"Creative people are very insecure people because they don't know whether people like them or are in awe of them. That insecurity always comes out. It makes them a better actor, I feel."

By Persis Khambatta

#04 [Handle with Care]

Even after I gotten better and returned back to school, all thanks to Kishinuma, unfortunately things back at school haven't changed which included my relationship with Mochida. As luck was on my side, Nakashima was also unable to get anywhere closer with Mochida. According to Shinohara, Nakashima was going to confess her feelings when delivering the chocolates on Valentine's Day, but she got cold feet and presented them as supplementary chocolates.

Hearing this information got me motivated to proceed with my plan to make Mochida jealous and Kishinuma was going to help me get me my man.

…

…

The first few days were simple; I would avoid having any communication with Mochida. To show, I wasn't just simply ignoring him, I would be chat with Kishinuma. Unfortunately that wasn't enough to persuade him, what's worse, the conversations with Kishinuma were always a bore. Since he never showed any interest in his education, there was almost nothing to talk about. The only time it was interesting was he did the talking, mentioning about his hobbies and work.

A week had passed and no results came out of Mochida, so I decided to take a different route, one that would kill two birds with one stone. I would assist Kishinuma with class assignments and sit next to him. Whenever Mochida would take a glance at us, I would physically lean closer to Kishinuma even to the point of pressing my "lack of" chest against his body. Mochida would quickly glance away which meant I was able to get his attention. As for Kishinuma, his body would always tremble and his face would always get red. I kindly asked him once if he was sick and needed to see the school nurse, but he refused and returned back to the last question he was on.

Another week had gone by and I was still unable to get Mochida to crack. I took into consideration that maybe Mochida didn't want to start an argument or even a fight in school. So I took it to the streets, I demanded Kishinuma to start walking me back home, using an excuse like "protection against predators." Luckily, he easily complied with my demands and walked me home. To avoid being spotted by my family and have the same incident repeat itself, I had Kishinuma drop me off a block away from my house. Of course he always persisted to take me the whole way, but my answer still remained the same. Unfortunately so was Mochida's, who was still unfazed by all this.

Yet another week passed by and White Day was literally today. A whole month had passed since I came up with this stupid plan but I still was nowhere closer than I originally was. Frustrated, I decided to go with my original plan and confront the source of my problem as well as my feelings; Mochida.

I waited until lunch break; as soon as I heard that bell go off I rushed myself towards Mochida, standing firm and upset at him. "Mochida, we have to talk," I told him.

"Uh… Sure, thing class rep. What did you want to talk about?"

"Not here, let's talk somewhere more private," I harshly responded before grabbing a hold of his wrist and dragged him out of the classroom. We eventually reached our destination on the rooftop where it was more vacant. We stood a few feet from each other.

"Care to explain?" I asked as I tapped my foot on the floor with my arms across together.

"Huh? What do you mean, Shinozaki?" Mochida tilted his head to the side, confused on what topic we were discussing.

Now, I got more upset as if he were acting dumb. So I started to raise my voice at him, "I meant about your attitude towards me! Here I am, trying for the past month– no for two years trying to get you to notice me and you still won't budge!"

"What are you talking about Shinozaki? I've always have treated you the same way like I've always been. You're the class representative and my friend. What more did you want from me?" Mochida calmly responded to my outburst. Through his tone of voice, one could tell how concerned he was for me as well as worried.

"I want you to notice my feelings Satoshi," I confessed. By using his first name, I wanted to show him how serious I was with my emotions.

Mochida stood there, slightly embarrassed at my sudden confession but he still remained silent by rubbing the back of his head. I could tell that he had difficulty coming up with a response, so I decided to repeat myself so there wouldn't be any confusion with my confession.

"I, Ayumi Shinozaki, am in love with you Satoshi Mochida."

Mochida lowered his head, "What about Yosh–," he whispered before he stopped himself mid-sentence. He brought his head back up to face me, "I really appreciate that you feel that way for me, Shinozaki…"

I felt my heart skip a beat when I heard him say that, giving myself high hopes on what he might say next.

"Unfortunately I have to respectfully deny them."

My heart sank so low, maybe even crushed by his rejection or was it my own hopes that made me feel this way.

"You must already have known of my feelings for Naomi?"

I only responded with a nod. I always known he had feelings for Nakashima but I didn't want to believe it. I hoped that I would someday sway his feelings towards me, but I was a fool to believe in such hopes.

"Funny thing is, I kind of hope for one day I could to build up the courage like you did, to confess to her," he finished his sentence with a chuckle. "Look at me talking about my love life but in all seriousness, I hope we can still be friends after this."

As much it sickened me to hear Mochida talk about her, I knew I didn't have the heart to hate him. He still cared about me even when he rejected my confession and his concerned tone in his voice made feel certain.

I nodded my head, "No, it's alright Mochida. I had a sense of feeling that I would get rejected, but I needed to get my feelings out to you," I said.

Then I raised my cheeks to pull off a fake smile, "But what matters the most, is that we're still friends and able to settle this in a civilized fashion."

Mochida wasn't convinced and asked, "Are you sure Shinozaki? We could grab a drink and talk about it."

