This is it. The final chapter. Wah! It's all over! criesThis story has been apart of me for over two years now. I've been writing it since my 7th grade year...I'm now half way through my 9th grade year, it's been so long...Okay...instead of reminiscing I'll just get on with it.
Warning!
Does NOT end that happy! I tried not to make it too sad but it just is...Some OOC too...
Also know that this chapter is a song-fic to the song "P5HNG ME AWY" (Pushing Me Away) by Linkin Park (Reanimation version if you can't tell)
Stuffy about the sequel is at the end of this chapter.
Without further ado...I bring you...The final chapter of...
Missing...But Am I Missed?
By: Ryoko Lover 4-ever
For the last time for this story...I do not own Medabots. (Nor the song!)
"I guess...this is goodbye."
It feels...so unreal...Like it happened long ago...
"Flight 567 to Iceland now boarding..." said a voice, suddenly, over the intercom (A/N: Sound familiar?) Many people stood up and headed to the ticket counter to board the flight, Alex...or should I say Erika who was sitting in a corner far from the counter woke from her thoughts by the announcement.
"Hm?" she looked around half dazed when Brass spoke.
"Ms. Erika?" slightly shaking the girl "You'd better hurry or we'll miss the flight. Belmont is already in line." Erika looked over to the counter and sure enough there was Belmont holding the line for her.
Everything had happened so fast...Wasn't she doing just this 10 years ago? Boarding a flight to away from her problems...
But...it's different this time...I was wrong last time...I never should have left in the first place...but...but this time is different....I wasn't hated last time...
Flashback
The whole mess with Akuma was over. He was dead and the police were investigating to be positive. The explosion had been a big uproar through out the city...many were questioning why he was aloud to stay here (He was a runaway criminal)
Ikki and "Alex" (A/N: Who will now be referred to as Erika) had been checked into the hospital for minor scratches and bruises, a broken wrist on Ikki's part.
Erika had been in her room a few hours when she finally decided to pay Ikki a visit to make sure he was okay and to thank him for saving her. She knew everyone was at the hospital for she had received visits from Brass and Henry. She slowly walked down the hall to Ikki's room trying to think of what to say. She knew he would probably be mad at her...
She knocked on his door and slowly entered. Sure enough everyone was there standing around Ikki's bed. Everything seemed to quite down when Alex entered. Everyone was staring at her and some giving her glares. Erika gave a small smile back, slightly nervous. She looked to Ikki and caught his eyes. There was nothing there but her own mistakes.
When I look into your eyes
There's nothing there to see
Nothing but my own mistakes
Staring back at me
Slightly surprised, Erika took a step back, her smile fading. Henry saw that they wanted to talk and ushered everyone out of the room.
Finally breaking eye contact, Erika turned to the window. "How are you feeling?" she asked timidly.
"Just fine." stated Ikki almost menacingly.
"I see..." came her reply
After a short time of silence Ikki broke it with a question. "How did you expect to keep your real identity from me? And everyone else for that matter?"
I've lied to you...
Erika was slightly taken back but she knew this was coming.
"I'm not sure." she whispered "I guess, I thought I could."
They both sat in awkward silence. Erika sensed that Ikki wanted a better answer.
"I don't maybe...I thought you knew." she took a deep breath. "I was just playing myself all along. I pretended that we were still little kids. You knew me and I knew you. But in the end...I was wrong."
Erika was still staring out the window. She could feel that Ikki was looking directly at her.
"Why..." started Ikki. "Why did you leave in the first place? We all cared for you, and many others too. You, really, had no reason to runaway. I know...we know, that you were jealous of Karin but does that really give you the right to leave? We were teenagers, we go through fazes, that was just a faze, it didn't last forever. There are a lot harder things in life than being depressed over a guy you like. If you can't face the little things...how can you ever face the bigger things?"
Erika took a sharp intake of breath. Ikki was being really poetic but he was also right. All the time she spent away from Japan, she knew what she did was wrong. Running away wasn't the answer. But it was too late to take it back. She had felt that if she didn't get away for a while that she might have done something even more drastic.
She slowly smiled a half-hearted smile. She took a step away from the window and turned to face Ikki who was still staring at her. Though this time, it was more of a pleading answer look not the hateful look she had gotten earlier. Her smile slightly turned into a smirk. She might as well tell him...because after this she would probably never see him again, no matter how much she hated to be away.
For the sake of being with you...Ikki...
This is the last smile
That I'll fake for the sake of being with you...
