To This Moment
By Bre (dust2dust34)
Disclaimer: I don't own anything related to Arrow.
Rating: Explicit
Author's Notes: What I think might happen in Nanda Parbat. This is total Olicity service, ya'll, from Oliver's POV.
Summary: "Everything I did, everything that happened has led me right here. To this moment."
"Everything I did, everything that happened has led me right here. To this moment."
Oliver stared up at her, trying to make her understand. What it meant, what it had all meant the entire time. Where this had always been going.
She inhaled slowly, tears flooding her eyes before she quickly blinked them away, offering him a small smile.
She wasn't understanding. Of course she wasn't understanding.
She came here as a friend. To be a shoulder to lean on. Because he spent the last several months terrified to do anything more with her. She didn't understand because he hadn't.
"Oliver," she whispered, shaking her head minutely before grabbing the red velvet ottoman and tugging it closer so she could sit before him.
Oliver watched her, watched her sit down, watched her bite her bottom lip, before she leaned towards him, grabbing one of his hands, cradling it between hers. She didn't look up at him, her eyes trained on where she held him.
He watched one red fingernail trace a scar on his thumb.
"Oliver, I don't know what's going to happen tomorrow," she said, her wavering, but strong. So strong. She was always the strong one, the one who knew what she wanted, the one who went for it and didn't look back. And he'd run from that, he'd been running from it, while trying to stay in the natural light she gave off like a beacon. He'd been running away from and towards her at the same time, and he was so damn tired of the running.
He wanted to stand still. He wanted to just… be.
With her.
Her words from the jet had been on constant repeat in his head since the second she'd said them to him:
"I love you, Oliver Queen. I love you more than I've loved anything or anyone in my entire life, and if you think for one second that you're doing this alone, you are so, so very wrong. So yeah, I'm getting on this stupid plane and you aren't going to do a single thing to stop me."
Through traveling to the compound, through the meeting with Ra's, through the… explanation, of the ceremony, of what would happen… through it all…
He'd only been able to hear Felicity's words.
He didn't want to think about tomorrow.
"Felicity," he croaked, interrupting her, squeezing her hand and her eyes flew to his. For a heavy moment, all he could do was stare at her - at the flickering candles reflecting in her glasses, the tears drying on her lashes, her trembling lip, her… everything.
His Felicity.
He squeezed her hand again, meeting her eyes. "This moment. I meant… this moment."
Her eyes widened. "What?"
"Felicity, I love you. I have loved you, and I've been… running from you, for so long, because I didn't think I could… be me, without hurting you. And I couldn't bear the thought of that, of you getting caught in the… but now… now it's too late, and…" Oliver sighed, his eyes snapping shut as he tried to get the words out but none of them felt like they were enough. How could he know with such certainty in his heart - in his soul - that this was the woman for him, that he loved her and her love only made everything better?
This was the most important moment of his life and he couldn't even talk.
A hot blush filtered up his chest and neck, making his cheeks hot as Oliver glanced down at their hands.
He didn't know who was trembling more.
"Oliver," Felicity said, tugging on his hands, and he looked up at her again. A tentative smile touched her lips as she said, "Are you… sure?"
He let out a breathy chuckle of incredulity at that question. "Felicity-"
She closed her eyes, shaking her head at herself before looking at him again. "I meant… I'm pretty sure you're sure, but what I was… trying to say was… I mean, I meant something, obviously, but I can't…"
Oliver chuckled, sucking his bottom lip between her teeth. "I think I know what you meant."
She smiled at him.
He took both her hands in his, cradling them and he thought he saw her shiver. He ran his thumbs over her knuckles before he squeezed them tightly.
"Is this… do you want-" he started and she shot him a look.
"You have said a lot of dumb things in your life, Oliver, but if you finish that question, it will take the cake. All the cake." He grinned, taking a shaky breath, and he felt the hot sting of tears in his eyes as the gravity of what was happening right then hit him. She paused. "And what I'm about to say doesn't count, because this… Oliver, if this is the last..."
"Don't," he said softly, moving to cup her face. She leaned into his touch, sighing when his hand slipped down so he could run his thumb over her lips. Her breath hitched and his fingers started trembling as he took a deep breath.
