before she had time to remember the conversation she'd rehearsed all night last night, Ryan and Esposito spotted her, halting their conversation as they took the last few steps to her desk. Kate raised her head to meet their eyes, her attempt at a smile disappearing from her face when she saw them standing in front of her, eyebrows raised and mouths tight.

"Hey, guys," she managed.

"Hey?" Esposito echoed, a tone of indignation in his voice. "You lie to us, then disappear for six weeks, and all you have to say is 'hey'?"

"Look, guys..."

"Why didn't you tell us, Beckett?" Ryan interrupted. "I thought we were friends."

"I didn't tell-"

"Castle knew, didn't he?" Esposito interrupted. "I can tell by the way he was treating you the last couple of weeks you were here. You told the writer that you were pregnant, but not us? Your friends?"

"Whoa, leave me out of this," Castle interjected. "It's not my fault that my spidey senses are so strong when it comes to detecting pregnancies."

"Guys, listen. I'm sorry." Wow, she'd finally managed to get a sentence out without the boys interrupting. Their faces didn't soften with her apology, but they were silent, waiting expectantly for her to continue.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you," Kate echoed. "Things are complicated. And that's not an excuse, but I was just having trouble dealing with everything. I couldn't tell people about the baby until I'd accepted it for myself. But I have now. And I promise, I won't keep you out of the loop anymore."

For just a moment, Ryan's face softened, but he quickly squared his jaw, the look of defiance on his face matching Esposito's once more. Kate was guessing that Ryan would be the first to break, and hopefully, his partner would follow soon after.

"I'm on desk duty now," Kate continued. "I may occasionally be called to a crime scene, but most of the time, I'll be here, doing… well, doing the stuff you guys used to do."

"Used to," Esposito repeated. "So you're saying we outrank you now?"

"Well… kind of," she replied. "Until I get back from maternity leave, you two are the acting lead detectives for the Twelfth."

"So we get to boss you around?" Esposito asked, a spark lighting up his eyes.

"Nice try," Kate said, allowing a tiny grin to spread across her cheeks. "My title hasn't changed. Just my job duties. But I know you guys will do a great job."

Esposito threw a glance at Castle, who had been sitting in his chair silently, taking in the conversation. "Will he be shadowing us now?"

"Sometimes," Kate answered, raising her eyebrows as she looked toward the writer. "He's a pest. I'll need to get rid of him from time to time."

"Not fair, Beckett," Castle said. His mock pout was so exaggerated and pathetic that she wanted to laugh, and Kate had to smother a grin.

Ryan turned back toward her, placing his hands on his hips. "So is it a boy or a girl?"

Well, that certainly wasn't what she was expecting to hear. Kate looked up at the detective, furrowing her brow. "What?"

"Come on, you're having a baby. You're- you're having a baby," he repeated, his voice softening as he dropped his arms to his sides. "And Uncle Kevin needs to know if he should buy a little baby tuxedo or a frilly dress for the kid's first Precinct Christmas party."

And just like that, Ryan had forgiven her. He offered her a soft smile, ignoring the glare Esposito was shooting at him, and Kate grinned in return. "I find out this afternoon," she answered. "And I promise, I'll tell you both. No more secrets."

"It's a boy," Ryan said. "I'm sure of it."

"Wrong!" Castle announced, looking up from his phone once more. "It's definitely a girl. Espo, what do you think?"

Esposito took a deep breath, as if he were about to say something, but before he got the chance, Montgomery poked his head out of his office and into the bullpen. "Detectives," he said. "A word, please."

Out of habit, Kate shot up to her feet, realizing with a start that she was no longer included with her fellow detectives for the time being. Despite the fact that she could feel the heat rising in her cheeks, Kate decided to pretend she had meant to stand up, pushing her desk chair in and smoothing her hands over her pants. She would disappear to the break room- no, the bathroom- for a minute or two, then come back and pretend that it had all been on purpose. She could feign that confidence; of course she knew that Montgomery hadn't been talking to her.

As she stepped away from her desk, Kate looked up to see that neither Ryan nor Esposito had moved toward the captain's office. They were standing frozen in place, staring at her- at her belly, to be exact. Ryan's cheeks reddened when she met his eyes, and he offered a hesitant smile, walking away quickly. Esposito lingered for a moment longer, though, his gaze softening as he took in the rounded curve of Kate's belly.

