Chapter 1: Rebellion.

Disclaimer: For the twenty first time, I do not own the Fosters.

AN: This is my second Jonnor story. My first is called Shared, and is on my profile. I couldn't decide what to write for this, so I just decided to start from the beginning, as was suggested in a few of the reviews for Shared. This first chapter begins during the season 2 finale, and is slightly AU, and shows a Jude who has had enough of getting pushed around and is not afraid to fight for Connor.

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Jude's POV:

I woke up with a jolt, the memories of the last few days returning to torture me now that sleep wasn't there to keep them at bay. My mind immediately leapt to Connor.

He had told his dad. Connor had actually told his father that he was gay. And Adam Stevens was trying to stop me from seeing him.

I massaged my temples, desperately attempting to fend off the monstrosity of a migraine that was building.

I walked into the bathroom, the myriad of thoughts swirling around in my head. I grabbed my toothbrush, and reached to pick up the toothpaste, but my fingers brush against smooth glass. My fingers gently pick up the small bottle of blue nail polish. I stare at it for a moment before looking at myself in the mirror. My mind immediately wandered back to when Connor had painted his nails to defend me at the beginning of our friendship. I remembered the conversation we had after we left the cafeteria that day.

"Why did you do it Connor? People might do to you what they do to me."

"They won't. They won't touch you again, because you're my friend now, Jude. Besides, I like to think of it as something more than nail polish. It's not just nail polish, it's... war paint."

I held my gaze in the mirror for a second before looking back at the nail polish.

"War paint." I whispered to myself.

I thought of everything that Connor and I had been through together. All the things he has done for me.

He befriended me when nobody else would. Offering a hand of kindness and compassion to a misfit foster kid who he had never seen before in his life. Painting his nails in my defense. Giving me his $200 PSP because he saw that I didn't have many belongings. Trying as best he could to make me feel accepted and welcomed and included. Disobeying his father and continuing his friendship with me in spite of him. Kissing me in the tent. Kissing me in my room. Sneaking out with the express purpose of getting alone time with me afterwards. Pushing me out of the way when the gun went off. Coming out to his dad because he liked me.

And now, Adam Stevens was grinding all that to a halt?

"You know what?" I say to myself, "I've had enough."

I grab the nail polish and bolt back to my room to get dressed. I dig through my closet, and decide on a blue pull over and jeans. I sit down on the floor and quickly paint my nails.

Connor and I were more than friends now. I wasn't going to allow his bigoted ass of a father to ruin that when it's only just begun.

I had conformed to what everybody told me to do for my entire life.

Maybe it's time for a bit of rebellion.

I marched down the stairs. Stef and Lena are both at work, and all the siblings are out of the house doing their normal routines. I marched to the garage and got my bike and headed towards the hospital.

When I got there, I parked my bike and chained it to the bike rack. I stalked into the lobby and to the elevator, taking it up to the floor where I knew Connor was. When the elevator opened, I walked out and took a right, heading down to the nurses' station.

"Excuse me?" I said to the nurse, "I'm looking for Connor Stevens' room."

"And you are?" She asked.

"His cousin." I lied through my teeth.

"Room 325 down the hall." She said and pointed me down the hallway.

I nodded my thanks and headed down the hallway and I caught sight of the room at the end of the corridor. As I got closer the door opened, and Adam walked out, closing the door behind him. He caught sight of me and frowned. I only hesitated for a second before approaching him.

"What are you doing here?" He asked coldly, "I told your moms I didn't want you hanging around Connor."

"I know." I said.

I took a deep breath.

"I want to see him." I continued, "I want to see my friend, and I'm not leaving until I do?"

He looked me up and down, before shaking his head.

"It's not gonna happen."

I ducked around him and marched towards the door and plopped down right next to it.

"What the hell are you doing now?" Adam asked, a slight tint of anger in his voice.

"Did you think I was joking, Mr. Stevens?" I ask him, "You are going to let me into that room to see Connor, or I'm not leaving this spot."

"You're not welcome here." He growled, trying to look intimidating.

I scoffed at him.

"Scaring me off isn't going to work. You don't hold a candle to some of the foster parents I have had in the past."

He withdrew his phone, and angrily punched in a number.

"Lena, it's Adam. Connor's father... yeah, Jude just showed up at the hospital. He's refusing to leave. Get up here and get him."

He hung up the phone , and I continued to glare at him.

