A Song of Lightsabers and Revenge

What if Arya Stark had met Darth Maul and embraced the Dark Side of the Force? As revenge is the way of the Sith, she decides to go after an old adversary: King Joffrey. This one short explores a highly unlikely scenario: elements of Star Wars finding its way into Game of Thrones. For those of you familiar with Cartoon Network's The Clone Wars TV series, Darth Maul survived his duel with Obi-Wan Kenobi and now sports a pair of mechanical legs. I wrote this story to coincide with April Fools so don't take it too seriously. Any recognisable Game of Thrones and Star Wars character rightfully belongs to George R.R. Martin, HBO, and Lucasfilm. This story is told from the perspectives of Sansa and Arya Stark. Feel free to leave some comments but keep them respectful.

Arya's Revenge

Night had fallen at the Red Keep. It was supper time and King Joffrey Baratheon and his family were feasting on a late supper of clam chowder and hot oven-baked barley bread. While tens of thousands across King's Landing and Westeros had to go to bed hungry, the King of the Seven Kingdoms could expect three hot meals a day. As royalty, Joffrey and his family did not have to do a single stitch of cooking or housework. Everything was done by an army of servants and cooks.

Sansa Stark sat beside Joffrey's younger sister Myrcella Baratheon. Directly opposite her sat Tommen Baratheon, Joffrey's younger brother and the next-in-line to succeed him. It had been more than two months since her betrothed Joffrey had beheaded her father Ned Stark despite promising to spare his life. Sansa could not bear to look at the face of that capricious boy king and his pathetic mother, the Queen Regent Cersei Lannister. Hatred and rage boiled in her heart everything she had to be with them. Her tomboyish younger sister Arya Stark had completely disappeared following father's arrest and the raid on their quarters at the Red Keep.

In her mind, Sansa kicked herself for falling in love with Joffrey's blonde hair and handsome charms. The boy king's handsome façade hid a petulant, sadistic monster. Just a week ago, Joffrey had ordered her stripped naked and beaten in the presence of his entire court. Only, his dwarf uncle Tyrion Lannister had stood up for her and dared to challenge the King's authority in the only way he could: rhetoric disguised as a history lesson. Despite the warm sunshine, beautiful well-kept gardens, and luxury of the Red Keep, Sansa had come to hate King's Landing. She longed to return to King's Landing and live with her mother, sister Arya, and brothers. The only consolation about the Red Keep was that Myrcella and Tommen were not like their capricious older brother. They were friendly and gentle children who did not enjoy hurting other people and animals.

As Sansa raised her chalice or red Dornish wine, the room began to shake. On the other side of the table, Cersei's glass shattered on the floor, spilling red wine all over her purple dress. Opposite her, Tommen's plate fell off the table and shattered into a dozen pieces.

"Oh damn, my new dress is ruined," scowled Cersei, as she shook the remaining droplets from her vivid purple dress

"I can't believe it," grumbled Ser Meryant, who had been standing guard at the door nearby.

"King's Landing hasn't had an earthquake for hundreds of years."

"Can someone fetch the damned servants," barked Joffrey, who was trying to wipe off the messy chowder stew on his crimson tunic "Look at my beautiful new…"

Before the boy king could finish his sentence, the large glass window overlooking Blackwater Bay shattered. A large, black object charged into the room, landing a few feet away from the dining battle. The black object was not a beast but it made a loud, constant mechanical roar. Two hooded figures rode on the back of that black mechanic monster. A gust of wind blew off the hood of the first figure, revealing a man with red skin dotted by black spots. He had bright yellow-orange eyes and several cranial horns across his head. He had a large pair of metallic legs that were more flexible and versatile than any of the best ironsmiths in Westeros could device. His companion was a small child-sized figure dressed in black clothes. Both of these strangers sported flashing, red swords which grew in the darkness.

"Seven hells," howled Joffrey, who was trying to hide his fear "Ser Meryn and Ser Boros, deal with these intruders now!"

The two King's Guard charged at the intruders with their swords. However, the first figure easily dispatched them with his flaming red sword. The red-skinned demon sliced Ser Boros across his should and thigh with one stroke of his flaming red sword. His weapon seemed to cut through flesh and bone like a knife running through hot butter. The creature then turned his attention to Ser Meryn and beheaded him with another swift stroke. Ser Meryn's head flew across the room and landed on Myrcella's plate with a loud thump.

