Around the regs

By KaseyJae

First of all, hello and thanks for giving my story a try!

Summary: They were always aware of their feelings for each other, even if they couldn't live them out. Or not that often, that was…
This is a collection of unrelated one-shots of moments, during which Sam and Jack get a chance to reveal and/or act out their feelings for each other, verbally as well as physically, with the occasional alien influence thrown into the mix…

This actually started out as some sort of outlet for all the stories swarming my head, but before I knew it, it's gotten quite out of hand. I had kinda challenged myself to see, how many situations I could come up with, where Jack and Sam could get their way without being court-martialled and so it grew and grew…

Please note that since none of these situations would have ever happened in the Stargate universe, they are bound to be OOC. I'll try my best, however, to stay in character.

Also, since I've only recently been introduced into Stargate SG-1, decades after this has been aired, I'm pretty sure that nothing I've come up with, hasn't been done before, probably even by authors much better than I am. This is just my try on things.

Author's note: I'm relatively new to Stargate SG-1, and while I write Fanfiction for some time now, I'm even newer to actually posting something.
This is the first story I've actually worked up the courage to put up and I'll try to do my very best with it.
Still, please note, that English is not my first language and this is unbeta-ed! So not only are all mistakes my own for not knowing any better, but, yeah, you'll probably find plenty of them…

Rating: T
There will be a few chapters that need to be rated M, but the story as a whole is not. I will specifically point out the chapters, where the rating will change, so you can skip them, if you wish. However, I will abide to this site's rules, so you won´t read anything too graphic in here.

Feedback: Yes, please!
I try to improve my English and writing skills, so constructive feedback will be very much appreciated!

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, places and settings belong to their rightful owners: Stargate Productions, Showtime/Viacom, MGM, Double Secret Productions and Gekko Productions.
Any resemblances to persons, events, stories or locations are purely coincidentally.
This work is simply for entertainment purposes and no copyright infringement is intended. Also, no money is made out of this.
However, this story, any original characters, the settings and situations are property of the author and not to be copied or distributed!

So, last but not least, enjoy!

Around the regs

Chapter One: Name

"…Eeeww!", Sam muttered under her breath, cautiously moving her hand to prod a finger into the wriggly goo that stained her protection vest and her BDU jacket over her stomach and sloshed down onto the thighs of her BDU pants in fat splashes.

"Oh, for cryin'… Daniel!", Jack yelled angrily, while swiping the sticky stuff that had managed to splatter onto his whole upper torso from his chin and his throat, flicking it away from his fingers with a disgusted expression, before wiping them indifferently on his sleeves.
In front of them, poor Daniel looked like the proverbial poodle drenched in the not-really-appetizing slime.

"What…?", the archaeologist asked dazed, turning back for his friends. The Colonel glared at him pointedly, even if the linguist had to wipe his glasses first to notice.

"Oh, please!", he huffed. "Jack, you can't really hold me responsible for that!"

"Oh, I can't?", Jack smiled back much too sweetly. "Strange, I thought you were the one supposed to warn us of such traps!"

Daniel's eyes narrowed, partly because he had to squint to see something through his soiled glasses and partly because he was getting annoyed with his friend. "Jack, just because I understand the language on this planet and I have been to excavations of ritual sites before, doesn't mean I can foresee traps!"

"No?! Because that's why I even let you take point in the first place! You said there would be traps and you would be able to recognize them!", Jack barked and his voice ricocheted from the narrow walls surrounding them.

"Yes, I said that. But well, I honestly expected another kind of traps, that's why I overlooked this one…", Daniel admitted.

"Why? What's wrong with this trap? Not disgusting enough?"

"Sir, I think Daniel concentrated on traps more… lethal.", Sam jumped in to defend her friend. "He couldn't really know that we would nearly manage a few steps into this pyramid only to get sprayed with… slime, of all things…"

Daniel nodded enthusiastically to her words and Jack caved. "Point taken. Will you identify the next trap or do I have to take lead?"

Daniel rolled his eyes. "I think, now I've got a pretty good idea, what we're up against. It seems this culture is not only influenced by Ancient Egypt, but also–"

"Daniel!"

"Um… I know what I will have to look for, now. I should be able to find the traps. But we should move on a little slower.", Daniel summed it up, when the Colonel's eyebrow began twitching in a telltale way.

"Alright.", Jack decided, before he turned back for Teal'c. "Teal'c, we're… Wait! How come you haven't gotten soaked in that stuff?"