It only took Lena twenty minutes to get there, during which time I had surrendered my new sport of glaring at Mr. Stevens in favor of staring straight ahead with a stubborn expression on my face. I heard her approach Adam.

"I'm gonna go get a cup of coffee." He said, "When I get back, he needs to be gone. Otherwise I'm gonna call security."

He stomped off, and I let out a soft growl of irritation that was too soft for Lena to hear. She sat down next to me.

She sighed and placed a comforting hand on my knee. I could feel my resolve start to break.

"I know how hard this must be for you honey, I really do." She says in a soothing voice, "Losing a friend is one of the most painful things to go through."

But she didn't know, did she? She had no idea what this was like.

"Mr. Stevens made it very clear that..."

Something in me snapped.

"He's not my friend." I say bluntly, desperately trying to hold off the tears that I can feel coming.

I could feel her staring at me.

"Connor's not your friend?" She asks me, slightly confused.

I shake my head. I knew there was no other way. I had to tell her the truth.

"There were no girls. In the tent. On the camping trip." I confess, my voice thicker than usual from the effort to halt the oncoming sobs, "It was just us. We kissed, and now we're like..."

"More than friends." She finished for me.

My resolve crumbled, and the first tear rolled down my cheeks.

"Connor." I choked, "He told his dad."

I finally let go and cried. Lena drew me into her arms and tried her best to comfort me.

After a few seconds the tears subsided, and she looked down the hall. I followed her gaze.

Anger quickly replaced sadness at the sight of Mr. Stevens standing their watching.

"Let me handle this." Lena said and got up, stalking towards him.

I stared straight ahead, straining my ears to pick up what was being said. I took a split second to thank god for my above average hearing.

"You can't keep them apart forever Adam." Lena said bluntly, "What about school?"

"I'm pulling him from Anchor Beach." Adam responded, equally blunt.

"With just a few weeks left in the school year?" Lena questioned incredulously, "He'll have to repeat the grade."

Mr. Stevens shrugged, and I had a really strong urge to roll my eyes, which I resisted with great difficulty.

"And then what? You gonna lock him up until he's eighteen?" Lena soldiered on, "Look. You can keep Jude outside the door as long as you want. As long as you're willing to... stand watch, but what then? You gonna keep all the boys outside the door?"

His head shot up to meet her gaze, a look of pained realization on his face. I couldn't help feel a little satisfied.

"You can try, but trust me if you do, you'll be the one who ends up getting shut out." She finished.

Mr. Stevens looked down, fiddling with the rim of his coffee cup for a second before looking back up at Lena.

"I don't care if your son is gay." He said.

I bristled as he called me gay, and bristled more when I saw that he looked like he was about to cry.

"I just don't want mine to be." Adam said.

I snorted. Both Adam and Lena looked down at me.

I stood and marched towards them, a glare on my face.

"First of all, don't call me that." I say in a voice cold enough to freeze blood, "I hate labels, and I refuse to use them or allow them to be applied to me. And secondly, banning him from seeing me isn't going to stop Connor from being gay. It isn't my fault he's like this."

Lena is staring at me.

"Jude, honey..." She says, trying to intervene.

"No. It's my turn to talk." I interrupt, "You think that I turned your son gay? Is that it?"

Mr. Stevens nodded uncomfortably.

"You want in on a little secret, Mr. Stevens?" I asked him, he nodded," Connor and I have kissed. Twice. And both times, he was the one who leaned in first. NOT ME. So your argument makes no sense!"

"When?" He asked.

"The first time was in the tent on the camping trip," I said bluntly, "We were talking about stuff, somehow we ended up sitting next to each other in my sleeping bag. He's talking to me about how he wishes we could still hang out more and spend the night at each other's houses like we used to, and how he wished his dad wasn't so much of a, and I quote; a homophobic jerk."

He flinched.

"He started crying, and I hugged him and comforted him. We looked each other in the eyes, and he leaned in and kissed me." I continued waspishly, "The second time was in my room, after I snapped at him about his mixed signals. Again, he lent in first."

"Also, the whole break in and drink thing? Taylor's idea." I continued after pausing to draw a breath, "She caught onto the fact that I had feelings for Connor, and suggested it. She nudged me a nodded her head to Connor, who was staring at me with a dopy close mouthed grin on his face. The only reason he agreed, was because it would give him an excuse to kiss me again. I spent the whole bike ride to Taylor's place trying to talk him out of it."

He stared at me, surprised at the final piece of info.

