The experimental result conclusions
One last sad admission to owning nothing
Leonard stepped back and sat on the arm of the couch. "Oh…." He immediately looked down and started to fiddle with his hands.
Penny came over and took one of his hands and pulled him over to sit beside her on the couch. "Sweetie… It's not bad… I wanted to talk about the experiment… I want to stop it… can I please stop it?"
Leonard looked up. "Penny… I want you to know that I'm so sorry for making you do this…. I don't deserve you…"
Penny was surprised. "Leonard, what are you talking about… I'm the one that said I had feelings for Sheldon… not you… I needed to figure them out".
Leonard squeezed her hand… "That's just it… you didn't have to figure them out… I made you… you told me you loved me and I just pushed you into the experiment… just like I pushed you too fast by telling you I loved you when you weren't ready… or when I tried to push you to go to Pasadena City College… or when I pushed you for a date after the night we hit the moon with a laser… or when I proposed to you… twice... or when I rewrote your first essay… the real problem has always been ME… It may look like I don't trust you… like when you had your friend Justin over or when you worked with Cole. But I really jut have my own issues…. I say that I love you and yet I keep finding myself with other women… just to prove to myself that it is you that I need.
Penny was completely taken aback. "Are you saying you don't love ME?"
Leonard was afraid how the conversation was heading…. "GOD NO….no… it's just that seems I'm looking for some kind of acceptance…. We were broken up just a short time and I slept with Elizabeth Plimpton... The minute Priya came to town… I was all over her… and that nutcase Joy?... just cause she said she was easy… And that artist from the comic book store… Alice? She was a nerd… The answer always came out the same… I always just wanted you… You're the only true love I have ever had…"
Penny took a deep breath… "Leonard… Sweetie… You didn't push me when you said you loved me or proposed… I pushed you away… and into the arms of Dr. Slutbunny and Priya… I was insecure when you brought up the City College thing…. And Bernadette said she purposely picked Joy cause she was such a whacko… I know guys hit on me all the time… and I know that it feels good when they do… but I also know that it hurts you so much… I don't want to hurt you any more… I just want to be your wife… and get to hold you… and love you…"
Leonard looked into her eyes. "What about Sheldon?" Then he looked down, almost afraid of what the answer was going to be.
Penny picked up his chin so she could look into those big brown eyes. "Leonard… Sure I have feelings for him… but it's just like I said at the end of the last experiment. He's just like a brother… a gigantic pain in the ass… brother… one that you just want to take out behind the barn and beat the living CRAP out of sometimes… but you still love…"
Leonard sighed. "Still love?"
Penny kissed him gently. "Yes , Leonard… love… I love Sheldon… But I am IN LOVE with you… that's a big difference… I want to know that Sheldon is okay and safe and happy… BUT … I want to spend the rest of my life with YOU! I want to hold you and have you hold me… I want to sit on the couch with you and watch your nerdy TV shows or your Sci Fi movies and go out and watch some indie documentary movie on how decreasing everyone's carbon footprint is going to somehow save the world for our children…"
Leonard smiled shyly. "Our children?"
Penny leaned in and placed her forehead against his looking into his eyes. "Yes Leonard, Our children… I want to make love to you and grow old with you and feel that comfortable safety and satisfaction of just being with you and our family."
Leonard took Penny's hands and kissed her gently before leading her into the bedroom… the bedroom where they had first made love… where they had so many nights filled with love, both torrid physical love and just plain cuddling comfortable soothing togetherness… the same bedroom he proposed to her during sex…
Once in the room, Leonard sat Penny on the bed before sitting down next to her. "Penny… there is no reason to go any further with the experiment." He then turned and opened the nightstand drawer and took out the velvet bag. Penny just watched in anticipation. She couldn't breathe if she wanted to. Leonard opened the velvet bag and tipped out the ring. He looked at it and shined it on his pant leg. He held it out to Penny who had a hand to her mouth. Leonard cleared his throat. "Penny… will you marry me?"
Penny finally let out a halting breath. "Oh Leonard… of course I will". Leonard slid the ring onto Penny's finger and brought it up to his lips to gently kiss the ring now back to where it belonged. Penny threw both arms around Leonard's neck and kissed him deeply.