"All the time I was in either Iceland or America, basically anywhere but here, home, I thought the same things." she said slowly. "Why did I leave? That's not a good enough reason. I said to myself everyday. I came up with the answer that I was mistaken. There wasn't a good enough reason...I didn't have the right to leave and make my friends and family sad and confused. But I can't take that back...I can't just go back in time and stop myself from doing it. It's too late for that.
"There were times when I was sad that I had left and even a few times when I was happy. I had grown stronger and maybe even more independent because of it. But...I guess in the end...the sadness was stronger. That's why I came back here. Maybe...I was trying to pretend that nothing had happened. That I had never left, that I had always been here. Not only was I lying to you...but also to myself. I realize now that that can't happen. But I really can't give you an answer, other than that one, as to why I left. Maybe...I'm just weak."
Ikki just sat there, also a little surprised at how poetic she was being.
"But..." he started when she cut him off.
"You're right...it didn't last forever. This didn't last forever." she said again slowly, referring to the past couple of months. She lowered her head and stared at the ground. "Everything has to end. I found that out the hard way. I believe you did also."
Everything falls apart, even the people who never frown eventually break down
Everything has to end, you'll soon find, we're outta time, left to watch it all unwind
(For sake of being with you)
Everything falls apart, even the people who never frown eventually break down
Erika's words played in Ikki's mind. I can't take that back...I was trying to pretend that nothing had happened...I'm just weak...This didn't last forever...He slowly realized that her words reflected him as well. In the years she was gone...he had gone back and forth on the blame. On himself and her. That's what he was doing right now. Blaming her for leaving and for coming back without telling anyone. But he remembered years ago...thinking the same things as her.
He couldn't take back flirting with Karin. I can't take that back...
He had tried to pretend that she had never been there in the first place. I was trying to pretend that nothing had happened...
He felt he was weak for doing just that and not being able to stop her. I'm just weak...
No matter how much he wished...It didn't last forever. This didn't last forever...
He stared at her sadly. Almost pityingly...He noticed that she had begun to cry.
"I never knew..."
The sacrifice is never knowing
Erika looked up, still crying. She looked him over. He seemed sincere enough. But just because she hadn't been with him the past ten years didn't mean she didn't know what he was like. He never really understood anything at first. This time was probably no different.
"No...No Ikki. I really don't think you understand. You may have never known but I still don't think you've completely grasped it. You don't see it all...all you see is how it pertains to you...and only you."
She knew her time with him was growing to a close. She wiped her eyes, clearing them of tears. She was depressed...yet slightly relieved. She wanted to get away from him...she really didn't want to stay any longer but a part of her still didn't want to leave. She felt exactly like the time she was leaving all those years ago. Last time turned out to be a mistake. She didn't want to make the same mistake again.
Why I stayed with you
Just push away
No matter what you see
You're still so blind to me
"I can't go on any longer Ikki. It's your decision...Do you want me to stay or not? I really have nothing left here in Japan. I thought I did...I guess that's another thing I was wrong about." She took a deep breath trying to not cry again.
Ikki had absorbed everything she had said before. He didn't understand? Like hell he didn't understand!
"Erika..." he said slowly, getting mad. "You say that I don't understand. If anything...I believe it's you that doesn't understand!" He had tried being nice but he suddenly remembered all the way back to where she had first entered the room. He was mad at her, angry at her...and he still was. He felt like he could never forgive her...though not entirely sure why. He returned his glare back at her.
"I really don't care what you do anymore. I'm not sure why I even bothered in the first place. You were right about one thing though...There is nothing left for you here in Japan. Go somewhere else for all I care...I won't chase after you." he said trying not to shout. Even though he was saying this...He really didn't believe it. He really did care. He couldn't help but push her away.
Erika was slightly taken aback by Ikki's words. She knew this would probably happen but he just couldn't see the truth.
"Fine. I'll leave. If you don't care...then I don't care either. I've spent enough of my life trying to chase after you." She didn't mean it either.
I've tried
Like you
To do everything you wanted to
This is the last time
I'll take the blame for the sake of being with you...
Erika slowly made her way to the door...still holding back on the tears. She began to open the door when she stopped and faced Ikki with tears in her eyes...one last time.
"All of this time you were right. It was all my fault. I left, I caused you all pain. I didn't have the right to leave. I don't have a reason. I couldn't face my problems. I was mistaken. I was too late. I was pretending nothing had happened. It can't happen like that. I'm weak. It didn't last forever...I learned the hard way. I don't understand. I was hiding in a lie all this time. It's my fault. I'm sorry. You're right about everything...I don't want to stay."
"I guess...this is goodbye."