"Why do you look so surprised?" I ask him, "Is it the fact that Taylor tried to set us up? Surprised that she doesn't hate us for being gay like you do?"

"Hey, now. I don't hate you! And I certainly don't hate my son!"

"Could've fooled me!" I hissed back, "You say you love your son? Act like it."

"Why are you fighting so hard?" He asks.

"Because it's Connor that I'm fighting for." I shoot back as if it's obvious, "Connor is worth fighting for."

Adam let out a deep breath. He stared at the floor for a moment, before looking up to meet my gaze.

"I don't want my son getting hurt." Adam said sadly, "If he's gay, his life is gonna be so much harder. You two would be looked at differently everywhere you go. People could hurt you. People could hurt him. I don't want that to happen."

My glare softens, as I'm reminded that underneath the macho homophobic exterior was a father who would never want his son to get hurt.

"Then help me protect him." I said, "We both have one thing in common. We both love Connor, and neither of us wants to see him hurt. When he hit the ground after getting shot, I ripped the table cloth and tried to wrap it to stop the bleeding. It didn't work, but I still tried. If anybody says anything to us, we'll say something back. If we have to fight, we will. If I have to fight off his baseball team when they find out about us, I will. If I have to protect him from you, then I will. I will never let anybody hurt him. I will help keep him safe, or die trying."

Adam reached up and massaged his forehead for a minute, before dropping his arm to his side.

"Fine." He caved, "But don't make me regret this, Foster. If you break my son's heart, I will hunt you down."

"I won't." I promise.

He nods, and hesitantly steps around me and walks to the door and opens it, stepping inside.

He steps aside to allow me entrance.

Connor and I make eye contact, and his lips twitch into a smile. I walk forward, returning his smile. He pushes himself up in bed, looking at me with a look of happiness that made him look younger than his years. I approached the side of the bed. He reached out and gently took my hand into his. After a second he noticed the nail polish, and adjusted his hold to examine them.

"What's this?" He asks softly, looking up to meet my gaze.

"War paint." I respond.

His eyes widen slightly and he nods with a wide grin splitting his face. I grin back at him. I turn my eyes to the TV with a questioning look.

He scoots over and I slide onto the bed next to him, sitting so that our shoulders are touching.

We sit in silence for a few minutes before Connor broke the silence.

"I'm so glad you're here, Jude." He whispered, leaning his head on my shoulder. I shivered slightly at the feeling.

It felt so right.

"So am I."

"Surprised Dad let you in." He said with a frown.

"Told him I wanted to see you and wasn't leaving until then. He told me no again, so I sat down outside the door. He calls Lena. With her help, we got him to cave in and let me see you."

"I'm glad." Connor said.

"You came out to your dad, Connor." I said to him, "A month ago, that was unheard of. How did you do it?"

"He was badgering me about why I snuck out." Connor tells me, "Asked if it was because of Daria. I was sick of lying, so I snapped, and I told him I snuck out to see you. He asked what I meant, and I didn't lie. I told him I was gay, and that I had a crush on you. He stomped out of the room. I haven't spoken a word to him since. When he's in here, I just sit here and glare at him. Broke up with Daria when she came up to visit me too. Told her everything. Apologized for using her like I did. She understood. Wished me luck."

"I'm proud of you, you know that?" I tell him.

"For what?" Connor asked confused, "I should have done this after I kissed you in the tent! I've treated you like shit the last month!"

"Connor." I try to interrupt, but he keeps ranting.

"I stole your first kiss," He continues ranting, tears leaking from his eyes, "Then I made out with Daria in front of you, when we both knew I didn't like it! Then I started fucking with your feelings with all my mixed messages, my idiocy almost got us killed when we snuck out! I feel so bad for everything, Jude. You're my best friend, the only real one I have! And after the way I treated you, you're still willing to come up here and fight for me? You deserve so much better than me!"

"I DON'T WANT BETTER!" I shouted back, "I WANT YOU!"

I shock him into silence. I hear the door open behind us, and I turn around to see Adam and Lena standing there watching. I turn back to Connor, choosing to ignore them.

"I forgive you, okay?" I said, "I get it. You were confused, you were scared. I don't blame you, I'm scared too. But you're worth fighting for."

"No I'm not." He said quietly.

"Yes you are." I said, my tone offering no room for disagreement, "You are worth fight a war over, Connor. You always have been, and after everything we've been through together, you always will be. You befriended me, you stuck up for me when nobody else did, you gave me your little Play Station without a seconds hesitation because I didn't have much stuff. You made me feel normal, you made me feel accepted, like nobody had ever done before. It would have been impossible NOT to develop this crush on you. All the good you've done far outweighs the bad."