Myrcella, Tommen, and Sansa screamed in fear and terror. Tommen burst into tears and hugged Sansa. Despite the swift and brutal nature of Ser Meryn's death, Sansa could not help thinking that it was some kind of poetic justice. The Kingsguard Ser Meryn had been nothing more than a lapdog of King Joffrey. He had slapped her twice for daring to tell the petulant boy king a piece of her mind. On another occasion, he had not hesitated to cut her dress and strip her naked at the King's orders. Sansa managed to flash a weak smile at the knowledge that one of her former tormentors had met his end.

Sensing that the intruder had come for her and her children, the Queen Regent Cersei threw the hot, ceramic pot of chowder at the intruders. However, the red-skinned demon's companion merely deflected the object with a mere flick of her arm. The pot was instead hurtled across the room and smashed against the heavy oak door; sending clams, soup, and broken crockery raining across the dining room.

Suddenly, an unseen force took hold of Cersei. She was choking and grasping for breath even though nobody was strangling her. She held her neck but to no avail as the choking continued for another minute. Then, there was a deathly silence. Sansa saw Cersei's still eyes staring into the horizon.

Joffrey gave a howl of terror and tried to flee the room but tripped on a loose chair. The second figure then leapt onto the table. By then, the boy king had managed to get back to his feet and unsheathe his sword, a steel sword named Hearteater. Joffrey had lost his earlier sword during an "incident" with Arya Stark and the butcher's boy Micah while traveling back to King's Landing.

Joffrey charged at the second intruder but the stranger shattered the boy king's sword with its red, flaming sword. As fast as a serpent, the intruder brought Joffrey to his knees with a swift kick to his crotch. As Joffrey nursed his wounded crotch, the intruder brought its flaming blade over the boy king. Joffrey broke into tears and begged for his life.

Despite her hatred for the boy king who had murdered her father and her servants, Sansa found herself begging for the stranger not to kill Joffrey. Myrcella hid behind her for safety while Tommen had taken refuge under a table. Suddenly, the second stranger flicked off her hood and Sansa found herself staring into the face of somewhere very familiar that she had not expected to see again.

It was none other than her younger sister Arya Stark. True to her tomboy ways, Arya was dressed in boy's clothes. She had also cut off her long, dark hair and now looked like a boy at first glance.

"Arya, is that really you?," asked Sansa, half-frightened and half-relieved to see her sister "What are you doing here? And what's going on here?"

"Sorry, sis' it's a long story," replied Arya "After escaping King's Landing, I met that dude over there. He's called Darth Maul and he's taught me a lot of new things. And now, I have returned to kill the boy king who murdered our father."

Sansa turned to the window and saw the red demon standing over the motionless body of the Queen Regent.

"Please, don't kill me," sobbed Joffrey pathetically "I'll give you anything, even gold and diamonds."

"I'm not come for your wealth," said Arya grimly "I've come for your life just as you took my father's life."

"No, noooo," wailed Joffrey

Without a moment's hesitation, Arya drove her flaming red sword into King Joffrey's heart. The boy king gurgled and gasped for a moment. His face turned pale and motionless. There was a sharp stink as the boy king's bowels emptied for a final time. While Sansa welcomed the death of her former tormentor, she could not help feeling uncomfortable about his violent death. Sansa saw a sadistic grin on Arya's face.

"Arya, please come back after all this," pleaded Sansa "Our mother and brothers at Winterfell miss you dearly."

"I've found a new path beyond my family," replied Arya "Darth Maul will guide me to reach my full destiny. Isn't that right?"

"Yep," replied the red demonic figure "I will teach her the ways of the Sith. She has just completed the first step on her journey to the Dark Side. Now, Arya, we better go before more guards come."

As Arya turned to rejoin her companion, Sansa fought back her tears to say, "Arya, remember you'll always be welcome at Winterfell."

"Maybe, but there's a big, wide galaxy out there," replied Arya, as she and her companion got onto their black beast. The black beast rumbled and disappeared through the broken window, leaving behind a foul-smelling grey cloud.

The Aftermath

It had been over six months since the mysterious deaths of King Joffrey and his mother the Queen-Regent Cersei. Throughout Westeros, tales circulated that a pair of black demons riding a monstrous beast had invaded the Red Keep and killed the King and his mother. Shortly later, the boy's grandfather, Lord Tywin Lannister, had been found dead at a privy in Harrenhal. While there was no sign that he had been killed, Sansa knew that Arya and her mysterious red demonic companion were somehow responsible was death. The Lannisters were not the only ones to pay their debts. To protect her sister Arya, Sansa had omitted to mention that Arya was one of the assassins.