With that she spun around, opened the door, and walked out. Ikki was slightly dazed. What had he done? She was gone. He stared at the door almost hoping she would come back. They were out of time...everything between them had ended.
Everything falls apart, even the people who never frown eventually break down
The sacrifice of hiding in a lie...
Everything has to end, you'll soon find, we're outta time, left to watch it all unwind
When Erika got out of the room and into the hallway she noticed that everyone was still there. Again, most of them were glaring at her. She took a deep breath and started walking down the corridor with her head down. She didn't want to make eye contact. She passed Samantha, Spyke, Sloan, Karin, Koji, Dr. Aki, Rintaro, Henry, and all their medabots.
When she passed a little ways from the last person, she stopped. They weren't in the room when she was explaining everything...They didn't know either.
The sacrifice is never knowing
This might be the last time she saw them too.
Erika lifted up her head and look straight ahead, not bothering to turn around. She tried being brave.
"Ikki can tell you what happened. I don't feel like explaining it again but...I'll tell you something he doesn't know." she paused. She could still feel them staring at her. "I'm sorry for all the mess I've caused. I played you and myself but I won't be here to cause anymore trouble or pain. I've decided to go back to Iceland and accept Belmont's proposal to get married."
She paused again and heard a slight gasp from behind her.
"I know you guys probably hate me a lot right now but..." Erika choked, trying to hold her tears in. "I would really appreciate it if you guys came to the wedding." She slightly smiled. "We were once friends, I would hope we still could be."
"You're wrong, Erika." came a reply from Karin, she smiled. "We always have been."
Erika was slightly stunned. What Ikki had said to her just moments before replayed in her head. It's you that doesn't understand!
Why I stayed with you
Just push away
No matter what you see
You're still so blind to me
Erika was feeling over emotional at the moment. She had tried being strong all this time but her façade was slowly disappearing. She had to get away.
"W-well...a-anyways" she stumbled "I've got to go catch a flight to Iceland. I hope to see you at the wedding." With that she ran away crying, still never facing them.
End Flashback
Erika had run outside and ran to the park. She had already been checked out of the hospital and couldn't stand to be there a moment longer. She was crying on a bench when Brass had caught up with her. They sat there for a few minutes and then headed back to Erika's house. Erika called Belmont and told him that she was coming back to Iceland. To her surprise he was already in Japan to see how she was doing.
Erika had been sitting in her room thinking over what had just happened while waiting for Belmont to come.
I had to tell them...I could feel they didn't want me to leave but I have nothing left here. She was glad she didn't make eye contact with them. It might have been harder if she had. Telling you all...was my only chance.
Reverse physiology's failing miserably
It's so hard to be, left all alone
Telling you is the only chance for me
There's nothing left but, to turn and face you
(Back at the airport) Erika slowly looked at Brass again. Brass had insisted that she would go with Erika to Iceland. And they were about to board. Brass noted that Erika's eyes held a blank stare, then slowly a little hope was put in them. Erika gave a small to Brass. Brass thought this was a bad idea to leave, but thought it might be better for Erika. She said she would go up the counter with Belmont. Erika nodded an okay.
Erika looked back to the counter and slowly stood up, still smiling. When she stood up, a file that was on her lap fell off, spewing all the papers inside.
Erika looked at the photos that had fallen out. Staring at them for a few moments before slowly bending down to pick them up.
They were photos from the time she spent in Japan. All the way back to Koji's party. She had gone around taking pictures of everyone and everything, being pretty blunt about it. Erika's smile grew. She had been so happy to be back, she slightly giggled at the photos. She had been right in people's faces when they least expected it. They probably thought she was taking random photos but she was really only taking photos of her old friends.
She slowly scooped them up one by one, taking the time to reminiscent about the past few months when she got to Ikki's party photo. She had been talking to him when she pulled the camera up and click. He had a dazed/surprised look because of the flash.
Erika's smile slowly turned into a frown. She remembered the look he had given her back at the hospital. It had been full of hate. He probably didn't hate her but it sure seemed that way.
When I look into your eyes, there's nothing there to see
Nothing but my own mistakes staring back at me
Erika stood back up again and put the pictures away. She looked back to the counter to see Brass and Belmont near the front. She picked up her things and made her way to them. When she got over there, she handed the person at the ticket counter her ticket and boarded the plane with Brass and Belmont behind her. When they got settled on the plane Belmont asked how she was doing. Erika gave him a reassuring smile and said she was doing fine.
She was doing fine. She felt relieved that they were leaving Japan. Sure she was slightly depressed but she felt she would be home when they got back to Iceland. She hadn't been there in a few years after all.