Teal'c grinned at SG-1's leader, who looked at him a little enviously, with a small, satisfied smile. "Since you have commanded me to stay at the back of our group for the time being, I have gotten spared. I believe I have to thank you and Major Carter for intercepting what would have surely been headed my way."

"Gee, you're welcome…", the Colonel murmured sarcastically, when a movement caught his attention from the corner of his eyes. Jack turned his head and noticed Carter swatting at something on her belt, trying to brush it down.

"Carter?", he asked confused. "What's wrong? Oh please don't tell me, I have to worry about getting assaulted with junk next?"

"No, sir, it's just… Ah!", she twitched uncomfortably, her whole body trembling for a second, before she began to scrub her hands over her thighs earnestly.
Jack's eyes narrowed suspiciously and he stepped up to her, getting worried. "Carter…"

"Oh… god…!", Daniel now groaned and when Jack turned his head, he saw his friend slapping at his arms frantically.

"What the hell's…?", Jack began, but a whimper from Sam interrupted him.

"Sir, it's… it's burning!", she said, tucking at her protection vest to get it away from her skin.

"Burning…?", he echoed, when Daniel suddenly cut in: "Jack, the slime's acidic! It´s burning through our clothes…!"

Daniel had merely said the words, when the Colonel felt it, too. An uncomfortable burn began to spread, where the goo glued his shirt to his chest and soon it was getting painful.
"Oh, for crying out loud!", he cursed, while ripping first his protection vest open and then his BDU jacket. It didn't help much, though. The stuff had gorged through his black t-shirt underneath and had reached his bare skin. Jack tried to wipe it away with the edges of his jacket, but it stuck to him.

Next to him, he heard Sam moan painfully, when the slime started attacking her hands with which she had tried to rub it away. Jack looked over to her and was greeted with her slightly panicky eyes looking right back.

"Water!", he shouted. "We need to wash it off!"

"There was a small pond a little to the right side of the pyramid's entrance.", Teal'c supplied helpfully.

Thank god, Jack mused, it was exactly what they needed right now! Without thinking, he grabbed unto the person closest to him – Carter – and dashed off, yelling for Daniel and Teal'c to follow them.
Together, they hurried out of the pyramid, almost falling down the flight of steps leading up to the entrance room. Taking two steps at a time, Jack noticed the irony. They hadn't even managed more than a few steps into the pyramid Daniel had been pestering him for weeks to get the chance to examine before they were literally running away again. And there weren't even Jaffa involved. Actually, the whole planet had been deserted for dozens of years from what Daniel had deduced from the writings on several, interesting rocks they had found, but yeah, still dangerous in his whole own way…
Jack might have been inclined to find it funny, but right now he really had other problems.

Reaching the end of the stairs, Jack rushed off towards the direction Teal'c had pointed out, dragging his stumbling 2IC along by the wrist he had an iron grip on with his hand.
He heard her whimper behind him in pain and the blistering sensation on his own skin was getting unbearable, so he couldn't help the relieved sign that escaped his lips, when the clear-watered pond came into view.

Jack all but skidded to a halt next to the water's edge and unceremoniously dropped his backpack, followed by his P90. His open protection vest and his BDU jacket fell to the ground and quietly sizzled along, completely forgotten by their owner.

The moment he was freed, Jack went to help Sam. With quick movements, he clipped off her backpack and her personal defense weapon, throwing them to the ground next to his. With slightly shaking fingers due to the pain he was in, he zipped open her protection vest and while she worked on shedding it, he attacked the zipper on her BDU jacket. As soon as he had her freed as well, he shooed them into the water. Sam groaned audibly, when the cold water hit her tortured skin, but Jack managed to bite back the curse that was threatening to spill. He had only managed to get Carter thigh-deep into the clear water, when Teal'c arrived with Daniel. The poor archaeologist hung limply in the Jaffa's arms, whimpering pitiful from the agonizing pain he had to be in. Teal'c didn´t even stop in his stomping forwards, when he relieved Daniel from his backpack and his weapon, dropping them to the ground, before he marched into the water and, reaching knee-depth, dunked the linguist under.

Seeing that Teal'c had everything under control, Jack went back to the task at hand: rescuing him and Carter. By now they had waded out far enough to be under water up to their necks. Or more precisely, her neck and his shoulders. Jack gripped his ruined t-shirt that now had large holes in it and hoisted it over his head, carefully maneuvering it around his dog tags. Not bothering with the destroyed garment, Jack let it simply sink to the ground. Finally free, he almost sighed at the relief the cold water was offering for his mistreated skin.
But he didn't let himself dwell for long. He took a second to check his pants, but fortunately they hadn't gotten stained, so he was blissfully unharmed below the waist.
Then, almost immediately his eyes went towards Sam, who was miserably trying to get out of her own burning clothes, but her raw hands were making it difficult for her.