I lean down a place a kiss on his forehead, and then I stare into his deep brown eyes.

"Can I kiss you again?" Connor asked. I frown slightly.

"Your dad and Lena are standing at the door watching us, you realize that don't you?" I said.

"I don't care." He said.

This time I lent in first.

It was soft, sweet, and right. The beeping of the machines, the hum of the air conditioning, the sound coming from the television, all melted away. The only thing that existed was us. Connor deepened the kiss. In the back of my mind it barely registered that we were making out for the first time.

When we finally separated, we both exhaled shuddering breaths.

That kiss was different. It was the start of something new.

"So, um." He tried to say, "Umm. Wow, that was uh."

"I know." I said with a breathy laugh. He giggled at me.

"So, what does this make us now?" He asks me, "I mean, we'll always be best friends no matter what, but it feels... different now."

"What do you want to do?" I ask him.

He looks at me for a minute before answering me.

"I want you to be my boyfriend." He answers, "If you'll have me."

"Do you want to keep it a secret at school?" I ask him, slightly dreading the answer.

"There is a couple of people I know who I want to tell in person." Connor answers, "A couple of them are coming over to visit me when I get out of here the day after tomorrow. I want you to be there with me when I do. After that I promise I won't hide you. You deserve better than to be kept a secret. I'll walk you to your classes. I'll carry your stuff. I'll hold your hand and kiss you in the hallways at school, I'll take you to the dances, and to hell with what everybody says. If I'm gonna be your boyfriend, I'm gonna do it right."

I smile at him.

"Okay." I agree, "I can live with that. I want to tell my siblings in person too. Boyfriends it is."

I hear a throat clear behind us. We turn to see that Lena and Adam have stepped into the room.

"Jude honey, we need to get going." Lena said.

Connor stared at Adam, a slightly fearful expression on his face.

"How much of our talk did you guys here?" Connor asked.

"Enough." Adam said, and exhaled deeply before meeting Connors gaze.

"Nothing you say is gonna changed my mind about this. This isn't going away. This isn't gonna change." Connor said, "I'm gonna date Jude, whether you like it or not. I should have done this months ago."

"I know this isn't going to go away." Adam replied after a minute, his voice full of resignation, "I don't get it. I don't like it. But... but if this what you want. If he truly makes you happy... I'll try my best. Just be patient with me okay?"

Connor stares at him.

"So your gonna give me my phone back then and unblock Jude's number? Let us hang out again?" Connor asked. "Let us spend the night at each other's houses again?"

"If the door stays open at all times, and if you both promise that there'll be no funny business..." Adam started.

Connor and I both turned red.

"We're thirteen, dad. Neither of us is gonna be doing that for a long, loooooong time." Connor said exasperatedly.

In the back of my mind I remembered Taylors comment about how Daria wanted to lose her virginity and made a mental note to mention it later.

"Fine. Yes." Adam says reluctantly through gritted teeth.

"I don't want to hear any bad talk about us either." Connor pushed on, "No slurs, no snarky comments about it."

"That's acceptable." Adam responds, "As long as he makes you happy."

"He makes me happy, dad." Connor said, "He lights up the room when I see him, he makes me feel short of breath. I can barely get through the day without hearing his voice."

"Good." Adam said. "Like I said, I'll try."

"Thank you, Mr. Stevens." I said. He turned to look at me, shocked. "I know this is hard for you to accept, but thank you."

He nods at me. I turn back to Connor and give him another kiss.

"I gotta go. I'll text you tomorrow."

I head towards the door, but stop next to Mr. Stevens.

"Thank you." I said, "I promise you, you won't regret this."

He nodded a stiff nod at me. I turned to Lena.

"Let's go."

We left the room and headed towards the elevator. When the doors closed she turned to me.

"So... boyfriends huh?" She said with a smile.

I nod and giggle.

"I'm so happy for you, honey." She said.

"For the first time in a long time," I said, "It feels like everything is gonna be okay. For the first time in a long time, I have hope for the future. As long as I have Connor, I think I'll be okay."

I held up my hand and looked at my nails and smiled.

"You painted your nails? You haven't done that in a while." Lena said.

"That day I wore it to school for the second time, Connor did to. He did it to show that he would stick up for me. This is more than just nail polish to us."

"What is it?" She asked.

"It's our war paint."