But before the plane took off, she again asking the question if this was the right thing to do. Should she leave a second time? She was feeling the same way she did back at the hospital. She didn't want to make the same mistake again. But was she?
Asking why...
I can't be... she thought. I feel happy that I'm going back to Iceland, that I'm going to get married. But...Why do I still feel like I'm doing something wrong?
Maybe everyone was right, maybe it was her who didn't understand. Maybe she was the one who never knew.
No...I won't give in to depressing thoughts again. Maybe that's true but I'm not turning back now. she thought, determined not to get depressed over this anymore. It was in the past, the past can't be changed. But she would still be really happy if they came to her wedding, and if they still held grudges over this whole mess, then that was their problem.
The sacrifice of hiding in a lie...
The sacrifice is never knowing
The plane finally landed. Erika was ecstatic to be back in Iceland. She felt like this was her home. She took a deep breath and gave a smile to Belmont and Brass. She couldn't wait to get back to his house, or soon the be, their house. She had been really happy that he still wanted to be together.
Belmont and Brass watched her walk away happily. The gave each other an unsure look. They weren't entirely sure that this had been a good idea. Erika was just hiding her true feelings but if she didn't want to admit it, then they wouldn't pressure her into saying them.
They vaguely wondered how the others back in Japan were doing and how they were coping when they started after Erika.
Why I stayed with you
Just push away
No matter what you see
You're still so blind to me
Erika sat down at her desk at her workplace. It had been about a week since she had arrived in Iceland. She applied for a job at the local newspaper and was insistently hired. She had been doing news pieces for the past week but finally found time to sit down and work on her feature story.
It was going to be about her adventures these past ten years. She vowed after this that she would never bring it up again. She began with her running away to living in Iceland. To moving to America and reporting on the World Robattle Championship that changed the world. To going back to Japan and reuniting with her friends...even though they never knew who she really was. From the final battle with Akuma to now in the present time. All in all the story was over 7 pages long. Maybe I should turn this into a book...she thought.
In the last few paragraphs she gave her own opinion of what happened. She said that the one question that plagued her all this time, all ten years was this...
Why I stayed with you
Just push away
No matter what you see
You're still so blind to me
"I was missing...but was I missed?"
End
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That's all she wrote folks! I hope you've enjoyed Missing...But Am I Missed?. (Now you know the reference to the last sentence) (The 7 page thing also refers to how many chapters there are in this story...hehe. It's not funny is it?) It's been great! I'll really miss this story but I'm super glad it's over. (It's been WAY too long...Over two years!) I really hope this chapter wasn't too depressing for you. (Or too long/short) I'll try to make the sequel funnier!
Speaking of the sequel...Since you're all desperate to know (yeah right) The sequel should come out this summer...hopefully around Aug. I know that seems a long time from now but that's the only time I'll have time to write. I'm doing it this way so my style doesn't change throughout the story again...and so it doesn't take a super long time to finish.
I'm not too sure on the title yet for the sequel but here's a slight summary and preview! Yay! (Currently titled "Goodbye Doesn't Mean Forever"...Yes, it refers to this chapter. I'm trying really hard to connect things...can't you tell?)
Summary
It's been a few months since Erika left Japan again. The wedding between her and Belmont is drawing ever closer. Will Ikki, or even Erika, realize their mistakes and forgive each other before it's too late?
Preview (exert)
The church was suddenly silent after the sudden noise. All heads turned towards the back of the church where the noise came from.
It was Ikki. He was covered in dirt and was panting, trying to catch his breath from all the running he had done.
After the initial shock of the church, everyone started whispering. Erika stared at him from the alter, also surprised.
"Yo, Ikki!" shouted Rintaro from a few rows up. Relieved to see him. "Where've ya been?"
Ikki stood up and slowly walked up the isle.
"Where have I been? I'll tell you where I've been!" he shouted sarcastically. "I hitchhiked my way through 5 countries to get here!" He glared at Metabee who had stolen his wallet when he left. "Falling, tripping, drowning...almost being mauled by crazy fan girls! I was almost run over by a plane, a car, a boat, and even a cow!" he took a deep breath trying to suppress his rage. He looked up at Erika, who was still looking at him, and gave her a smile. "But it was all worth it to get here on time. It was all for you, Erika."
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Bwuhaha! I'm not telling what happens! You'll just have to read it when it comes out!
Until then...
Bye-bye!
"Missing...But Am I Missed?"
December 10, 2002 - January 24, 2005
We will miss you! TT