"I…" he started, looking up at Kate. He didn't finish, though, pressing his lips together as he turned on his heels.

Kate watched him stride away, and only when he'd closed the door to Montgomery's office firmly behind him did she allow herself to relax, a grin making its way onto her face. Ryan was on her side once more, and she was confident that Esposito would come around soon.

When Rick had arrived home at 12:30, he'd opened up the file for the book on his laptop, determined to fix his plot hole. After just under three hours of work, Nikki Heat was complete, and he emailed the file to Black Pawn. Gina would certainly be happy to see it; she'd been bugging him about his next novel for months now.

Rick sank back in his chair with a sigh of relief. He'd finally done it. He'd completed his first novel since killing off Derrick Storm. And he owed it all to Kate Beckett. His time shadowing her certainly hadn't gone as he'd expected it to, but as it turned out, he didn't need to see her at work to find inspiration. Detective Beckett wasn't the driving force behind his writing; Kate, the girl behind the badge, was his muse. Spending time with her, both in and out of the precinct, had filled him with a desire to write, stronger than he'd ever felt before.

His cell phone buzzed in his pocket, and Rick pulled it out, surprised to see Beckett's name on the caller ID. The only times she'd ever called him at home had been to inform him of a murder, and now that she was on desk duty, that certainly wasn't the case.

Rick swiped his thumb across the screen as he lifted the phone to his ear. "Beckett?"

"Hey, Castle," she said, her voice soft and gentle. "I, uh… am I catching you at a bad time?"

"No, not at all."

"Okay, good," she said, with a sigh of relief. "I just walked out of the doctor's office. I'm sitting in my car right now."

There was a beat of silence, and Rick pursed his lips together, confused. Had Beckett just called to chat? That seemed unlike her, but Rick had no idea why else she could be calling.

"Sorry," she finally said, giving an awkward laugh. "I just can't stop staring at this ultrasound picture. It's… it's incredible. It actually looks like a baby."

"That's good," Rick answered. "Because after our conversation this morning, I was afraid it would look like a bell pepper."

She giggled. "You're never going to let that one go, are you?"

"Not until you give me another fruit or vegetable comparison," he said. "So did Pepper show off for the camera?"

"Oh my God, yes," Beckett said, so excited that she didn't seem to notice his new nickname for the baby. "She wouldn't stop moving the whole time. She was doing all of these flips and stretches, and I could even feel some of it. I think I'm going to have a gymnast on my hands."

"Wait. She?" The pronoun hadn't gone unnoticed, and for a moment there was silence on the other end of the line.

"Yeah. She," Beckett finally answered, and he could hear the smile in her voice as she spoke. "You were right, Castle. I'm having a girl."

His earlier insistence about the baby's gender had been a joke. Truthfully, he had no reason to think that the baby was a girl. But the fact that his guess was correct made Rick's heart swell with pride.

"You're having a girl," he repeated, his voice soft. "I'm so happy for you, Kate."

Using her first name had been unintentional, but she seemed not to notice, thanking him instead. "Well, I have to go," she said. "I need to call my dad now."

It was only after they'd hung up that Rick realized the significance of those words. The first person she'd called upon finding out her baby's gender wasn't her father, or her best friend, but him. That certainly spoke volumes for how his friendship with Kate had progressed, and what she thought of him now. Wow.

Even though it wasn't necessary, Rick felt the need to reciprocate in some way; to tell her that he appreciated what she'd done for him without saying it directly. He stood, patting his back pocket to ensure that his wallet was inside, and sent a text to his town car driver, asking him to pick him up as soon as possible. Rick would show up at the precinct the next morning with the cutest little girl clothes he could find from Manhattan's finest baby boutique.

This was just the start of the gifts he'd buy for Kate and the baby over the next few months. And maybe, when Pepper was old enough, Kate would let him buy the little girl a pony.

Author's note: I'm picking this story back up for the summer 2016 ficathon. Here's to hoping for lots of updates over the next four months.

Also, I once again have a beta change... say hello and thank you to Cathey! You're the best, friend.