'How nice of him,' I thought to myself but at the moment I didn't need his sympathy. I was on the verge of crying and I didn't want him to see me in that state. Instead I shook my head at him and said, "I'm quite sure Mochida. Besides shouldn't you be confessing you love to Nakashima?"

A slight flush of embarrassment came across his face, "I just can't confess to her. I don't even know if she likes me back."

"Take my advice from my book and confess to her, you won't know until you tried, right?"

"I guess you're right Shinozaki," he said with a slight smile.

"Of course I'm right. I am the class representative for a reason," I flaunted before I approached behind Mochida and gave him a shove. "Now go get her, before I get upset and send Shinohara after you."

Before Mochida could leave, he gave me a smile, one that told a simple 'thank-you.' Once he was out of sight, I turned towards the wall to lean my back against it. I gave myself a moment to let my emotions flow out of me as I sat down and pulled my knees close to my face.

Then I heard the door slam open and a figure that called out my name, so I lifted my head up to see my visitor. It was no other than Kishinuma.

"Shinozaki, are you alright?" He asked as he slowly approached towards me, as if he were cautious to know if I wanted him here.

Quickly, I rubbed my tears out of my eyes and responded to Kishinuma, "Yeah, everything is fine. I just needed some time to relax from all the schoolwork." I lied to him but I didn't want him to be meddling with my problems.

Kishinuma, instead of taking my word and leaving me be, he still approached me even to the point of taking a knee to be at the same height level as me. I took a glance at him only to see him look deeply in my eyes.

"I know you're not, Shinozaki," he said to me. A few simple words were enough to break me as I swung my arms around his neck and continued to cry. As I cried, I would wipe my tears on his uniform and he would pat the back of my head, as to tell me to let it all out.

Once I was no longer able to bawl out any more tears, Kishinuma sat down next to me. "Do you want to talk about it? You don't have to if you don't want to tell me. I respect your personal space."

I couldn't understand it myself, but I somehow felt I could tell Kishinuma everything, so I shook my head and replied, "I confessed to Mochida but only to get rejected."

Kishinuma eyes grew wide in shock but he let himself relax before he spoke, "I'm sorry to hear that."

"It's okay Kishinuma. I already knew things would turn out like this, I just wasn't emotionally prepared is all."

Kishinuma could only look at me with a painful look on his face, like he was unsure what to say next. I wouldn't blame him, words weren't his forte. Suddenly his facial expression changed into a cheerful one, like he had an idea.

"That reminds me, earlier I was looking for you because I had something to give you," he said as he reached for his school bag and searched inside the bag,

"Something for me?"

"Yeah since, you know, you got me something for Valentine's Day, so I thought I would repay you by getting you something for White Day."

I replayed the scene in my head, remembering the chocolates I gave him which were intentionally for Mochida. I also recalled his 'criticism' on them.

"But you said they were awful!" I exclaimed at him with a bit of embarrassment flushed across my face.

"Don't worry they still are," he joked.

So I pouted, "Let me guess, you got me some chocolates to rub it in my face."

"No even better," he said with a smile before revealing the gift out of his school bag.

"I got you this," he revealed a medium sized crystal ball and handed it to me.

I was mesmerized by the gift; it was a real crystal ball unlike those plastic counterparts. The ball was so clear and reflective that I could see myself on the ball. I looked back at him.

"I knew you have a thing for the occult, so I thought I would get you something like this. Every occult fan needs their own crystal ball, am I right?"

"Kishinuma, I'm quite thankful for the gift but it isn't necessary," I said as I tried to hand it back to him only to have pushed back to me.

"Just consider it a gift for all the birthdays I've forgotten to give you something."

I hesitated but I took into consideration of all the hard work and money he had to do to give me this gift. "Sure thing and thank you Kishinuma," I said with a heartfelt smile.

Kishinuma gave me a smile in return and asked, "Feeling better now Shinozaki?"

"Yeah and thanks."

"Now it's my turn to take an example from you," he started.

Huh?

"Shinozaki, I-I…" He paused to gulp down his embarrassment and continued. "Shinozaki, I love you."

Eh?!

…

…

It only took three simple words, three simple words to turn my world upside down. Three simple words that could change everything between him and I. Three simple words that could simply change everything in a heartbeat.

A/N: Hey you fellow readers, how's it hanging? I apologize that this chapter took longer to upload but in my defense, I did say the progress was going to be slower. So Yoshiki confessed, that's a thing. I wonder how Ayumi will respond to all this.

So did everyone get to see and enjoy E3? I know I did but as E3 came to an end, a thought came to me and I wondered to myself if there was any news about localizing Blood Drive. It was announced in May that Blood Drive will come and with a physical copy on Oct. 13th. So mark your calendars because it going to be the day the corpses run wild! (is it ironic that it falls on the month of Halloween?)

Speaking of Holidays, I have a special treat coming in a few days and I hope you guys will enjoy it.

Also, I spotted that you guys liked "The Not So Jealous Ayumi." It's been favorited and followed even when it was just a one-shot story. But I considered, if you really wish for me to continue it, just leave a comment on that story or just pm your thoughts on it.

Other than that, I hope you guys enjoy this chapter and your fourth of July, or for all you non-Americans, celebrate your awesomeness because you deserve it!