"I'm sure," she whispered. "Are you sure?"
Oliver answered by slowly removing her glasses.
Her eyes followed his movements, watching him fold them and place them on the table next to the chair before she looked up at him.
"You are so beautiful," he whispered, feeling a sharp stab in his chest when she blushed, smiling shyly.
Neither moved.
The brevity of the moment wasn't lost on either of them. It was now or never. It had been building up to this moment, this precious moment when everything was about to come to a head, when everything he had thought he'd known was about to shatter into a billion pieces… except one thing.
Her.
Everything else was falling into a place he could never have possibly dreamed, but throughout all of it, one thing remained steady: her.
They reached for each other at the same time.
Oliver tugged her towards him as she launched herself into his arms, their lips finding each other without hesitation. Oliver groaned, pulling her closer as she wrapped her arms around his neck. She was in his lap without preamble, her thighs wrapping around his hips as he held her, one arm bounding across her back, yanking her in as close as he could get her while the other snaked up into her hair, cupping the back of her head, angling her as he took control of the kiss.
Elation danced across his nerves as he gripped her tighter, molding her to his chest.
She made the sweetest little sound in the back of her throat, and she shivered under his touch again, and the kiss growing in ferocity.
Months.
Months.
How long had he been dreaming about this moment, wanting it so badly he could taste it, but denying himself all the same? Watching her with Palmer, watching her move on, knowing it was exactly what she was supposed to do because she deserved so much better, knowing he had made the right choice… but still wanting her so bad he felt like someone was skinning him alive every second he was around her without being able to touch her, to taste her, to have her…
With a ragged gasp for air, Oliver broke the kiss, rasping her name against her lips and she whispered his in return, a beautiful breathless litany that left his chest feeling way too full. They were both shaking, against each other, for each other, and it was almost too much, but at the same time it wasn't enough.
Felicity pulled him back to her, her lips finding his again as she sank further into his lap. Oliver moaned, his hips jerking up to meet her, thrusting the quickly growing hardness in his pants against her warm center. She mewled, her grip on his face tightening as she ground down against him and he groaned in response, the whip of pleasure hitting him so swiftly he nearly came right there.
It had been so long since he'd been with anyone, and for so long none of that had mattered because he had been waiting for her. And he had been prepared to wait, he would have waited until the end of time for this moment. He would have been fine living his life with just one single taste, knowing that he had gotten something, that he had had her in his life for a moment…
Regret sliced through his chest with a rusty blade and he pulled back with a gasp, squeezing his eyes shut as he whispered, "I'm so sorry, Felicity."
Felicity froze, her heartbeat racing against his chest, her entire body throbbing against his. He opened his eyes as she slowly released her grip on him, pulling even further away than that before he realized what his words sounded like.
"No," he said. "Not this, never this."
His heart was thrumming so fast and hard in his chest he felt like he was about to burst. His hands shook as he slowly unwound his arms, keeping his fingers on her with every move as he followed the lines of her body. He swallowed, his breathing still ragged, his hands moving down her sides before moving back up, wrapping around her again where he pulled her down until their foreheads were touching.
"I wanted…" he started, his voice cracking. "I wanted this, us…"
"Shh," Felicity whispered, shaking her head. Her hands roved all across his face, her fingers tracing his brow, his cheek, his ear. Her nails scraped the sensitive skin of his neck and he shivered. "Kiss me, Oliver. Just kiss me." She pressed her lips to his and he inhaled quickly - he knew in the depth of his soul that he would never get tired of this, he would never get enough of this.
"Just love me," she breathed, pressing her lips to his again as her hands slid down his neck and to his shoulders, moving to the buttons of his shirt. He kept stock still, kissing her softly, gently, as her fingers deftly undid the buttons. She pressed it aside, her fingers grazing his chest before she moved to push it off.
She broke away again, her breathing harsh and uneven, her eyes glazed with desire, need and love as she looked at him. She licked her lips, making Oliver's heart trip over itself, his hands clenching her closer, before she whispered, "Make love to me, Oliver."