They weren't quite sure how it happened, but Penny and Leonard found themselves under the covers naked. Penny was on her back with Leonard looking deeply into her eyes. Penny began to breathe just a little faster as Leonard teased at her center, slowly and gently rocking his hips along her as he had done that last time they were together. Penny smiled at her fiancé and then gasped as he entered her. Penny's eyes immediately filled with tears as she put both arms around Leonard's neck and pulled him close to feel his chest against hers and wrapped her legs around his.
Leonard stopped when he heard the telltale halted gasps of a quiet crying. Leonard lifted his head to see Penny's eyes and tears streaming down. "Penny what is it? Am I hurting you?"
Penny let out a sigh and smiled wide as she kissed him. "No… this is just perfect… I love you so much…" pulling him back into a hug. Leonard nuzzled into his fiancée, then kissed Penny on her neck just below her left ear sending chills throughout her body. She then flipped them over and repositioned herself so Leonard could enjoy the view he loved more than anything… Each of them gasped as Penny sank down onto the love of her life. Penny let her breasts hang in front of Leonard's face as she leaned on his shoulders grinding into his hips with hers. Leonard placed his hands on Penny' waist pulling her tighter to him. Penny moaned. "Oh GOD! She then leaned back arching her back quickening her gyrations and exposing her full breasts with erect nipples.
Leonard moved his hands up her slim waist along her heaving rib cage and finally to her breasts. "Oh… yes…. Penny… yes…" Leonard pulled Penny close as he thrust deep within her as she bucked her hips, each of them climaxing at the exact time, Penny's strong contractions around Leonard causing lasting spasms.
The two lovers fell away from each other with Penny snuggling in Leonard's shoulder laying an arm across his waist as she left their legs intertwined. Leonard nuzzled into her hair and kissed her. "I love you so much Penny". Penny smiled a response as she hissed his chest. "I adore you…"
They lay in silence, Penny drawing figure eight patterns onto Leonard's bare chest and abdomen extending her strokes further down each time. Suddenly, Penny sat up, much to the dismay of her now puzzled fiancé. Penny sat cross legged beside Leonard. "Sweetie…. This is what I should have said to Sheldon…."
Leonard sat up. "I'm sorry…. Come again?"
Penny smiled and patted Leonard's knee. "Maybe a little later… But for right now, what I mean is… The first question of the experiment… This is what I should have said was the perfect day… It didn't need to be in a cabana… in the sun… with wine… This is the perfect way to spend a day… in bed… making love… And the only person I want to do that with… is you… You are my perfect guy… The second question? You again… You are the one person I want to have dinner with… for the rest of my life… And question three? If I could wake up with one quality or ability… it would be the ability to know that I could make you happy… I feel so ashamed that I didn't tell Sheldon those things…"
Leonard touched Penny's knee. "Penny… it's fine…"
Penny got up and put on a robe. "No it's not… there are so many great things about US… about YOU…" Penny went out to the kitchen and opened a drawer and took out a stack of cards. Leonard followed after putting on a t-shirt and his boxers.
Penny sat on the couch and patted the cushion next to her. "Sit here Sweetie…" She then took the rubber band off the cards and flipped the first few off. "These are the questions… I want to answer them for you. You already know three of them." Leonard sat next to her. Penny flipped the next card.
Leonard put his hand on the stack of cards. "Penny you don't have to do this… I know how you feel…"
Penny put a finger to his lips. "Sushhhhh just listen… These weren't the answers I gave Sheldon… but these are the ones I feel right now… this new experiment that I did with Sheldon didn't make me fall in love with him… It made me realize just how special YOU are. And how much I need you in my life… so these are the answers that I feel now… There are three sets of questions… If you want… you can answer them too… but later… I want you to know how I feel about you now… I don't need to see if we can fall in love… I already am IN LOVE with you." Penny sat up straight and picked up the cards and smiled at Leonard.
Set I
"Would you like to be famous? In what way? – The only thing I would want to be famous for is being the wife of the renowned high energy particle Physicist… Leonard Hofstadter"
"Before making a telephone call, do you ever rehearse what you are going to say? Why? – Nope! You always get the real me".
