Author's Note: I watched Aladdin for the first time recently, and kept on picturing Pacifica and Dipper, and… this happened. It's not great, but… Whatever. Love me or hate me, just review me! Or, you know, not. Either way is good. I like reviews though, and try to take all the viewers' opinions and put them into the story… Whatever. This Author's Note has gone on too long.

Oh, and some of the characters are from both universes, and others are just OC's, but no major characters. However, some characters are drastically changed.

Italics are lyrics mostly shoplifted right from the movie.

It begins on a dark night, where a dark man waits, with a dark purpose…

Okay, sure. Let's play up that whole "dark" aspect. News flash! The dark isn't always bad!

In this case, however, it was… not great.

"You're late," the man, a vicious, power-hungry man by the name of Gideon, hissed at the thief who he's been waiting for from up on his high horse. Literally, he was riding on a horse.

"Yeah, yeah, a thousand apologies, I came didn't I?" the young girl said sassily.

"You have it?" Gideon enquired.

"Duh," the girl smirked, "I mean, I had to… well, my manicure didn't exactly prove to be blood-proof, but I got it."

"Give it to me," the pale man with the white hair insisted.

"Jesus, calm your farm," the girl rolled her eyes. "Give me my treasures first."

Suddenly, a parrot swooped down and grabbed half of a medallion out of her shirt.

"Hey! Tell your damn bird to quit feeling me up!" the girl complained.

"Don't be alarmed. You will get what's coming to you," Gideon hissed.

"What's coming to you! Aawk!" The bird screeched.

"I don't want 'what's coming to me,' I want the price we agreed on," the girl spoke through gritted teeth.

"Here," Gideon pulled a bag of gold out of his sleeve. "You'll find two-hundred gold pieces in there."

"Thanks," the girl muttered, looking in and quickly counting out 203. "You gave me three extra, you know," she told him.

"Consider it your tip," he smirked, a thin, disturbed smirk.

"Great," the girl said, before vanishing into the night.

Gideon pulled a second half of the amulet out of his sleeve, and pieced the two together to form a shooting star, which leapt from his hands and flew across the desert of Arabia.

Gideon kicked his horse, and rode off, in pursuit of the star, which eventually buried itself in the sand.

A majestic cave, shaped like the head of a lioness, rose from the ground.

"At last," Gideon murmured.

"You again? I thought I told you to leave me alone," the lioness growled. "Only one dude can get in here, and it sure isn't you!"

"Who is it then?" Gideon asked, anger in his voice.

"One who's worth lies within," the lioness said with a grin. "A diamond in the rough. Seek him out, and you gain access to the lamp."

With that, the lioness quit talking, and blew Gideon and his bird across the desert, and covering them in bright pink glitter. (A/N: Who knows who the genie is?)

"Great," the bird groaned. "Just fantastic! Where are we supposed to find a diamond in the rough?"

Dipper Pines was running across the roof of a shop, a loaf of bread in his hand.

"Stop, thief!" a guard called after him.

"Dude, has telling someone, 'Stop, thief' really ever worked for you?" Dipper called over his shoulder.

"I'll have your hands for a trophy!" the guard hollered.

Dipper looked down at his hands. "You still aren't making me want to stop," he laughed.

He jumped off the roof to zip-line across two clotheslines, collecting various apparel as he did so.

Unfortunately, that was when he slammed into a brick wall and fell to the ground.

"Ugh!" he rubbed his head, and saw Lazy Susan, the washerwoman, laughing at him.

"Morning Lazy Susan," he said cheerfully.

"Well, I see you're getting into trouble early today," she remarked.

"Nah, it's only trouble if you get caught…" Dipper trailed off as a guard yanked him up my the front of his shirt. "…I'm in trouble."

However, just at that moment, a monkey pulled the guard's turban below his eyes, and Dipper pulled free.

"Gotta keep one jump ahead of the bread line; one swing ahead of the sword! I only steal what I can't afford- that's everything!" Dipper sang out.

As he sang, he quickly escaped only the top of a pile of barrels.

"One jump ahead of the lawmen, that's all, and that's no joke! These guys don't appreciate that I'm broke!"

He kicked several barrels down on the guards, and ran to the top of a platform. However, he left when the guards began shaking the platform, and ducked into a window.