Time was suspended for that quick second as her words washed over him. Her friendship, her trust, her loyalty, her love… it washed over him and with a choked sound Oliver yanked her back against him, hiking her closer as their lips crashed together.
She pressed his shirt down his arms as much as she could before he pulled back, letting go of her long enough to whip the shirt off. He forgot his sleeves were still buttoned but he barely felt them when he ripped the buttons from the seams as Felicity slid her jacket off.
Oliver's fingers found the hem of her shirt, pushing up underneath it, touching her heated skin.
God, but he would never get enough of this woman, he had known it since before he knew what she tasted like, before the first time he'd kissed her. It was in the small touches, the grazes, grasping her hand for a split second, enough to get him by…
He was greedy for the feel of her, for her touch, and his hands slid up under her shirt, his palms flush to her skin and she moaned, arching her back into him, her head falling back, her hair cascading over her shoulders. Oliver kept his eyes on her face as his hands slid up her sides, dancing over her ribs, gliding over her bra, pulling her closer so he could press his lips to her pulse point. She wound her arms around his neck, cradling him as he pressed feather light kisses to her skin, his tongue darting out for a taste.
When she let out a guttural gasp when he hit a certain spot, Oliver sucked on the tender skin before nipping at it.
"Oh god," she whispered. He smirked before she said, "Oliver Queen is giving me a hickey."
Oliver paused, wondering if he'd heard that right, before he laughed.
It felt like someone was ripping open the black stitches holding his soul together and was letting a rush of sunlight into him - it was like he was being purified, like all the darkness he'd been living in for so long was being banished.
Because of her.
She stiffened in his arms, realizing what she'd said, and she groaned, covering her eyes.
"I'm ruining the moment, aren't I?" she asked and Oliver shook his head, pulling her closer.
She was never close enough, he needed her closer.
"No," Oliver said. "No, you're making it perfect." She let out a short laugh but it didn't get far before Oliver pressed his lips back to hers. "Perfect," he mumbled against her lips.
"No, what would be perfect," she breathed, "Would be if I had not worn pants."
Oliver chuckled again and she smiled, kissing him lightly before she climbed off his lap, using his shoulders as a brace. He watched her with hooded eyes as she licked her lips, staring down at him. She toed her shoes off, her fingers going to the button of her jeans.
"Let me," he said as he stood, his hands already reaching for the hem of her shirt. He pushed it up and she raised her arms, leaving her in nothing but a lacy black bra.
Oliver's mouth went dry, and pants forgotten, he wrapped his arms around her waist and leaned down, pressing a chaste kiss to the center of her chest.
She sighed, carding her fingers through his hair gently as he pressed another, and another, moving down until he reached on the lacy cups. Her breathing increased, her nails starting to dig into his scalp as he pressed a kiss to the edge, and then over the lacy hill before his lips found her hard nipple jutting out for attention.
"Oliver," she hissed as his tongue swiped across it and the sound of his name on her lips was his undoing.
Oliver leaned down and grabbed her thigh as he wrapped his arm around her back and he hiked her up into his arms, his lips finding hers. He swallowed her surprised gasp as she wrapped her arms around his neck, holding on.
The bed was right there and he spun, backing up until his knees hit the mattress. Oliver slid his hand down until he was palming her ass and he lifted her so her legs were anchored on his hips as he sat down, pulling her down with him. His hands slid over her backside, down her thighs and back up, need humming through his veins as he cupped her ass in a tight grip, kneading her cheeks as he pulled her hips against his.
Felicity arched her back, the air between them vibrating with need as her hips started a gentle rocking motion, rubbing herself against him as she rode him, and he moaned her name.
Oliver watched her with dark eyes, arousal making the room fade away until there was nothing but her as she reached back and unhooked her bra. His hands immediately slid up her back, making her shudder when he hit a sensitive spot, his fingers slipping through the straps and sliding it down her arms, his eyes latched on her rapidly rising chest.
Her breasts were swaying in time with her hips, pale and glowing in the candlelight. Her hard nipples were a rich dusky pink, a beautiful contrast, and he reached up, cupping them.