"C'mere.", he murmured. "Lemme do it."

Thankful, Sam gave in and let him take over, shooting him a small, suffering smile. Jack laid his hands on her waist, running his fingers down until he found her belt under water and then began pulling her shirt from her pants. With a little difficulty because of the water the shirt had gotten soaked with, he dragged it up and over her head, carefully steering her injured hands and arms out of it.

Jack tried his best to not look at the black sports bra that greeted him and glued his eyes to her face. Her dog tags fell back against her chest, glinting in the reflecting sunlight from the water, almost begging him to look, but he remained stubborn.

"Better?", he asked, clinging to his professionalism.

She shook her head miserably and for a moment he feared her undergarments had gotten sullied as well. No way was he taking those off!

"Thighs…!", she ground out through tightly clenched teeth.

Oh, it had hit her pants. It had hit… oh. Inhaling, Jack steeled himself. He could do that, no problem. Carter needed help and she needed it immediately. So get a grip!

"Alright.", he said determined. "I'll have to get your boots off first. So hold on."

She nodded and understanding him quite literally, she grabbed onto his shoulders to steady herself.
He grinned at her reassuringly and then dove under water. Reaching out his hand he bumped against her leg and then felt his way down until he reached her boot. Without seeing anything, he worked the knot open and then eased the boot from her foot. He jammed the boot between his knees and made quick work of the second boot. Her hands were clinging to his shoulders for support, but he didn't feel her weight. She tried to help him as much as she could and kept it off of him.

As soon as he was done, he emerged and tied the boot's laces together. He threw them around his neck so he wouldn't lose them – they didn't have spare boots with them and she might still need them – and then his fingers wandered back to her belt. He opened it and undid the button, followed by the zipper. Then he loosened her weapon holster that held her Berretta to her hip and thigh and her utility belt that held her spare ammunition and her combat knife, and just as he'd done with her boots he clamped the holster and the belt between his knees to have his hands free.
Already her pants were thoroughly soaked, too, and heavy, so Jack had to use quite some force to get them down her hips. He was aware that it forced him to step way too close to her and he felt her breath wash against his naked chest. He was now practically looking down her half-naked front even though he couldn't see what he was doing under water anyways and his fingers were brushing over her panties, when he worked her pants down and he really tried his best to stay unaffected by it, but, yeah, that was still Carter with him, so there was only so much he could actually do to ignore the fact that, essentially, he was just undressing his smokin' hot 2IC…

Suppressing a groan that was threatening to escape quite unprofessionally from his suddenly dry throat, he willed his thoughts back on track. He had a task to do, here.

Finally he got the pants down to her ankles and carefully he helped her untangle her feet. Just as he'd done with his own clothes, he didn't bother to save her ruined, holey garments and merely let them float away in the water.

Grabbing her weapons holster and her utility belt with one hand, he straightened and looked down at his 2IC, refusing his eyes to travel anywhere but her face.

"You alright?", he inquired.

"Much better.", she answered, sounding thoroughly exhausted and beaten.

Jack chanced a quick glance and saw huge, angry red spots distributed all over her pale skin, where the acid had burned into her. He imagined he wasn't looking any better.

She shivered slightly and he saw goosebumps appear over her skin, reminding him that the water temperature wasn't really welcoming a longer swim.

"Come on, let's get outta here and into some fresh clothes.", he said, before turning and heading towards the water's edge. He felt Sam grab onto his free hand lightly, hesitantly, and twisted his hand to take hers, without looking back. He led her back, clearly noticing the swollen patches on her hand. He pulled her hand out of the water and examined it with a quick glance. Angry, deep red blotches covered her usually flawless skin and Jack nearly winced in sympathy at the pain she had to feel.

They emerged from the water and although Jack didn't let go of her hand, he absolutely refrained from looking anywhere near her. He was only human, too. And he was pretty sure, seeing his beautiful 2IC half-naked, in only her underwear, and soaking wet, would do him in. In under a second.

So Jack glued his eyes to his goal – their backpacks and Teal'c kneeling next to them with the slumped form of Daniel. The Jaffa had ripped the archaeologist from his shirts, but fortunately, just like Jack, Daniel had managed to contain his injuries above his waist. Still, seeing that he had by far gotten the most thrown at him, Daniel's skin looked worst of them all.