"When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else? – The last time I sang to someone else was when I was wearing your dress shirt making French Toast…"
"If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year-old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you want? – I don't really care… because I would be with you… you will always be sexy to me and I want us to grow together… experience life together… things will change… but that's okay"
"Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die? – I don't know… I just hope it is in your arms after so many years together"
"Name three things you and your partner appear to have in common. – our friends, our love for each other and mind blowing sex"
"For what in your life do you feel most grateful? – this one is easy… it's you Leonard… just you"
"If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be? – Being more open and not trying to please my Dad because I wasn't a boy. Maybe my opinion of boys would have been different and I wouldn't have used sex as a way to please them."
"Take four minutes and tell your partner your life story in as much detail as possible. – You pretty much already know all that"
Set II
"If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know? – How this all works out … you… me… our family…"
"Is there something that you've dreamed of doing for a long time? Why haven't you done it? – Getting married… I really am starting to wonder just when we are going to get around to that"
"What is the greatest accomplishment of your life? – Getting over all the stupid stereotypes of dating and who is who's type… getting together with you…"
"What do you value most in a friendship? – Honesty"
"What is your most treasured memory? – When you asked me out on our Schrödinger date… that kiss was AMAZING".
"What is your most terrible memory? – Breaking up with you and almost losing you to Priya".
"If you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living? Why? – I would want to be living with you… we can get back to that…"
"What does friendship mean to you? – Friendship means everything… you let someone in and you depend on each other… You are my best friend… and you have taught me so much…"
"What roles do love and affection play in your life? – I think you already know the answer to that one… they're pretty important… I'm just so lucky that you are just as affectionate… and I just love you so… so much."
Alternate sharing something you consider a positive characteristic of your partner. Share a total of five items. – We can play that game later if you want"
"How close and warm is your family? Do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people's? – My family is pretty close… we're not perfect by any stretch, but growing up on a farm… you get to be pretty tight. Even with the problems we had, I would say it was a pretty happy time for me. Things didn't start to get rough until High School… Damn hormones".
"How do you feel about your relationship with your mother? – I suppose it could be a bit better… we fought some when I was in High School, and I'm really sorry for all that".
Set III
"Make three true "we" statements each. For instance, "We are both in this room feeling ... " – Another game we can play later."
"Complete this sentence: "I wish I had someone with whom I could share ... " – Everything… I want to share everything with you… only you Leonard."
"If you were going to become a close friend with your partner, please share what would be important for him or her to know. – We are already best friends so this is pretty much a free pass… you just need to know how much I love you and how happy I am that we found each other".
"Tell your partner what you like about them; be very honest this time, saying things that you might not say to someone you've just met. – There are so many things about you… your big heart… your patience… your understanding… to many to list"
"Share with your partner an embarrassing moment in your life. – Well there was this time just the other day with Sheldon…"
"When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself? – I cried a LOT when you were going with Priya… I mean a LOT… in front of Amy… Bernadette… just about anyone… except you of course."
"Tell your partner something that you like about them already. – The whole Leonard Hofstadter experience".
"What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about? – Love and Honesty"
"If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? Why haven't you told them yet? – Telling you just how stupid I was letting you go and wasting two years. Being afraid to admit I loved you too… and then taking even more time getting to know each other again,… although I think that really worked out pretty well."
"Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Why? – Easy answer… the snowflake… because you gave it to me…"
"Of all the people in your family, whose death would you find most disturbing? Why? - I guess my brother… because he has wasted such a big part of his life… My sister has, good or bad, lived a little on the wild side, but my brother never really has settled down with anyone he was really happy with… Mom and Dad are…well Mom and DAD".
Penny stopped. "Leonard before the last question, there are some things you should know about the last couple of days..."
Leonard waived his hand. "Penny... I don't want to know".
Penny held his hand. "I did things with Sheldon that we do... to see if my feelings for him are the same as they are for you... I cuddled with him... he's too big... I didn't fit... I took him to Victoria's Secret..."
Leonard was surprised. 'Did he go in with you?"
Penny giggled. "Ran away like a scared rabbit. I cooked for him... turns out he doesn't like crunchy spaghetti any more than you do... Then there was the embarrassing moment I was talking about in that other question..."
Leonard stopped her. "Penny... no more... I only need to know you love me... Besides, you should know Raj walked in on me and Emily... she only had on a towel."