Felicity moaned, biting her lip, her hands moving to cover his where she pressed them against her harder. His eyes flew to her flushed face, her pupils blown, her lips swollen from his kisses, her face covered in tiny abrasions from his beard. Her hair was in wild tangles around her shoulders, framing her like a halo as she leaned into his hands.
"Felicity," he whispered, wanting to take his damn sweet time, but also wanting to take her as hard and fast as he could. She answered for him by slipping her hands down his arms, forcing him to drop his hands to her hips as she splayed her fingers across his chest.
Her eyes drifted down to his chest, following the path her fingers took as she circled his Bratva tattoo gently, before she touched the curved scar right above it.
He rubbed tiny circles over her hipbones, his hips slowly rotating underneath hers as she moved against him, and he forced himself to stay still as her hands ran over every scar - her eyes flickered to his when she reached the bullet hole from his mother, the one that had forced him to seek her out - and she froze when her nails scraped over the scar where Ra's had driven his sword into him.
"Is this…" she asked, her trembling finger following the line that was left, and Oliver covered her hand with his.
"Hey," he said softly. "Felicity."
Her eyes flew to his. When he saw the light sheen of tears, he felt like someone had scooped his heart right out of his chest.
Oliver sat up, wrapping his arms around her, his hand moving to cup her cheek as his lips sought hers.
The kiss was searing, burning straight into his soul. Her nails dug into his muscles, and she kissed him harder, and he felt every inch of love, anger, lust, sorrow, pain she was pouring into the kiss filling him up.
Pulling her down with him, Oliver rolled over so she was underneath him, returning the kiss with fervor, pressing her further into the mattress. She let out a low keen, pulling her legs up higher to cradle him between her thighs and Oliver thrust his hips, making her gasp. Oliver pushed up onto his arms so he could watch her, watch her face flush with pleasure, her breasts swaying with their thrusts.
He had never seen anything more beautiful.
"Pants," she mumbled, licking her lips and the sight had violent need flaring to life in his chest. The urge to take her, make her his, mark her as his, nearly overwhelmed him. Felicity slipped her hands down his chest and found his pants, unbuttoning them with alarming efficiency.
Oliver sat up, his fingers finding her pants. He had them undone and he was yanking them down her hips as she lifted to help him. His fingers slipped under the band of her panties and he pulled them down swiftly, leaving her bare to his gaze and he paused.
His eyes slid across every inch of skin, from her lush thighs, to her narrow waist, her pert breasts begging for attention and back down over the gentle slope of her stomach to the glistening patch of hair covering her sex.
Felicity raised her hands towards him, silently telling him to join her, but instead he captured one, his eyes still on her beautiful body as he pressed her fingers to his lips. His eyes slowly moved back up her body to see hers dark with need and love, a volatile combination on her as he whispered, "You are beautiful, Felicity."
A ghost of a smile slipped over her lips as she said, "So are you." She gripped his hand in hers, pulling him towards her as she said, "Now lose the pants and get over here."
Oliver let out a huff of laughter and pushed off the bed, shoving his jeans and boxers down, his hard cock bouncing free, the head already slick with arousal. Felicity pushed herself up on her elbows, bending one of her legs in a way that was pure seduction as she watched at him. She bit her lip when he paused, letting her have her fill before she looked up at him through her eyelashes.
He groaned her name, climbing back on the bed in the blink of any eye, sliding his hands over her legs. He hooked her knees, pressing them up as he settled over her and she opened herself to him completely, wrapping her arms and legs around him as his cock slid through her soaking center, slipping through her arousal.
For him.
All for him.
Oliver groaned, thrusting against her shallowly.
"Please," she whispered, wrapping her legs higher around his waist, opening herself for him more and he closed his eyes at the heat coming from her. When his cock slid over her clit, her hips jerked against him and made a tight fist in the comforter by her head. "Oliver…"
Reaching between them, Oliver gripped himself, sliding across her sex, finding her entrance, and she mewled, arching her back, her hard nipples scraping at his chest.
"Damn it, Felicity," Oliver breathed. "I don't think I can…"
"So don't," she replied just as breathlessly and Oliver's eyes found hers before he thrust in to the hilt. Felicity let out a sharp yell. She was so wet, so ready for him that he slid into her with beautiful ease, and her walls clamped down around him at the intrusion. Oliver stayed still, letting her become acclimated to him before he pulled out slowly, so slowly, before pushing back in.