In the wake of the deaths of three of the most important people in Westeros, Joffrey's younger brother Tommen had ascended to the throne. The Imp Tyrion Lannister had become the new Lord-Regent while the boy king's uncle Kevan Lannister had become the new Hand of the King. Under the leadership of Tyrion and Kevan, the Crown and the Lannisters had made peace with King Robb and allowed the North to secede in return for an exchange of hostages and a military alliance against the usurper Stannis Baratheon. Stannis, who had since abandoned the Faith of the Seven to worship R'hllor, the Lord of Light, was widely believed to have had a hand in the death of King Joffrey, his mother, and his grandfather.

Sansa was now safely back at home in Winterfell. She had been released by the Crown in exchange for the safe return of the Kingslayer Jaime Lannister. The nights were longer and colder in the North but there was no place better than home. Sansa had spent the day playing with her younger brothers Bran and Rickon Stark. While Bran had woken up following his "accident", he could no longer use his legs. Instead, he was carried around by the stable hand Hodor, a simple lad believed to have giant blood in his veins.

Sansa had also developed an unlikely friendship with Osha, the Wildling woman who had met Bran in the woods. While sewing together, Osha had taught her a great deal about life beyond the Walls. Her mother Catelyn and older brother Robb Stark had since returned to Winterfell. Robb was now King in the North and Winterfell was now the capital. Her half-brother Jon Snow had left for the Wall to join the Night's Watch, a military order devoted to guarding the northern reaches of Westeros from Wildlings and if rumoured, the Ice Walkers, who were beginning to awake. The end of the war in the South had enabled King Robb to pay greater attention to Mance Rayder's Wildling horde massing beyond the Wall.

While Sansa was glad that the petulant King Joffrey was dead and that she was now safely back at home in Winterfell, she could not help missing her little sister Arya Stark. True that Arya was sometimes a pain in the neck who had once spoiled her dress and loved getting her clothes muddy. But she was still family and blood was always thicker than water. Sansa gazed into the stars above hoping that Arya was safe with her new "friend" and that she would one day return home.

Epilogue

Somewhere deep in space, Arya was sparring with her new master in one of their frequent training sessions. Darth Maul was much more aggressive and demanding than her former sword instructor Syrio Forel. He could also be fierce and violent at times. But, Arya was grateful to the man who had helped her avenge her dead father. This man was now leading her to a greater destiny that lay beyond Westeros.

They were traveling on Darth Maul's personal ship, a dagger-shaped vessel with bat-like wings called the Scimitar. Equipped with a strange machine called a hyperdrive, the spaceship was capable of travelling at the speed of light. Darth Maul's Scimitar glided through space just like a ship glided through water.

Arya had met the mysterious red figure called Darth Maul after escaping an attack by the Goldcloaks on her traveling party who were heading north to join the Night's Watch. While Arya was initially frightened by the red-skinned man, she had come to find a kindred spirit in him. Both were consumed by a desire for revenge against those who had wronged them. Darth Maul sought revenge against the Jedi Knight Obi-Wan Kenobi who had maimed him and the Sith Lord Darth Sidious who had abandoned him. Meanwhile, Arya sought vengeance against Joffrey for murdering her father. In the end, the two had struck an alliance. Darth Maul agreed to help Arya kill King Joffrey in return for Arya becoming his Sith apprentice and helping him to kill those who had wronged him.

"So, where are we going my master," asked Arya, during a break from their sparring session. She was sweaty and her body and clothes were soaked in sweat.

"To Coruscant," replied Darth Maul in a grim, deathly voice "It's a planet covered entirely in city. Imagine King's Landing a million times over. My former master and his new apprentice now rule over the galaxy from there. Together, we will overthrow them and will rule the galaxy."

"Yes, my Lord," said Arya.

The End

Endnotes

I hope that you all enjoyed this hypothetical Star Wars-Game of Thrones crossover. Like many fans, I have fantasized about killing Joffrey off. So what better way than blending the two fantasy genres together. I initially toyed about having a Joffrey-Jar Jar Binks short story. But after reading Bryan Young's article on the Den of Geeks, I decided not to be mean to Jar Jar Binks. He may be irritating and obnoxious but at heart he's a good person. Both Joffrey and Jar Jar Binks are characters that many fans love to hate but there is a clear moral line between the two characters. Jar Jar may be a fool but he wouldn't condone the killing of innocent babies unlike Joffrey. Plus, I've always thought that Arya Stark might make a good Sith give all that she's gone through in the TV series.

Cheers,

Andrew Lim