Jack let go of Sam's hand and went for her backpack. He let her weapons holster, her belt and her shoes fall to the ground next to their backpacks and then dug through hers, until he reached their first-aid kit, before handing the backpack over to her so she could retrieve dry clothes.
Jack carefully ploughed through the kit, until he found an ointment for burns. Silently he gave it to Teal'c, who began treating their friend. Daniel groaned from time to time, telling them he was still conscious, but otherwise didn't move.
Jack uncovered another tube with ointment and after squeezing a good amount into his hand, he handed it to Sam so she could deal with her injuries. He spread the cool lotion on the abused skin on his chest and instantly felt better.

"Well, kids, I guess as soon as Danny's able to walk again, we'll have to head back to the infirmary, so that good ol' Doc Fraiser can poke needles at us.", Jack decided, sighing.

"I agree, O'Neill.", Teal'c stated solemnly.

Jack stood up and ignoring his soggy pants, he grabbed a fresh shirt from his backpack and threw it on. Water sloshed in his shoes, but he ignored it, seeing that he had no spares to exchange them. Then he threw a quick glance at his and Sam's protection vests and BDU jackets. They were all effectively ruined, but he stuffed them in his backpack nonetheless. There were probably some scientists in the SGC that would wail forever, if he didn't get them a sample back.

When he was finished and had checked on Danny once more, he asked over his shoulder: "Carter? How're you doin'?"

"Um… better?", she sounded insecure.

"How're the wounds?"

"The lotion helps."

"Good.", he said, before continuing: "So… you're dressed?"

"As much as I can…", she admitted and by her hesitant voice, he could perfectly picture her blush.

"What's that supposed to mean?", he questioned surprised.

"Um…", she began and now he imagined her fidget. "I… may have forgotten to pack a spare shirt… sorry, sir."

Jack snorted. He couldn't help it and hey, he had managed to hold back the laughter, but that was just too good! The picture-perfect soldier, the always prepared Carter who double-checked anything and constantly nagged him if he had forgotten to pack this or that, had actually forgotten to pack a spare shirt. Normally, it probably wouldn't have mattered, but of course she would pick the mission where she would desperately need it. Talk about irony.

For a moment Jack imagined her walking back through the Stargate topless and his laughter died. No fucking way in hell were those SF's getting to see what he had accidentally been lucky enough to catch a glimpse of!

He grabbed his backpack and rummaged through it. He had his spare shirt on himself, but if he was right, then he'd packed another BDU jacket…
Grinning, he fished the item out of his backpack and turned for his 2IC. She had put her spare pants, her utility belt and her boots back on, her weapon holster with her Berretta strapped back to her belt and her thigh, and her arms were crossed self-consciously in front of her still half-naked chest.
Again Jack did his hardest to keep his eyes at a non-court-martial-able place: her face.

"Here.", he said simply and handed her his jacket.

She looked at him astonished, but then a big grin appeared on her face and thanking him profusely, she slid into his jacket, zipping it up to her throat.
Jack looked down at her. His jacket was way too large for her. In fact she had to roll up the sleeves so she could actually use her hands. The jacket went down to her thighs and she probably would fit twice in the thing, but somehow, Jack found she looked utterly adorable in his clothes. And he was so not thinking about the fact that she was practically naked under it… (okay, maybe a bit)

"O'Neill!", Teal'c called out, ripping him from his thoughts. "I do not believe Daniel Jackson will be able to walk any time soon, but he certainly requires immediate medical attention. I shall carry him back to the SGC."

"Alright.", Jack agreed. "Then let's pack up and return."

He hoisted up his backpack and his damaged P90, and then shouldered Daniel's backpack. Teal'c lifted the half-unconscious Daniel over his shoulders, not even blinking an eye, when he added the man's weight to that of his backpack weighing down on his back.
Sam took hold of her things, now carrying her P90 in her hands seeing that she'd lost her protection vest, and then followed the Colonel.
Teal'c took lead, setting a fast pace towards the Stargate.

Jack looked back at Sam and grinned automatically at seeing her in his overly large jacket. The straps of her backpack pulled the crinkling garment tight over her chest and he could clearly see the name tag reading 'O'Neill' staring at him from her torso. As could – and would – everybody else, once they'd reached the SGC.
His grin grew even larger. He probably shouldn't like it that much, but seeing her wearing his clothes – with his name on it to boot – was soothing and satisfying in a very against-the-frat-regs way. One that he enjoyed way too much, but he just couldn't help himself.
God, she looked adorable!

Hurray for gooey alien traps!