"God, Felicity, you feel… so good, so…" he whispered, settling over her pressing her further into the mattress, pulling out just as slowly and thrusting back in, wanting to savor every goddamn second of this.
Heaven. This is what heaven on earth was. In the arms of the woman he loved, sharing their love in the most intimate way possible.
Felicity wrapped her arms around his shoulders, her hand finding the back of his head as she lifted her hips to meet his gentle thrusts. The wet sound of her sex in time with their heavy breathing started to fill the room as their thrusts started becoming more urgent.
Oliver pushed his arm under her shoulders, cradling her against him as he slid his hand down her side, needing to touch her, feel her. She whispered her pleasure, babbling his name, her voice stringent with need as he angled his hips up, brushing against her clit. She gasped, holding him tighter, and Oliver turned his head, seeking out her lips.
Her kiss was soft and gentle, making his heart soar.
He was making love to Felicity, as he had dreamt about doing since they'd defeated Slade. Since the words 'I love you' had been so much more than a trick, a distraction.
They had been truth. Revelation. Beauty. Power.
Light.
"Oliver," she whispered and he pulled back, his hips slowing. She cradled his face in her hands, her lips trembling as she traced his features with his fingers. "I love you. I love you so much."
He smiled at her, and the smile she gave him lit up the entire room.
He swooped down, pressing his lips to her, whispering, "I love you, Felicity. I love you."
When Oliver thrust in this time, it was harder, making her gasp his name, and he pushed his knees up, thrusting deeper. Her head fell back, her eyes fluttering shut, and Oliver pressed a kiss to her bottom lip, to her chin, to her jaw, everywhere before he braced himself and lifted her up off the bed, making her squeak in surprise.
Oliver shifted with her still in his arms, settling on his haunches as she wrapped her legs around him and the new angle had him going deeper. Her nails dug into his shoulders, a long drawn out, "Aaahhhh," slipping from her chest as he settled deep within her before she lifted herself, thrusting back down with a gasp of pleasure he felt all the way to his bones.
For a tender minute it was nothing but gentle thrusts and soft caresses, sweet kisses and whispered words as they made love to each other. As they held on, neither wanting the moment to end, neither wanting the next day to come.
Oliver felt her crisis coming when she started to tremble in his arms. She gasped his name, her hips starting to move more urgently over him, grasping him closer.
"Come for me, Felicity," he whispered into her ear, sliding a hand into her hair where he made a tight fist, and she moaned as his hips moved faster to meet hers. "Come for me, baby, come for me."
"Oliver," she panted. "Oliver, Oliver… Ah!"
Oliver gasped with her when she came, when she arched back, her walls pulsing around him, her body stiff with pleasure. She cried out again when Oliver grasped her hip with one hand, his arm slipping around her back, thrusting up into her with short hard jerks of his hips that had his spine tingling with awareness, every inch of him on fire as he sought out his release.
"Oliver… Oliver…!"
With a hoarse cry, Oliver came, spilling into her.
I love you.
They made love five more times before the morning sun started to warm the room.
Oliver didn't sleep the entire night. When he wasn't showing Felicity every way he could possibly think of to show her how much he loved her, they talked, or they listened to the strangely lulling sound of Nanda Parbat at night, or he watched her when she would doze off before she would wake with a start, her eyes immediately looking for him like she was afraid he had disappeared.
He took his sweet time when that happened, showing her he was there, he wasn't going anywhere.
The second time she cried, and he cried with her.
She was sleeping when the sun started to rise, and Oliver watched the light turn her skin a dull fiery yellow.
His fingers traced the scar from the bullet she'd taken for Sara.
His Felicity.
His beautiful, strong, amazing Felicity.
Wrapping his arms around her from behind, Oliver nuzzled his face against the back of her neck, letting himself pretend that this was any other morning.
That they were in Starling City, that the last several months hadn't happened, that the bomb at their dinner hadn't happened, that they had fallen in love the best way possible, that they woke up like this every single day, warm and sated with love, and…
Together.
Forever.
The End
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