Penny sighed. "I supposed I deserved that... Did you..."
Leonard was shocked. "NO... Nothing happened... We just fell asleep and she took a shower... I just love you too much to let anything happen like that".
Penny smiled. "well then I just have the one last question...Share a personal problem and ask your partner's advice on how he or she might handle it. Also, ask your partner to reflect back to you how you seem to be feeling about the problem you have chosen. – Well, I do have this one problem… there's this guy I know… I really liked him but I didn't tell him how I felt and lost him for a while. He seems to think that I'm this really special person and he has this thing for me… he seems to think that I'm perfect… and I'm REALLY not. I keep screwing things up between us and I really need some help on how to prove to him that he's the only one for me… He may not be the tallest guy around or the buffest… but he's the BEST… the best friend… the best lover… I just don't know how I can make him believe that he is the only person I want in my life… Is there some way you can help me with this problem?
Leonard just leaned in and kissed her… He placed a hand on her cheek and softly held her so he could gently show her how much she meant to him. Penny brought both arms up and wrapped them around Leonard's neck and deepened the kiss.
They pulled back and Penny gazed at the smile on Leonard's face that mimicked the one she could not stop from forming. Sweetie... I love you so... so... much. I didn't think this was a good idea in the beginning, but I'm okay now. I never want to be without you ever again. Your my guy and I'm your girl. No more experiments... no more questions... no more doubts. So... where do we go from here?"
Leonard looked deeply into Penny's eyes. "Well for starters… we can go across the hall and tell Sheldon that the experiment is over… and that it was a failure…"
Penny smiled. "Oh, we're gonna tell him all right, but I'm not so sure it was a failure. Cause I sure am in love with someone pretty special…" She then lifted her left hand and waved her engagement ring. They both got up from the couch and found their clothes, quickly putting them on before going across the hall to 4A.
Penny and Leonard walked across the hall to see all their friends looking a little confused while talking with Amy and Sheldon.
Penny smiled when she heard Raj ask what this all meant. "It means the experiment is over… it means that Sheldon and I have feelings for each other… just like we said… We are close and we love each other but we are IN LOVE with two very special other people. Sheldon… no offense… but I'm moving out… all my stuff needs to be moved back into 4B…"
Sheldon took the Relationship Agreement and placed the two halves into the waste bin next to his desk. "No offense taken…I think getting back to normal would be an exceptional alternative to the chaos that has ensued over the last few days."
Amy smiled and took Sheldon's arm. "Yes, we have torn up the Relationship Agreement and are now going to embark on a journey where no Sheldon has gone before… spontaneity…"
Sheldon looked down at Amy. "What part of the word Normal are you having trouble with?"
Bernadette smiled. "Well Howard and I have a new agreement. We are going to treat each other like equals.. I'm not going to baby him anymore and he is going to keep up his end of the work at home."
Howard shrugged. "Just don't judge us when you come over to the house… there might be a small learning curve".
Emily smiled. "Well, Raj and I have agreed to talk out any issues we have… I promised to let him "in" more and I will be toning down what he thinks is creepy… and we will discuss how we will spend our evenings together. Although I still might have some surprises just for fun… He let me have Halloween…"
Raj smiled. "So next Thursday… we are hosting an evening of dinner and movie… We will be dining on a very delicate rabbit stew while watching The Sound of Music".
Penny smiled. "Well, NORMAL may have to have another little twist to it. We're only going to move MY stuff… Leonard's stuff is going to stay right where it is. Right where it belongs... in OUR apartment... 4B... soon to be... The Hofstadter's... Mr. and Mrs. ... DOCTOR and Mrs. Leonard and Penny Hofstadter " Penny waved her engagement ring so everyone could see that she had it back on her finger.
Leonard's jaw dropped a bit. "Whaaaaa?"
Penny patted Leonard on the chest. "It's Okay Sweetie… I told you we would get back to that question…"
Everyone let out a collective "AWWWWwww" while they moved in for a group hug.
A/N There you have it the conclusions that could bring each couple closer together and the realization that the outward appearance of a bond between two close special friends is just that and nothing more. The reflection by Penny and Sheldon on their existing relationships with Leonard and Amy and the admission that these relationships are bound to their future happiness.
I thank all the readers from each and every Ship's harbor.