"I can take a hint, got to face the facts: you're my only friend Soos!" Dipper told the monkey. Then, he realized he had jumped into the middle of a harem, and the girls were all smirking.

"Who?" they asked, alarmed. Then, taking in the scene, they began teasing him relentlessly.

"Oh, it's sad, Dipper here has hit the bottom," a snarky redhead said, giving him a shove.

"He's become a one-man rise in crime!" a pretty, petite girl he recognized as Candy told the others, laughingly.

"I would blame the parents, except that he hasn't got them!" a muscular girl named Grenda joked.

Dipper laughed. "I've gotta eat to live; gotta steal to eat; I'll tell you all about it when I've got the time!" he said before jumping into the street, and hiding behind a row of fish barrels, but then looked up and saw the fish vendor glaring at him, and rushed away, to be chased by guards.

"All this for a loaf of bread?" he muttered. "One jump ahead of the slowpokes! One skip ahead of my doom! Next time I'm going to use a nom de plume!" (A/N: Yep, that's the lyric, no, I don't get it.)

As Dipper ducked a sword, he rolled his eyes, and proceeded to run across a flock of sheep.

"One jump ahead of the hit man! One hit ahead of the flock…" Hit eyes lit up as an idea came to him. "I think I'll take a stroll around the block!"

He lead the men through an alley riddled with performers, including a man on a bed of nails, a… what was that, a priestess?... walking across hot coals, and a man swallowing swords… one of which Soos stole.

"Shit, he's got a sword!" a guard yelled.

"We all have swords," another deadpanned, and stuck his own against Dipper's jugular, making him press against the door.

"Um… let's not be too hasty!" Dipper tried to talk the guards down, but was saved by the door opening and a teasing girl giving him room to get away.

"Still, I think he's rather tasty," she said, causing the guards' attention to be momentarily shifted…

Until, that is, Dipper swung his arm around their shoulders cheerfully.

"Look, I gotta eat to live; gotta steal to eat; otherwise we'd get along!" he smirked at the guards turned to him- he was already on the next roof. They chased him, but he showed plenty of bravado to the crowd that had gathered, and was yelling angrily at him.

"One jump ahead of the hoof beats! One hop ahead of the hump! One trick ahead of disaster, yeah they're big, but hey, I'm faster!"

The guards had chased him to the edge of the roof, and Dipper looked down.

"End of the line, Thief," a guard grunted out.

Dipper smiled, and grabbed a carpet.

"Okay, here goes, better throw my hand in! Wish me a happy landing, all I have to do is jump!"

With those words, he jumped right off the roof, using the carpet as a parachute until he landed safely in an alleyway, leaving the guards behind.

"Well," Dipper shrugged, looking at the bread, "I guess it's time for dinner..." he trailed off, seeing a young girl with her smaller friend digging through old scraps. He split the bread in half, and gave half to Soos, and tossed his own half to the kids.

"Take it," he told the kids, who smiled.

"Thank you," the girl whispered.

Soos, with a roll of his eyes, tossed the girls his half as well. Dipper smiled. Then, he saw- what else? - Another child in need, running in front of a horse on which a rich-looking blond guy sat.

Dipper ran up to get to the kid, but was very surprised- not to mention pissed- when the man, who in all actuality didn't look much older than he himself (15), shouted at the kid.

"Out of the way, you filthy brat!"

Dipper jumped right in front of the horse.

"Hey, rich boy!" he called up.

"Ugh, why must the riffraff interrupt me? I am here to woo the princess!" the guy complained.

"Doubtful. The princess won't be interested in a guy who can't even afford to buy himself manners!" he called, angrily.

The guy kicked Dipper right into a mud puddle.

"Ah, would you look at the street urchin," he simpered. "You know, a flea-bitten rat like you isn't even worth my time."

With that, the blond guy entered the palace, leaving Dipper to walk off, fury in his gait.

"I'm not worthless," he muttered. "I bet I'm smarter than Blondie, anyway. And I don't have fleas."

He trekked up to the abandoned building where he was staying, and looked around.

"Riffraff, street rat, I don't buy that. If they looked closer, would they see a poor boy? No siree. They'd find out there's so much more to me…"

He pulled back a curtain to look at the beautiful palace.

"Someday, Soos, we're living there. We'll have servants, and books, and go to school… real school, not just learning out of swiped books. Some day, all our problems will dissapear."